Kakashi's idea of a good time don't usually end well for others.
Also, Sakura deserves all the love for being able to put up with her ridiculous teammates.
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Once upon a time, Kakashi was just your (not) average ninja serving his village. Killing people here, stabbing people there, the usual.
But one day, the wise (and senile) Sandaime gave him an important mission: to guide the future generation down the path of shinobi and make them better than their predecessors.
With great reluctance (that isn't even fake), Kakashi (reluctantly) accepted his duty to become the shepard and guide these lost little lambs (to slaughter).
Yet every lambs that came his way was unworthy of the knowledge he desires (and has no intention) to give and so he turned them away.
For months he sent the lambs back to their mothers and prays (to Kushina-san) that he will (never) be given the chance to pass his knowledge.
(Un)Fortunately, his (real) prayers were (not) answered.
Which is how he ended up sitting in front of three little children cutely growling and making threats at him from their tied-up position. Naruto was the loudest which is unsurprising since Foxes tend to be very vocal, followed by Sakura who surprisingly had a very creative imagination and also a very dirty mouth unbefitting of someone with a Rabbit mask while Sasuke just glowered and hissed at him like the little Cat he is.
All in all, Kakashi had a not-so-terrible day today.
"So, my little gremlins~ what did we learn today?"
"That you are a fucking asshole." Sakura spat out venomously.
"That your traps sucks!" Naruto shouted loudly and sticks his tongue out.
Sasuke just continued glowering and hissing at him.
Kakashi wiped a fake tear away. "Look at you three finally thinking the same thing." he fake-sniffed. "Look at how much you've grown."
"We just met yesterday," Sakura ground out through gritted teeth.
"And look at how much you've grown!" Kakashi said again.
Another round of threats and insults and growls were once again hurled at him and Kakashi just sat there and soaked it up happily.
So what if he got a little petty when Sandaime said he can't fail them? If he has to suffer them, then they have to suffer him too. Now it's a lose-lose situation and everyone will suffer as much as he does.
By the time the sun was high enough, his three little genins had tired out and are now slumped against the log they were tied to.
"Sensei~ I'm hungry~" Naruto complained.
Well, most of them were tired out.
"Now, now, Naruto. You know the rules. You didn't manage to run away from me so no lunch for you." he reminds him.
Naruto makes a face at that. "It's not fair! You're a Dog! Of course you'll find us easily!" he whined.
Kakashi raised an eyebrow at that. "Why do you think I'm a Dog?" he asked curiously despite the boy being completely wrong about his true mask.
Now it's Sakura's turn to make a face at him. "We're not stupid, sensei." she huffs. "You're quite famous and people had said you wore a Dog mask when you were Anbu."
That last word grabbed everyone's attention.
Kakashi blinked in surprise. While it's an open secret that he was Anbu, the only one who actually knew about it are shinobi his age, the Anbus, the higher-ups and those who were smart enough to figure it out. He's quite surprised to know that Sakura, a civillian, knew about it.
"You were in Anbu, sensei? That's so cool!" Naruto looked at him in awe, his anger towards Kakashi immediately forgotten.
Even Sasuke looked as if he's seeing Kakashi in a new light.
Ignoring the two boys, Kakashi gave Sakura a critical eye. "How did you know about that, Sakura?" he asked.
"Yeah, yeah! How did you know that, Sakura-chan?!" Naruto turned his attention towards her.
Sakura blushed at the attention she was given. The bravado she had earlier when she was cursing her superior had seem to evaporate. "W-well, people talk a lot and... no one really care much when they see a little girl, especially a Rabbit... so they tend to... look over me..." she trailed off meekly.
"And?" Naruto prompted encouragingly.
"Um, well... I heard from two shinobi-san mentioning about Kakashi-sensei... they were talking about him retiring from Anbu and mentioned about his mask..." she told them hesitantly. She then looked at Kakashi with worried eyes. "Will I be in trouble for eavesdropping? It's supposed to be a secret, right?" she asked innocently.
"I'm afraid so," Kakashi lied easily.
Sakura immediately paled at the thought, no doubt thinking the worst possible outcomes. Tears started to gather in her eyes and her lips trembled a little. "I don't want to go to jail," she said in horror.
"No way! I'll fight anyone who tries to take you away, Sakura-chan!" Naruto exclaimed.
"Don't be stupid, Dobe. You can barely fight Kakashi. What makes you think you can fight against Jounins?" Sasuke, surprisingly, made a good point.
"But! But! Sakura didn't do anything wrong!" Naruto gave a distressed look at the Uchiha. "We can't let her be taken away like that!"
By now, Sakura is crying and hiccuping lightly as she valiantly tries not to sob out loud.
Sasuke rolled his eyes at Naruto. "Use your brains! You're good friends with the Hokage, right?"
"Old Man? Yeah, why?"
"Then you can ask him to not arrest her."
"But what if he doesn't agree?" Kakashi cuts in, amused by the play-by-play he's seeing. "What if the Sandaime doesn't want to release her? What then?"
Naruto cast a desperate look at Sasuke. Sakura is now really trying hard not to wail out loud by biting her lips. Sasuke makes a face as he thinks. Kakashi just sits there and enjoys the show.
" Then... we cause a distraction." Sasuke finally suggested.
"Distraction?" Naruto echoed. "How?"
"I know some fire jutsus. I could burn a house down or something," Sasuke offered.
Naruto frowns at that. "Isn't that dangerous? What will you do if the fire spreads?"
"Why should I care?" Sasuke challenged.
"Because if it spreads then Konoha will burn and then where will we live?" Naruto shoots back.
"Um..."
The two boys turned to look at Sakura.
"Wh-what if Naruto becomes distraction instead?" she suggested through tears.
Sasuke gave her a doubtful look. "How can he do that?"
"W-well, he always pranks people right?" she eyed Naruto and got a nod in return. "And distractions don't have to be dangerous," she continued, her voice going stronger as she talks, "it can also be harmless like pranks. As long as people are distracted by, say the hokage monument getting vandalised or a sudden mass explosion of glitters everywhere, then that's okay too right?"
Sasuke looks thoughtful at that.
"A-and it also saves our chakra so we could use it to escape." she added.
The three of them was suddenly jolted out from their deep discussion when a laugh was heard.
They looked up at Kakashi and eyed him warily as their sensei laughed and laughed and kept on laughing as if he had finally lost his mind.
"Right." Kakashi said decisively, abruptly ending his laugh. His three genins gave him a weirded-out look but Kakashi chose to ignore that. "While I do love to hear your jailbreak plans, I have to unfortunately stop you there."
With a few flicks of his hand, the rope binding them fell to the ground, freeing them from the wooden post.
"Congratulations, you three gremlins passed the test." Kakashi smiled happily as he announced the result to them.
The genins traded looks before looking back at Kakashi, distrust clearly seen in their eyes.
"I thought we failed when we got caught by you?" Naruto asked in confusion.
"Those who break the rules are trash. But those who abandon their comrades are worst than trash." Kakashi solemnly said. "Your willingness to burn a house down just to save Sakura had made me realise that you three might be worth my time after all."
The three of them was silent. Until Sakura's eyes widened and she set two angry eyes on Kakashi. "You were playing with us!" she exclaimed.
Both boys realised what she meant and set their eyes on him too. Now he has three angry genins looking at him as if they want to murder him.
How adorable.
"Well done noticing it, Sakura! Now run along to your houses and think about today's lesson. Also, get plenty of rest because tomorrow we'll begin the real test. Toodles!" Kakashi said before he disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
The scream of frustration coming from the training grounds after that had never sound so sweet like before to Kakashi.