For Dante.
Sorry y'all gotta read my sad venting crap.
Dear Dante,
I'm sorry, I'm so so so so sorry! I know you've forgive me and everything, but I can't help but feel guilty. I wish I could go back and do things differently! I'd do anything to go back! I'd give you the moon, hell Id steal it for you.
You were the reason why my head was above water. And I'm not lying.
Death came for you, I would give my life just to see you smile again. You didn't chose that life, it chose you. I remember when I came to America, you were the second person I met. And I'm still sorry I ruined your jeans with my tea, I still owe you a pair.
I cry every night knowing that I could've saved you and I didn't. And I'm sorry.
I go to sleep wearing your clothes, I talk to your picture everyday. And every holiday I go to your grave and leave Tulips, cause I know you loved them. I sit and talk to you for hours and I know that you won't respond, but I wish you could.
I remeber when I was upset because no one wanted to kiss me during spin the bottle at that party. And I was on the swings behind your house, and you kissed me. The kiss swing. New people live there, but they let me go in the backyard and swing on the swing.
When it rains, I play your favorite song because you used to dance in the rain. When it snows I leave a cup of hot choclate out for you. When your favorite tea is on sale, I buy it and leave the box at your grave.
You're always in my mind and I love you.
I should've moved on, and I have. But I can never be fully happy or ever forget you. I've lost too many people and I lost you. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I'm not being strong like I promised, I'm sorry I'm not doing what you asked.
I cant bring myself to do it.
I still love you. I always will.
I write you letters every week because it makes me feel better. And I never take off your chain. I remember when you first bought it you were so proud, you saved up to buy it. It may be small but you always flexed that it was 100% gold.
I'm sorry.
I loved you.
Veronica 💖
P.s
Tell Vinny I said hi and I'm sorry I ate him in the womb.
I'm doing better, and I'm trying.