Kylo was rested against the stone wall. He kept his head up but from how he nodded it to the sides you could easily see the pain it caused him. You grabbed his hand, removed the glove and took his pulse. Too high.
You cursed quietly and grabbed a knife from your medbag, you swiftly cut his clothes open, carefully avoiding any of the shrapnels stuck in him. His hand moved towards them and you quickly grabbed his wrist, stopping him from touching them.
"Don't remove them, Sir, they might be blocking arteries.", you held onto his wrist a tad longer making sure he had understood.
A deep groan came from under his helmet and you continued to cut away his clothing. There was one wound where there was no shard anymore. It was bleeding heavily. The colour was dark, indicating that it had not hit an artery. You looked up at the helmet, you could have stared at the wall next to it just as well, there was no difference in expression.
You grabbed some sterile bandages and pressed it on the wound, he did not make much of a sound the adrenaline was still heavily present in his system and most certainly keeping him from feeling the full extent of the pain.
"Please press onto this, Sir.", you said, grabbing his hand and pushing it onto his own wound before examining the rest of his body for further perhaps heavier bleeding wounds.
In the distance you could hear the familiar sound of a ship coming closer, it could be one of yours. It could also be the enemy and you did not want to give up your position if it was the latter.
You took your blaster and after a brief look outside you saw the familiar white armour of First Order Stormtroopers making their way towards you.
Kylo did not look great. You had a feeling that he would have looked less vulnerable and miserable without his helmet on, even though you did not know what he did look like below it.
You kneeled down next to him and pressed onto the wound again.
"You're gonna be fine, Sir. You're gonna be fine. Backup is coming.", you said quietly, more to yourself than to him. You looked at your own hands, now tainted red with his blood. If you would not be pressing them this tightly onto his wound right now they would most certainly tremble. You were not exactly sure why and took a few deep breaths to calm yourself down as much as you could.
Kylo moved his helmet slightly, as if he was looking at you, but it was hard to tell where exactly he was focusing. You tried to get back into your own trance, focusing on only the wound but you were unable to. It bothered you immensely that you could not get back to concentrating properly. It couldn't be the adrenaline, or could it? Going by logic you should have just as much adrenaline in your body when working on the battlefield. You pressed your jaw together in an attempt to focus again.
Before you could worry about it even further the approaching stormtroopers entered the cave. You heaved his body up a stretcher with the help of a soldier and together you made your way towards the ship.
"Out of the way!", You shouted towards everyone blocking the entrance. They quickly shuffled away, clearing the space. The medbay had already been cleared and the stormtroopers helped get your patient onto the bed. They left and you immediately stripped off the armour on yourself. It looked horrible. Part of it had been broken off, you did not even understand how it had happened. So much blood as well. And dirt. You kicked it into a corner and grabbed yourself some scrubs which you just threw over the tight black shirt and pants you wore underneath the armor usually. You disinfected your hands, put on a surgical mask and gloves and could finally help the poor bastard lying in front of you.
Your hands were still trembling and you clenched your fists for a moment in a desperate attempt to calm yourself down.
"Okay, okay, okay...this could be worse.", you mumbled while grabbing everything necessary for a blood transfusion. You held the blood bag up to show Kylo what you were about to do.
"Do you want painkillers?", you asked. He briefly lifted up his head, shook it and then let it fall down onto the bed again. Alright, it was up to him. You had the feeling that you would not be able to convince him either. You could relate to it quite well, you avoided taking pain killers like the plague.
From your experience there were really only two types of doctors. The ones that took painkillers at the mildest of headaches, went to take antibiotics if they had a small scratch and the ones that no matter how bad a situation got did not dare to see another doctor. You belonged to the latter. It had not always been a good idea either, but you still prefered it that way.
You started working on the wound that was already open, cauterizing the broken vein and sewing it back up before moving onto the next wound. A quick scan showed you that neither of the shards had penetrated any big arteries, a few small ones, yes but nothing that would be life endangering the moment you would pluck them out.
The door opened and in came two stormtroopers shoving in an old medical droid. Perfect! He was a bit outdated but made well enough so that he would be able to properly assist you.
The next big shrapnel was no problem, Kylo groaned loudly but endured it. You could feel that he was on edge. Barely containing himself, so you opted for removing a few of the smaller shrapnels first before tackling the last big one.
The moment you touched it you flew through the air against a wall. You had fast enough reflexes to shield your head and it only crashed against your right arm. The way down onto the ground felt painfully slow however. Not as painful as your whole right side felt though. You sat on the floor for a few seconds, processing what just had happened. A loud groan escaped your lips as you slowly stood up and leaned against the wall.
Why was the wall wet? You turned your head to see the gigantic smear of blood. Frantically you checked yourself to see what had caused it. Your entire leg was bloody. Oh great. Lovely. Absolutely lovely. On the other hand... atleast you finally understood why your armour was broken. Filling out the report and request for a new one would now be a lot easier to explain! You anyway despised bureaucracy, having 'unknown reason' written in a form was only cause for more pain! Perhaps not necessarily more than what you were enduring now...
You had been sure that Kylo was the only one that had been affected by the explosion. It seemed like you had been wrong. Again. Today really was not your day. What was next? Not being able to do the simplest forms of math anymore? You started counting in your head. Alright, you had probably skipped a few numbers, but it's not like that did not always happen.
You changed your gloves, got an IV for yourself, changed them again and continued. That dreaded shrapnel that had caused you to take flight lessons, was going to stay where it was. For now atleast.
There was really no choice for you. You could help the Supreme Leader first and after you were done you could help yourself, or you could do it the other way round. Theoretically. Practically though, if you did do it the other way round and he died...then you'd be executed. He did not even have to die, what mattered was that you had to put his needs above your own. Frankly, the chances of your survival were far greater if you first helped your patient.
Apart from that, finally knowing why you yourself had so much adrenaline in your veins gave you your sense of calmness back and the rest of the work was done far quicker and more accurate than the beginning.
Something about the pain made you concentrate more. Helped you get back into that headspace of yours.
You had cleaned and sewn up the rest of the wounds. Only one missing now. You stared at it angrily, fully aware that touching it might just send you flying again.
"Sir, I still have to remove the shrapnel.", you said, his head turning slightly towards you. "I'd appreciate you not throwing me away again.", you tried to keep your voice firm, but it broke halfway through, not necessarily helping your point.
He nodded and grabbed the table, holding onto it. You in turn grabbed the shrapnel with both hands, another nod from him and you finally pulled it out. He groaned loudly, barely managing to stop himself from screaming. You put the shrapnel away, hands once again trembling.
"Well done. It's over soon, Sir.", your voice was quiet and you fixed up the last wound. The stitches were neat and would be able to drain. He was gonna be fine. You hoped. An infection might be the only thing that could harm him now, but you did disinfect it with some UV rays before.
You opened the door to find two men, dressed in similar attire to Kylo's standing in front of the door. Neither of them were as tall or intimidating as Kylo, they still had a similar sort of 'aura' if you wanted to call it that. Still. Nothing as heavy and able to take as much space as the supreme leader's. You stepped out of the way, clearing the path for them.
"I'm done. He should be fine."
They entered and exchanged a few quiet words. You did not care to listen, instead you changed your gloves once again and sat down in a chair in the corner. You inspected the shrapnel. The scan said...something, you could not properly read it, but given there was a green arrow somewhere in the corner...it should be fine.
You bit on a bandage and quickly pulled out the shrapnel. Your breathing was heavy and rapid but you were proud of yourself for not having screamed, the loud groan that escaped your lips could be ignored. You stared at the shrapnel between your fingers and threw it onto your armour.
"Bloody bastard.", you said quietly and raised your head to see one of the men looking over in your direction. You ignored it and sewed the wounds up. It's not like they needed many stitches.
You cleaned up your tools, hoping it would be enough to get the two to leave, but they did not really intend to. There was still talk, parts of it about the mission and that they had in fact found both the kyber crystals and the few force sensitives that were hiding there. Eventually you just decided to throw them out.
"I'm sorry, but you have to leave. Give him some rest, please."
"We'll leave. We'll be guarding the door."
You just nodded and made sure that Kylo was doing alright. The moment they left he seemed to relax more, you grabbed a blanket and put it over him. It should have been hard to tell what he was feeling, given he was still wearing the helmet. Helmets were not really known for being very expressive either. Still, somehow you understood him. Not necessarily everything and it was much harder to tell than it had been before. You knew that he was fine with having a blanket over him, and you also knew that he was everything but fine with having his helmet removed. It's not like it was necessary either, he did not have a head trauma after all.
You changed his IV bag and removed your own. You got a small field bed out, prepared it and finally were able to lie down. You had not really realized how much you needed sleep, or just a chance to rest your feet up to now.
Within mere minutes drifted off into sleep's warm embrace.