I just don't know what to do..
I hurt my best friend. I didn't mean to but I'm an idiot and often don't think before I speak.
I want to cry.. I want to scream..
I miss my friends..
I want badly to cut but I can't find my damn blade.. not to mention a certain someone will kill me if I do..
I've got no money, I can't find work. I have no self esteem and I can't seem to do anything other than hurt the people I love..
These days it's hard just to smile. I barely have a thing to smile for anymore.. I want my blade so badly.. need to make myself hurt.. I hurt someone I care a lot about.. I deserve it..
I deserve everything I get. I'm useless, worthless.. All I do is hurt people and push them away.. I just.. I want to die but I want to live.. It's like I'm numb.. but I'm in pain at the same fucking time.. I- I just...
I just don't know what to do..
Someone.. help me.. please..
I don't know how much more I can take...