(Had to make it short sorry.)
[Third Person Pov]
~~~A Room Somewhere
You woke up in your bed with a throbbing headache.
Y/n: M-m-major hangover.
The covers rustled a bit, then Niffty's head popped out.
Niffty: Did you enjoy last night Y/n?
Y/n: I can't even remember last night, guess you did a good job.
You pet her head and Niffty smiled.
*knock* *knock* *knock*
Y/n: Put some clothes on Niffty.
Niffty got out of the bed and put on some clothes while you put on some pants.
Y/n: Come in.
The door opened and in came Alastor.
Alastor: Ah, sport, you're finally awake.
Y/n: Yep, any plans to today?
Alastor: Well that friend of yours has some sort of announcement planned on the picture show, I might watch it.
Y/n: Just call it a T.V.-Yeah, I'm gonna-
*Ringtone*
You answered your phone.
Y/n: What's up baby?
Charlie: ...Hey Y/n.
Charlie, you two haven't really talked since the whole game show thing.
Y/n: Uh...hey Charlie.
Charlie: You heard about my announcement right?
Y/n: I'm assuming it's about the hotel right?
Charlie: Yeah........I've missed talking to you.
Y/n: *sigh* Believe me, the feeling's mutual.
Charlie: I just...don't understand why you would do something like that, and you're still doing it.
Y/n: Well, I am still a patron. Don't worry, I'm rooting for you.
Charlie: Ok, I hope they see my vision.
Y/n: And Charlie.
Charlie: Yeah?
Y/n: Whatever you do...don't sing. Just...just don't.
Charlie: He said not to sing.
Vaggie: [Distant] I don't care what he says.
Charlie: *sigh* Bye Y/n...please...be good.
Then, the phone hung up.
Alastor: What's this about a hotel?
Y/n: You'll see. I'm gonna go for a walk.
Alastor: Alright sport, don't forget you have a show today.
Y/n: I won't.
You put on your outfit...but something was missing.
Y/n: Where's my hat?
Niffty popped up with your that on.
Niffty: Look! I'm Y/n! WHAT'S UP BITCHEEEEEEEEES?!
Y/n: Ah ha. Ah ha ha haaaa-gimme that.
You yanked the hat of her head and she giggled. You put it on and made your way out.
Y/n: Hey Husk.
Husk: Blow me.
Y/n: Understandable.
You went out the door.
Husk: Little brat.
~~~The Streets
A random demon fell from the sky and hit the ground hard.
Random Demon: Huh...I'm alive? I'm alive!!!
...He got ran over. The car came to a stop and out came Angel Dust who was fixing his clothes.
Demon: Thanks for the fun hot stuff.
Angel Dust: Yeah, yeah, listen. I can't let it get out that I'm offering my services to randos on street. It was a quick cash grab, ya got it?!
He smiled and shot finger guns at him.
Demon: Sure thing, SLUT! Hahaha!
Angel Dust: Ouch, ooh, such an insult! Let me know when you come up with something creative to call me you sack of poorly packaged horse shit!
Demon: ....
Angel Dust: Tell the missus I said hi. *smooch* Schrookums.
The Demon growled angrily and drove away...and crashed.
Angel Dust saw a drug machine and went to it. He reached in his pocket and put in the money from his service...it came back out. He tried again, back out. He got rid of every possible wrinkle...........nope. He gave the money a good long look.
Angel Dust: Dammit, it's fake!
???: Someone gave you fake money? What a surprise.
Angel turned around to see you with a cocky smile.
Angel Dust: Come on babe, spare me some cash?
Y/n: You can't come onto to me for a whole month.
Angel Dust: An hour.
Y/n: A week.
Angel Dust: A day.
Y/n: Deal.
You gave him the money.
Angel Dust: Thanks babe~
Y/n: What did I just say?
Angel put the money in and got the Angel Dust drug(who could've seen that coming?).
Y/n: Aren't you supposed to be clean?
Angel Dust: You're the one giving me drug money. And don't you host a show where you kill people for fun?
Y/n: .......Shut up.
A demon came and stole the drugs.
Demon: Yoink!
Y/n: OI!
Angel Dust: HEY!
Demon: Up yours, drag shows!-
He got crushed by debris.
Y/n: Woah!
Angel Dust: Oh my god!
They ran over, and Angel picked up the empty bag of drugs.
Angel Dust: My drugs! Dammit!
You take off your hat and looked down sadly.
Y/n: A moment of silence for le drugs.
Angel looked down sadly too.
Y/n: ..............Oh hey a blimp.
Angel Dust: A what?
He looked up to see blimp.
~~~Inside The Blimp
Sir Pentious: Hahaha! Those cowardly sinners dare not hinder my territorial takeover! A wise decision. The power of my machines are unmatched! No other demon can compare to the likes of it!
Egg Demon1: Gee that was pretty swell boss!
Egg Demon2: Yeah!
Egg Demon3: You really showed them what for! I liked when you shot them with your raygun-
S.P. slapped the Demon away, breaking him.
Egg Demon1: I wish he'd shoot me with his raygun.
Sir Pentious: At this rate, I will seize control of the entire west pentagram by day's end!
???: Don't you mean, we will seize control?
Sharly came in, now having a mechanical tail.
Sharly: We are partners after all.
Sir Pentious: Ah, yes, of course, we. And nothing, not a single beast in this inferno of suffering will be able to take back this empire from our consecutive grasp!
Egg Demon1: Oh boy!
Sharly: I like the sound of that.
Sir Pentious: Hell will be ours, and soon everyone will know the name of Sharly and Sir Pe-
???: Edgelord!
Sir Pentious: Pardon? Who said that?!
Sharly got in the face of a goon.
Sharly: Was it you? Huh? Speak up.
Egg Demon1: That wasn't us miss boss lady.
A bomb came through the window.
Sharly: GET DOWN!-
The bomb blew up and took out some of the goons. When the smoke cleared, it revealed Cherri Bomb.
Cherri Bomb: Looking for a fight? Old man? Oh, hey Sharly! Y/n really messed you up huh?
Sharly growled.
Cherri Bomb: Why don't you get that tinker toy bullshit, off my turf before I smash it?
A piece of the ship fell down.
Cherri Bomb: ...More.
Sharly: You wanna go bitch?
Sir Pentious: Well we are happy to oblige!
~~~666 News Station
Katie Killjoy: Hello, and welcome to 666 news. I'm Katie Killjoy.
Tom Trench: And I'm Tom Trench. Chaos as there is a turf war going on at the west side if the nine circles.
As they were explaining the situation, Vaggie was helping Charlie prepare in the back.
Vaggie: Alright, you remember your lines?
Charlie: Yes, of course!
Vaggie: Ok. And as much as I hate saying this, Y/n is right, don't sing.
Charlie: But I express myself better through song.
Vaggie: But life isn't a musical.
Charlie: *sigh* Fine! But I have these other ideas I want to say! The best parts are highlighted!
She gave Vaggie a price of paper.
Vaggie: ...It's all highlighted...is that a drawing?
Charlie: Yep! Everyone's Smiling and happy in heaven!
Vaggie: I don't think it's that simple. Just remember to go over the talking points, and do not sing!
Charlie: Fine. [Tracer voice] I'll just have to resort to my impeccable improv skills.
~~~Back on the streets
Angel Dust: Oh shit, Cherri! Y/n, we gotta help her!
Y/n: ...You do that, I'm gonna keep walking.
Angel Dust: What?!
Y/n: I have a throbbing headache man, I really can't deal with this shit.
You start walking away.
Angel Dust: Ugh, fine! Be like that!
Angel ran into the war.
Y/n: I really can't deal with-
Sharly: The gay spider too?!
Y/n: ...Shakira?
~~~666 News Station
Charlie was trying to get her point across. Keyword, "trying". Everyone was either borded or simply didn't care. So, she had to break out her secret weapon. She was going.......to SING!
Everyone was either laughing or making fun of her.
Katie Killjoy: What, in the everlasting FUCK, would make you think, that people would change? Just, because?! You have no proof that your dumb dream will even work!
Charlie: Well...we already have 1 patron, and he's making great progress!
Katie Killjoy: Oh? And you might this dumbass be?
Charlie: Oh...you know, just a little someone called...Angel Dust.
Ohhh~
Tom Trench: The gay porn star?
Katie Killjoy: You fucking would Tom.
She turned to him and he looked away nervously.
Katie Killjoy: All you need is some drugs and a bottle of lube to get him to do what you want!
Charlie: That's not true! He's been nice, helpful and super clean for two weeks!
Guy: BREAKING NEWS!
Katie pushed Charlie away.
Katie Killjoy: Our news reporter has just picked up that someone has joined the turf war. Let's go to the love feed.
The feed cut to the war, showing Angel stomping one of S.P.'s goons before throwing a grenade.
Katie Killjoy: Why, it appears that it's none other than famous porn start Angel Dust.
Charlie: ...Uh...well, Angel Dust isn't our only patron!
Katie Killjoy: Haha! Really! This should be good, who is it?
Charlie: Oh you know...no one special. Just a close friend. You might know him! He goes by...The Host.
Everyone gasped.
Charlie: Yeah! Didn't see that one coming did-
Tom Trench: Sorry to interrupt, but it looks like another person has joined the war!
Charlie: (Please don't be Y/n. Please don't be Y/n. Please for the love of God don't be Y/n!)
The feed showed you balling up one of Sharly's goons and bowling him into a line of S.P.'s goons.
Y/n: Screw the headache!
Charlie: Oh shit.
Katie Killjoy: Oh shit indeed! Both of your Patrons are participating in a turf war! How does it feel knowing that your plan is a failure?!
Tom+Katie: HAHAHAHA! RATINGS!
Charlie: Yeah?! Well.......*picks up pen* how does it feel that I have your pen huh? BIUTCH?!
Katie looked at her with a blank expression.
Charlie: Hehehe......oops.
Katie grew spider limbs and attacked Charlie.
~~~The Turf War
Cherri Bomb: Thanks for the backup boys!
Y/n: Anything to piss off Sharly.
Cherri: Hey Angie, where ya been? I thought you died or some shit.
Angel Dust: Oh I wish!
You pulled put a bomb and Angel lit it and gave it to Cherri, who happily took and threw it.
Angel Dust: I've been staying at this scrappy hotel on the other side of town. Some broads are letting stay rent free if I play nice.
*BOOM*
The three of them jumped from behind the rock. Angel shot his tommy gun, Cherri threw bombs, and you tore apart any demons that got close.
Angel Dust: Y'know, no fights, no pranks, no "problematic language". Her words not mine. These crazy bitches are no fun! I've been clean for two weeks!
Cherri Bomb: Holy shit!
Angel crushed a demon with a bat.
Angel Dust: Well...mostly clean. As clean as you can get with a shitload of Bolivian marching powder.
Cherri Bomb: What about you Y/n? You kinda dissapeard, thought you died too.
Y/n: Nah, just been focusing on my show is all. I'm also a patron at Happy Hotel. Just not staying there. And yeah, I just didn't feel like-
Sharly: DIE!
A spike went through your back.
Y/n: Oh look...I've been impaled.
You took Sharly and tossed her away. Then you yanked the spike out of you.
Y/n: ...Ow.
A chain wrapped around Angel and slammed him away. Sir Pentious went to him.
Angel Dust: Oh, harder daddy~
Sir Pentious: *gasp* Son?
Angel Dust:
Cherri came out of nowhere and kicked S.P. away. You joined Angel and Cherri.
Sharly: You fucking whores!
Sir Pentious: You have no class! In war, the side remembered is the side with the most style!
Y/n: Really? I thought it was the side that was...you know...alive?
You stomp on one of S.P.'s goons.
Angel Dust: Speaking of being alive, is your hat alive?
Sir Pentious: Oh well-that's none of your goddamn business, now is it?!
Angel Dust: Would that make your hat the top and you the bottom?
Egg Demon: OOOOHHHH!!!!
S.P. bopped his head.
Sharly: I am going to blow you all to bits!
Angel Dust: Mm, kinky~
Sharly: Not like that, pervert!
Y/n: You get used to it.
Sharly glared at you.
Sharly: ...I hate you.
Her mechanical tail wrapped around you and pulled you close.
Y/n: Oh, didn't think you'd be into bondage.
Sharly: FUCK YOU!
She pulled out a gun and shot you at least 52 times.
Y/n: You really need to stop.
You regenerated.
Y/n: I mean, you know I can just grow that back right?
Two demon hands came out your back.
Y/n: Like, come on!
They punched her, sending her flying into S.P.
Cherri Bomb: Think your gonna get in trouble for this Angie?
Angel Dust: Eh, what's a little brawl gonna cause?
~~~666 News Station
Charlie and Katie were in a serious fist fight. Tom was on fire.
Tom Trench: WHY WON'T ANYONE HELP ME?!?!?!
~~~Turf War
Cherri Bomb: Glad you haven't changed, you know you're my favorite guy to party with Angie!
Angel Dust: You know it sugar tits!
She reloaded his tommy. Cherri gave you a flirty look.
Cherri Bomb: And maybe I can swing by your place Y/n?
Y/n: Door will be unlocked.
You pulled out two shotguns as Cherri pulled out a bomb.
Cherri Bomb: You ready to end this boys?
Angel+Y/n: Born ready.
The three of you dove at Sharly, S.P. and the goons.
Angel+Cherri: AAAAAAAH!
Sir Pentious: HAAAAAAA!
Sharly: RAAAAAAAH!
Y/n: HAHAHAAAAA!
Charlie+Katie+Tom: AAAAAAH!
All: AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!