Kabanata 26
MY MOUTH PARTED, mabilis kong tinakbo si Ejercito at ibinaba ang takip niya sa bibig.
"L-Lena..." he called, shocked.
Napuno ng pag-aalala ang puso ko at mabilis na lumuhod para tanggalin ang tali sa kanyang kamay.
"Okay ka lang? Are you hurt?" I asked hurriedly, pilit na tinatanggal ang tali sa kanyang kamay.
"No," He sounded confused. "You?"
"I'm fine," I said, halos nanginginig ang kamay para matanggal ang kanyang tali. Nang makalas ko ito ay mabilis na tinanggal ko rin ang sa paa niya.
"What are you doing here, Lena? Bakit ka napunta rito?" He asked, worried too.
Napasinghap ako, mabilis na tinanggal ang tali sa paa niya at nang makawala siya ng tuluyan ay walang pagdadalawang-isip na inatake siya para sa mahigpit na yakap.
He gasped, mariing napapikit ako at napahikbi nang maramdaman ko ang marahan niyang paghaplos sa likod ko.
"Harriet," he whispered.
"I-I'm worried! Akala ko may nangyaring masama sa 'yo!" I gasped and hugged him tightly, I gripped his shirt, ibinaon ko ang mukha ko sa kanyang dibdib at narinig ko ang mabilis niyang paghinga.
"I'm fine, nothing happened to me." He whispered softly.
"I-I thought..." my voice broke, naramdaman ko ang pag-hawak niya sa baywang ko at ang marahang paglayo.
I looked at him and saw him lifting me slowly to sit on the chair where he is tied. Lumuhod siya sa harapan ko at sinapo ang pisngi ko.
"Don't cry, I'm alright." He mumbled gently.
Pumikit ako at sumandal sa kamay niyang nasa pisngi ko, mahina akong humikbi at naramdaman ko ang masuyong pagpalis niya ng luha sa pisngi ko.
"I-I'm sorry..." I whispered. "I'm really sorry, Jer..."
I opened my eye and saw me sniffing. Nakita ko ang pag-igting ng panga niya habang tinatanggal ang luha sa pisngi ko, tila galit sa pag-iyak ko.
"Stop crying," he whispered softly. "Ayokong umiiyak ka."
"I'm sorry..." bulong ko pang muli.
"Sinong nagdala sa 'yo rito?" He asked me when I slowly calmed down, tinulungan ko siya sa pag-alis ng luha at sinuklay ang buhok ko gamit ang daliri ko.
"I-I'm sorry, it's Cess..." I murmured.
Napatitig sa akin si Jer at mamaya ay biglang natawa.
"That woman," he shook his head. "And where's your asshole friend?"
"H-Huh?"
"Where's the fucking Floyd?" he asked, annoyed. Umawang ang labi ko at pinagmasdan siya bago umiling.
"I don't know, I haven't seen him with Cecille. Si Cess ang nagdala sa akin dito."
"Pinagtulungan nila ako," he scoffed and my mouth parted, remembering how he was tied in the chair!
"K-Kaya ka nila?" I asked in shock.
"I was annoyed and confused because Floyd keeps on trying to tie my hand earlier! Akala ko nagbibiro lang." He scoffed.
"Kanina ka pa nawawala..."
"Yes, your asshole of a friend did that! Sinapak ko na nga kasi ang gulo nila ni Cecille, Cess asked if kung tatalian ba raw nila ako ay makakawala ako?"
"Damn it, Cess!" I groaned, realizing it was their evil scheme!
"Then suddenly, she vanished, biglang bumalik at nagsisisigaw na nawawala ka raw. I p-panicked," he cleared his throat and I bit my lip.
"Sumunod ako, nagmamadali. Cecille is a hell of an actress! Dapat nag-artista na lang iyon dahil dalang-dala ako!" reklamo niya. "Tumapat ako sa kwarto and Floyd came from nowhere and fucking let me sleep."
"P-Paano?" I asked.
"They made me smell something," ngiwi niya.
Napapikit ako ng mariin at napailing bago siya pinagmasdan.
"Ayos ka lang ba? Baka nakakahilo 'yong pinaamoy nila sa 'yo, are you dizzy?" I asked him worriedly and lifted his face to check for any scratches.
Nag-antay ako ng sagot sa kanya pero tagong ngiti lang ang nakita ko.
"Jer," I murmured.
"Huh? Uhm, yeah." He swallowed hard. "I'm good, I should ask you that since you cried."
"Ayos lang ako," I murmured. "I'm sorry if I was overreacting and cried, I-I was just worried."
"I'm fine, hmm?" He lifted his hand and placed my hair behind my ear.
"Paano ba naman kasi, Cess told me I should hurry habang buhay ka pa!" I hissed.
He froze then suddenly laughed, shaking his head.
"That woman, now I know why she's so weird today." He shook his head. "I mean, dati pa siyang weirdo but she's in the maximum level now."
"Kasi may kakampi! Si Floyd!" I scoffed.
He chuckled a bit and nodded, muli niyang tinanggal ang luha sa pisngi ko na medyo natuyo na rin naman.
"Ayos lang ako," bulong ko at ngumiti. "Salamat."
Tumango siya't nakitaan ko ng kaginhawaan sa mga mata. Nang tumayo siya mula sa pagkakaluhod ay sumulyap siya sa madilim na kwarto. I stood, humawak ako sa kanyang braso at mabilis niyang kinuha ang kamay ko sa braso niya paalis.
My heart hurt, akala ko'y galit siya sa ginawa ko pero ibinaba niya lang ang kamay ko para hawakan kaya bumilis ang kalabog ng puso ko.
I lifted my gaze at him and my heart pounded more.
"What are we gonna do, then?" he asked.
Sa siwang ng liwanag ay kita ko ang suot niyang damit, he's wearing a black shirt, jacket and maong pants.
"We can check the door?" I whispered.
Sumulyap siya sa akin at tumango kaya nanguna na akong maglakad habang hawak ang kamay niya at sinubukang pihitin ang seradura ng pinto pero hindi ko mabuksan.
Bumitaw ako kay Jer nang subukan niyang buksan ang pintuan pero bigo siya. I looked around the room and noticed it was a concrete one, may maliit na siwang nga lang kaya may liwanag pa rin kahit papano sa sa kwarto. Mukhang storage room ata ito.
Jer tried to force the door but to no avail, he couldn't.
I sighed, napailing ako roon at nang wala talagang nangyari ay lumapit ako at marahang inabot ang braso niya.
"It's alright, let's not force it."
He looked at me and I saw his forehead creased.
"No, you have to go out here." He said, "You can't sleep in this dirty room."
I looked around and noticed it was quite dirty but...it's alright.
"It's tolerable," I murmured.
"Baka may lamok," aniya.
"Ayos lang,"
"Paano kapag may ipis? It is a storage room, there's probably some cockroach here, I know you hate it so much."
Humalukipkip ako roon at tinitigan siya.
"Ganoon mo ba ako ayaw makasama rito?" I asked quietly.
Mabilis namang napailing siya, nanlalaki ang mata.
"I-I just thought you can't stand being alone here with me." He whispered.
Nagkatinginan kaming dalawa at ako na ang tumikhim at humugot ng lakas ng loob para magsalita.
"I was never afraid of being alone with you," I said. "And I want to talk to you, that's if...you want to talk to me."
Nanatili siyang nakatitig, tila naninimbang sa reaksyon.
"S-Sorry, kasi...hindi ko natawagan ang secretary mo para sana sa meeting." I said weakly. "I-I know you're busy to talk to me, pero gusto ko sanang magbakasakali kung...may oras ka.
Tumitig ako sa kanyang nakasandal sa pintuan at pinagmamasdan ako.
"'Yon ay kung gusto mo, I mean, I will understand kung ayaw mo akong kausapin pero...sana pagbigyan mo ako."
He just looked at me, his brow raised a bit and licked his lower lip.
"Gaano mo ako kagusto?" He asked.
"Huh?" I blinked.
"I mean, kausapin. Gaano mo ako kagusto kausapin?" He asked and cleared his throat.
I puffed a breath and looked at him in the eye.
"Sobra...sobrang-sobra." I murmured and place my hand together and looked at him. "Please?"
He stared at me for a while, kita kong tinitignan ang reaksyon ko kaya halos magpaawa ako.
"Please, Jer? Please..." I murmured genly/
He looked at me and a smile plastered my face when he nodded and clicked his tongue.
"Kailan ba kita natiis?" He murmured kaya napangisi ako roon.
"Thank you!" I cheered. Nasa punto na akong gusto na siyang talunin para mayakap pero pinigilan ko ang sarili at baka masyado akong mabilis.
He nodded and smiled a bit, naglakad siya papunta kung saan at pinagmasdan ko lang siya. He seemed to be looking for something hanggang sa nakita kong may nahanap siyang lampara.
"May pang-ilaw ka ba?" tanong ko pero nang makitang may hawak na siyang posporo doon sa tabi ng nakitang lampara ay hindi na ako nangulit.
He lit it and placed it somewhere near us to give light to the room, mabuti na lang rin at malamig ang gabi, may pumapasok na hangin rin sa siwang sa may kisame kaya hindi kami namroblema sa init.
Nakatayo lang ako sa likuran niya habang may inaayos siya. Hawak ko ang kamay ko, I keep on pinching my fingers to stop myself from being too nervous to talk to him.
It's my time now, to prove to him my love...kahit na mukhang impossibleng maramdaman niya sa kabila ng mga nagawa ko.
"We can sit here," he said, showing me the side of the room where we can rest.
I nodded and took a glance, nakita kong nilinis niya ang parte na 'yon at naglatag ng karton para upuan.
"Thank you," I said softly. He nodded, inilahad niya ang kamay kaya tinanggap ko iyon at marahang umupo.
Hindi pa siya natinag, nagtanggal pa siya ng kalat roon at pinagmasdan ko lang siya ng tahimik.
"Naghapunan ka na?" I asked him.
He nodded, bahagyang sumulyap sa akin at kinuha ang karton na malaki sa may tabi ko at inilayo.
Hindi na rin siya nagsalita pagkatapos, he gave me dinner earlier before he was gone, pagkatapos ko kumain ay nag-asikaso ako ng pagkain ng volunteers kaya hindi ko kaagad siya napansing nawawala.
When he was done, I saw him stared at me briefly before clearing this throat.
"Can I sit beside you?" He asked.
"Yes!" I nodded. "Oo naman."
He nodded, marahang lumapit sa akin kaya bahagya akong umusog para bigyan siya ng pwesto sa tabi ko.
Our shoulders touched, I felt shivers all over. Nagkatinginan kami roon at kaagad na kumalabog ang puso ko.
Baka dahil sa lamig lang iyan, Lena!
Umayos siya ng upo, niyakap ko ang tuhod ko at sumulyap sa kanyang mas determinado ngayon.
"So..." he started and glanced at me.
Pinalobo ko naman ang bibig para kumuha ng hangin bago huminga ng malalim.
"I...just wanted to apologize." I started. "Doon sa nakaraan, 'yong kay Augustine..."
He looked at me briefly, his jaw clenched a bit but then didn't even comment.
"I walked out from your mansion kasi akala ko ay may relasyon kayo ni Emily." I explained.
"She isn't my girlfriend, Leona." He said timidly.
"I know," I nodded and hugged my knees tighter.
"Nasa utak ko no'n kasi ay...kung sakaling kayo nga, ayokong makasira ng relasyon. I left because of that...and I was hurt and jealous." I whispered.
He looked at me, confusion was now visible on his eyes.
"Why are you...jealous?" he murmured.
Mas nagwala ang puso ko sa tanong niya, pinisil ko ang daliri ko bago sumulyap sa kanya at kumuha ng lakas ng loob.
"Because...I'm in love with you...still." Maliit na boses na sabi ko.
He stopped, as if I've said something that shocked him. Nanlaki ang mata niya ng bahagya at umawang ang labi sa narinig mula sa akin.
"I walked out because of this jealousy, tapos pumunta muna ako kina Cess. Pag-uwi ko no'ng gabi ay naroon si Augustine."
Mukha pa siyang hindi nakakarecover at tulala pa rin sa akin.
"Si August, anak ng family friend nina Mamá. He's my friend too and we got close. I only treated him like a friend and nothing else."
"He kissed you," he said stiffly, kumunot na ang noo at nasa akin ang buong atensyon.
"I didn't know that, matagal na niyang sinasabing gusto niya ako and I keep on telling him that I only see him as a friend."
"But he kissed you," ulit pa niya, mukhang 'yon ang ikinagagalit.
"That night, he confessed again, saying he wanted to try his chance and I said no, I told him I don't like him like...that. Na h'wag umasa sa sagot ko."
"And he forced you?"
"Not really but he said he wanted to try his chance kahit wala. Hinatid ko siya sa sasakyan dahil aalis na siya then I didn't expect him to kiss me." Nanatili siyang nakatitig sa akin roon.
"I-I was mad, I admit because you two fought, hindi ko 'yon gusto, na mag-aaway kayo dahil lang sa akin."
"Hindi 'yon 'lang' lang, Lena." He answered, annoyed.
"Yes it is, sino ba naman ako para pag-awayan?" I pursed my lips.
"You're Lena!" He insisted.
"No! I'm no one, hindi ako deserve para pag-awayan. Nagalit ako sa 'yo kasi nakipag-away ka, nadala siguro ako ng emosyon at nasabi ko 'yon, lalo na no'ng naisip na kayo ni Emily, she was there when I left you."
"We met at the law school, nothing more, Lena. She's my colleague, I'm ahead of her, I'm her senior." He explained.
"Pero kasama mo siya no'ng reunion," maliit ko sinabi, muling naalala ang sakit na naramdaman no'ng araw na iyon.
"She wanted to join and I do too, kapag pumunta akong mag-isa, anong gagawin ko roon? Tutunganga sa 'yo at mamatay sa selos?" He gritted his teeth. My mouth parted.
"I thought you moved on," I countered.
"That's the funniest thing you've said today." Ngiwi niya at ngumuso ako.
"That's it for that...and now, I wanted to apologize for what I did to you in the past." I whispered.
I felt the serious, dark aura inside, kung kinakabahan na ako sa pinag-usapan namin kanina, mas grabe ang kaba ko ngayon.
Sumulyap ako sa kanya at napansing nakatitig na lang siya kung saan at malalim ang paghinga.
"I wanted to get this off my chest but I wanted to say that I truly loved you, I've never loved anyone that much but you. I don't know if you'll believe me...if you'll ever believe that love I have for you." Nangilid ang luha ko roon kaya mas pinisil ko ang daliri ko.
"You said you're tired of me," he said in a low, lonely voice. "You said you loved Floyd more."
"I lied," my breath hitched. "I-I know about your offer in Cambridge, that you passed Harvard."
Napatingin siya kaagad sa akin, gulat.
"Y-You knew?"
I slowly nodded.
"Yes. I knew that you passed the exam. I felt it, you are smart, Ejercito. You passed the exam."
Napatitig siya sa akin at hindi nagsalita.
"I also know that you won't accept the offer because of me, because you didn't want to leave me here."
Napapikit siya ng mariin at umigting ang panga.
"You didn't tell me..."
"Because I know you won't go there if I knew," I insisted. "Alam kong pipilitin mo akong hindi ka pupunta, ayokong mawala ka pero mas ayokong mawala ang pangarap mo dahil sa akin."
"You...broke up with me because of that?" kumunot ang noo niya at mas naging iritado.
"Yes," bulong ko. "I-I don't know any other way to make you go, study and live your dream. I got no choice."
"That's bullshit, Leona!" His voice raised.
"I don't want you to choose! I know you're struggling! Na-ospital ang Dad mo, your mother is stressed...ayokong pahirapan ka, ayokong pumili ka." iling kong marahas.
"They talked to you, haven't they?"
"Yes," I murmured. Napuno ng iritasyon ang kanyang mga mata't dumilim.
"I fucking knew it!" He cursed, enraged now.
"Hindi nila ako pinilit, Jer. They never forced me to make a decision, I decided what I did by myself, no one else." I murmured.
"That decision is stupid, Lena!"
"No, it's not! If I didn't do that, maybe you're still here with me! The opportunity for you to be what you are today might be gone!"
"I can be successful without studying there!" He exclaimed.
"I know pero iba ang makapag-aral doon, that was your dream, Jer! Ayokong magbabase ka sa desisyon ko, I wanted you to succeed in the profession you always wanted! I never want to see you depending on my decision! If you want to be a lawyer, you will be! I won't cage you with me!"
"You are not caging me, Leona!"
"I am!" I exclaimed. "I can feel it, your love for me is caging you! You discarded your dreams because of me, noong nagsulat tayo ng gusto nating maging pagkagraduate dati...you said you wanted to be what I want when I graduate, ang sabi mo, kung saan ako ay doon ka...ayoko no'n."
"Ayaw mo akong makasama?" rumahan ang boses niya, punong-puno ng sakit.
"I want to be with you but I want you to get the dream you've always wanted! Ayokong mawala ang pangarap mo dahil lang sa estupidang babae katulad ko!"
"Your decision might be stupid but you are not stupid, Leona Harriet!"
"I am! I make stupid decisions! I am naíve! I am a fool, I've hurt you! Lahat ng masamang gawin ay pinaramdam ko sa 'yo! I am worthless compared to you! You have a bright future ahead of you at ayokong makulong ka sa akin! Ayokong baliwalain mo ang iyong pangarap dahil lang sa akin!"
"That's just plain stupid." He gritted his teeth.
"You have a dream before me! Bago mo pa ako makilala, may gusto kang marating at ayokong mabalewala ang bagay na 'yon dahil lang dumating ako! I am toxic to you, Jer!"
He shook his head and pulled his hair frustratedly.
"I always believe you will be successful, Jer. Kahit anong sabihin nila, alam kong magiging successful ka." My voice broke and sighed heavily to stop myself from being too emotional.
"I can't believe I got mad just for this! Nagalit ako sa walang kwentang bagay, Lena!" He scoffed, frustration was written all over his face.
Muling napasuklay siya sa buhok at sinapo ang mukha.
"What? It's your dream, Jer! How can't that be important?!" I exclaimed, tuluyan nang nahulog ang mga luha.
"Damn, being with you is the only dream I had!" He exclaimed, stopping me.
My tears fell more, nakita ko ang pagkabigo sa mga mata niya nang makita akong umiiyak. Umiling ako at hinawi ang luha ko.
"N-No...your dreams are important."
"You are far more important than those stupid dreams." He scoffed.
"I-It's not stupid, that's your dream!" Singhap ko pa at marahas na umiling.
"Fuck, I was fucking frustrated for nothing! I spent my years trying to deserve you! I keep on telling myself to be successful for you! Para maipagmalaki mo ako!" He looked at me again and noticed his bloodshot eyes.
He did his best to keep calm yet his eyes are telling him otherwise. His jaw clenched. He was biting his lower lip.
"I-I wanted to apologize for my reckless decisions," I said softly, pilit na hinawi ang luha na patuloy na nalalaglag sa pisngi.
"I am sorry for all the things I did, for making a decision alone, without you. For hurting you, for breaking your heart. I'm really sorry, Jer, kasi ang sama-sama ko..."
Lumalim ang paghinga n'ya at nakita kong kumuyom ang palad niya.
"My reasons might not be valid and reckless but I just want to say," sumulyap ako sa kanya at inabot ang kamay niya bago marahang hinaplos.
"I wanted to say that I am so...so proud of you." Bulong ko habang nakatitig sa mga mata niya. "Kahit masakit, kahit nagkalayo tayo, kahit magulo. I am so proud of what you've become today."
One by one, I caught his tears fell and my hand immediately caught his tear from his cheek and shook my head.
"No, Jer. H'wag mo akong iyakan, I don't deserve it..."
"Y-Your decision is stupid," he whispered weakly. "Lena, i-it's stupid..."
"I know...I know." I whispered with my breaking voice, muli kong hinaplos ang pisngi niya at hinawi ang luha niya.
He closed his eyes and rested his face on my palm, malalim pa rin ang paghinga at mukhang pagod.
"When you say that you don't deserve me? That's wrong, it is me that don't deserve such fine, amazing and beautiful man as you."
"T-That's bullshit, Leona Harriet." bulong pa niya panlaban, nakapikit pa rin.
"The pain that I inflicted to you was severe, I know it left a mark in your heart. I am so sorry, kung p'wede lang kunin lahat ng sakit na nararamdaman mo ginawa ko na, kung p'wede lang pawiin lahat ng luha mo, ginawa ko na pero alam kong impossible na dahil matagal ng tapos."
He breathed deeply and tightened his jaw.
"I am so, so proud of you. Kapag nakikita kita sa dyaryo? Sa mga kasong naisasara mo? Sobrang-sobrang saya ko, that's what I envisioned you'd become, a successful man. That's my only dream for you too, Jer, for you to be successful despite what the people are saying."
"Masaya naman na ako noon kahit ikaw lang ang naniniwala sa kakayahan ko," he opened his eyes and stared at me. "Their opinions never mattered because what I look up to is when you always believe of what I am capable of."
His lips quivered.
"Your opinion of me is what mattered the most, as long as you believe I can, I am happy and contented."
I nodded slowly and smiled at him.
"I am so, so proud of you, my love." I whispered. "I-I don't deserve you but I want you to know that I love you so much...na naging mahirap rin sa akin na magkalayo tayo."
"I keep on imagining what it's like to be with you during your tough days, s-siguro magkasama tayo palagi? Sa halip na nagrereview ka sa bar exam ay naghaharutan lang tayo? Baka tumaba na ako ng sobra dahil palagi mo akong pinapakain ng marami?"
Despite his tears, he laughed softly, shaking his head. Hinawi niya ang luha ko at hinaplos ang pisngi ko.
"That's definitely what might happen," iling niya.
I licked my lip and tried calming myself, I sighed hard. Natahimik kami sandali habang kinakalma ang mga sarili, pinipilit na maging maayos para makapag-usap ng matino.
I dried my tears and he did too, sinuklay niya ang buhok niya at huminga ng malalim.
"I looked like an idiot whenever I cry like a crybaby." Reklamo niya.
"It's cute," I murmured softly kaya napatingin siya sa akin.
"It's not that manly," he whispered. Nangiti ako at umiling.
"I love you," I said, staring at him. I noticed how his eyes twinkled at that, pilit na nagseseryoso pero nabakas ko ang pamumula ng mukha niya.
"Lena..." he whispered.
"You proved me a lot of times how much you love me. I lost count, college pa lang tayo alam ko na sa sarili ko na ikaw lang ang gugustuhin ko sa buhay na 'to." He remained quiet and just stared at me pero kitang-kita ko ang pamumula niya.
Nahihiya din ako pero desidido akong may magawa ngayong nabigyan kami ng pagkakataon na mag-usap ng tadhana...I mean Cess and Floyd.
"Now, I know it sounds silly but I wanted to prove my love to you this time." I confessed.
Namilog ang mata niya't napaayos ng upo.
"You really don't need to prove it—"
"I will," I cut him off.
"But Lena—"
"Let me, Ejercito." I whispered. "Kasi ako...pakiramdam ko ay wala akong kwenta kumpara sa 'yo, that I don't deserve the undying love you have for me."
"Stop saying something ill about yourself." Sumimangot siya.
"I'm not," I said. "Just...I feel so useless, parang ang kulang-kulang ng ginawa ko."
"Your decision is definitely stupid, Leona, but you sacrificed a lot." Kumunot ang noo niya.
"Pero sinaktan kita," I pointed out. "I am a bitch for doing that!"
"Stop saying that word! Hindi ka ganyan." Mas nairita siya sa akin.
"I am! Imagine, I pushed you away, I hurt you. Hinayaan kitang malugmok at sinisisi ang sarili mo, na iniisip kung anong kulang sa 'yo. I let you soak alone in rain while carrying the ring for me!"
He froze, umawang ang labi niya sa akin.
"You...came?" He asked.
Napatitig ako sa kanya at marahang tumango, nagsisisi.
"Yes...I was about to come to you, to take back everything I've said pero naisip ko, kung pupuntahan kita, paano na ang pangarap mo? If I showed myself to you and accepted the marriage you're offering, mas lalakas ang loob mong suwayin ang magulang mo."
"That's honestly another stupid decision, Leona!" Kumunot ang noo niya. "I make up my mind, kailangan mo talagang bumawi sa akin."
"That's what I'm saying! See, I'm a bitch!"
"If you showed yourself and accepted me, I could've just stole you from them! Kung nakita kita, sinasabi ko sa 'yo, Leona Harriet, wala akong pakialam at itatanan kita!"
Nanlaki ang mata ko sa sinabi niya at hinampas siya.
"Ejercito!"
"What?!" He groaned. "At isa pang sabing bitch ka, Leona, hahalikan kita rito!"
My eyes widen exaggeratedly, napasulyap ako sa madilim na kwarto paharap sa kanya na nakasimangot sa akin.
"Don't you dare..." I hissed.
"Make it up to me, hindi ako natutuwa sa sinabi mo." Ngumuso siya at iginalaw ang leeg.
"Okay, liligawan kita!" I said and his emotion vanished, napatitig siya sa akin at mamaya pa ay humagalpak na ng tawa sa harapan ko.
"Fuck?" He laughed again. "I know your decisions are quite stupid but not to that extent!"
Habang tumatawa siya doon ay sumimangot ako at humalukipkip, pinagmamasdan siyang parang nabibilaukan na sa kakatawa.
"Liligawan raw ako..." bulong niya at tumawa na naman.
My lips protruded, pinagmasdan lang siya hanggang sa tumigil siya at napasulyap sa akin.
His smile vanished when he saw how serious I am while staring at him.
"S-Seryoso, Harriet?" He noticed my face.
"Do I look like I'm joking?" I asked, annoyed.
His mouth parted, napahawak siya sa bibig niya at gulat akong pinagmasdan.
"S-Seriously?" He asked again. "I'm quite choosy,"
I rolled my eyes at him.
"Kapag nililigawan mo ako, palagi akong manghihingi ng kiss!" Panakot pa niya sa akin kaya ngumiwi ako.
"Hindi nanghahalik kapag ganoon," I said, my forehead creasing. "Wala pang relasyon, dapat kalmado."
"Iba nga sa akin," aniya. "Agressive dapat."
"Ewan ko sa 'yo, Sandejas." Ngiwi ko at maya-maya pa'y ngumisi siya.
"Simula na ba 'yon ngayong gabi?" He asked.
"Huh? 'Yong ano?"
"Panliligaw mo? Fuck, ganito talaga ako ka-gwapo, Harriet? Para ligawan mo? Ganito ka ka-patay na patay sa akin?" Tawa niya.
"Baka gusto mong ikaw patayin ko?" I hissed pero humagalpak lang siya at ihinilamos ang kamay sa mukha niya.
"Shit, I can't believe this..." He cursed. "Grabe pala talaga itong alindog ko, Harriet—"
"Ayan na naman siya, you're too full of yourself." Sita ko.
"Sinong hindi?" He asked. "Beauty queen ang nanliligaw sa akin!"
Bigla akong natawa sa pagbibida niya doon, tila hindi umiyak sa pagkamangha niya.
"Bukas na ako manliligaw, napapagod na ako kakaiyak." I announced at doon siya napasulyap ng tuluyan sa akin.
"You wanna sleep now?" He asked. Tumango at humikab.
He sighed and licked his lip, nagitla ako nang humarap siya sa akin at sinuklay ang buhok ko gamit ang daliri niya at inayos ang ponytail ko.
"Naiinitan ka? Maybe I can find a way out, are you thirsty?" He asked.
"I'm fine," I whispered and smiled. "Let's rest, I know you had a long day too."
He nodded slowly then I watched him when he started walking around the room. Marahan akong sumandal sa pader at sumulyap sa kanya.
"What are you doing?" I asked.
"Baka nag-iwan sila ng tubig rito," He said, looking around and then cursed suddenly.
"What? Why?" I asked, sinilip siya sa may pintuan.
Maya-maya'y bumalik na may hawak na bote ng tubig kaya umawang ang labi ko.
"How..."
"They really did plan this well," He snorted then went closer, binuksan niya ang tubig at naupo sa tabi ko bago ito inabot.
Kaagad akong uminom at ibinigay sa kanya ang tira na ininuman niya din at itinabi pagkatapos.
"Jer?" I suddenly called when I saw him removing his jacket and placing it on my leg.
"Hmm?" He hummed and fixed it on my leg. "Baka malamok mamaya."
"Thank you," I whispered, a small smile creeping back on my lips.
Tumitig siya sa akin at marahang tumango. He placed my hair behind my ear then slowly rested his back on the wall.
"Basta ikaw," he whispered back, marahang hinawakan niya ako pasandal sa kanyang dibdib at huminga ng malalim bago ako ilapit sa kanyang katawan.
We are both quiet now, nawala ang antok ko sa katahimikang iyon kaya napaisip ako.
I suddenly thought of reading something funny somewhere kaya ngumisi ako at tinawag ang atensyon niya.
"Jer?"
"Hmm?" He hummed and played with the tip of my hair.
"Naniniwala ka sa reincarnation?" I asked him.
"Huh? Maybe? I don't know, why is it so random?" He asked, confused.
I chuckled, nagtataka siya nang lumayo ako sa harapan niya at pinagmasdan siya.
"Ako naniniwala," I said at mas nagtaka siya doon.
"Alam kong baliw ako, Lena, pero bakit parang ikaw na rin?" He asked. Natawa ako at tinapik siya.
"Naniniwala ako sa reincarnation, kasi dati akong katipunera na namatay sa gyera..."
"Itulog mo na 'yan," natatawa na siya sa akin.
"At ngayon ay nagbabalik, para ipaglaban ka." I said smoothly and winked. His jaw dropped.