Chapter 24 - Ripping the heads off small, fluffy, Cute Creatures
Patience couldn’t look at Josh. She didn’t want to see the lust in his eyes as he took in his future wife. Sure he might have fought the whole marriage thing but that was before he knew he had Miss Italian Barbie Bratz doll to warm his bed. She could feel her heart breaking and the walls of this huge empty restaurant closing in on her.
“It’s so good to see you Holly, you look beautiful. Doesn’t she look beautiful Joshua?”
Josh mumbled something in return but Patience’s heart was thumping too loud to catch it.
“Have a seat Holly,” Mr C continued, “Next to Joshua, lovely, lovely.”
Patience’s hands gripped the handkerchief in her lap and twisted. She wanted to hurt someone, rip their heads off and dance naked in their blood. She had never been one to turn to violence but Patience now had a strong desire to commit mass murder. Yes, she sincerely doubted that she would regret the passing of anyone in this room. They all deserved to die a slow and very painful death.
“Holly,” Mr C seemed oblivious to Patience’s murderous thoughts, “There has been a small complication so we are going to have to move the wedding forward, will there be a problem with that?”
“That’s fine Mr Camerota, I can handle that.” Patience could hear the smile in her answer and she wondered if she would still be smiling when she rammed the stiletto heel of her Jimmy Choo’s into her eye socket.
Complication, the words registered, Mr C said there was a complication. What small complication? Patience closed her eyes and wondered if he was referring to her. So her being in love with Josh was a ‘small complication’. He was pulling the wedding forward so she didn’t embarrass Josh. She scrunched her eyes closed and she ground her teeth as the handkerchief began to fray.
“I don’t want to...” Josh’s quiet voice faded to nothing.
“Is something wrong Joshua?” Holly’s gentle voice cut Patience to the quick. “Can I call you Josh? I understand that’s what your friends call you?”
Patience couldn’t help but glance over as Holly reached over to gently rest a hand on his arm. Her heart lurched and she balled her fist against both the pain crushing her chest and the impulse to rip Holly’s hand off Josh, break all of her manicured fingers and ruin her designer dress by throwing her WWE style to the floor so she could rub her perfect face into the carpet. Patience quickly focused back on the handkerchief she was shredding on her lap. She missed Josh’s reply but heard Holly giggle again. The cotton released a tearing sound as it became two separate pieces of cloth.
“As you know Joshua, Holly will be your guest at the Party tonight and I have arranged costumes for the three of you.”
Three of us? Patience couldn’t help the sneer that she scoffed.
“Patience isn’t going,” Josh’s voice wasn’t much more than a whisper, “She’s not going to the party.”
How convenient for him not to have me there, Patience thought as her teeth clenched together. He was already trying to get her out of the way, unbelievable! What did she expect? He was a boy. He probably said what he needed to say to get her V-card and now something better was on offer.
The need for violence evaporated and now all she wanted to do was scream at him. In her head she started composing her rant. Yes, she would tell him, in no uncertain terms, where he could shove his love and if it didn’t fit then she would be more than happy to encourage it with whatever means necessary - cricket bat, sledge hammer, wreaking ball... - ok, so maybe the need for violence hadn’t entirely evaporated.
“Of course Petal will attend!” Mr C was saying, “The party is partly in her honour, she has to go.”
“Ohh yes, you must come!” Holly chirped.
Patience jaw was still firmly clenched and she knew that if she released it to disagree she wouldn’t be able to shut it. So instead she shook her head.
“Petal you will attend, I have gone to the trouble of arranging your costume and your birthday surprise so I won’t take no for an answer.”
“And it’s going to be so much fun! I can’t wait until you see the dress,” Holly was smiling again, her wide eyes so innocent and trusting.
Patience lifted her head to tell Mr C that there was no way in hell that she would go and to unleash her wraith on Josh, but as she did she saw Holly leaning into Josh. Even though his face was downcast, they looked like a couple. They looked good together, both beautiful, they looked like they belonged together.
Patience’s mouth moved but no words came out. There was no point. It wasn’t going to change anything. It was really happening. All week they had talked about it and made plans but it was never real. It was never really going to happen. But now, now his fiancé was sitting next to him and she was on the other side of the table. It was over. He was going to marry Holly and there was nothing she could do about it. The dreamlike euphoria of being in love burst like the fragile bubble that it was. Tears budded in her eyes. An overwhelming weight bore down on her as her broken heart shattered into a thousand pieces. Her throat constricted and she fought to breathe. She had to get out of here, now!
“I’m sorry I have to go,” she managed to say as she jumped to her feet, her chair falling backwards as she did and the bundle of frayed cotton fell to the floor leaving only the odd clinging threat stuck to her jeans. She couldn’t look up to see their expressions, she didn’t want to hear their words, she just wanted to get out of here. With her head down she twisted away from the table and hurried in the direction she hoped the door was.
“Patience?” she heard Josh call after her but she didn’t stop.
What did stop her in her tracks was Carlos who stood like a sentry in front of the door.
“Petal, come back and sit down.”
“Let me out please,” Patience hiccupped at the sculptured abs that were pressed into her face.
“Petal, please return to the table.” Mr C sounded like he was coming to the end of his short fuse.
“No,” she croaked through the tears. “You don’t command me Mr Camerota. I am leaving, so move your gorilla so that I can pass. You don’t need me here. No one needs me here.”
“Patience, don’t leave please,” Josh’s voice was strained.
“I’m in the way Josh. I don’t want to be in the way. Good luck with your wedding.”
“Don’t be silly Petal,” Marcus’ voice was calm, too calm.
“Please just let me go,” Patience squeaked at the wall of muscle that stood between her and escape.
“I hope I haven’t done anything to upset her,” there was no malice in the soft voice, just concern.
“I’ll speak to her,” Marcus said in a reassuring voice, “Why don’t you and Joshua get to know one another.”
With this another small sob forced its way out of Patience and she pushed against the mountain named Carlos, “I want to go! Let me go, I promise that I won’t get in the way. He’ll never see me again. I’ll stay away. I won’t be a complication.”
“No!” Josh’s voice rang out. “No! I won’t let you go. I won’t let you leave Patience.”
“I can’t Josh. I can’t do this,” she rested her forehead on Carlos’ washboard chest and let her tears drip off her nose onto his black shirt. Carlos was obviously unsure what to do in this situation because his stance softened a little and one arm shifted as if he was going to hold her as she wept into him.
“Don’t touch her!” Josh growled and Patience felt the arm move back to Carlos’ side.
“What are you doing son?”
Patience turned to find Josh walking away from Holly towards her. He was going to drag her back to the table. He was going to make her humiliation complete. He was going to make her watch this, to make her suffer through every second of this. So she kissed Jake and didn’t tell him. So she had probably seduced him this morning but she didn’t know when she was born. So she had messed the whole thing up. But that still didn’t justify this. Surely he wasn’t going to torture her now?
“I won’t let you leave Patience,” he said as he pulled her away from Carlos.
“No Josh! Don’t do this to me. I’m sorry. I’m sorry that I did everything wrong. It’s my fault that you are in this situation but please don’t make me see this.”
“Your fault? Yes, that’s probably true, but really I didn’t stand a chance. From the moment I realised that girls were meant for more than climbing trees and teasing I was yours. I suffered for years thinking I would never have you and I refuse to suffer again. I’m not prepared to lose you now that I finally have you.” He pulled her into his chest and wrapped his arms around her.
“I love you Dad and I respect you,” Josh’s voice had never sounded so firm, so resolved, so mature, so sexy, “but I am not going to do what you want me to do. I am eighteen and I want to be a man, I want to be Patience’s man. My love for her has given me the strength to make my own decisions. I don’t care what you do to me, slice off my testicles, make a Popsicle out of my sperm, chop me up and mail the pieces to every corner of the globe. I don’t care because nothing you could do would hurt as much as watching Patience walk away from me.”
“He’s very dramatic isn’t he,” Holly said calmly, “Although, I know your education system is a little narrow minded in this country, but doesn’t he know that the globe is round and therefore has no corners?”
“Do you think I should have sent him to a private school on the continent?” Mr C asked Holly with a slight note of humour in his voice.
“I don’t think you understand me,” Josh stood taller as he pulled back from Patience but held her hand firmly, “Holly, I’m sure you are a very nice person but I don’t love you. You deserve someone who will love you back. So I’m sorry Holly but I’m not going to marry you.”
“That’s not good enough,” Mr C said back to him. “I’m not accepting that.”
“I don’t care what you will or will not accept,” Josh said quickly with not a hint of fear in his voice, “I love Patience and if she will have an idiot like me then she’s the only one I will marry. Patience will you marry me for real this time? Will you be my wife?”
“Yes, yes, of course Josh. Of course I will,” Patience’s face was a wash of tears.
“About bloody time,” Mr C laughed, “I thought he would never get that out.”
“Look at the time Marcus! We are going to have to hurry if we’re going to be ready in time.”
“But... but... you don’t understand.” Josh looked confused at his father in confusion before turning to Patience. “I mean it Patience. I love you. I don’t care what he does to me I won’t let you walk out of my life. I won’t marry anyone but you.”
“Josh,” Patience threw herself around him and they held each other.
“Come on son, Holly will have to perform a miracle as it is.”
“That’s fine Marcus, miracles are my speciality. Come with me Patience, I can’t wait until you see the dress! It’s going to be perfect.”
Carlos wrapped and arm around Josh and then he was gone. He was fighting Carlos but it was as effective as a fly fighting a bulldozer. He bundled Josh out of the restaurant and into the waiting limo before Patience could react.
Marcus kissed her shocked cheek and smiled at her, “You two were almost impossible but I knew this would work.”
“What? What. What!” Patience yelled after him but the limo door closed and it drove off with no further explanations.
Patience threw herself against the door of the restaurant but it didn’t budge. She tugged and pulled and screamed in frustration but it was locked tight.
“We don’t really have time for that,” Holly’s voice came from behind her. Patience whipped around to find her laying out a white dress on one of the empty tables.
“You have got to be joking! Give me one reason why I shouldn’t rip your hair extensions out and ram them up your nose!”
“Because we have to get ready and I can’t do that with hair extensions tickling my nose.”
“I’m not going help you get ready. I’m not going to let you and Josh get married. I love him and he wants to marry me not you!”
“Of course he does,” Holly smiled, “What Marcus failed to mention was that I am not only going to marry Josh but I’m marrying you too. I’m marrying the both of you.”
“Ewwww! I’m no lesbian! I’m not marrying a woman even if she does look like a supermodel on a good day! I’m not kinky Holly. I’m not entering into any threesome with you and Josh!”
Holly just laughed, not an evil maniacal laugh but a genuine chuckle like she had just told a hilarious joke which was weird because Patience was sure that she never did that.
“You don’t understand. He is marrying you. I’m here to marry him to you, I’m the wedding planner.”
“The wedding planner?” Patience stopped in her tracks and looked at the dress again, “I don’t get it?”
“Sit,” Holly commanded, “I’ll explain as Fiona and the girls do your hair and makeup.”
Suddenly a team of women burst throught the doors to the kitchen. They were all giggling their congratulations as they fussed over Patience. Holly calmly drew up a chair.
“Marcus is such a devil. Mr Mancini and Mr Camerota have been friends since childhood. It was a joke between them that their oldest children would have to marry so that they could finally officially call each other brother.”
“Mr Mancini? Who’s that?” Patience managed to ask as someone pulled at her hair and another woman was torturing her fingernails.
“Then when you and Josh started to show signs of attraction those two old men put their heads together and hatched this plan. It’s quite amazing it worked, you two must have something special.”
“Worked? Plan?”
“Don’t look like that. He didn’t slip you love potion or anything like that,” Holly rolled her eyes, “He just kept you apart until the time was right. He knew Josh well enough that he didn’t want him jumping in too soon and ruining it. He knew that Josh wouldn’t fall out of love with you. So all he really had to do was ensure you didn’t meet anyone better than Josh.”
“What?”
“Think of him as a huge big tough-as-nails cupid.”
“I think I’m going to be sick!”
“Eww no! Quick ladies pull her hair back, can’t have chunks in her hair.”
Patience held head down as the questions swirled around making her nauseated.
“Patience, we don’t have time for this. Come on we have to make you beautiful.”
“So the arranged marriage was with me? I was the one the whole time?”
“Yes. You were the one Josh was supposed to marry but Marcus didn’t want to force either of you. He knew that the only way this relationship would stand the test of time was if Josh stood up to him and put his love for you as his first and only priority. He wanted to have you declare yourselves and marry out of love not because of the agreement that he and Frank made. See, what a sweetie.”
“Frank? Frank who?”
“Your father, Frank Mancini, like Josh you were given an alias to avoid detection.”
“My father? Alias? Detection? I don’t understand?”
“You will have to ask someone else about him. I only know what Marcus told me.”
She then started flustering over the other women as the prodded continued their work. Patience sat in silence, confused and lost. Was this really happening?
After what seemed like an eternity, Holly made the final alterations and looked at her with a broad smile. Patience didn’t recognise the girl in the mirror. Her hair was piled up on her head with orchids woven into the soft ringlets, her makeup made her look like a Hollywood starlet not a highschool geek, and Holly was right, the dress was perfect. It was simple but elegant. It was cut as a simple sheath dress that fell into a wide skirt and train. There was a delicate pattern in the fabric but no lace and no fuss. Patience loved it.
“Holly, why am I dressed like a bride?” Patience cringed making the figure in the mirror look a little bit more like herself.
“Ohh, you know Marcus! He loves his jokes. What better costume for you to go to a fancy dress party than this?” Holly picked up the final piece, the veil. She pushed it into place within the intricate hair before she pulled the gauze forward to hide Patience’s face.
“Wait! Does Josh know? Does he know the truth?”
Holly giggled, “I don’t know. Marcus wouldn’t tell me if he was going to let Josh know.”
“No! He has to see my face! He’s going to think I’m you!”
But Holly just laughed and steered Patience out the door to the waiting Limo. Carlos held the door open. He was now dressed in a very tailored tuxedo, with a simple hand tied bowtie in cream and a button hole of orchids to match those in her hair.
“Umm, sorry about before,” Patience cringed but Holly pushed her in before he had a chance to do more than smile at her.
Holly then spent the rest of the car ride on her cell phone and slapping Patience when she tried to bite her nails or fidget with her hair.
Loyal pulled at his collar, the house was full with people in every costume imaginable. The music was blaring and he was nervous. He didn’t have a choice, about anything now. Anna had stuck to her guns and both her and his mother, were currently hunting him. Thank hell this was a costume party, they would never recognise him looking like this, later, well later was a different matter.
He wiped his palms on his black pants and again. He was worried. So many things could go wrong tonight. But first he needed to get the first part of the night sorted. He had no problems with the task Mr C entrusted with him. He had done everything Mr C had asked of him, he had kept Patience for Josh, he had kept their budding romance alive and then added fuel when necessary, and now he was ready for Mr C final request. And despite everything, he was looking forward to this.
It was the remainder of the night that made him fearful. He was going to do something that he never thought possible. He was going to stand up and be the man he was. It might be painful and it wouldn’t be pleasant but he owed it to himself and he owed it to those he loved. It was time for him to stop pretending and start living his life.
The music died. Loyal looked across the faces of the confused dancers. Mr C was dragging Josh towards him and Josh didn’t look happy. He was fighting his hold but Mr C made steady progress through the crowds. Mr C was obviously still pretty fit. Josh was trying to twist out of grip but Mr C didn’t slow down. Josh was stuffed. Loyal tried hard not to laugh. He had to be serious. Actually he had to act a little drunk, that was what was requested.
“Whatz up buddy,” he slurred at Josh. “Hey, Mr C good to see ya!”
“Loyal, we told the girls we would meet them here. Nice costume.”
“Let me go!” Josh spat, “I won’t do as I’m told. Let me go old man! I want to be with Patience not Holly! Loyal get him off me.”
“I’d love to help you out man, but Mr C doesn’t like anyone touching his suit,” was what Loyal said but it came out ‘Id lube t’heelp ya maan, bot Mish C doshent lick anybun torshin is ute.’ He then swayed a little before adding, “Might never be able to pee straight again.”
“You’re drunk!” Josh stated the obvious, “Loyal, I love Patience, you have to sober up and help me! He’s making me marry this Holly chick!”
“She’s a chicken? Ya Dad’s making you marry a chicken! Well damn! Congrats! You guys will have some crazy eggs!”
Josh swore loudly and gave up on Loyal, “You can’t do this!” he said again to his father, “I’ll never forgive you for this!”
Mr C just smiled and laughed, “You will thank me afterwards son.”
Loyal looked up to see Carlos entering the house, they nodded at each other. Then Loyal turned to the DJ and gave the signal. The music started. All the colour leeched from Josh’s face. Josh was really fighting now but Carlos had two large hands rested on his shoulders.
The room shifted. Like a ballet, all the participants shuffled into their places. The team, who were dressed as football playing zombies, pushed everyone aside and standing shoulder to shoulder and facing each other, then they look a step back forming a guard of honour from the front door to where Loyal, Josh and Mr C were standing. They lifted their arms and the long stem red roses they held touched in the centre of the aisle they had formed.
The crowd uttered a hushed breath as the bride entered the house. She seemed to be a little confused but then she stubbled forward, almost like someone had given her a shove in the right direction. She didn’t exactly walk in time to the wedding march that was playing but she made it down to the front of the room and took her place next to Josh who was now heavily sweating.
“Thanks guys,” Loyal gave the guys a little wave, “But next time - wear some deodorant! Hell, I can smell your pits from here! You nearly suffocated the bride!” The he opened up a large book and stood tall, “Dearly beloved, and those of you who are here that we really hate and would never have invited - you know who are,” Loyal glared into the crowd then he adjusted his priest costume again, “We are gathered here in the site of beer, wine and other alcoholic beverages to bear witness to this union, hell I hope we don’t have to see them going for it! I love you Josh mate but I don’t need to see you making the beast with two backs.”
The crowd laughed and Patience stole a glance at Josh, he was twisting but Carlos held him firmly. He was searching all the faces with desperate eyes. Patience tried to catch his attention but he was too busy looking for something, or someone. She reached for his fingers. But as soon as she touched his skin he yanked his hand away and scowled at her with a fierceness that scared her.
“Hang on, Hang on, I read that bit wrong,” Loyal lifted up the big leather bound book that he cradled, “It should say, To bear witness of the matrimonial union of Joshua Trent Camerota and Patience Lee Mancini.”
“Patience?” Josh swung around and stared at her through the veil. At that moment Carlos stepped back.
“Happy Birthday Petal, this is my gift to you, look after my son,” Mr Camerota smiled then also stepped back.
“Patience?” Josh’s now stood in front of her.
She dropped her head unsure as to how he would react to her now. He slid his finger under her chin and raised her face to his while moving the gauze material away.
“Patience,” he smiled then his lips were on hers. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her like his life depended on it.
“No! We, are, not, up, to, that, part, yet!” Loyal thumped Josh with his leather bound book with each word.
Josh drew back, his eyes twinkled, “I love you Patience.”
“I love you too,” she smiled back
“Not that part either! Come on! You guys are ruining this!” Loyal whined like a four year old.
Josh laced his fingers with hers but didn’t take his eyes off her. The stood facing each other oblivious to everyone around them as Loyal continued the vows.
“If-any-one-can-show-just-cause-why-they-may-not-lawfully-be-joined-together-speak-now,” Loyal said all as one word, “And if you do, I will fish your dead body out of the river later.”
“Nope? Just as well because I have plans for later and digging a shallow grave would really cut into them.” He clapped Josh on the shoulder, “Looks like she’s yours buddy. Joshua Trent Camerota will you have this woman to be your lawful wedded wife? Will you love her, always admit that you are wrong even if you aren’t, give her toe curling orgasms, bail her brother out of trouble every now and again, and make her blissfully happy for as long as you both shall live?
Josh smiled, “I will.”
“Patience Lee Mancini will you have this man to be your lawful wedding husband? Will you love him, accept that he is a moron, don’t nag him when he’s playing computer games, give him mind-blowing sex, allow him to go out with his irresponsible friends occasionally, and make him manfully happy for as long as you both shall live?”
Patience rolled her eyes at Loyal before smiling her, “I will.”
Loyal handed Josh a wedding band and as he slid the ring on her finger he said, “I Joshua Trent Camerota take you Patience Lee Mancini to be my wife. I promise to treat you like a princess, to be faithful and honest to you and to never again let you go.”
Then Patience took the ring from Loyal, “I Patience Lee Mancini take you Joshua Trent Camerota to be my husband. I promise to never forget that you are my man, to be faithful and honest to you and follow you to the ends of the world.”
“By the powers rested in me,” then Loyal turned to Josh and a low growl added, “And if you ever cheat on my sister I will make salami out of your baby-maker,” then his expression cleared as he faced the room again, “I now declare you husband and wife you may kiss the bride, take her upstairs and pump her full of your never-wild-again seed and populate the world with little Josh’s!”
Josh punched Loyal in the stomach as he turned to Patience and thoroughly kissed his bride.
“Go!” Loyal dragged Josh off her while making gagging sounds, “Have your Wedding dance in private before you corrupt our innocent eyes! Unbelievable, kids these days - can’t keep it decent in public places.”
Patience could hardly hear herself as she asked, “Loyal, this wasn’t real was it?”
Perhaps no one heard her either because Josh just laughed and swung her into his arms and almost ran up the stairs. Patience buried her blushing face in his shoulder and then realised what else was wrong. She hadn’t seen Jake in the crowd. Actually she hadn’t seen Sam, Alex or the twins either. Were they all so upset by this joke that they had left the party? Was Jake that angry? Or maybe he didn’t even turn up to the party. After all he knew all the cops would be here tonight, maybe he was off doing something highly illegal. In the end it didn’t matter because Josh kissed her again and what Jake was doing suddenly seemed irrelevant.
The crowd was still gazing after Josh and Patience, Loyal closed his eyes and summoned all his courage. This was the time to do this, it was now or never.
“Everyone, I have an announcement to make!” he stood up on a speaker box, “You guys have known me my whole life and I know that this will come as a surprise but,” he tore off the black shirt and priests collar he was wearing and spread his arms so everyone could read the t-shirt he was wearing.
“I’M GAY! From now on I ONLY SUCK DICKS!” his shirt read.