The sun was so bright that she had to cover her face with her hands. After the disconcerting ease with which she had exposed herself on the outside, she doubted again the usefulness of such a bold act. Blind as she was, she found herself unable to do anything but defend herself against the elements.
What surprised her the most was the biting air that passed through each gap between her gloves and touched her face. The smallest emanation of cold assailed her skin. Even if it was just breathing, her lungs were burning, despite the small puffs she was taking. She inhaled the air through her mouth and closed it as if she was chewing on an almost tangible food. Her teeth were painful and she started hiccuping, not knowing which ailments to treat first.
She realized that panic was invading her mind. Recalling all the times she had been in a perilous situation, the advice of her guardians came to mind. She took a few breaths through her nose. This turned out to be an idea with a dubious result because the blades that passed through her nostrils competed with the pain that pierced her eyes when she was trying to open them. She wanted to sneeze, hold her breath, and most importantly, see where she was going to go to return to the maternal comfort of the house. Whining in fear and pain, she squatted down in a primary protective reflex.
She forced herself to calm down. She gathered all the will she had and concentrated on her breath. After a few unsuccessful attempts, she began to breathe normally and realized that the air was not as sharp after a few slow and deep breaths. She could hear blows ringing around her. It took her a long time to realize that he néach had to work hard to break the walls of other houses. The regular noise, muffled by her hat, echoed in her ears.
Taghna eventually regained control of her emotions and stood up again by lowering the protection of her arms. She had won, once again. Asgeül and Slavan had only to watch out. Behind her closed eyelids, a red glow shone, as if it was almost animated by a life of its own. The shadows and colours fluctuated and she couldn't grasp their origins. She quickly gave up her questions for fear of running into some bad news.
She then half-opened her eyes and hastened to look for Araig and Vorn. The two women had always been her landmarks. They had never left her before. One of them was using a branch to knock down a wall while the other one cleared the pieces that were blocking her movements. Taghna took a few steps on the snow in their direction, out of habit, but rather than joining them, her gaze clung to a new element, almost by chance. She turned her head and felt like she was being hit in the chest.
The foreign beauty of the landscape exploded in front of her eyes. An unimaginable amount of snow surrounded her. Its whiteness shone and prevented her from discerning the surroundings, composed of majestic trees. The distance between her and the edge of the clearing seemed gigantic because she was so used to walking through her universe in a few steps. In her head, it would take her whole days to explore only their small village. The world around her was so vast that her mind refused, or rather was unable, to imagine beyond what she had before her eyes. She also realized how ignorant she was, almost in proportion to what she still had to discover. A growing dizziness rose to her head, mixed with fear and excitement.
Her other senses were also in shock. The smells that came to her, pure, damp and clear, were all new. She seemed to recognize some of them, with the somewhat frustrating feeling of remembering something without being able to put her finger on it. Nevertheless, the scents alone were sufficient to depict a cosmos of fabulous density and complexity.
Taghna had the impression that the first moments of her life, filled with unforgettable memories, adventures and discoveries, more or less violent uproar followed by slight reprimands, were only the backbone of a prodigious beast waiting only to be observed, tamed, explored and hunted.
Behind her back, she did not hear Asgeül and Slavan leaving the house in their turn. She was completely absorbed by her environment. Her two companions, reassured to see their brathaïr in good health, had decided to follow her. But, unlike Taghna, after getting used to the outdoors, they had been quick to join the adults. They helped them in their task by giving them little heels and were already participating in the life of the village.
Compared to what she observed with greed, Taghna didn't care what the rest of the people did. She remained alone, absorbing the sounds and scents that enveloped her. All this snow kept surprising her. Of course, she had already seen some, without dedicating more than a quick thought to it. Her néach would go and get some near the roof beams when they had to collect water to prepare a meal, but in such a quantity, it was unbelievable.
Her field of vision was limited to the forest in front of her. Her eyes could not help but go up along the trunks. They divided into smaller and smaller branches and, from where she was, they almost looked like hair so thin they were. The branches swung gently in the wind, shivered, held on.
- So that's the world, thought Taghna.
She was amazed and stunned by all the new things that were open to her. The adults had told them about it, countless times. But the words, the lapidary and fuzzy descriptions, as well as the few specimens of dried leaves they had handled, did not reflect what she was going through at that moment. The sound of insects, the ringing of a drop of water falling from a patch of ice and the bite of the wind on her face filled her with a powerful joy that made her want to explore the surroundings, touch and feel this nature with all her senses until every detail was known to her.
Even more attractive was the huge blue area that stretched over this delicate mantilla. By tilting her head upwards, her entire visual field was occupied by this void. The mystery it represented was total. Her néach had never lingered in this part of the world before. Their stories favoured the land, the plants and the animals. Taghna was fascinated by the beauty of this element and spent a long time contemplating it until she felt a small pat on the back of the head.
- Stop looking at the sky or you'll lose your mind. Come on, we have to introduce ourselves to the séalyar.
She thought it was Asgeül who was still acting up, but it was Drahul, her fourth and last néach. He had gotten rid of the dirt on his face. His light irises were now clearly visible and he was almost unrecognizable. Taghna followed him and arrived behind the procession of adults and children heading towards the mataïg, the home of the elders. Its structure was identical in every respect to the other buildings, except for its size, which was almost twice as imposing as the other houses. Two or three people were already attacking the smooth face of the wall. Their concerted efforts paid off quickly and a tense silence settled over the assembly. The children quickly began to get bored with the lack of action but they did their best to stay focused.
Finally, three women emerged with dignity from the entrance, one after the other, before standing in line in front of the rest of the village. Taghna, who had paid little attention to the scene, as she was too attracted by the new things around, could not help but be interested in the séalyar. Their faces were covered with tiny folds that made them look like dried-up plants. They stood there, in front of the mataïg, like pieces of wrinkled leather. This appearance, at the very least pitiful to the little girl, contrasted with the immaculate whiteness of their hair, which certainly ennobled them, at least according to Taghna.
She wondered what had happened to them and whether this physical weakness was a sign of their great wisdom that Vorn or Drahul had never ceased to mention. Despite their weak appearance, Taghna could see how respectful the adults were in front of the deans. They were on the lookout, hypnotized by their presence, so much so that she did not dare to make the slightest gesture or say a single word.
A woman, tall and dry and with more confidence than Taghna had ever observed from her néach, stepped forward towards the deans. When she reached their height, she carried her hands to her temples and lowered her head. Taghna recognized the most important sign of welcoming she had been taught. The first of the three séalyar, the one that seemed the least damaged, came to lay its forehead against that of the woman. They exchanged a few words and separated. Then the woman did the same with the next séalyar .
One after the other, every member of the village went to present their respect. Some took their time, others did it in a hurry. Two women, with dark features and fixed in a certain solemnity, carried in their hands a small terracotta pot hermetically sealed. The third séalyar, the one whose wrinkles dug into her forehead and cheeks, was in charge of accepting the offerings. His attitude and careful actions were imbued with compassion. She placed them behind her with great delicacy and the small receptacles formed two small spots on the ground, isolated and a little sad.
It was clear to Taghna that an extremely strong connection existed between the village members and their elders. Behind their actions, which were repeated many times, was hidden a respect and a love that only the passage of lethal trials established between individuals. Despite this, the presentations were too repetitive to maintain her interest for too long. The sun was coming down behind the trees. She would have preferred to use this time differently, but she was afraid of being called to order. Customs were the strongest link between individuals and ignoring them never produced anything good. So she stayed there and meditated on the cold that was beginning to penetrate her body.
Taghna was yawning when Asgeül pushed her behind her back. Believing that she was looking for a fight and angry to be interrupted in this way, she turned around before she realized that it was her turn to appear before the deans. A great gap had been created between her and the old women.
She hurried to join them and arrived in front of the first séalyar. At close range, the impression she had was quite different from the one she had initially perceived. The smallest details of the wrinkled face stood out as stories and events she had experienced. Instead of weakness, they expressed a past that Taghna could not quite imagine but that her néach had shared with her through their stories. Her eyes were alert and shown a profound intelligence. The little girl was intimidated by the energy they were radiating with and she felt as if she was being totally exposed.
She knelt, or rather, fell on her knees, which compressed the snow under her weight. She could see the toes of the elder, gnarled and with nails whose colours varied from black to yellow. Taghna was a bit disgusted. The snow had melted all around and formed a transparent and icy crust. She remained prostrate, a little lost, not knowing if she should take the next step.
She didn't have to think about it any longer because she felt a hand resting on her shoulder. The grip was powerful. She raised her eyes timidly, and they met the piercing gaze again.
- Get up, Taghna. Séabanh accepts you among us. Here you are, a daughter of Séaroën. Come on, get up, don't be afraid, said the dean.
Her deep voice seemed to come out of another body, of a much more imposing and dense dimension than the one she had before her eyes. The thin limbs and bony shoulders were covered with a thin cloak tied around a neck that was thicker than long. The brooch that held the two sides together was a piece of bone engraved with plant motifs. It was the most beautiful object Taghna had ever seen.
The little girl, still disturbed, went to bow to the second séalyar. She repeated the same words but in a much softer and more enveloping voice:
- Welcome, Taghna. Rissar accepts you among us. You are now a daughter of Séaroën. Will you do your best to participate in the life of our village and perpetuate its traditions?
Taghna stammered a statement. Rissar smiled warmly at her and sent her to the third and last dean, who whispered so weakly that she did not understand a word she said. She then went to join the group of children that had formed a little further away, near a fire placed under a makeshift dwelling made of a few branches and deer skins. From now on, they would no longer sleep in the shelter of houses but as close as possible to the elements.
The darkness had settled on Séaroën. The sky had turned deep blue and the fine clouds that were floating were charged with orange colours. The effect did not last long and the night, barely driven away by the fire, finished wrapping the small village. Taghna still refused to share a moment with her classmates. She heard them squealing, names were flying, anecdotes were told together, just as insignificant to her eyes because she preferred to probe the darkness or admire the luminous points that appeared in the sky.
Sleep eventually won over the children. Taghna wondered what they should do. She noticed that there was only one little boy left in front of the deans. He was particularly puny. His furs could not hide his small stature. As he walked towards Séabanh, the first dean, the unfortunate boy stumbled and fell to the ground. He got up as quickly as he could, glanced to the right and then to the left and noticed that Taghna was staring at him. Despite the lack of light, he blushed so hard that his discomfort was visible to everyone. He rushed to finish the presentations and joined the small group.
When Taghna finally decided to join them, Asgeül had already caught their attention. She was telling them about the time she fell into a jar full of fat. It took her days to get rid of it by standing away from the fire to remove the plates that were hardening on her skin in the cold air. It was one of her favorite stories and she would tell it over and over again. Everyone was laughing. Taghna, who had a much less advantageous version of the facts, preferred to stay in the background. She had spent enough time with her brathair to know that the debates were quickly turning into ferocious battle. Besides, they hadn't even thanked her for risking her life by going out first.
With the night and the cold, the children laid down one after the other by the fire, squeezing each other. Those who were a little far from the fire shivered and rushed to join their comrades. The adults were having lively conversations. Some had covered themselves with a small hat, but the majority seemed to be satisfied with their loincloth. They seemed to ignore the fate of their offspring, which only precipitated the arrival of sleep.
Taghna would have liked to eat something. She could feel her belly rumbling but she didn't know where to find food. She went to her house but noticed that the little boy who had made a fool of himself during the presentation was staring at her. Believing he was caught in the act, without really knowing why, Taghna stopped sharply and maintained her gaze. The child did not blink. She then shrugged her shoulders and went to lie down with the others. She fell asleep without feeling the blankets that the adults wrapped around them.