Funny you're the broken one but I'm the only one who needed saving, 'cause when you never see the light it's hard to know which one of us is caving.
Not really sure how to feel about it, something in the way you move, makes me feel like I can't live without you, it takes me all the way, I want you to stay.
—————
~ J A N N A H ~
—————
This is the most uncomfortable moment I've ever experienced in my life. Both my parents are sitting on the sofa opposite mine and looking at me intensely, waiting for my answer as if it was a matter of life or death which for me, it was since my mom will probably kill me if I give the wrong answer.
I wish Umma had talked about this with me alone before involving my dad. But she probably knew that if it were only me and her, I would've just refused straight away so she took this step and trapped me.
Though I am a daddy's girl and Abba could be extremely flexible when it came to me, I also know that he had a breaking point and there were times when he put on his no nonsense face. Unfortunately, this was one of those times, and even more unfortunately, the subject was Faisal.
That guy had been after me since that accidental meeting last Monday so much so that he had gotten our parents into this. Apparently - according to her after I had threatened to show Yasin one of her ugliest pictures - Maryam had given Faisal my mom's number and over this weekend, he talked with her on the phone and told her how serious he was about wanting to marry me.
Of course I had suffered a heart attack when I had heard that. Just moments ago after I was done with breakfast and was about to head out to the university, Umma cornered me and brought me to the living room where Abba was sat with a grave expression. I felt like I had done something majorely wrong and was about to get the scolding of my life only for Abba to ask me if I was ready to marry Faisal.
That guy is a total nutcase. I've been avoiding him since we met but he still hasn't gotten the signal and he still got me into this mess. It's all Maryam's fault for giving him my mom's number and I am so going to get her for it. Yasin is so going to see that picture of her with her something disgusting dripping from her lips and her whole body looking like she's just swallowed a whale.
"Ko baki ji ni ne ba?" Abba snapped me out of of my evil plans for Maryam.
"Yes I heard you Abba," I answered gingerly, I couldn't even raise my head to look at him. "I just don't know what to say since I don't even know the guy. He took me to an ice cream place once and then he calls me everyday but I rarely even pick up the calls so it's just surprising to me that he actually officially asked you for my hand when he didn't even ask me first."
Abba removed the intricately embroiderd cap from his head and hung it over his knee. A posture I'm afraid of, he always did that when he wasn't pleased with something and in this case, I know that something was me. I wonder what all Umma has been telling him about me "chasing her perfect son in law away."
"Kinji ko Salma? (Have you heard her Salma?)" he addressed Umma in our language. "Kinji matsalar yaran nan na zamani ko? (You've heard how the kids of this generation are so problematic?)"
Abba then suddenly turned to me, his voice alarmingly strict. "So what if he approached us first before talking to you? Isn't that how things are done in our culture? And even Islamically? It even shows how mature and responsible he is! And about you not knowing him, if we know him and we approve of him; his character, his manners and his religion, isn't that enough for you?"
Well now I'm starting to get really scared, I've never seen my dad so agitated at me before. Yasin was usually the only who got this side of him not me. Umma must've told him a lot of things about how I was ruining my life and turning down every suitor that came my way, planning to stay a spinster my whole life just so I could continue working for the Jada Foundation. I look at her and by how smug she looks and satisfied with Abba's reaction she is, I know that indeed that was what she did to unleash this side of him on me.
"Yes Abba, it's enough for me if you approve of him because I know there's no one in this world who loves me and wants the best for me like you two do. But this is a question of marriage, don't I atleast get to know who it is I'm going to spend my whole life with?"
He took a deep breath and put his cap back on his head. He had softened up, finally. He then looked at me with that kind of fond and caring expression I was used to seeing on his face. That was my dad for you, his emotions were the definition of dynamic.
"To me, he really sounds like a good person," Abba started, "I know his family and I've even met him a few years ago so Mamana, what I want you to do now is give that boy a chance. Your mother told me that he complained that you don't even pick up his calls nor do you meet him at the university when he comes to pick up his sister. If you keep that up, how are you going to know him? Mamana, just try and give him some of your time okay?"
The nerve of that guy. He actually reported me to my own mom? Even making Abba call me by my pet name, Mamana which literally means "My Mother" so now I have no choice but to be the perfect daughter and do what it is Abba has asked me to. Since I was named after Abba's mother, he has never called me by it, he has never called me Asiya and hence why I was nicknamed Jannah. Though according to Umma, there was a different story apart from that. She told me that since the Pharaoh's wife, Asiya had been promised paradise since she was on earth, the nickname Jannah was given to me out of the hundreds of other options and it did make sense to me.
"Okay Abba I will, I promise." I smile at him.
"Now that's like my girl." he beamed and I feel like a ten year old girl again. "So he's outside waiting and you can start by letting him drive you to the university today okay?"
I looked at Abba and then at Umma in shock. So this has all been a set up? Though she had been silent, I know that she was the who planned this whole thing. She knew I couldn't argue with my dad so she had masterminded this whole thing.
"O-okay Abba." I agree reluctantly and before I had excused myself to go to my room and get my veil, I noticed the wide grin that grew on Umma's face. Her plan had been a success.
I have no idea why she's so hell bent on getting me married when Yasin is right in front of her, desperate and yearning to marry Maryam. His anger at me has long blown off over this week and I know that he has been busy concocting another way to convince her since I wasn't going to help. I'm sure that if Umma had been as interested in getting him married as she had been to get me, then they would have figured out something by now. But no, according to Umma, I'm the girl so I have to get married first.
She even has a whole store room full of items she had saved for me to take to my "matrimonial home." I know it's our culture and stuff but Umma's was just too much. I think her life's goal is to get me married. Was I really that much of a pain in her neck?
I had wrapped my brown veil over the lemon green ankara skirt and blouse outfit I had on and as I put my leather backpack over my shoulders and ran out of my room, I didn't even bother touching up my makeup or looking at the mirror to see if I looked acceptable. I don't care since I don't care about the person I'm forced to spend atleast thirty minutes with as well.
"I heard you now have your own personal driver." Yasin appeared in front of me as I climbed down the last of the stairs.
Of course, I just ignored him and attempted to brush right past him. I was already late, I don't need my brother's shinnanigans to make things worse.
"Jannah wait." he called and I looked back at him boredly.
"Please not now Yaya, I'm late and -"
"I just need a minute," he rolled his eyes. "then you can go back to your super busy life Madam President."
I sighed and turned fully to him, releasing the straps of my backpack and placing my arms akimbo. "Yes?"
"I've just been noticing that these days, Maryam seems weaker..."
Of course the subject has to be Maryam.
"You know she never tells me about this stuff since she has that stupid idea of thinking she's a freak simply cause she gets sick but Jannah," he sighed heavily before he ran a hand over his head and I could see the genuine worry clouding his eyes. "Jannah, Maryam's not okay. You know that she had her dialysis on Saturday and ever since then, though she's been telling me she's fine, she just doesn't seem so. I know she's an idiot so she'll still come to that university of yours today and continue pretending so what I want you to do is to please look after her."
"You don't need to tell me that, I already always do that duh." My tone is playful, an attempt to lessen Yasin's worry. "And how do you not know that that's always how she gets after her dialysis? It's just the side-effects of the procedure, nothing else. You know our Maryam is one tough cookie." I smile because that was pure truth.
Maryam is the strongest, bravest and most selfless person I will ever know. I can't even begin to imagine how it's like to live life with a health that is always wanting and in need of countless trips to the hospital. But Maryam does that every single day yet she still has enough space in her heart to think about the troubles of others, she still has enough time in her life to try to help them and lessen their troubles. Exactly like she's doing for our participants now.
I walk closer to Yasin and just because I see he's feeling down today, I'll forget his annoyingness and be nice to him. It must really hurt to see someone you love so deeply in pain, so accustomed to suffering, like he has seen Maryam.
I punch him lightly on the shoulder. "You know what, today, I'll put in a good word for you."
Yasin's feature's instantly lit up and he straightened up. "Really? But yeah... it's about time you did that much for me after all the nice things I do for you every day." he sighed dramatically.
So he decided to come back to his annoying self? Okay fine, brothers will be brothers anyways.
"You're lucky I'm late so I can't wait and prove how wrong you are."
"Yeah right Madam President," he calls after me as I run away, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "have a nice flight to the G20 summit."
-----
"Salamu alaikum." Faisal shone his spotlessly white teeth at me.
"Wa alaykumussalam Faisal." I manage half a smile as I enter into the passenger door of his Venza he had held open for me.
I don't even want to rate the level of annoyance this guy evoked in me because I know then, my head will surely blow off. I in no way want to be disrespectful to him and I in no way think I'm better than him in any way. My reason is simple; I have absolutely zero interest in him and I was sure that wasn't going to change.
I'm really a very honest person and I hate leading people on. If I don't like you, I would never pretend otherwise but now, my mom has trapped me her with a person I'm sure I will never like. There was nothing lacking in Faisal, he seemed like a very nice guy and he's got the looks as well as the money to enhance his appeal but I feel absolutely nothing for him and I know that that fact will remain a constant.
"So the weather's quite cloudy this morning, it looks like its going to rain." Faisal states the obvious as he looks up at the stormy sky through the windshield.
"Yes, I guess so." I answer looking through my window at the gradually darkening sky and I feel Faisal start the drive.
A few moments were spent in silence, with Faisal's attention on the road and me still looking at the sky as streaks of electricity shattered it and thunder roared through it. It started with a few drops falling on my window pane and then suddenly, after a strike of lightning that flashed for milliseconds and loud thunder that rumbled and almost made me jump out of my skin, the rain started to fall in cats and dogs.
Though I know out there there must be a riot of sounds going on, inside the car, was almost completely silent apart from the faint reflection of the chaos outside. The whole road ahead of us turned hazy and Faisal had to turn on his headlights. I was even worried that he might not be able to drive through the rain but I was wrong and Faisal continued driving, unbothetherd as if he had done this a hundred times.
I wish he would just say what it is he had to say right now and not wait till we got to the universusy since I was already late and as if he had heard my thoughts, Faisal finally broke the silence.
"Listen, Jannah -"
My mind froze at that, I was completely aghast and didn't even hear the rest of what came after that. He had just called me Jannah? Who gave him the right to do that and why would he even do that? I guess the answer was obvious, to establish a romantic level of familiarity between us.
"- the truth is," my mind had resumed from it's break. "I'm not a child, I'm a grown man; a twenty nine year old and believe me at this age, I know just how precious time is so I really do not fancy wasting it. That is why I'm always direct and straight to the point in everything I do and that includes you. My interests in you, Jannah, are very clear and that was why I contacted your family. I want us to be serious with each other and let this relationship lead to marriage."
Okay, first of all what relationship? The relationship of me avoiding you for the past week and you refusing to just take the hint? But of course, I didn't allow those thoughts to escape my lips and just listened on as he continued.
"I have been looking for a wife for more than a year now and believe me, I'm not trying to sound cocky or anything but I have had more than enough options to choose from over that time but none of them Jannah, none of them made me feel the spark that you made me feel when we first met that day I had brought Fatima for the orientation. Absolutely no one." he turned his gaze from the wet road, towards me and looked at me intently for a moment before returning it back.
"Honestly," he chuckles, earnestly. "If it were up to me, I wouldn't mind us getting married by tomorrow. Call it impatience or risky but that's just how I live my life, I do not believe in wasting a single second. If I feel something is right I just plunge into it without a second thought. And you Jannah, I feel you are right so please, allow me to take this relationship further."
I took a minute to think and just as I opened my mouth to say the words, he continued, yet again.
"I know there's bound to be certain doubts, questions or whatever in your mind but whatever it is, I'll clear then, I promise. All you have to do is give me a chance."
Inwardly, I sighed in defeat. He had said the very thing I was about to use at my argument and now I'm left with nothing. But luckily, I see that we're almost at the gates of the university and I'm soon going to be free. This is in no way what I feel in my heart and I feel bad letting my lips utter something that is a deception to my true feelings but I just brace myself and let the words roll out of my tongue.
"I will give you a chance Faisal, I'll try my best to understand you and make a decision from my heart."
"Thank you." Faisal smiles, and looks at me as we stop at the check post and wait for the security now with raincoats over their usual uniform, to finish inspecting the boot of the car.
"And when should I expect that decision?" he asks, as moves the car forward at the security's signal. Indeed he was impatient.
"Two weeks." I had blurted that out way too fast and regretted it too late, I should have said two months!
"Alhamdulillah, I hope they'll be positive."
I could only smile, guilty knowing that since now, this moment, I know that they were going to be majorly negative.
"Thank you." I say once he's parked in the driveway and I begin to open the door.
"Wait, wait," he stops me, making me turn to him. "there's an umbrella at the back, let me get it for you."
"No!" this time I stopped him. "It's okay really, it's only drizzling now and besides, I only have to walk a few steps before I get into the entrance so no worries, really."
"You sure?"
I thrust my hand out the reeled down window and feel the few, weakened drops of rain that fall on it. I look up at the sky and see how it's starting to clear up and brighten, how the clouds have emptied themselves of their burden and the ground all around is shining with a glossy finish. Though rain somehow terrified me, I have always been a fan of its aftermath. How the colors of everything intensify and look more robust and even richer in hue, and how the atmosphere is refreshened by a new breath of air. I especially love the deep and earthy fragrance of petrichor that perfumes the air and makes me want to eat the wet sand, and the moist cold that hangs heavily and creates a romantic weather for two ambience.
"Yeah," I say with a smile as I alight from the car.
I shut the door gently and waved at Faisal, my happiness at our parting simply knew no bounds. "Thank you."
"I'll call you later okay?" he returns, and I know that was said with the intention of making me have no excuse for not picking up.
I nodded and smiled and I start walking away, relishing in the scent of spent rain and the feel of its few, last remaining soldiers dripping down on me.
The hallway was silent, they were barley five people walking through it as I entered and I know the rain had done that. Everyone was probably either in the cafeteria or in a class even if there was no class going on just to wait out the cold of the rain.
Earlier in the car, even though the sound of the rain was incredibly lightened by the hood over our heads, I had known by the intensity of the pitter patter that this was no ordinary rain, this was an extremely cold type of rain. The rainy season was crazy in this town and it so happened that sometimes, when it rained, rock frozen ice also fell down from the sky. No it isn't snow, it's nothing like the soft, flaky snow you'd want to play out under, it's rock hard ice that you wouldn't want to be under when it fell. And today's rain, had been exactly that kind of rain. I had even felt the cracking of ice under my shoes and seen bits of melted ice on the pavement as I was walking in.
Thank God I had on a huge and thick pashmina veil and though I still felt the cold seeping through, I knew I could manage the rest of the day since hopefully, it's going to grow warmer as the rain continues to cease. I wonder if Ahmad had worn a jacket today too and I wonderd which color it was. It was definitely a dark color since all the ones he worn through out last week were dark. It must be marine blue, I guessed in eager anticipation but well, I had just a few more steps before I would see for myself.
I hurried along and I checked my orange swatch and saw that it was almost 10 am. Meaning I was extremely late and though it wasn't what caused my lateness, my parents intervention and Faisal's conversation had, this rain was a good excuse to give Maryam and not have her blow my head off. The meds and procedure of the kidney dialysis also made her extremely cranky.
To save time, I decide to take a short cut and not follow the route through the cafeteria today. I took a left turn and paced hurriedly through the nearly empty hallway where there was an open path that led to the football field on one wall.
As I continued speed walking, the corner of my eye caught something. I had already passed it but my conscience made me take a few steps backwards and turn to the direction of the football field.
It was a silhouette of someone standing out there, at least ten yards ahead of me. I couldn't make up a face but definitely from the clothes and the build, it was a male. It was still raining albeit lightly so why was he standing there? I wondered as I peered my gaze at him but still couldn't see him. He had his back to me and his face was in the other direction.
It wouldn't hurt to just check, one part of me advised. But we're running late already, another part of me argued. But the former seemed to be stronger and it pushed me out of the building and into the clearing of the field before the latter had a chance to protest again.
As I drew closer, I noticed that the guy was hugging/holding himself as well as shaking? And that was when my steps grew faster in worry. I was still a a little bit far but I started to hear his teeth chattering and the shivering breaths that escaped him and at this point, I ran towards him.
My breath was knocked out of my lungs and heart plummeted to its nadir as I stood in front Ahmad. It wasn't just the fact that he was standing on his two feet without a wheelchair nor a cast that surprised me, but because of the horrible state he was in.
His head was down with his eyes tightly closed and arms wrapped protectively around him. His white shirt was soaked to transparency as water dripped from the tip of every strand of his curly dark hair. He was shaking and chattering uncontrollably, as if jolted with electricity at every second and he looked so disconnected, so caged by his folded arms about him and the sound his thoroughly chilled body made that he was completely not on this earth. He must even be oblivious that it had stopped raining.
"Ahmad," I couldn't help my voice cracking not from the fact that I've said his name and addressed him directly for the very first time, but because of how scared I was to the core of seeing him like this.
It turns out my whisper wasn't enough to break him out of his trance. I called out louder again but Ahmad was still unmoving from his position.
I raised my hands up and reach his face. Immedietly I take it in my hands, he finally comes to and his eyes open up, though I know it was in vain since he still can't see me.
"Ahmad." I gently shook the side of his face, the cold I felt there was alarming.
"A-Asiya? th-that y-you?" Ahmad shivers broke up his words.
"Yes, it's me." my voice is thick and I notice that tears had been rolling down my cheeks. "You're cold, you need to get out of here." I put my hand around his arm and gently turn him to the direction of the hallway.
His expression was a mix of surprise, relief and gratitude and I had to wonder how and why he was here in the first place. He staggered along as I guided him but it was clear that he couldn't even quite carry himself. So without a second thought, I adopted a new position. I put his arm over my shoulder and let his body lean on me.
I felt his wet clothing and the spontaneous spasmic shivers of his cold skin against mine. He looked like he was going to fall over and collapse at any moment so I tried my best to support as much of his weight as possible as I held unto him and we arrived into the building. I wish they were some people here, at least I know they wouldn't be so heartless as to leave a man in this condition and they would help me take him to the clinic but now I had to do it alone.
"H-home." Ahmad whispered, "Harri-rison, my d-driver... he's ou-outside."
I was making course to take him to the school nurse but he wanted to me to take him home?
"Ahmad, I'm taking you to the clinic you ne-"
"N-no, ho-ome." he cut me off.
I was reluctant but I figured since the parking lot is much closer than the clinic anyways, it'd be better I get him to his driver like he wants. Maybe he'd take him to the hospital then, maybe Ahmad had some condition and so he could only be treated by a certain doctor. As we turned back, in the direction of the main entrance, I made up all kind of thoughts like this just to convince myself that not taking him to the nurse was the right thing to do.
I seemed to have an abundance of strength today because I didn't even feel a bit fatigued when we reached the parking lot as I continued to support half of his wieght. It must be a tapped from the reservoir of energy only reserved for dire situations like this, times you feel you're responsible to save a person's life especially if that person is someone you care so deeply for.
"Sir?" I heard a voice from behind me and turned to see it was the thirty something year old looking guy I had seen with Ahmad so many times, the driver he was talking about.
Harrison looked at the scene in front of him in shock and worry before he took Ahmad from me and supported his weight himself. He of course did it with much greater ease than I had and I followed close behind as he lead the path to the car.
"I found him out in the rain," I explained as Harrison opened up the car door to the backseat. "how did he get there?"
He looked at me guiltily before diverting his gaze and helping Ahmad into the car. "I don't know, he said he would take himself to class today and..."
"And you let him?" I completed Harrison's sentence with my eyes wide in utter disbelief. I scoffed and ran a hand over my face as an anger burned through me.
Some of it was directed at Harrison's carelessness but most of it towards the predicament that turned Ahmad Sambo blind. I know it was wrong to question fate but at this moment, I couldn't help but to. I wondered what he must've felt all alone except for the company of the thousands of raindrops that had so harshly beat down on him and the ice. Thinking of the ice was even worst, the hundreds of solid chunks of ice that must've fallen and melted on him and he couldn't do anything but stand there, helpless and at a lost of a refuge.
A sudden protective instinct took hold of me, and in a blink, I had opened up the backseat and raised Ahmad's head up before sitting myself in and resting it back on my laps. The driver looked back at me in surprise but he said nothing as he understood the urgency in my demeanour and he just stepped on the gas, speeding us into the driveway and out the gates of the university.
-----
I remember the first time I had entered this mansion. It was back in our first term in SS3 (12th grade) when the school was shook with the news of Ahmad Sambo's father, the famous Abbakar Sambo, passing away. Our teachers organized a home visit for all of Ahmad's classmates and so, all thirty of us came to his house to offer condolences to his mother.
I still vividly remember her face. She was an outrageously gorgeous woman that looked half her age and I understood where Ahmad had gotten his looks from. Now, I should wonder if she looks the same or if the years had taken their toll on her but as I take the first step inside the massive living room, the only thing on my mind is Ahmad. I suddenly remember Yasin, this must be how he felt for Maryam. Seeing someone you love so deeply in pain does hurt a lot.
I expected that his mother or just anyone come running out from and gasp at the state he's in but absolutely no one approached us as Harrison continued supporting Ahmad up the grand stairwell.
I followed them cautiously, feeling like an intruder but the feelings in my chest for the man in front of me kept my head held high.
At the top of the stairs, Harrison entered the first door I saw and immediately I set my eyes through it, I know that it was Ahmad's bedroom. The dark color of the paint with equally dark curtains, the giant poster of something I think to be a cockpit of a plane at the headboard of his bed, the wooden desk at the opposite corner, the tiny metallic toys of different models of planes placed on the desk and cupboards, it just had him written all over it.
"He needs a change of clothes first," I state after Harrison lays a still weak Ahmad on his bed. I know he must already know since from what I could gather, Harrison was a nurse too but my protective instinct didn't care.
"Then put him under heavy covers and take his temperature, he must have a fever already. I hope there's some advil? And also something very hot to drink." I dictated as I looked down at a much steadily shivering Ahmad.
Harrison looked at me like he was confused and I looked at him like I owned not just this house, but his own father's house in the village too but that still wasn't enough to make him budge.
I went over to the wardrobe myself, I know there was no time to waste, Ahmad couldn't just be left in the cold cause of his stubborn driver/nurse so I scoured through the clothing I found in there till I stumbled upon a ridiculously colorful sweater that looks like one you'd see in an old Hollywood Christmas movie.
I pulled it out and some heavy sweat pants too and went over to where Harrison was still standing and handed them to him.
"You help him change, I'll go find something hot to drink." if only I had the right to, I would have changed him myself and not asked this Harrison to do anything.
I turned around and before I walked out the door, I put forward another command. "You better be quick about it Harrison."
The moment I ran down the flight of stairs, I realized how stupid I had been, how would I know where to find him something hot to drink when I don't even know where the kitchen is? As I roamed around, I wondered why the house is so quiet despite it being so big, why Ahmad's mom was nowhere to be seen.
After walking around and looking for almost two minutes, I finally ran into the kitchen. Like the rest of the house, this kitchen was absolutely breath taking but of course I didn't have time to gawk at it before I went straight to work.
I managed to find ingredients to make a very strong cup of hot ginger and lemon tea in under five minutes and I took the dainty piece of ceramic in my hands as hurriedly back to Ahmad's room as I could.
I set the cup down on the cupboard on the left of his bed and stood there looking down at him. Thankfully, Harrison had done his job well and now Ahmad was tucked tightly and securely under the thick woolen cover of his duvet.
His shivers had greatly subsided but they were still there. His eyes were closed but thankfully, he hasn't fallen unconscientious even once. I could tell that he sensed my presence after he turned his head towards where I stood and opened his eyes. I know they couldn't see me but I still preferred it if he kept them open, at least I was safe in knowing he isn't drifting away, he's right here with me, at least I'd know that he's okay.
Which meant I should put that protective instinct to rest now. He's okay, Ahmad's fine so why was I still in his house? Standing in his room? What would my mom think of me if she sees me now? It was that thought that overpowered all the others and made me want to run out of here even though my heart wants nothing but to stay close to Ahmad.
I look towards Harrison who stood near the curtains with his gaze intently cast over Ahmad assuring me that he was in good hands, he had his nurse to take care of him so who am I anyways? I had absolutely no use nor right so I better just leave before I end up getting thrown out.
"Please Harrison, you need to make sure he drinks this and after that, give him some medicine. I'm sure he's already caught a fever." I run my eyes over Ahmad one last time, "Please take care of him." I say before turning hurriedly but was brought to a stop upon feeling my hand held tightly and I didn't need to look back to know who it was.
My heart recognized that touch, it was soft and tender yet strong and demanding and best of all, I felt that it wasn't just a figment of my imagination. I took a while to compose myself before I slowly looked back and saw that it was indeed true. Ahmad had held my hand captive and unbeknownst to him, in that moment what he said had also held my heart captive.
"Stay... please."
A/N
My apologies for the long chapter, hope it wasn't a bore?
Lyrics from the first paragraph up above are from Rihanna and Mikky Ekko's "Stay."