As I stood inside this golden dome, I soon realised that all sound from outside had been shut out completely. All I could hear was the gentle sound of Nelly's feet against the withered grass as she came towards me.
Bedlam was incapacitated, writhing far off in the distance. Only time would tell for how long the beast could be kept at bay.
Our allies were in the opposite direction, also far away and a little tough to make out.
It was just the two of us, standing alone together in the middle of this battlefield.
The golden light that had been surrounding Nelly's body had trickled away into the golden walls around us, and she stood before me as human and as vulnerable as anyone. Her face was fighting to smile, but the heartbreak in her eyes and her trembling hands sent shivers down my spine.
"What's wrong...?" I stepped forward. "Are you ok?"
"...Toby...!" She shook her head and ran straight into my arms, burying her face in my chest and squeezing my shirt tight.
"H-hey... Hey..." I held her, my own heart racing. I didn't like this. Something was gravely off.
"I love you." She breathed.
"I love you too..."
"I've always loved you." She looked up, and I saw tears streaming down her face.
"Nelly... What is it...? What's wrong...?"
"I... I'm so thankful for everything... For everything you..." Her voice got snagged.
"N-Nelly...? Why are you talking like that...? Stop it..." I swallowed. "You're making it sound like you're not gonna see me again..." I tried to laugh light-heartedly, but I found that it hurt me to even attempt it. Nelly looked up at me and her face twisted in pain, as if the sight of me was hurting her.
"Honey...?"
"...I have to end this..." She swallowed, her fingers fidgeting restlessly, trying to find the right place to settle on my arms. "I can't let this go on..."
"Bedlam?" I asked.
"...Yeah... I can wipe it out completely. I can save everyone – save you..." She said, avoiding my eyes as her tone of voice sunk lower.
Something sickly washed over me as we stood in the golden haven. A realisation that made my stomach churn and my lungs cave in. She had Arceus' power, and the ability to wipe Bedlam out – but she hadn't done it yet for a reason. And for all her tears, and the way she was desperately feeling my arms as if trying to memorise every inch, I came to understand her hesitation. To carry out such a task wasn't as simple as it sounded. In reality, it would extract a heavy toll – and as soon as I figured it out, I knew that it wasn't a toll I would be willing to pay.
"No." I said, the breath escaping from my lips as a shudder ricocheted down my spine.
"Huh...?" She looked up.
"No!" I pulled her in and squeezed her tight, jamming my eyes shut as tears began to well up. "No! You're not doing it! There's another way – there has to be another way!"
"T-Toby-"
"NO!" I yelled, nestling my face into her hair, my voice trembling. "You can't...!"
"...But if I don't..." Nelly got as close as she possibly could. "I could lose you... I-I won't let that happen... I can't..."
"But you'll die!" I shook my head.
"I... I-I know..." Her body shook violently in my arms. "B-but... But... I..."
"No! No way!" I refused. "You can't! It doesn't matter anymore – I don't want-"
"I would rather die than lose you too!" She cried, her nails practically digging into my chest.
Her declaration struck me like a ton of bricks. I knew that it was what she had been getting at, but to hear those words actually come from her mouth really cut through the soft, silky strings of my weakened heart.
"D-don't..." I spluttered, grabbing her right wrist in both hands. "Please don't..."
"...I have to..." She sniffed, reaching out and cupping my cheek.
"N-no you don't... You don't..." I cried as the feeling over her hand on my face let loose another wave of tears. They rolled down my cheeks and she stopped them from hitting the ground as she gently caressed the side of my face, her fingertips tracing the outline of my jaw. She slowly worked her way around my head, her fingers sliding into my hair as she reacquainted herself with every detail of my face. "Y-you don't have to save the world..." I croaked. "Not like this... Not if it means you have to go..."
Nelly breathed in, shook her head and leant forward, carefully pulling my head towards her. She lightly pressed her forehead against mine, and the tips of our noses brushed together. Encapsulated by her deep brown eyes for the umpteenth time, she knew she had me under her spell and smiled, despite the fear and pain in her heart.
"...I don't care about saving the world..." She admitted. "Honestly, I... I-I don't want to be the one..."
"Then don't..."
"But I love this world..." Her eyes locked with mine. "I love it because you're in it... So... I have to save it. Because then you'll be safe. That's all I want..."
"Ngh..." I winced.
With fresh tears brewing in her eyes, Nelly tilted her head and kissed me, her lips soft and warm to the touch. It felt like my heart stopped as my body instinctively relaxed, my eyes closing as I kissed her back.
But then my brain quickly went into overdrive, as I desperately tried to think of ways to talk her out of this.
"I don't want you to go..." I swallowed, slowly separating from her. "I-I... If I have to lose you to survive, then... Th-then I don't want to survive...!"
"You don't mean that..." Nelly sniffed. "You're terrified of death..."
"B-but... Everyone is... But... But...!" I gritted my teeth. "I'm more scared of losing you!" I cried. "If you have to die to save the world, then I don't want it to happen! I want you!" I wiped my face. "I don't care how selfish it is – I need you... I need you...!"
"Toby..." Nelly shook her head, her gorgeous hair falling perfectly. "I want you to live... You're all I have left..."
"I don't want to live...!" I clutched at my heart. "Not without you!"
"Gh..." Nelly's lips quivered and she pulled me close again, drawing my head into her chest, where I began to sob like a baby. I helplessly clung to her, my fingers gripping her clothes. With a quiet, defeated whimper at the touch of her hands on my head, I felt years of memories screaming in my head.
"Y-you..." I swallowed, squeezing her tight and burying my face in her chest. "You promised... We promised... We promised that we'd be together forever...!"
"Nnff..." Nelly rested her chin on top of my head and gritted her teeth. "I wanted that more than anything..." She sobbed. "I just... I just wanted to be with you..."
"You're the best thing that's ever happened to me." I spoke through the sobbing. "I-I... I want... To be with you... Forever and ever...!" I shuddered uncontrollably and shifted, wrapping my arms around her frame. "I'm not letting go... I'll never let you go..."
"...I... I don't want you to..." Nelly allowed herself to be pulled in. "I never want to go..."
"Then don't...!" I wailed. "Please – don't! Don't do it if you don't want to...!"
"But I have to... I have to...! I'm not letting you die...! I'm not!" She fought with herself as she hugged me back.
"What if you do it – then what?" I swallowed. "You do it, the world gets saved and you die... Do you think that'd make me happy...?!"
It was terrible of me to try and guilt-trip her, but I was desperate. I just wanted her to stay with me.
"...But you can heal... You can't if you die...!"
"I could never get over losing you!" I shook my head. "Never! I-I would never forgive myself...!"
"Don't say that – you'll be ok..." She squeezed my arm.
"You don't know that..."
"I do... I do know." Her voice trembled, but she seemed like she was finding some sort of resolve. "Trust me... You'll be ok. You won't be lonely – I promise... As long as you don't stop looking for love-"
"H-huh...? What...?" It felt like a bullet through my heart. "Look for love...? You mean... Move on...? No...! No, no!"
"Toby..."
"How could I ever...?" I was dumbfounded at the prospect.
"You're the most amazing boy I've ever met." She held my face again. "Any girl would be lucky to have you..."
"But I don't want 'any girl' – I want you!" I was adamant. "I want you... Nobody else..."
"Please..."
"No... No way... You're the only one for me." I refused to waver. "I love you! I love you so much...!"
"Ahhh..." Nelly sniffled. "I-I really meant it when I said any girl would be lucky to have you..." She nuzzled into my chest. "But I'm the luckiest one..."
"Stay with me..." I begged. "Please... Nelly..."
"...I love the way your chest feels..." She changed the subject. "It's the comfiest pillow I've ever had..." She let out a small laugh.
"Nelly..."
"...You know, when you were little, and you used to have a cuddly to you slept with at night...?"
"...Yeah." I went with wherever she was going.
"...Well that's what it's like now... You're like my big cuddly teddy bear..." She squeezed me. "Except way cuter and cuddlier... And warm... I... I-I... I just wanna go back to bed..."
"Me too..." I nodded slowly, stroking her hair.
"Eheh... No teddy bear I ever used to have would cuddle me back..." She sniffed.
"Stay..." I said again. "Stay with me... I-I'll cuddle you all you want. I promise..."
"...It's tempting..." She smiled.
"Please...? I... I love holding you... I don't wanna have to go to bed without you..."
"P-please stop... You're making it more difficult..."
"Good!" I breathed. "I don't want you to go! You said I was all you had left – well you're all I have! Don't go and leave me behind...! I... At least... At least take me with you..." I said. I had just said that I was willing to die alongside her. I was terrified of the prospect of death, but somehow, despite that grave fear, the thought of having to live my life without her by my side was far, far worse to me. So much so that if she had to go, I wanted to go to.
"No, Toby. Absolutely not..." She shook her head. "You have to live... It's the only reason I'm going to do this..."
"But I don't want to live without you!"
"And I don't want you to die!" Nelly countered.
"Gh..."
It seemed like we were at an impasse. But in reality, she was the one with god-like powers. She could've cut this short a while ago if she had wanted.
"Toby... Do you love me...?" She asked.
"Of course I do..." I looked her in the eyes, and I could visibly see her heart warm up. "I love you more than anything in the world..."
"...You know what they say... If you love someone... Let them go..."
"...But..." I felt defeated. "But if they love you, they'll come back..." I croaked. "If you do this, you... You can't..."
"...Yeah..." She looked down, and gently placed her hand over my heart. "But I'll always be with you."
"...No..." I winced. "No, that's not enough...! I want to be able to see you! To talk to you and hold you – to kiss you and cuddle you... I-I can't do that with memories...!"
"Oh, Sweetheart... You're breaking my heart..." Nelly swallowed.
"Isn't there anything I can do... To make you change your mind...?" I looked at her hopefully.
"...I wish there was..." She replied.
"Nelly..." I held her hand.
"Believe me – there was nothing more I wanted than to be your wife... To have you as my husband – that was my dream..."
"...We can still make it come true..." I said. "We can both live. Some way – somehow...!"
"Truth be told, we've been so close for so long... I've been thinking that if kind of feels like we've already been married for a while now." Nelly smiled, her cheeks reddening.
"...Yeah... I... I never needed a title to know how much I love you." I felt a lump in my throat. "But it was still my dream too..."
"I love you." She came in and kissed me again, and I made sure to savour it, as I held her close and felt the touch of her skin, and the feeling of her soft hair. The way she pressed her body against mine - her distinct breathing and the way her fingers lightly danced across my face -all of it. All of it was part of an experience I never wanted to end.
Eventually, her lips parted from mine, and, still inches from me, she looked into my eyes. For someone with the power of a God, she looked so vulnerable in that moment.
"...This would be the part where I walk away..." She said lightly. "But I... I can't... I just can't..." Her eyes began to water. "I don't want to... I don't wanna go...!"
"Nelly!" I pulled her in and we rested our heads on each other's shoulders. My heart and mind were racing, trying to think of something I could possibly do to make her stay. "...I... There's still so much I never got to say..." I whimpered as tears dripped from my eyes. "So much we never got to do... I... I-I... I never found the right way to tell you how much you mean to me..."
"You silly boy..." She sniffed. "You never had to..." She leant back, her hands on my shoulders. "I've always known. I just hope you know that I love you more than anything – I always have. And I always will..."
"...I know..." I nodded.
"That's my boy..." Nelly whispered, gently pressing her forehead against mine. "I'm so proud of you, Toby..."
"Nelly..."
She reached up and slid her golden pendant up over her head, instead putting it over mine and gently laying the gold chain and heart to rest on my chest. The present I had gotten her all those years ago. It now sat beside the amethyst stone she had given me which I had been wearing for years as well.
"...Huh...?"
"Keep it safe for me, ok?" She smiled, placing the golden heart in my hand.
I closed my fist around it carefully, our fingers brushing together.
"...I will..." I nodded sadly.
"Come here..." She kissed me passionately once more, her fingers intertwined with mine. When I had first met her when we were 12 years old, I could have never imagined how close we would become. Now, she was the light of my life. The one I loved and trusted more than anyone. It often felt like she knew me better than I even knew myself.
It hadn't always been easy. For a while it used to feel like fate was determined to keep us apart early on, but we pushed through every time. And each time, our bond grew stronger. I had been a scared, chubby kid with not a lot going for me when we met. And now, she had helped me to become more confident – at least a little. And she had motivated me to change – both my physical appearance and the way I thought. She had been the biggest positive force in my whole life, and because of her, I had someone to open up to. She was always there for me, and in my heart of hearts, I really hoped that I had done the same for her.
Our embrace came undone, and our eyes locked again. The sparkle in hers was as bright as it had ever been, and I could feel myself falling deeper for her even now.
"I love you..." I told her.
"I love you too..." Nelly replied, quickly kissing me again, then again, stalling for time.
Somewhere far up above, Bedlam was beginning to regain its mobility, as the paralysing effect from Nelly's attack began to wear off.
"No..."
"...This is it..." Nelly breathed. "I'll protect you. I promise..."
"I wish you wouldn't..." I squirmed.
"...I'm so glad I met you." I she told me, her eyes focused on mine.
"Me too..." I sniffled. We were both wet with tears, but all I saw was her beautiful face.
"You're my best friend... I love you..."
"I love you... I'll love you forever and always..." I croaked.
"Always and forever..." She trembled.
With that, Nelly slowly began to back away, but as our hands slid along each other's arms, I grabbed her wrist.
"Hey..."
"Yeah...?"
"I..." I tried my best not to fall apart entirely. "I'll keep the bed warm for you, yeah...?"
"...I'll come kiss you goodnight..." She nodded, the pain on her face driving knives through my heart.
I released her wrist, and, as it fell away, I found myself clutching at her hand, my fingertips locking with hers.
She didn't complain.
"I..." I desperately tried to think of something, but I had nothing. "I... I love you, Nelly..."
"I love you, Toby..." She gave me a warm smile.
Nelly took a single step and our hands separated. The feeling of her fingers falling away made me want to collapse and scream.
She walked to the edge of the dome and placed her hand on the light barrier, preparing to go and end this once and for all.
Before I knew what I was doing, I was running, and I had thrown myself at her, hugging her from behind.
"I love you more than anything!" I wailed. "I love you, I love you, I love you..."
I felt her hand on my head as she turned, and her perfectly soft lips pursed against my cheek.
"I love you too... I love you so, so, so much... You'll always be my hero, Toby..." Nelly kissed me again.
And then, her warm and homely presence was gone. She had passed through the golden dome, Arceus' powers back under her control.
I was left stranded on the inside, my hands up against the wall that might as well have been made of solid rock. There was no way for me to follow her out, as she had trapped me in this indestructible shelter.
I could see her through the light and, though she knew she shouldn't have, she looked back at me.
Our eyes met once more and she fought hard to smile for me, mouthing the words 'I love you'.
A single tear trickled down her cheek as she turned away, and then she took off into the sky.
I staggered backwards, my heart racing and my mind foggy.
"Nelly... Nelly...! Oh God, no...!" I held my head as the waterworks came now with no filter.
Her pendant smacked into my chest as I moved, and I reached down for it, lifting it up. The golden trinket was shining like new. Nelly had clearly cherished it dearly and looked after it well. It looked as clean as the day I had bought it.
"Gh..." I squeezed the pendant tightly, my ring finger brushing against the little switch on the side.
I purposefully flicked it, opening up the heart to reveal the middle.
Inside, cut into the shape of a heart so that it fit perfectly into the pendant, was a picture of Nelly and I from our very first Christmas together.
We were 13 years old, standing hand-in-hand and smiling at each other in front of the fireplace. It looked like Alexis had taken this when we weren't looking.
"Ahhh..." Seeing the picture triggered something deep inside me. A twinge of severe pain, regret and sadness alongside nostalgia and warmth. It hurt. It hurt really bad.
I dropped down onto my knees and held the pendant open in my hands, the sight of it blurry behind my tears. My engagement ring clacked against it and I spluttered, wailing out loud.
The girl of my dreams was going to sacrifice herself for my sake, and I was scared and alone, cradling an early memory while my body regressed into a severe shivering breakdown.
"Nelly..." I sobbed, keeling over onto the grass, my fingers scrunching and ripping it from the soil in frustration. "Nelly...!"
My heart and mind screamed at me as all of my memories of her seemed to be played back instantly in my head, her pretty smiling face and her cute little laugh echoing around my brain. I wanted so hopelessly to hold her hand one more time – to hold her close and shield her from anything and everything. The thought of not being able to hear her voice again – to not be able to go to sleep and wake up with her in my arms again – it all shattered me to a million pieces.
As she soared up into the sky, I let out the most pained and desperate scream of my life.
"NNNNNEEEEEELLYYYYYYY!!!"