Jinji
~ Roninhythe ~
They had been traveling for days and all Jinji could think was, Oh the spirits that man is loud. He was loud when he was awake, talking and talking, until even her short answers caused her voice to run hoarse, and she was in awe that he had sound left in his body. He was loud when he slept, drumming thunder into her ears at all hours of the night, keeping even the animals awake.
Loud.
Loud.
Loud.
And all she wanted to do was quiet him for a mere moment. Even Leoa did not talk so incessantly, dragging on and on. Her friend had known when words were no longer needed, were more of a bother than a comfort.
But not this Rhen, this newworlder who had saved her life only to make her die this slow, intolerable death.
At first, it seemed like a purposeful distraction. The farther they moved from the forest, the deeper the pit in her stomach grew and the louder he seemed to become. Every so often, Jinji would catch him watching her, turning his head up to observe her expression as she rode Ember. And for a while, she even appreciated it. The talking kept her from thinking, from missing, from feeling.
Only two days before, she had turned to watch as the treetops disappeared from eyesight, fading into the green grass of a rolling hill, and in that small, seemingly insignificant moment, her home was gone.
Rhen caught her arm as she slipped from the horse, shock numbing her grip. He continued chatting while her breath grew short, her eyes filled up, her stomach bundled into knots. She couldn’t recall a word he had said, but he didn’t wait for responses anyway. Instead, he pushed on with words that Jinji barely comprehended, yet were somehow enough help.
But now, he continued, battering her with speech she did not want to hear, and all she wondered was if the distraction were really for him, not her.
"Jin?" Rhen nudged her leg, pointing an elbow deep into her thigh to grab her attention.
She looked down, meeting his wide eyes and preserving her voice.
"Did you hear me? I said you can see the city of Roninhythe on the horizon."
She didn’t wait for him to finish and instead darted her eyes ahead, earning a low chuckle.
Her mouth dropped open—that earned a louder chuckle.
There was a stone Jinji used to climb as a child, all the children did—they would dare each other to stand at the top. She could picture it perfectly, dropped in the middle of the forest, almost like some giant creature had casually discarded it amongst the trees. And Jinji remembered staring at the height she had to overcome to end Janu's taunts, wondering how anything other than a tree could grow so tall.
Even so far in the distance, Jinji's breath caught at the sight of this stone city—a patch of gray rising from the green hills, cutting into the sky, angular and unnatural. Ahead of them, a road—also gray, also unnatural.
She looked at the green below Ember's hooves, at the soft warm way the grass cushioned her feet. What would it feel like to walk on something so unforgiving, so tough? Even dirt after a long hot summer baking in the sun had some give, would eventually soften under her feet.
As if called, the elemental spirits danced into her vision, sparkling along the grass in a faded green hue. Looking up, Rhen was still shrouded in a blanket of hot red fire, sparking and spinning around his person.
Above the city, the wind howled, throwing yellow spirits into spirals, weaving webs out and over the walls, spilling back down to disappear from Jinji's vision. The very sight of so much unchallenged air set her on edge. Where were the green spirits, swooping out of the trees to mix with the breeze? Where was the water, dripping down to be caught by the wind, or the heat of a fire, blazing red?
Where was the balance?
It was unnatural.
Jinji shivered, hugging her arms close, for once listening for the rumble of Rhen's voice.
"That road up ahead, we call it the Great Road, it connects all of the original cities to Rayfort, to the king. It was built over the span of one hundred years. For a century, the punishment for disobeying the law was ten years labor on that road. Many were lucky if they survived, and many more considered themselves unlucky for the same fate. But before you test their craftsmanship, which I assure you is quite awe-inspiring, we must stop."
Rhen tugged on Ember's reins, shushing her sighs with long brushstrokes up and down her neck.
"There is something I have not told you," he said quietly, still looking at Ember. Jinji scrunched her eyebrows, waiting. What could he have possibly left unsaid? She knew more history of the kingdom after a few days with him than she had learned in a lifetime.
"I am not who you think I am."
Her fists clenched, her body suddenly tight. A warm pain started in her heart, surprising her with its sting.
He looked up, green eyes piercing hers, deepening the pain. His lips were drawn in a tight line, struggling with what to say.
He couldn't be…he wouldn't just go…
"My name is not Rhen…"
Jinji held her breath.
"It's Whylrhen. And I was not asked to search the forest by the king, I was actually strictly forbidden from leaving Roninhythe."
He looked away, looked back, shrugged.
Jinji tilted her head, waiting for the words he still held back, the ones he was trying to force out. A chill started in her fingers, traveling up her arms, bringing goose bumps to her skin as she looked out to the city. So unnatural, so unfamiliar—what would she do without a guide? Without a friend?
"You see, well…the king is really my father…that is to say, I'm his son." He bit his lip. "I guess that's the same thing really. But what I'm trying to say is, well—"
"You're a prince?" Jinji finished the sentence for him, her voice higher than normal, alarmed.
He nodded, deflated, letting the air out of his body in one big sigh.
Silence hung between them.
Heavy.
Cold.
Jinji looked behind her, searching for the trees, finding none. No familiarity. No comfort. Her breath shortened.
"Are you leaving me?" She asked, forcing the words out, the fear out, as her throat tightened with panic. What would she do? Alone?
"No," he said quickly, putting his hand on her shoulder, squeezing it once. "Of course not, no, Jin, I would never do that to you—not after—you're just a kid. I'm telling you because you deserve to know."
He reached past her into the saddlebag behind her thigh and pulled out a bright red cloth.
Just like the fire spirits, she thought.
"Will you?" He asked, handing it to her.
Jinji reached out, grasping the material. It was soft, thin. She rolled it between her fingers, amazed. Her own clothes, Janu's skins that she still wore, felt coarse in comparison.
Holding it aloft, Jinji realized it was a shirt. Golden threads, the color of the sun on a clear day, were woven through the sleeves. Glittering stones caught her attention and she brought the spot close, gasping at how crystal clear the rocks were.
"Here," he said, tugging on the material, pulling it over his bare chest and handing her the shirt he had just removed. "You might want that."
Jinji looked at the dull brown cloth in her hands, damp with sweat, and wrinkled her nose.
"Why?" She questioned, looking up.
He raised his brows, grinning. A golden speck glistened in his grassy eye, calculating, reflecting some idea sparking in his head.
He shrugged, and it disappeared, decision made. "Never mind," he said, his voice too light, his lips too upturned. He grabbed the shirt, but Jinji held on.
"No, I will wear it," she said, now nervous. He was far too pleased with himself—far too silent.
Shaking his head, Rhen pulled hard, and the shirt slipped from her grasp. In one swift move, he ripped it down the middle, dropping the remains at his feet.
"You know," he said, "in the kingdom you must bow before royalty, on penalty of death. Did the emissary forget to mention that?"
He looked back, smirking.
Jinji slapped the only part of him within reach, his head.
"Hey," he said as he rubbed the spot with his hand, "that actually is punishable by death." He continued massaging his scalp. "For a little thing, you have a good arm. You'll be a good swordsman. I can teach you, you know. I always wanted," he coughed, clearing his throat and looking back to the city. Softer this time, he finished, "I always wanted a little brother to teach…" Rhen looked over his shoulder again, devilish grin back. "But I suppose you'll do, little Jin."
"I'm not so little," Jinji retorted, still unused to being referred to as a boy. Especially by a man who was no more than a few years older than she. "Perhaps you are too large."
Rhen barked out a laugh, loud and sudden, almost echoing on the wind. "No such thing, Jin, no such thing. Just ask the whores."
"Whores?" Jinji didn’t recognize the word.
Rhen shook his head, walking forward toward the road in the distance. "You have so much to learn but…" He tugged on the leather straps, prodding Ember along. "I think I'll enjoy teaching you. Tonight, after the docks, we'll go to the Staggering Vixen, I know a girl named Martha who would love to meet you."
He turned, winked.
A blush rose on Jinji's cheeks as realization hit. Her father had mentioned these women, one of many reasons he forbade her from visiting the stone cities.
"The docks?" She asked, changing the subject, trying to erase it from her thoughts. The Staggering Vixen? She was certain that was not a place she wanted to visit.
Ever.
Jinji looked at the looming city again, swallowing a gulp. It was large, probably full of more people than she could imagine. Maybe she would find a new guide…one not so focused on her education…a woman, maybe.
"We need a ship," Rhen said, interrupting her thoughts.
"Why?"
"How else will we travel to the Golden Isles?"
"Across the sea?" She asked, turning her gaze sharply on him. The wide waters, the great blue expanse, she had only seen it once while traveling with Janu. They had snuck away from the village, exploring, and after two days of walking, they had reached the edge of the forest, the edge of the world. Jinji could still feel the breeze brush her cheeks, could still feel the warmth of Janu's hand as the two of them stood, toes inches over the rock, looking down, down, down toward crashing waves.
Her fingers tightened on the saddle, rubbing harshly against the leather.
"We need to figure out what those Ourthuri were doing here, and there's no better way than stopping in to say hello to their king."
A new guide, Jinji sighed, rubbing her eyes.
She needed to find a new guide.
"I'm going to show you the world, Jin. It's a lot bigger than you realize."
That's what I'm afraid of, Jinji thought and tried to relax in her seat. But the city still loomed ahead, growing larger and larger with each step they took, and it was growing harder to understand if leaving the forest would be any help at all.
Would the shadow still find her behind those tall stonewalls? Would it continue to haunt her? Or would she be discarded, left to live alone, always questioning why and how? Was she traveling toward answers or away from them?
Clicking noises drew Jinji from her thoughts. They had reached the road.
Ahead, she saw travelers scurrying to the side, hastily shifting their horses and possessions to make way. As they walked by, Rhen nodded from side to side, but the people were not looking. Their eyes were downcast. Their entire bodies seemed to bend toward the ground. Only the children dared look up, and it was not at Rhen.
No, it was at her. She felt eyes scan her body, pop open, shocked.
"Is that a…?" One boy asked loudly, only to be quieted by his mother, pulled behind her skirts. But still, he peeked around her large belly, eyes locked on the Arpapajo riding the horse.
Jinji looked ahead, tunneling her vision on the city, trying to ignore the gasps chasing down her ears.
The gates were not far off, wooden slabs breaking up the walls of stone, but they were bolted with metal—nature maybe, but trapped and bound. The doors were open, perhaps welcoming to Rhen, but not to her. To her, they looked like a trap, waiting for the right moment to swallow her whole.
Jinji held her breath as they approached. Behind the walls, more stone, more people, more noise, more movement. More of everything except the one thing she wanted—trees.
"Your Highness," four men said in unison, kneeling down on one leg, nodding in respect to Rhen. He continued walking, waving, but not pausing for anything more.
Jinji gawked at their metal-coated bodies, chinked and chained together, covered by a slight cloth in bright blue over their chest. On the cloth, some sort of beast that she did not recognize in darker blue.
They did not stand again until Ember had passed fully through the gate, and then as one they moved, alert once more.
But Jinji's attention was already elsewhere, on the rows and rows of homes filling her entire line of vision. They were wooden and something else, something that looked like mud, but she knew couldn’t be. They slanted on top of each other, leaning, pulling, held up by a mystery Jinji could not understand. Each one had holes, some sort of material she could see through. Movement flashed, some eyes popped through, meeting her curious stare with one of their own, making her feel not quite so alone in her awe.
The road still held under their feet, hard, but to the side she noticed the mud had returned, catching on people's clothes, the bottoms of their homes, dirtying everything close to it. The people wore clothes that were so different from Rhen's, more like hers, dull and drab to match the dirt.
And it was loud. People screaming to no one, pointing to slabs of food laid out on tables, holding out strips of clothes or items Jinji did not recognize. Girls talking, giggling as their eyes scanned the streets. Children screeching, jumping, running in front of horses in some sort of game. Men boasting, pushing carts, cursing at the crowd.
But like a cloud, silence followed the two of them. Conversations paused, everyone stopped to lower their heads, all the while peeking up under hooded brows to watch Jinji on the horse.
Behind them, noise grew, louder than before, the word Arpapajo crashing like a wave into Jinji's ears. Rhen looked back once, his expression concerned, but that was it. His head scanned slowly from side to side, watching everything.
Keeping her eyes ahead, she finally saw the stone castle, the one Rhen had mentioned, stretching into the sky, almost blocking the sun from her eyes. It was impossible. Yet there it was.
And then it was gone from her sight as Rhen turned them down a narrow road, somewhat vacated.
"Are you alright?" He asked, turning to pet Ember and run a hand through his hair, pushing the reddish locks from his brow.
She nodded, not sure how to express the mix of fear and excitement brewing in her chest. Everything was new, everything was an adventure, everything was terrifying. Taking her hands from the saddle, she flexed her fingers, forcing her blood to pump again.
"You'll get used to it, the staring I mean. Everywhere I go, people look and then just when I get close enough to say hello, they turn, eyes to the ground as is proper. Since I was a boy that's how it's been with the common folk and even some of the nobility." He patted her knee. "You'll get used to it."
But would she?
"I'm sorry I took the shirt," he said, wincing slightly, "I thought it might be funny to see your expression. I wasn't really thinking." He shook his head, blowing out air.
Jinji looked at her dark skin, more out of place in all this gray than it ever had been in the forest contrasted against golden bark.
"I stand out either way," she told him. Her chest felt heavy, as though a fist had closed around her heart. Even in the middle of more people than she had ever seen, Jinji was alone. She swallowed the grief down, forcing her shoulder back, steady. "Besides," she continued, meeting his stare like she would any other stare she came across, "I don't intend to forget who I am."
Rhen paused, considering her.
"Then you're a better man than I am, Jin," he responded, so softly that she almost didn’t hear it.
Then he slapped Ember's behind, earning a nip on his shoulder and a very annoyed sounding neigh. But Rhen just grinned, scratching his horse's ears and pulling them all down the street.
A flash of blue caught her eye, far down where the narrow lane opened up again. The noise grew as they approached. The sun returned, as did the crowd. But Jinji's eyes were still glued to the blue, to the water, chopping and crashing against gigantic wooden structures that somehow floated atop it. Men swinging from ropes. Giant white cloths that looked like clouds against the sky. Squiggling fish caught in nets bigger than her entire village.
"These are the docks." Rhen shrugged, as though this were somehow normal.
"And those are…boats?" She asked, searching for the word.
"Not boats, Jin." Rhen patted her shoulder. "Ships. Big, beautiful ships."
"And this is how we get to the isles?" She asked, wary.
Rhen just nodded as a mirthful smirk sprouted on his lips, birthed from a memory Jinji didn't have access to.
He led them forward through the crowds that parted as they neared, to the beginning of a long wooden row standing over the water, lined with ropes and ships. Tying Ember's reins to an open post, he scanned the area.
"This should do." He nodded. "You can walk around if you'd like, but I wouldn't go very far from Ember. She'll keep you safe, just in case any unfriendly people come near. I should be back shortly."
He waited until Jinji gave her consent before disappearing into the crowd. Once he was gone, she slid from the horse, stepping over the creaking wood, until her eyes dropped over the edge and down into the churning water.
Breathing deeply, she sat, letting her feet dangle over the side as her body began to relax. She imagined she were home, toes dipped into the cool water of their little stream, not feet above the deepest waters she had ever been so close to.
Keeping her eyes downcast, Jinji watched the blues intermix—bright and greenish swirls faded into cloudy gray, warmed into sun-kissed turquoise. All were flecked with bubbling white as they splashed over and under each other, fighting for the top spot. Farther down, the ground faded in and out of view as the waters changed, muddied each other, and then cleared.
Blue strands popped into her vision as the spirits awakened in her eyes, spiraling in and out, braiding and weaving, splashing into the yellow strands of air and then sinking to the green strands of plants below the waters.
Balance.
Nature.
Cupping her hands, Jinji pictured the jinjiajanu between the elemental strands, the pure white mother spirit that tied everything together. And then she imagined a rock resting on her fingers, painted with the faces of her family members.
Closing her eyes, she spun the weave, praying to the spirits to listen to her plea for a moment to mourn, a moment to remember.
When she opened them, the image was there, dancing an inch over her fingers, solid. Four faces—her father, her mother, Leoa, and Janu—all smiling, as though saying hello. She would not forget their faces, ever. And to make sure, she had called this illusion every day since she had left the village. Each time, her throat caught and her eyes burned, but she didn’t look away.
"Ka'shasten," she whispered, my family.
Jinji's heart slowed, her mind began to clear, and for a brief moment, she felt at peace.
And then a shadow passed overhead, skipping over the image, distorting it.
Jinji released the illusion, gasping, and looked up.
A bird.
Just a bird.
And yet, she looked out over the water, following the shadow as it floated over the waves, reminding her of the dream—her nightmare.
A shadow was never just a shadow. Not for her.
"Rhen?" She called, jumping to her feet.
But as she spun around, it was not Rhen standing close by. On the other side of Ember, a few feet from where she stood, two men were in close conversation. Their clothes hung loose on their bodies, dirty and ragged looking. Their skin a deep tan, not born that way but turned that way from hours of exposure in the sun.
They hadn't seen her, were not paying attention.
Jinji leaned in closer, following a hunch that told her this was not a coincidence.
"Dead?" One man asked, shock coloring his words.
"Ay, dead," the other confirmed.
"But how?"
"Another mystery." The second man shrugged. "They found the two of them below deck, one stabbed and the other with a cut throat. No one knows how it happened, or why."
Cut throat?
Maniuk flashed before her eyes, the image of his hand stilled and a blade at his throat. A shadow was never just a shadow, she repeated. This time it was a sign.
"But Georgey? Kill himself? I've never seen a man more at peace on the water, like a fish he was. Always climbing the ropes, securing the sails, never a complaint. He used to say it was as close as a man could get to flying, standing all the way up on the lookout while the wind whipped his face raw."
The other one shook his head. "I guess there was more going on than we knew."
"Ay, something unnatural, something godly, like we're being punished. You heard about the little boy and his sister found just outside the wall not two days ago? I heard rumors her throat was slit too, though the Lord of Roninhythe says the children fell to their deaths."
"Fell to their deaths?" He guffawed, "if they fell, then I'm a Son of Whyl."
The other man laughed. "If you're a Son of Whyl, then I'm the conqueror himself."
"You smell enough like the grave."
They both fell into a loud round of laughter, giving Jinji enough time to crouch down and hide behind Ember's wide body before they noticed her eavesdropping.
"Jin!"
Rhen's voice startled her, coming from the same direction she had just turned from. She straightened her legs, watching as the two men jumped apart, bowing their heads low as he neared. Rhen paid them no attention, walking straight to Ember as they scurried out of the way.
"I found my ship." He smiled, obviously proud of himself. "We leave tomorrow."
"And until then?" She asked, anxiety leaking into her chest.
Rhen winked. "Follow me."
Jinji paid little attention to her surroundings as she followed Rhen down the docks and back to the street. The mud was squishy and wet beneath her feet. Her mind was still on what she had just overheard, wondering if the deaths could somehow be connected—if her shadow was after more than what it had already taken, after more than just her ruin.
She might be closer to answers than she ever realized.
If only she could talk to more people, learn more about these deaths.
But—she looked down at her clothes, at her skin—she was nothing more than something to gawk at to these people. A walking myth. Something to stare at, not talk to.
Looking to the side, she eyed Rhen's profile. His straight, sharp nose. His pearly flesh freckled and kissed only minutely by the sun. His red hair, gleaming brighter against the stone around them. He stood out too, but not nearly as much. And he was powerful amongst these people—it radiated off him. If she asked him for answers, he would find them. It was only a matter of opening up and telling him what she searched for.
But her lips tightened, unsure, holding back.
Now was not the time.
And Jinji wasn't sure when or if she would ever be able to talk about what had happened, with anyone, anywhere.
He met her stare, green eyes sparkling like the surface of the water she had just been studying.
"We're here." He grinned. Her lips tugged wide, a natural reaction to his overflowing glee.
And then she looked above, at the sign hanging overhead. She couldn’t read it, but somehow she knew what it said.
The Staggering Vixen.
Her gut dropped to the floor, the word whore fluttering back to the forefront of her mind.
Rhen tied Ember to a post, flicking a coin into the hands of a skinny boy waiting by the door, who immediately ran inside and emerged seconds later with a bucket of water to place by her hooves. Ember sunk down, licking greedily, and Rhen pushed open the door, letting Jinji enter first.
Holding her breath, she passed him, resisting the urge to close her eyes and walk forward blindly.
But oh, how she wished she had.
As soon as she had crossed the threshold, Jinji was grabbed into an embrace, her face thrust into the largest breasts she had ever seen, while a woman cried out, "What a darling you are!"
Jinji pushed away, careening back and out, immediately crossing her arms over her considerably smaller chest to keep them flattened and contained, as if the mere proximity to the busty women around her would somehow spurn them into growth.
"Martha!" Rhen called behind her, slapping Jinji forward and farther into the room. "An ale for my young friend. And two for me!"
Jinji groaned inwardly as his laughter rang in her ears, loud once more.