Waking up, I feel a gush of fresh air immediately meet with my skin, shivering at the feel of it. I wonder, 'where the fuck am I?' before actually opening my eyes, and seeing Kade's face not too far from my own. Hastily, I hoist myself onto my feet, again wondering where I am.
As I look around me, I'm surprised to find myself surrounded by green. First off, grass is everywhere. If I let my eyes take in the further surroundings, there are trees. Turning around, I notice the road and the town and let out a sigh of relief. Not that Kade would exactly kidnap me. But someone could've kidnapped us both and-
Like a slap in the face, last night’s happenings return to me and immediately a smile enters my face.
“Justin?” Kade’s voice is sleepy, and all of a sudden, he looks a whole lot more cute than I think I’ve ever seen him. Don’t get me wrong, he’s adorable. But to me, he’s by far more the sexy type than the cute type. Yet as he rubs sleep from his eyes, and sits up to stare at me, he looks so innocent that it definitely gives him that cute appearance for a moment.
Then he ruins it. He stands up and as he does so, I can’t help but notice the way his muscles tense as he pushes himself from the ground, and the shirt he wears somehow manages to stay tight enough to show off his abs, making me lick my lips at just the sight of him standing.
Yeah, I don’t know what’s wrong with me either.
As he yawns, he stretches his arms out and somehow something so simple still manages to look amazingly perfect and, okay, just perfect. I swear, right now, I want to kiss him so bad, and as if reading my thoughts, Kade moves closer towards me.
Standing inches away from me, he gradually moves those plump red lips ever-closer to mine, and even I'm not aware of what thoughts pass through my mind, because all I can think is 'Please, hurry up!'. I can't stand this supsense of having him move towards me, and so damned slow.
Finally, he's so, so close, I can barely manage not touching him. His lips near mine and I let my eyes flicker shut, before all of a sudden, I hear a laugh. Not just a little chuckle, but a full-blown, 'this is hilarious' laugh. Personally, I don't see what's so hilarious.
"Fuck you, Kade." I say before turning and storming over to the bike. Damn the boy for being so damned mischievous. But most of all, damn him for being my only way home, unless I want to walk for hours.
"Justin." I can almost see him throwing his hands up into the air in frustration in my mind. But my back is still turned from him, so I can't tell if my suspicions are correct or not. "Justin." His words are softer now, and I wonder how his footsteps were so easily muffled, as I didn't hear him approaching, yet he's suddenly behind me, whispering words into my ear.
"Let's go." Maybe I'm blowing things out of proportion, but it's what I do. And Kade should know that about me by now. Plus, he blows things completely out of proportion a lot of the time.
And so, I move to snatch one of the helmets and put it on, only before I can actually put it on my head, I feel it being taken from my hands and hear the soft thud of it landing on the floor besides our feet. And in a second, I feel Kade's hand wrapping around my upper arm to turn me to face him.
"Justin, I-"
"No. Kade." I interrupt him before taking a deep breath. Inhale, exhale. Say it. "How do I know that you're serious? I mean, you keep doing all this shit, where you just leave me hanging and all I want to do is fucking kiss you! Are you doing it on purpose? Or is this just all some game to you?" I look him in the eyes. "I really, really like you, Kade. I need to know that this isn't just a bunch of lessons, that this is serious. I mean, fuck, we live together! And-"
I'm cut off by his lips furiously crashing into mine, in a kiss that immediately becomes heated. I know it's just a distraction, he's just trying to distract me from the fact that this means nothing. He's not serious about any of this. It's all just a game, a few lessons, nothing more.
But still, I let him kiss me. I let him pry my mouth open with his tongue, and I let him explore my mouth. I let our tongues meet and I let him entangle his fingers within my hair. I let my hands trail up his back, resulting in a shiver on his part, which then results in a shiver from my side too.
For a few moments, I even let myself forget that I'm a person, on Earth. More accurately, on a field, with a road nearby. People could see us. But I can't give two shits as my senses all seem to dim in comparison to the sense of touch. Everything I touch seems to send shivers through me, yet I can't hear a thing, or see anything (not even the darkness behind my eyelids seems to register).
And I don't know how long we stand here and just explore each others mouths with the use of our tongues. But I know that even though he's using this kiss as a distraction, it's a kiss that I really can't help but enjoy and relish in the feel of it. And I can't help but realise that if it were anyone else but Kade, I know I wouldn't be enjoying it so much.
I think that final thought is the one that has me disentangling myself from him. I can't let myself get so into this, as I know this is nothing more than a game to him. He couldn't care less about me. This is just his way of teaching me how to be gay. And I want to slap myself so bad, because the thought actually hurts. It isn't meant to hurt. I'm not meant to care either.
But somewhere along the timeline of this past week and a half, I've let myself care.
"You want to know this is serious?" Kade says, whilst grabbing my arm to stop me from moving away from him. He attempts to rest his forehead against my own, but instead I just turn my head to the side as stands up straight again in defeat, albeit still holding onto my arm.
I'm staring off into the distance, not really paying much attention because I don't know how he's going to let me know this is as serious to him as it is to me. Partially because it clearly isn't as serious to him as it is to me, and partially because I'm very difficult to convince, so why should he even bother trying?
"Justin, look at me." I don't want to. I really, really don't want to. But for some reason, Kade is persistent and takes a hold of my chin, tilting it till I'm looking at him again. I have no where else to look and somehow his piercing blue eyes manage to captivate me so that I can't look away.
Blue eyes stare into brown and I find my heart melting in this very moment. I want him to prove it. Prove he likes me and that he's serious and that this isn't just a bunch of lessons like it appears to be. Prove it, Kade, prove it.
"Justin," he inhales, exhales, shakes his head and says it; "Will you be my boyfriend?"
For a moment, I just stand there, shock no doubt morphing my features to make my face look completely unattractive, but I can't care less, because this boy I really, really like has just asked me the question that I'm pretty sure will change my life forever.
Dating a boy, dating a boy, dating a boy. Yes? No? Well, technically I already know the answer, but it's a big deal. It's- It's dating a boy. Like, actually dating - going out with, being the boyfriend of - another boy. It's a scary deal.
"Justin?" My head whips up and I see Kade looking at me, worry clearly showing on his face. I can practically see the cogs turning in his mind. No doubt, he's wondering if he's done something wrong, if this was a mistake, if I will say no. "Justin, I can, ya know, err, take it back or-"
"No!" He looks heartbroken and it takes me a moment to realise what he thinks I'm implying by that. "I mean, no, don't- don't take it back." I let him comprehend this - in fact, I'm sort of having to comprehend it myself - whilst taking a deep breath. "Yes, I'll be your boyfriend." The words almost sound foreign, yet I like saying them.
Before I have that much of a chance to take in what's happening, it's as if I'm being barricaded into as I feel Kade's body smash into mine, his arms immediately wrapping around me in a huge hug that feels so welcoming. I relish the feel of having his arms around me, never wanting it to end.
He plants a kiss on the crevice between my neck and shoulder, then whispering, "Do you believe me now?"
I whisper back a breathless, "Yes."
When he looks back at me, I can tell he's holding back from saying one thing in particular, so to save him from the trouble of having to say it, I say it myself. "Okay, I get it, lesson number three. Now can we please go back to our romantic moment?"
He beams at me, chuckling slightly before pressing his lips to mine in a kiss that I never want to end.