TRIGGER WARNING: Mention of suicide, suicidal thoughts and self hatred. Please be cautious when proceeding.
After his fourth glass of sangria, Justin was walking through the party looking for Alec or Magnus, and to his luck he found them together, with Maryse and Max. He met up with Jace, and the two went out to the balcony to make the others company.
"How much of you is a demon?" Justin heard Max ask. He cringed at the word demon but decided it was not the time to make a scene out of that. "Max, enough. That's not how we treat our friends," Jace scolded. "Apologize to Magnus."
"You can't tell me what to do," Max argued. "Hey, just because you're getting your first rune doesn't mean you can talk to your brother like that," Alec said. "Jace isn't my brother, he is his brother," Max answered back, pointing at Justin.
"Max!" Alec reprimanded. "Mom says you're not even part of our family." Justin's eyes widened when Max said that. He could feel Jace whole demeanor change at the thought of his mother figure hating him.
Sensing this was a family conversation, Magnus took a hold of Justin's arm and pulled him back inside the apartment, the redhead stumbling over his feet. "I'm gonna go over to the bar and to find Logan, you socialize." Magnus gave him a pointed look before leaving the boy alone in the middle of the room.
He stumbled through the people until he collided with someone. "Fuck, I'm sorry." He calmed down as he recognized the person. "Izzy. You're finally here, where have you been?" Isabelle stared at him in disgust. "Out."
"Are you okay? Did I do something to you?" Isabelle laughed and shook her head. "Wow, you act like you've never done anything wrong in your life, Justin."
The redhead stood baffled at the words coming out of his best friend's mouth. "Yeah, I know I'm not innocent, but I think I've worked pretty hard on not getting into any trouble as of lately," he managed to say, doing a good job at hiding his disappointment.
"True, but you're always bringing trouble to us. How I wish we only found Clary and not you. How I wish we only saved Jace from Valentine."
Justin's heart broke in that moment. Where was everything coming from, he had no idea. But it hit him right in the heart and it was crumbling, breaking into pieces. It hit right where Isabelle knew where his insecurities lay. "You know Izzy, I've lived all my life feeling like a second choice, feeling and knowing I'm not good enough. I don't need you to remind me of something I've always been aware of."
With that, he left a stunned Isabelle standing there, confused about what happened and why did he say that. He left with tears in his eyes and a heartbreak he never thought he would feel.
➰
Justin was minding his own business, wallowing in self-pity, when he saw Magnus, Isabelle, Jace and Maryse run out of the house and to the roof. He furrowed his eyebrows and followed after them to see what everything was about.
He stumbled outside just in time to see Magnus lowering Alec to the ground, unconscious. "What the hell happened?" Justin yelled in question. He ran forward and dropped to the ground beside his boyfriend, caressing his hair.
"All of the sudden, he started talking about how I hated him for killing mom," Clary answered. Justin sighed deeply; he knew Alec still felt guilty about what happened to Jocelyn and was still blaming himself. But it hurt him knowing Alec was having those horrendous thoughts and was willing to talk to him when everything blows over.
Maryse entered running, Magnus explaining what he did and what just transcended. "You know what, you stay away from him. You can't be trusted," Jace told Maryse. Justin frowned, wondering why everyone was acting so strange. "I can't be trusted?"
Maryse turned to Isabelle, "Now you see why I was wary of having a party at Valentine's son's house, and having a warlock help plan it." Justin glared at Maryse, the sadness in his eyes diminishing and being replaced by full on hatred for the woman. He was so focus on what he wanted to do to Maryse that he didn't notice Simon come out.
"You're all gonna be okay. Everyone just stay here. I'll be right back."
Justin continued to caress Alec's hair, waiting for him to wake up and explain what happened. "Get away from my brother," Isabelle spat. "He is my boyfriend and he was trying to kill himself. I want to be with him to see if he's okay," Justin argued.
"You're nothing but trouble, he's here because of you." Justin stood up and walked to stand in front of Isabelle, staring down at her. "Not really, but you think it's my fault because it was my mother, isn't it. Continue telling me how I'm not good enough!"
Isabelle stared at him in disbelief, but he only saw anger. "Don't stay quiet. Say something! You had so much to say back there, don't stop now!"
Everyone was talking over each other, arguing and placing blame that none notice Magnus come back and recite a spell, using his magic over everyone. Suddenly, they stopped. They all looked around each other in confusion, and Justin's eyes soften from his angriness.
"Is?" Isabelle stepped towards him and pulled the redheaded boy into a tight hug. "Don't ever think anything you heard was true, whatever it was." Justin sniffled, nodding his head and cuddling closer to his friend.
They separated when Isabelle noticed Alec starting to wake up. They both got to the ground and started examining the older Shadowhunter for any wounds or anything out of the ordinary. "Someone has taken my spell book," Magnus informed.
Justin stood up, his eyes widened at that. Magnus did his thing and put up the wards around the whole building, prohibiting anyone to get out. "You're putting your wards up?" Clary asked. Justin pushed past everyone, following after Magnus, bothered by the situation. "Nobody leaves until he gets it back."
➰
After searching everyone at the party and figuring out it was Iris cloaked as a redhaired cat, the group were are huddled together in Justin's living room.
"Okay, what is Valentine up to anyway?" Alec was the one to break the silence. "I don't know," Clary answered, looking at Jace. The blond hunter whispered something to her before she sighed. "Jace, they're our family. They need to know."
"Know what?" Isabelle questioned the pair. "The angel Ithuriel," Clary started. "Valentine was going to use him to activate the Soul-Sword. He needs someone with pure angel blood to activate it."
"Well, that doesn't sound good," Simon commented. "It's not. With the Soul-Sword activated, Valentine can decimate the entire Downworld," Jace continued. "The angel showed us a vision of a demon who could destroy the Sword. If we can find that demon, we could stop Valentine."
Magnus was concerned for something far greater than the activation of the Soul-Sword, and his face said it all. "How did you two save the angel?" Clary and Jace looked at each other once again.
"With runes the angel gave to me," she answered, sighing. "What now?" Justin asked. "New runes. Ones no one's ever seen before."
"Why did he choose you?" Isabelle questioned Clary. "I have no idea." The tone of her voice sounded so sincere Justin couldn't be mad at being the second choice, again.
"I might."
Everyone turned to look at Magnus after his confession. With everyone's attention on him he started speaking. "Years ago, a Silent Brother told me about a special connection the original Shadowhunters had with the Angel Raziel. That they could communicate from afar through... visions. Because they were created from his blood."
"Are you saying that..." Alec wasn't able to finish his sentence when Magnus spoke once again. "Clary may have a blood connection to that Angel. And that must mean she has pure angel blood."
"That's why Valentine wants Clary unharmed. Clary can activate the Soul-Sword."