It was dawning when Mark entered the frontdoor, the house was still dim lit. He walked upstairs with his hands on his pockets, and when he’s already at the last step, his eyes landed at the portrait on the wall by the end of the staircase. It was of a woman, maybe taken in her early twenties. Mark took a step closer and stared at it. The woman's calm facial expression made her seems so elegant and gentle. The melancholic look in her eyes brought back a distant memory from those hazy days Mark remebered so well.
It was an early morning, back to the summer of when he was just barely 8 years old. He woke up to a familiar sound so he quickly jumped out of bed and ran downstairs. He saw her mom playing the piano, her dainty fingers gliding on each key.
“Mom” he shouted as he ran to hug her.
“Hey baby” she hugged him back before kissing him on his forehead. “Did you sleep well?”
“Yeah” he answered eagerly.
She smiled at him as she was gently combing his hair with his hands. “Lets eat breakfast”. She said as soon as she was satisfied with how it looked. She held his hand before standing up. "Come"
They were about to walk to the dining area when the front door opened reaveling his father who was holding hands with his mistress as they were smiling at each other flirtatiously.
His mom was frozen for a bit but she maintained her composure. She held her little boy's hand tightly and continued walking to the dining room as if she didn't just saw his husband flirting with another woman.
When they reached the dining room, his older brother was already there solemnly eating his breakfast.
"Good morning" he greeted as soon as he saw them.
"Good morning P'Saint" Mark greeted back. On the other hand, his mother acted like he didnt hear anything and proceeded to the kitchen.
Mark sat adjacent to his older brother but when his mom came back, she told him to sit with her on the opposite side of the table.
"Don't talk to him" her mom said as soon as his brother finished eating and left the room.
"But why mom?" he wondered.
"Because he's evil" she replied seriously.
"P'Saint is nice. He always help me when I need him" Mark reasoned.
"They will take your father away from us" her voice was cold and stern.
"But..." he decided not to continue his sentence when he saw his mom's angry expression. "Ok". He sighed before he continued eating.
After breakfast her mom prepared a basket full of food and they headed out to the beach.
He was so excited when they arrived that he immediately jumped into the water. His mom laid the blanket on the sand and placed the basket on the side. She sat in the middle and happily admired his little boy who looked so happy as he played with the saltwater. Mark gazed at her with his eyes filled with innocence and his bright smile which seemed like it can lighten up the whole world. Her whole world at least.
Those were just fragments of the past. Now Mark was standing in front of his mother's portrait, tears threatening to spill. The genuine smile of that once innocent little boy was gone.
"Good morning" a familiar voice he hated so much snapped him out of his trance. "Are you okay?". He sounded concerned but Mark was deaf to it.
"Why do you care?" Mark's tone was full of sarcasm. He looked at the man with eyes filled with rage.
"Because I'm your brother" he replied.
"You're not, Saint. Were not even related by any means"
"Maybe not by blood but still, I consider you as my brother"
"You and your whore of a mother killed my mom" Mark's voice overflowed with anger.
"She committed...suicide". Saint spoke the last word in a low voice, almost a whisper.
"You forced her" Mark yelled in frustration. His voice echoed inside the house. "Just fucking leave me alone".
Mark walked past him, his body filled with rage. Saint was left standing there, looking at him as he disappears into his bedroom.
Mark locked the door before walking straight into his bathroom to maybe try and cool off his anger. But when he closed his eyes to wash his face in the sink, the image of his lifeless mother bathing in her own blood was haunting him.
He still can't forget the day that he learned the truth about himself. It was a rainy afternoon, he just came home from school. He was so excited to show his mom and dad and also his brother the perfect score that he got in Math. He was about to knock on his parents' door when he heard them shouting. He tried turning the knob to open it but it was locked. He had no choice but to wait for them to finish arguing. They were always arguing these days.
He was sitting in front of the door when he heard his name being mentioned. It was never his nature to eavesdrop but hearing his name awakens his curiosity. So he stuck his right ear on the door and listened to their conversation.
"Stop with this bullshit and know your place Waen. You know the only reason I haven't kicked you out of this house yet is because I don't want people to know that my marriage is a failure, and my wife fucked onother guy so she can get pregnant" his father's words were piercing.
Mark was frozen, tears started gathering at the corners of his eyes. That explains why his father doesn't really pay attention to him. He never heard him say I love you, not even once, how could he when he barely even talks to his son. His father acts like he doesn't belong in this family and that's because he really isn't part of it.
"I can't take this anymore. If you won't do it then were leaving" his mom was obviously crying with the way her voice trembled.
"No one's leaving this house you understand me? Saint and Nom will stay here with you and Mark. Dont do stupid things Waen, I'll make you regret it".
"You know its you whose infertile. Saint can't be your so...." Her words were cut off. Mark heard a loud slapping noise and her mother's crying intensified. "I should've divorced you ten years ago when you brought that filthy woman in this house"
"If you don't shut your mouth Waen I will fucking kill you, just like I did to that bastard you cheated me with"
That was it, Mark can't hear no more because his tears wont stop falling and its getting harder to breathe. He quickly ran to his room and locked the door before burying his face in the pillows. Although the topic was too complicated for a 9 years old like him, Mark understands all of it because Mark was a smart kid.
That day Mark cried and cried and cried but when his mother asked him what happened, he just told her he got zero in math.
The next thing Mark knew was waking up with his mother laying beside him, just like she always do. But this time she was cold and devoid of life. Her wrist slit vertically, blood staining the bedsheets.
His world crumbled right there and then. His mother was the only person who made him feel like home, she was his home. Without her, Mark was left alone, lost and wandering. Will he ever find a new home? Who knows?
As for now, Mark was still lost. He opened his eyes and saw his reflection in the mirror. The anger in his eyes reflected the gehenna inside of him. He looked awful and he hates it.The sun was already up but Mark haven't slept yet. His body was tired and he's a little bit dizzy with all the things that's going on inside his head. He needs to sleep and maybe then he'll be able to see her once again.
It was quarter to three when Mark woke up from a dream-less sleep. He checked his phone and saw multiple missed calls and text messages from Kris.
'Pick up'. 'Where are you? We have a problem'. 'Come over', were some of the messages he sent.
Mark took a quick shower and within 30 minutes, he was already knocking at Kris' house. Kris opened the door for him.
"Shhh". He hushed and eyed his mother and older brother who were kneeling in front of the small altar at the corner of the living room. Mark raised his eyebrow but continued silently walking inside. "Its the hour of Mercy. Be quite". He said before slowly closing the door behind them.
"What are they doing?" Mark asked as soon as they were inside Kris' room.
"The 3 o'clock prayer" Kris replied.
"Oh I have no idea about that. Anyway, is your brother okay?"
Kris smirked. "Concerned much?"
"Already with this conversation. Wow" Mark rolled his eyes as he sigh exagerratedly.
Kris displayed a sly smile before sitting in front of his computer. "Well I don't know if he's already okay or mom just forced him to pray with her. But I already talked to him about last night and he was convinced he's just having delusions". He explained to which Mark just nodded.
Kris started his computer. "Look at this" he commanded in all seriousness.
Mark stood behind him, eyes on the computer.
"Mr. Gambling is life set himself on fire" Kris stated and Mark's eyebrows knitted together.
"Suicide is just normal in our clients. What's the big deal?"
"The big deal is that his families were gone. His wife, his three children, they disappeared in the broad daylight. If it was just a common suicide case it would be easy for us but it was self immolation and it caught so much attention" Kris explained.
"How do they disappear in broad daylight? Its impossible that no one saw them leaving"
"That's the problem. Their house is in full lockdown and police were all over the place to find clues about the suicide and disappearance. Your men can't get inside to retrieve possible evidences that might point us"
"This is ridiculous. He haven't even paid half of his debt"
"Money is not really our problem right now. One of the police said Mr. Gambling is life reported an extortion case but dropped it suddenly like he's getting threatened. He said that he still have the pictures of the two possible extortionists and that might be us". Kris sighed before continuing. "If only this guy committed suicide in a normal, I mean common way and his family did not disappear, we can just easily go to Plan B; infiltrate his house, take all the papers containing our business transactions, and sell his property. EZ"
"Worry not my brother, for we have police access" Mark said laughing. "I thought we have bigger problem that this"
"We have police access?" Kris sounds relieved.
"Of course. How do you think I'm able to run this business for so long? I have my ways" Mark smirked. He went to lay at Kris' bed.
"What else are you not telling me?"
"Nothing that of necessary"
"This little shit" Kris rolled his eyes.
"I'm hungry. I'll go grab some foods, wanna come?" Mark stood up, walking straight to the door.
"Sure, and drop me at Nam's house after. We have a score to settle" Kris had a playful smile. He took a denim jacket before following Mark outside. Kris saw him standing on the bottom stairs, not moving.
"Hey what are you doing?" He asked. "Just go ahead"
"Your mom is arguing at the door. I don't want to interrupt" Mark replied, eyes still focused on the front door.
Kris walked past him, he saw his mother arguing with someone on the door.
"You destroyed my life. How dare you show your face to me again" Her mother's words were full of resentment.
"Lets not make this any more complicated Ada" the man was trying to appear calm and collected, but his expressions shows that he's losing his temper.
"Who are you and what do you need with my mom?" Kris can't just stand there and watch at how his mom was becoming uncomfortable with the unkwon man.
"Is this him?" The man asked looking at Kris.
"No. Absolutely not. Leave us alone" she replied aggressively.
"Look. I know you're just forced to keep him so just give him back and you won't see me again. You'll have the normal, decent, morally upright family type of shit that you always hope for" the man sounded confident to which his mother was taken aback. She was thinking.
"What do you mean? Who are you talking about? Who are you?" Kris asked one after the other.
"Who knows? I might be your father" the man plastered a devilish grin before walking away. "I'll be back" he said before disappearing into the wooden gate.
"What was that mom?" Kris asked in confusion.
"Nothing" she tried avoiding eye contact.
"Who was that? Answer me" Kris was becoming impatient. Her mom flinched with the tone of his voice.
"I..its your brother's father" she replied stuttering.
"The one who raped you?" Kris was shocked. "Why is he still out here? He should be in jail" he was frustrated.
"I didn't tell the police"
"Why?" Kris was overly conflicted.
"Please lets not talk about this" his mom turned her back and walked to the kitchen.
"Okay. But dont tell me you're giving him P'Gun?" Kris asked.
His mother took her time before replying an unsure "No".
Kris sighed before walking out of the door Mark was about to follow him when he realized he forgot his car keys on Kris's room. He was descending upstairs when he saw Gun at the end of the staircase. He met his eyes as it bleeds the salt of his soul, shoulders dropped in resignation. Mark's heart ached at the sight, he walked towards him and held him in a protective embrace. He doesn't know why he did that but it felt good, at that moment it felt right.
"Thank you, but I'm okay" Gun said, hiccuping as soon as Mark let him go. "I'm sorry that you always have to see me like this. I never meant to be this weak".He tried his best to smile, but his streams of tears kept on flowing.
"No. Its okay. I think you're strong enough to admit your flaws and weakness. It takes a lot" Mark was unsure where he get those cheesy lines but seeing how Gun's tears starts ceasing and the way his eyes glisten was enough for him. If Gun was the Ocean, Mark might get drowned in it.
"Thanks. I'm happy that my brother found a good friend like you. He was so lucky" Gun said while wiping his tears. The forced smile he had earlier was now turning into a genuine one.
Mark just smiled. This guy doesn't have an idea how filthy Mark was. Well technically he does, he just forgot about it. But nonetheless, Mark found happiness at the thought that someone still believes that he's a good person. That someone appreciates his kindness and not just his handsome face and what's inside his wallet.
There's this unknown feeling inside him. Was it love? Was it sympathy? Was it just a curiosity? He doesnt bother to know exactly, all he knows is that it gets stronger everytime their eyes met and somewhat, despite not liking new things,
Mark was completely embracing it.