"The Heart of a Wildflower"
2012 All Rights Reserved
Chapter 13
“Turn it off,” Elizabeth mumbled into her the recesses of her pillow. She was still half asleep when the first set of annoying beeps from her phone began to go off and initially woke her up. She couldn’t find it within herself at the moment to get up and do anything about it.
For five more minutes she was blessed with sweet silence and then it happened again. The phone beeped what she thought was louder signaling that she had a text, and she knew it would continue to beep until she finally dragged her butt about of bed and did one of two things. She could read the text or turn the phone off altogether. Turning the phone off was looking like a really good plan right about now.
Knowing what she had to do Elizabeth groaned and tried to sit up. It was only then she realized that a heavy weight was pinning her down to the bed. Confused, she and startled she froze wondering what in the world was holding her down.
“Lizzie? What’s wrong?” Zeb’s sleep filled voice sounded from beside her. The bed moved and Elizabeth turned her head so that she was staring straight into a set of beautiful icy, blue bedroom eyes.
He smiled and the memories from the night before all came rushing back at her; every last glorious one of them. She remembered the way that he felt moving inside of her, covering her body and driving her to one mind-blowing orgasm after the other. It was heavenly. It was wonderful. It was perfect.
Just like the first time they spent together. And by the way that Zeb was grinning silly at her, she was pretty sure that she was glowing something fierce in the aftermath of their bedroom activities from the night before.
Her short lived high didn’t last long though. On the cloud nine scale it dropped from a 10 to a .5 in less than half a second when she remembered something else from the night before. Something that should have been extremely important but in the heat of passion they both forgot.
A condom.
In all the times that they made love through the night and into early morning neither one of them had once thought to use any sort of protection to prevent another pregnancy.
This was going to turn out to be her final downfall. It was like her high school graduation happening all over again except this time she was going to lose so much more than just a child and her heart. This time she would lose her soul.
Elizabeth slapped her palms over her eyes and fell back against the pillow wishing with everything that she had in her that there was a redo button. "How could I have been so stupid?”
Zeb pushed himself up on his elbows and she could feel him hovering just above her face. “What? What’s wrong?” he asked her again. This time there was a sincere concern that she wasn’t used to hearing inserted in his voice. From the way he sounded, he didn’t have a clue as to the ramifications of what they had done and she wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
Slowly she felt Zeb’s hands take hers and pull them down from her face. At first she didn’t want to face him but then she thought that was just plain stupid. She opened her eyes and looked up at him; struggling like crazy to not get lost in the depths of those shimmering, sapphire orbs. This time, she was determined to be an adult around the situation and deal with whatever happened as such. She wasn’t an innocent, naïve eighteen year old any more.
"We didn't use protection," she rambled. “And I don’t usually do this kind of thing. I’m not on birth control or protected in any way.”
Zeb squeezed her hands together and brought them up to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to both of them. She looked so damn cute right now with that rounded pout on her lips and her hair sticking out every which way from their combined lovemaking and sleep. He was tempted to take her again, right here, right now, just like this. Now wasn’t the time though. He could read that much in her expression. Clamping down on his urges Zeb forced himself to hold back.
"It’s alright baby? What we did last night was wonderful and I plan to do it for many more nights to come. It’s not a big deal.”
Elizabeth shot herself straight up into a sitting position, jerking her hands away from Zeb so fast that one would have thought she had been burned. She could feel her temper rising. Did he seriously just say that sex without protection isn’t a big deal? Who was he kidding? Sex without protection is a huge deal. The last time that she found herself in this position, she ended up alone and pregnant. Nine months later she was forced to give up a child that she was, by no means, fit to care for. At the same time she was forced to give up a big part of her heart.
"Big deal! You're damn right this is big deal Zeb Crooker!” Now she was yelling at him. “Don’t you know what happens when two people have sex without protection?”
Zeb struggled not to laugh. When she sat up, the sheet slipped fluidly to her lap and her bare breast perked up for him. His eyes flitted to the dusty rose colored nipples that seemed to be begging for his attention before he glanced back up at her angry eyes.
Sighing, he realized then she was being serious. The fact they had sex without protection was really upsetting her. Women, he thought to himself. They should come with a ‘handle with care’ label. He needed to get her to calm down. She was upsetting herself and there was no need. Not anymore.
Zeb started to scoot next to her, intent to wrap her up in his arms when she surprised by him by jumping up out of the bed looking every inch of breathtaking Goddess in her gorgeous nude state.
“In case that hard head of yours hasn’t figured it out yet, it means babies, Zeb. We could have made a baby last night.” Unable to stand still she started to pace the length of the bed. What was she going to do if she turned up pregnant? Again!
Zeb pushed himself all the way up and relaxed against the headboard. His eyes followed Elizabeth’s every movement. “If that was to happen, then it would make me the happiest man on Earth.”
Hearing his words, she stopped and whirled around, crossing her arms under her breasts which only pushed them up and out further. “Oh no you don’t buddy. You have only been back in town for a week. You can't just come home, declare you love me after six years and then try to knock me up. It doesn’t work like that."
Zeb narrowed his eyes on Elizabeth and took his time as he rose from the bed in all his masculine glory and as well as impressively aroused. He stalked around the edge of the bed, looking very much like the predator he was trained to be and stopped only when he towered over Elizabeth. Without an ounce of hesitation he grabbed her by the hips and pulled her small body against his. Skin to skin. Heat to heat. Heart to heart.
"I can Elizabeth and I will. I told you the first day I saw you that you were my woman and I meant it. I spent six of the longest damn years of my life out in a hot desert waiting for the end to come. In all those years my only comfort was in the fact that I knew when my time was up that I would be coming back home to you. You baby. It was you and only you that kept me going.”
Pausing, he bent down and pressed his nose to her hair, breathing in deeply her sweet scent. Six damn years he waited to come back to this woman and finally, she was here, in his arms. He wasn’t letting go. “Face it Lizzie, neither of us is getting any younger so why should we wait to start our own little family? We could have a little girl as pretty as you or a little boy as mischievous me. Having babies with me isn’t that bad to think about, is it?"
At the mention of family and babies, all of the walls that Elizabeth had worked so hard to build over the years quaked and threatened to crumble at her feet. Images of Brandon assaulted her mind. Flashes of the few minutes she got to see him as a newborn and flashes of the blond haired, blue eyed little boy she helped treat at the hospital. It was all too much for her to bear.
With the roller coaster of emotions coursing through her, she couldn’t let Zeb know how much the thought of any baby with him actually hurt. Unable to speak, she burrowed her head into the crook of his shoulder and squeezed her eyes tightly in a half hearted effort to hold back the tears.
He must have sensed her mood because the next thing Elizabeth knew Zeb was rubbing her back and cooing in her ear soft reassurances that everything was going to be okay.
After several minutes of this; the two of them standing together in each others arms, and with him holding her up; all the fight just drained out of her. She was done. What’s done is done. She was but a slave to her heart and Zeb was her master.
Elizabeth was content to let Zeb hold her, for a little while anyway. She soaked up his strength and reveled in his warmth. Never before had she ever had anyone in her life to lean on like this and she was reluctant to give it up. That is, until she heard that same dang beeping noise that woke her up to begin with.
“My phone!” She jumped back out of his arms and instantly felt her skin chill with the loss of Zeb’s comfortable heat surrounding her.
“Huh?”
“My phone,” she repeated already walking over to the dresser where she had left it the night before. “Someone keeps texting me. That’s what the beeping sound is.”
She picked up the phone and started to read through the screens. “Oh crap,” she mumbled to herself and quickly thumbed out a reply message. “I almost forgot.”
“Forgot what?” Zeb asked sitting back down on the edge of the bed. He seemed to be completely comfortable in his nude state and was immensely enjoying the fact that Elizabeth didn’t seem inhibited by her striped state either. He watched her walk into the closet, her body moving with the easy grace fluid of a swan. God! She was gorgeous, he thought to himself.
"Lunch at Moms. I forgot that I told her I would come by today." She replied, her voice muffled by the closet.
"Mm, sounds like fun,” Zeb smiled and leaned back on the bed. “What time are we going?"
She froze. Oh no, she was not about to take him over to her mama’s house. No way! No how!
She could barely handle Zeb when it was just the two of them; there was no way she would attempt to deal with him in the presence of her mother. Her mama has been after her for years about finding a “good husband’ to settle down and make a family with. And Zeb Crooker most definitely did not qualify as that kind of man. Zeb was a heartbreak waiting to happen.
“Elizabeth?”
Shaking her head she buttoned up her jeans and stuck her head out of the closet. “We are going nowhere Zeb. I’m going to my mother’s and you-- well you’re going home.”
Zeb pushed himself up from the bed and stood. “Darling, I hate to be the one to break it to you but after what we shared last night, I’m not going anywhere unless its with you. So,” he said laying his hands up on his hips, “we can do this the easy way where you say okay like a good little girl, or we can do this the hard way and I’ll just throw you over my shoulders and drive you over there myself. I kind of like the idea of putting you over my shoulders because that means one hand is on your sweet, round bottom and the other is,” he grinned mischievously, “I think you get the picture.”
Elizabeth scowled in the passenger seat of Zeb’s mustang. She couldn’t believe how he had threatened her. The worst part of it was that she knew he wasn’t bluffing either. He would have picked her up and carried her if she refused to let him go.
She peeked out of the corner of her eye and had the incredible urge to smack that silly grin off of his face. He just sat there grinning like he was on top of the world. She thought back to the smoldering kisses he gave her when she finally agreed to let him come with her. In less than a minute he had her begging for much more than his kisses. And the dumb klutz had the balls to deny her. He claimed he needed to shower so they wouldn’t be late. Now she was not only pissed off, she was aroused, too.
She snorted out loud and turned away from him. That man and his damn kisses; he knew exactly what he was doing when he put those sinful lips to work on her.
“Aw, come on Lizzie. Smile a little. We’re going to have a nice Sunday lunch with your mom. It can’t be that bad, can it?”
She didn’t bother to look at him. Instead she crossed her legs together hoping to ease a little bit of the tension that he caused between her thighs and muttered, “That’s what you think. You don’t know my mom. She’s worse than the interrogators were at the Great Spanish Inquisition.”
His booming laughter suddenly filled that car, and damn it, it happened again. The man's strange yet highly appealing warmth washed over her leaving her with a dream like feeling. It was a special warmth like she had never felt before and a warmth that she was fast becoming addicted to. It made her insides flutter with anticipation and her heart rate jump. She fought to hide the ridiculous that threatened to break through her composure.
As they pulled up in front of the one story cottage style house, Elizabeth couldn’t help but notice how it still looked the exact same as it did when she was just a little girl. The exterior of the house was painted a pale yellow with blue shutters and a red roof. It wasn’t a big house but it wasn’t necessarily small either. It had always just been home to her.
At least until her mama found out about her unplanned pregnancy. When she told her mother what happened, her mother couldn’t handle the news. Besides the fact that Elizabeth was going to be an unwed mother,, she couldn’t understand why she wouldn’t name the father of her bastard child. Her mother kicked her out of the house in an attempt to get her to fess up but it hadn't worked. Elizabeth left and for two years, she didn't look back.
Luckily, Dr. Mayberry who had already confirmed her pregnancy took her in. He treated her as a daughter and helped her through all the bad times. He was there for Brandon’s birth and had even helped her set up the adoption. He had been a Godsend when she was ready to give up on life.
At the end of the two years, Denise reached out and Elizabeth started to talk to her mother again. At first it was a hairy situation filled with tension, but gradually they seemed to reconnect on a basic level. Her pregnancy was a taboo subject that neither of them spoke about. Elizabeth knew that she hurt her mother badly with her poor choices and bad decisions. She was just glad that they were able to speak to each other again.
“A penny for your thoughts?” Zeb lightly squeezed Elizabeth's thigh to get her attention. He had parked and cut the ignition but hadn’t made any moves to get out of the car yet.
“Just thinking,” she told him.
“Thinking about what?”
“The past. I was born in this house, you know. And well, I was just thinking about how things began here and-“ she paused before she said something that she wasn’t ready to say and shook her head. “Never mind.” Frustrated, she opened the passenger door and stepped out into the balmy summer air. “Come on," she told him, "but don’t say I didn’t warn you. My mama isn’t any different than any other mama out there.”
Zeb joined her outside the car and grabbed her hand. “And what is that supposed to mean? I imagine she is just as beautiful and as smart as you are.”
Elizabeth threw her head back and laughed. “Now that is funny.”
“What?”
When they reached the bottom step Elizabeth held up her hand to him. “I'm not saying anything else. You’ll just have to wait and see for yourself.”
On cue, the screen door opened with a wiry screech and Denise Zellar stepped out on the porch. Her silver hair was all tightly pinned back in a prim bun and her grey-blue eyes crinkled when she noticed the large man standing at Elizabeth’s side.
Zeb took the initiative and stepped forward offering her his hand. “Good afternoon ma’am. My name is Zeb Crooker. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” He replied with all the charm of a purebred southern Prince. “You have a lovely home.”
Denise glanced over at Elizabeth and beamed. Her full fledged approval was written all over her face. Elizabeth had a feeling that this was going to be one really, long lunch.
Denise took the offered hand and shook it reverently. “Well Mr. Crooker, it’s nice to meet you, too. It’s been a long time since I last had a man in my house. Not since my dear Henry’s death.” She looked up at the heavens and placed her hand over her heart before adding, “God rest his weary soul.” After taking a deep breath and exhaling, she dropped her hand to her side and went to open the screen door for her guests. “Don’t just stand there. Come on in, make yourself at home. I hope you like fried chicken and potato salad. I have plenty for everyone and it’s already on the table.”
“Yes ma’am. I happen to love fried chicken and potato salad. My mom used to make it on Sunday’s when I was a kid. It’s been awhile since I had a taste of home cooking.” Zeb placed his hand at the small of Elizabeth’s back and led her into the house. He made sure to crowd her space and when Denise strode past them, disappearing in the kitchen he reached down and pinched her butt.
“Ow!” Elizabeth shrieked and jumped back at the same time. She turned around and glared at Zeb while rubbing the sore spot on her ass. “Behave!”
Zeb put his hands behind his back trying to appear innocent. “Never!”
“Lizzie, can you get the plates from the cabinets?” Denise's voice echoed from the kitchen.
She stared hard at Zeb, silently daring him to do something to make her day. When he didn’t move she turned around, lifted her chin up in the air and headed for the kitchen. “Sure thing mama, I’m coming.”
Several minutes later Elizabeth was busy at the cabinet pulling out the plates when Zeb waltzed into the kitchen sniffing appreciatively. “Something sure smells good,” he remarked.
Denise pivoted, drying her hands on the black and white checkered apron that she wore around her waist. “That would be lunch.”
“Is there anything that I can help out with, Ms. Zellar?”
Elizabeth scrunched up her nose at his gentlemanly behavior. It was obvious that her mama was falling for his charm- hook, line and sinker.
“No, dear. I wouldn’t think of asking you to do anything other than to come over here and have a seat at the table. You’re our guest.” Denise pulled the chair out for him and insisted that he do just as she told him to do. It was obvious that she wasn’t going to take no for an answer.
Before he sat down he glanced over at Elizabeth and she shrugged helplessly at him while carefully setting out three china plates on the table.
“Yes ma’am,” he replied respectively and made his way to the other side of the table. He waited for both Denise and Elizabeth to take their seats before he finally sat down.
Denise sat beside of Zeb which put Elizabeth and Zeb sitting directly across from each other. She glanced at both of them and held up her hands. “Shall we say grace? “
Zeb took one hand and Elizabeth took the other. Elizabeth closed her eyes and waited for the words of the same blessing that she heard before every meal while growing up. She knew them well.
“O Lord, we thank you for the gifts of your bounty which we enjoy at this table. As you have provided for us in the past, so may you sustain us throughout our lives. While we enjoy your gifts, may we never forget the needy and those in want, Amen.”
Elizabeth felt eyes on her. When her mother closed with the final “Amen,” she glanced up and across the table Zeb was watching her intently.
Feeling the heat turn up in her blood and the blush rise in her cheeks, she quickly turned away only to meet her mother’s knowing smile.
Internally, she groaned. She knew the questions would come followed closely by the insinuations. Her mother knew how to pitch a sale, and by the end of lunch she was sure that she would pitch her best one to Zeb on what a ‘good wife’ she would be.
Not!
She didn’t want to think about it. Instead she turned to the meal in front of her and heartily dug in.
She hadn’t realized how hungry she was until she actually started to eat. The chicken melted in her mouth and the potato salad tasted divine. This was a hell of alot better than the Lean Cuisine frozen dinners she was accustomed to having at home.
“Mr. Crooker?” Elizabeth heard the clink of metal when her mother put her fork down and wanted to bang her head against the table. Here we go she thought dryly. Let the questioning begin. "Tell me, how did you meet Elizabeth?”
Zeb glanced up at Elizabeth and picked up a napkin to wipe his mouth. The laughter in his eyes had her belly cart wheeling all over the place. Jerking her gaze away from him, she shoved another hearty spoonful of potato salad in her mouth.
“To tell you the truth ma’am, Lizzie and I went to highschool together.” He said very matter of factly.
“Oh, but I don’t recall seeing you around town recently,” Denise said thoughtfully.
He chuckled. “No, I don’t suppose you have ma’am. You see, I’ve been overseas serving my country for the last six years. I just returned home for good earlier in the week and I reconnected with Lizzie at Bobby’s Garage.’
Denise’s eyes grew wide. “Really, that is fascinating," she praised. "First off, I want to personally thank you for serving our country so bravely. That’s shows a lot of heart and a lot of dedication for you to take six years of your life and commit them to preserving our freedom. Those are both good qualities that I value highly in a person.”
Elizabeth noticed how she stared up at him with hero worship in her eyes. She looked thoroughly and completely enchanted.
But it was Zeb’s reaction that caught her off guard. He surprised her yet again. He bowed his head humbly and stared blankly at his half eaten dinner plate. “It was my honor ma’am. There is no need to thank me for just doing my job.”
“That’s absolute nonsense.” Denise reached over and patted his hand. “You’re a hero son; a true, honest to God hero.”
Zeb didn’t respond to that. Instead he continued to stare at his plate while a flood of emotions flashed across of his face. If Elizabeth didn’t know better, she would just about bet that he was remembering something; and by the shadowed look in his eyes she didn’t think that something was very pleasant. She heard stories about soldiers when they returned home and now she wondered what Zeb’s story was. She wondered what happened to him during those six years that would cause him to look so sad.
Denise must have sensed the mood because she shifted the conversation topic back to more general questions. Just like a drill sergeant she proceeded to delve them out one after the other.
Zeb took it all in stride and his dark mood lifted just as quickly. He was back to the easygoing Prince Charming that everyone tended to fall in love with.
“Lizzie, would you mind fetching the pitcher of lemonade from the fridge? It’s fresh; I made it just before the two of you showed up.”
“Sure mama.” Elizabeth had long since cleaned her plate and stood to head towards the refrigerator. She was smiling. Lunch was turning out much better than she imagined. She was actually feeling a little giddy because she was genuinely enjoying this time with both her mother and Zeb. She had waited and waited for the proverbial shoe to drop that would cause Zeb to say he’s had enough and storm away. But it never came. It was almost surreal.
She was pulling down several glasses and carefully placing them on a tray with the pitcher of lemonade when she clued into what her mother was saying. Like a deer in headlights, she froze in mid step, holding a glass in one hand and the cold pitcher in the other.
Denise’s voice carried loud and clear. The horror of what she was saying was enough to cause Elizabeth's knees to buckle and she had to lean up against the counter just to hold herself up.
The other shoe had finally dropped.
“When Lizzie came home and told me she was pregnant right after her high school graduation I just knew her life was going to be over. She wasn’t married, and for the town to know that she laid down with some man like your everyday whore, well that was about all my poor heart could take. And you know what, she wouldn’t even name the Tomcat that she laid with.” Denise clucked her tongue. “It doesn’t matter now. She did the right thing by God and by that bastard baby. She gave the poor thing up for adoption. I know right here," she said patting her chest, “that the baby is with a good family that couldn’t have a child of their own. God works in mysterious ways you know. Maybe this was his path for Lizzie. It’s the only thing that makes sense. After that whole debacle, she went on and finished her schooling all by herself. She’s a nurse now, you know. A good, respectable nurse; and now that she has paid her penance for her sins, she would make a good, respectable wife, too.”
Denise looked at Zeb knowingly and nodded. “Think about it.”
Zeb was thinking alright but it wasn’t about a respectable wife. He wasn’t mentally counting back the months. Could it be possible? Did he have a bastard child out there, somewhere?