"You want to use a different spell today? Are you sure about that?" Thanos wasn't as excited as usual. "I'd honestly recommend just using Identify or Knots, hell, Lazy Day works too now that we're alone. You probably shouldn't try the others if you don't want to or until you have the time to get familiar with them."
It was Thursday morning, they were chatting over breakfast.
"I'll try to find the time to read through some of those journals this weekend, but I also need the motivation to do that. You were the one bragging about having so many awesome grimoires weren't you? Why are you getting cold feet now?
"Some of those research journals were for grimoires called Fireworks and Fly. There has to be some spell with a cool effect."
"We're not using those," Thanos was dead serious.
Atla hesitated, "Fine then, I'm just asking that you keep your eyes out for a good time to use a spell. Show me something useful or cool and please just remember to tell me some details so I don't make a fool of myself."
Why was she egging him on after their conversation with Hadi and Ida?
"... I can probably do that. But if there isn't a good opportunity can you just use Lazy Day when we get home again, okay. Or Pull, that's easy enough; it Pulls stuff you can reach to you with your strength, it's easy to learn but hard to master. Nifty hey?" He tried to lighten his tone with his usual advertising.
"Okay." She looked at him funny but finished breakfast anyway.
Today was another doozy, several lectures including marketing followed by work and a meetup with her friends in Another One. It was the premiere of some popular superhero movie or something so they were meeting there before walking to the cinema.
Atla pulled on her running shoes and started running.
•••
She'd made it to her last lecture before work, marketing. She'd made her debut as cactus girl here so uncomfortable stares were the most concentrated here. People made quiet comments to their friends like they were waiting for her to flip out and roast Mr. Brouwer again.
Atla had no allies in this lecture, the few people she recognised or sometimes greeted were quick to avoid her since the start of this monster of a week.
She sighed, sat in the closest seat to the exit she could find and deployed her special move: pretending to sleep on her arms. It was super effective.
Thanos hadn't been too bad, he'd cracked joke or two in her unbearably boring accounting lecture and even told her the answer to one of the lecturer's questions. Right now he was on the table looking utterly ordinary. "Here come some riff-raff" He said cautiously.
Atla looked up, Piet and two of his friends wandered into the lecture theatre, cheeks a little flushed and eyes struggling to adjust to the light, they plopped on the nearest seats next to Atla. They waved at her then laughed.
She started getting up when Mr. Bouwer entered, vaguely calling for silence.
Atla controlled her breathing, sat down and looked straight ahead.
Atla tried her best to listen to the dispirited and bland lecture, since Monday Mr Brouwer's lectures and moustache lost their spring. Piet was staring at the bright projector lens, listening to music, picking his nose and flicking the contents into the air. Between them his two more addled friends were sleeping on their arms. Maybe they needed attendance numbers or something.
Whatever the case Atla was glad that they were too hungover or sleepy to bother her much today.
Ten minutes before she was home free Mr. Bouwer wrapped up his presentation, "Okay like I warned you guys a few lectures back, you've got an assignment to find a gap in the market based on current events. Hopefully some of you will have kept an eye open for ideas because now you'll need to split into groups of four to complete the assignment."
Atla's shoulders slumped at the word 'groups'.
He held up a stack of papers and read one of them mechanically, "You're supposed to be reacting rapidly to take advantage of current events trends or fads while they're still relevant. Therefore it's due next week. Details in these printouts, pass them around, the absentees are in their own group." He began packing up and the lecture became much louder as students started divvying up, striking a balance between joining their friends and inviting geeks to push all the work onto.
Atla sighed, she half rose from her seat, looking around awkwardly. She received the stack of printouts and placed it on the head of one of Piet's napping friends. Soon the groups settled, some sat down in circles, others left early, and Atla spotted four like-minded stragglers scattered around the hall.
The five made eye contact and realised collectively that one of them would be left out. Atla sped up, towards the point where they were converging, not wanting to be the last one there. But it seemed that they had unanimously decided on their sacrifice since all four of them gravitated together but away from Atla, like she was literally repelling them.
Atla stood rooted in the aisle, fighting against taking it personally. It made sense, she nodded to herself, she was being regarded as some kind of mascot right now and was also Piet's latest target. She wouldn't want to be associated with herself either, that was why Atla wasn't angry... or hurt... not at all.
She clenched her jaw and walked to the front, maybe she could get into that group with whoever was absent today. Sensing her, Mr. Bouwer accelerated his escape, the closer Atla got the faster he moved, eventually grabbing loose papers under both arms and power walking for the exit. "Sir please wait," she called, making him jump.
"What is it, do you need a group?" He asked as gruffly as possible, not looking at her.
"Um yes, I was wondering"
"—Those three are short one aren't they?" He pointed at Piet's troop, they hollered from the back row.
Atla looked between them and Mr. Bouwer in disbelief, "Yes, but sir!"
"—Then go join them." He looked guilty for a moment then pulled the expression beneath his facial hair and left the building glancing around nervously.
Atla trudged to her group and pulled her chair away from the other three, extending their square of chairs into a kite. She was far away enough to leap to her feet should she need to run or let out some frustration defend herself.
Although Mr Brouwer was gone half the class was still here. The rain wasn't too heavy but the wind had become icy enough to keep those with the time inside. Ahead of her at flanks sat two strangers and opposite her, leaning over the backrest of his reversed seat sat Piet.
"Soooooo, what uh, whata' we supposed to be doing?" Piet posed the question to the group.
"Assignment wasn' i'?" The guy to Atla's right added helpfully. He was clearly on top of his game today. "That remin's me of a joke, why do fish never smile?"
He was mostly ignored, "Naw man, I remember this, we got to find something, like a, a way to make money." The beanie guy to her left winced and rubbed his temples.
"—'Cos they're always in schools." He chuckled to himself for a bit
Atla sighed, "We've got to identify an economic opportunity."
The guy to her right was now talking about fishing gear with the bored beanie guy to her left. Piet stopped rocking his chair, "Uhhhhhh-huh... Sorry what was that, Cactus GIrl?"
She grit her teeth, "It's Atla, basically we've got to look at the news and design a way to profit from a recent event."
"That's like what I said, Cactus Girl." chimed beanie guy.
"Mmmm profit... " They guy on the right tried to rock on his chair but fell over immediately. That made all three of them laugh for a good minute. Atla might have found it funny, but Piet would leap at the oppurtunity to 'defend his friend'. Goading name-calling was only an opening act after all.
"Anyway we can talk about this another time," Worst case she could find a topic herself and throw some busywork at them when they were sober or clean. Beanie guy was already on his phone anyway. If she left now she'd still be able to eat her packed lunch under the gutter before sprinting to work.
There were already people idly watching them when their own unexpectedly tedious group work came to a standstill. Atla was sure some were waiting for her to do something stupid or to cast some spell.
Piet wasn't done with her yet though, "I've got it, that, uh, gap in the market." He grinned and pointed at Atla, "Entertainment."
Beanie guy said, "Ohhhh," while the guy on the right fell of his chair again laughing.
"It's it's genius, Cactus Girl and her Magic. Kind of like a, what's the word I'm looking for, circus! A Magic Circus!"
"There could be tricks 'n stuff," the serial faller stated.
"Keh, does watering plants count as a trick?" Beanie guy said then chuckled
Piet grinned, "Hey, hey Cactus Girl, what tricks can you do?"
"Tricks?" Atla muttered, a lot of people were looking at her now but she wasn't looking back. Part of her was disgusted, but she didn't know how to respond. Now the fear was taking over.
"Yeah, tricks, what can you do withat weird fockin cactus?" There were people around her now, some might have looked at Piet distastefully, but others were curious about what spells she had.
Atla opened her mouth, several times, making only soft croaks. She was gulping like fish which caused a riot of laughter.
She couldn't get air out. But what would she have said, I don't understand? Please leave me alone. I can tie shoelaces?
"Breath Atalanta."
Thanos was loud and gentle and finally Atla remembered to inhale.
"You're doing great Cactus Girl, jus talk a lill more." Piet look at the turnout appreciatively.
"I can turn invisible," She murmured, almost like a prayer.
Some interest washed through the bystanders, but Thanos was the first to speak up, "You can't right now," he sounded very sorry.
"Ohhhreally? Prove it," he spoke loud and theatrically.
Atla gripped her wrist under her seat, still looking down, "I can't right now." She said quietly.
"You 'can't right now' huh? Pfff!" Piet voiced the crowd's disappointment with complimentary spittle.
Someone else said, "Oh come on," fed up.
"So you can splash some water, and you say that you can like totally go invisible. What else do ya say ya can you do, wow me Cactus Girl."
"Hey, Piet..." Said beanie guy, somber and a bit more sober.
"Huh?" Piet grunted aggressively.
"Nothin."
"Weirdo, c'mon Cactus Girl, give me something to work with. This won't get us good marks."
Atla unclamped her jaw, "I can pull stuff towards me."
"Now thas more like it," He held out his phone, "Pull this, show me a magic trick?"
"It needs to be closer," Her hair was covering her face.
"Huh, what was that?" Piet cupped an ear to his head and leaned forward. Only a few were laughing but no one was stopping him either.
"I have to be able to reach it."
"That's fucking retarded!" he exclaimed.
"Thanos, I need to get out of here," She whispered it, her eyes closed. Piet and his one friend were in hysterics. He was pulling his phone towards himself and saying "Look guys, I can use magic!"
"Atla, spells won't help here. You know that," he still hadn't moved from where she placed him on the desk
"I need to get out here," She cried again, a mixture of frustration and fear.
"...Very well." Thanos changed his tone, cheery and careless, "Actually now that I think of it I've got the perfect spell for you, Vent! You just got to blow through you nose and it'll be like a smoke bomb, don't worry I'll lead you out!"
"So you can splash water an' pull stuff you can reach, are ya sure your Magic aint broken, why's it a cactus anyway, that's stupid."
"I didn't ask for this." Her voice was cracking.
"Don't dawdle, Vent and blow, I want to use Magic." Thanos spoke impatiently.
Atla took a deep breath, "Vent." She scrunched up her nose and blew.
Choooooooooooooooo... A horn like a train sounded and from her nose and ears billowed steam. There were cries of surprise and then raucous laughter at the red faced Cactus girl who was going off like a kettle.
Atla kept puffing, her face was wet but nobody could see her anymore. There was shouting and confused people bumping into each other. Someone touched Atla and she jumped, the train horn died out but the thick fog of steam remained. "That was awesome, good lung power." Thanos was pushing her to her feet with the base of his pot.
He pressed himself into her hand that she couldn't see and led her out the crowd.
Atla burst out the doors and kept running. The paved path was dotted with puddles which she ran through and pedestrians which she knocked into said puddles. She fell along the way and scraped her palms, her socks got soggy too. Every time she slowed down she thought about what just happened, everyone laughing at her and her stupid spell, so she sped up again.
Finally she stopped, gasping for air and shivering under some gutter. Thanos forced some positivity through, "Excellent work, I tell you, Ruth definitely couldn't have created that much steam!"
Maybe as magic he was not able to see what would be humiliating about that situation. Not able to comprehend how his joke of a smokescreen spell had been the perfect end to Piet's tauntings, "You should really get a plaster for that, and shower too. Your clothes are rained through you wouldn't want to catch a cold now would y"
"—Stop it!"
She hunched down and leaned against the wall of some building, people walked by now and then but she was none of their business. She stayed like that for a while. She asked him for one spell, one harmless spell that could be cool or nifty and still he managed to make her look like Thomas the Tank Engine. Maybe Thanos was trying to ruin her life.
"Atla..." his sentence petered out due to her soggy glare.
"Just, just stop it... Can't you go?"
"Where to," He asked cautiously.
Atla chuckled but she wasn't laughing, "Anywhere, I don't care." Her face was pressed to her knees.
"I can't stand talking to you right now."
"Okay," His tone was still as light as he could manage. "I think I remember this area, I'll be waiting outside home for you. I was serious, don't catch a cold." He zoomed up against the rain for a bird's eye view of the streets.
Atla didn't watch him go. Maybe a minute after that she sniffed and wiped up her teary and snotty face, 'always carry tissues' her mom said. She wrung out her hair and checked the time, she couldn't go home, Thanos was there.
She knew where she had to go but dreaded it, her work shift hadn't ended yet. Breath Atla, she told herself and began walking, trying not to feel anything.
•••
"You're fired."
That's what her boss told her when she trudged mud into his office, two hours late for work and in a very sorry state. He'd glanced at her, calmly told her to sit, and dropped the bomb.
"...Huh?" was her best retort.
"What did you expect?" He squinted through his glasses at some data on his monitor. "You've been habitually tardy since we started employing you and your appearance and customer satisfaction scores have never been quite up to snuff. You were valuable because you worked earnestly when you were here and didn't mind working on weekends."
He gave her a chance to speak but Atla didn't trust herself to.
"But since... Sunday, your performance and productivity has dropped, customer feedback says that you were unsettling and constantly, uh, muttering to yourself.
"Then yesterday you arrived twenty minutes late and missed a priority package, not only that, another customer filed a written complaint about hygiene, apparently you 'smelled like sewage.'" he read that from a letter on his desk.
Atla just grimaced her mind on the Magic that her supervisor refused to mention.
Her superior, whose name she didn't actually know, looked at her expression, "And besides that you don't gel with your colleagues well, your team spirit is abysmal or so I'm told. To be honest I was going to recommend you start looking for another job today but this level of tardiness and scruffiness is just unacceptable."
He glanced at her shoulder where Thanos wasn't, "You may have started to make an effort to rectify these problems but it's too little and too late I'm afraid. You will receive your outstanding pay within three days, I hope that you take your next job seriously." Atla left without returning his silly fucking salute.
•••
Atla stood outside on the pavement, sheltered under Transportroops's overhang. Inside were heaters, bright lights and a counter where people could drop off or collect parcels to save on door to door costs.
Outside were bins for paper, plastic and cans and on the walls were a few gaudy posters, an employee with a parcel strapped to their back, navigating an unimpressive photoshopped jungle in military uniform, that sort of thing.
She was loitering around, trying not to think about anything but now she'd begun pacing across the entrance with glass doors. The woman at the counter shot her a cold glare, Atla stuck out her tongue childishly but stopped pacing, she wasn't done yet though. She strode to the bins behind the wall, sheltered from their sight.
"HA!" She kicked the bin in place of Thanos with all her might.
"Gah," breath escaped her, it hurt. If her grumpy judo master in Rotterdam saw that kick he would have called it unpracticed and pathetic.
The bin fell down and Atla hopped around holding her foot, she blinked away opportunistic tears, she would not start crying, she was too pissed. "Dammit, Thanos... Ruin everything" she muttered this to herself while doing her jig, "WHAT THE HELL!" she bellowed, scaring curious onlookers away.
Glancing through the glass doors the people inside Tansportroops had noticed her rampage too, she huffed some hair out of her face and righted the fallen bin, only needing to scoop up now damp papers.
The supervisor was walking out his office as she finished up, Atla glared at him a little but broke eye contact first, he wasn't who she was most angry with and she'd get into trouble if she stayed here much longer. She limped off, even with no magic she was cursing under her breath.
Around an hour later Atla was letting out frosty sighs on a swing in Frankendael park. She sorted out a lacklustre supper with two ham-less burger buns and an apple she bought at the supermarket. But it was evening now and really getting cold.
Of course those wouldn't be problems if she threw in the towel and went home. Or if she didn't let her friends down too and actually showed up at Another One. Hell, she could even just find a warm store to 'browse' in; but no. Here she was mulling about on a swing making life even more difficult for herself. And even as she thought this she knew it wouldn't motivate her into action.
Atla laughed derisively at herself for the umpteenth time then went back to stewing.
Her phone buzzed, from Natalie, "How are you?" Atla read the message and stared at the screen for maybe 30 seconds. Another message from her, "I heard about what happened, Piet's a total arse..." so it had already reached Natalie who was studying interior design. She could expect a lot of people to be making train jokes come tomorrow. "Chelsie told us about the contract, that was really unfair, that executor should go to prison for doing that to you. Anyway, we're here for you if you need it. ♥"
Atla still stared at the screen not sure what to say, she had to tap it to stop it from going into sleep mode. Eventually she got another message, from Chelsie this time, "We're at Another One if you want to get sloshed and weep on my shoulder pitifully. But only if you buy my drinks."
Atla snorted in amusement, Chelsie knew just how to piss her off into action.
•••
"Seriously, what shitty inheritance." Toasted Finn leading another round of shots. Atla had already withdrawn after the third, she just wasn't feeling up to it.
"Yeah, how can they just force magic on you like that, that would be like. Oh I don't know, like forcing someone to adopt a baby." Natalie's empty glass hit the table.
"Sometimes it really does feel like I'm a babysitter," Atla sipped her cider, glancing at the time, "You should listen to him, he has the attention span of a goldfish."
"Where's Thanos now?" Chelsie asked with interest.
"Probably home, I sent him packing after that lecture," She didn't talk about getting fired, hadn't gotten to it yet.
"Is that fine, leaving your Magic alone like that?" Lucas he'd mainly just listened to Atla's rants empathically
Atla shrugged, "How much more legal shit can I get into?"
"You'd be surprised," Chelsie didn't elaborate, she was probably just remembering her lectures, "Anyway if he agreed to go there shouldn't be a problem."
"I'm just amazed how useless grimoires are." Natalie jumped back in, putting her phone down, an old but happy dog grinned up at them from the lock screen. "I mean, when I heard you inherited magic, I didn't expect anything amazing, but they actually do more harm than good huh. And this magic, err Thanos, right? It didn't explain any of the spells did it?"
"Not properly anyway," Atla shook her head, then shifted a little in her seat.
"It's like it's actually trying to ruin your social life," She sympathised.
"You want to know what I think?" Finn growled, either actually fed up with magic or the topic. "I think, no, I know these bastards must be doing it on purpose. They're laughing at us, I know it. I mean just think about it you know, they never say where they came from and they only talk to each other and the bloke they're haunting. I bet they just do this stuff just for shits and giggles, like they're looking down on us, err, just normal people I guess..."
"Mortals?" Supplied Atla cautiously, unsure whether she should have fueled his paranoid fire.
"Mortals, I like it! That's it, like they're looking down on us mortals. And then there's all that fucking spooky shit that's happening in America..." He was distracted by the delivery of the next round of shots.
Chelsie was still drinking with them, chuckling and quipping, drink never affected her much. Usually Atla would be responding to the sarcastic comments but Natalie was doing an admirable job. "Want some more?" Chelsie gestured at a shot glass with a wicked kindly smile.
Atla shook her head, she was a light drinker in the first place and this gathering was somehow... draining her.
"Where uh where was I," Finn, who'd never spoken this much to her before aggregately quite enjoyed his tirade. "That magic, Thinos right? You should try to ditch it, take my advice, that shitty fake cactus will ruin your life." He meant well, probably.
"Sue him or something," he brainstormed. At the very least he was enjoying himself.
But Lucas cut in, "No I don't think that'll work..."
Natalie leaned on Finn's arm and gently reminded him that she'd signed a linking contract, he calmed down a bit. "Oh right, but there's gotta be a way out right?" He prompted Chelsie.
"Sure just pay 10000 euros, plus regular processing costs" She didn't even think about the question. "That or convince him to unlink with you, though I doubt Atla would manage to do that."
Atla nodded absentmindedly, Chelsie had never spoken to Thanos directly but it sounded like she knew how stubborn he was.
"I'll think of something," Atla said vaguely, during the lull in conversation she glanced at Natalie who was reading on her phone.
"We're in luck," she held her phone up, displaying some sort of timetable, "There's still one more showing tonight from 10 to 12, we can make it if we get a move on."
"Awesome!" Lucas was excited for it but Atla blanked out for a moment.
Oh right the movie... The lightbulb in her head clicked on, they were supposed to have met here for six, grabbed a bite and walked to the movies. Instead she'd arrived late and her friends had stayed to take part in her pity party and insult Thanos with her for almost two hours now.
Just when she thought her self loathing stat had maxed out it multiplied. She was the party pooper, the spectre at the feast, the grinch.
"You got your wallet on you?" Chelsie snapped her out of her brooding, everybody else was joking around outside and the barman was indeed waiting for Atla to pay her part.
"Ah," she nodded and started fishing about for euros. "You guys can go on ahead."
"You're not coming?" Chelsie raised an eyebrow. Atla could tell she was a little annoyed.
"No, I can't manage it. I know I'm being a pain." After all that waiting and TLC she was just leaving again, Atla would get annoyed too.
"Yeah."
"But please thank the others for the drinks and sympathy, it really helped a lot."
Chelsie looked at the 'helped' Atla skeptically, "Sure, don't I get a thank you for my compassion?" she grinned.
"... Thanks for being you."
"I'll take it. I'll tell them too, just make it up to us sometime, see ya Atla."
Atla waved her off and left Another One once the barman finished counting her mountain of small change. She wasn't sure what she was expecting by coming here, sympathy, trash talk about Piet, rude statements at Thanos. She got those.
But the catharsis didn't come.
At any ratedisappointing her friends was just another disappointment to add to today. Thesky was dark and cloudy but the rain had stopped, Atla needed a walk.