How had he managed to make something as simple as talking so attractive? Seriously, the dinner that I'd been invited to go on by Jimmy after the 'I Can't Even' show was just an excuse for me to watch Chris from across the table in the most inconspicuous way possible. Maybe the most inconspicuous way to watch him would have actually been to rewatch his YouTube videos without telling him, but nothing could compare to seeing him now.
Less than an hour ago, when we were still seated at dinner in a pizza restaurant, he'd managed to show everyone else up on the conversation front. He could easily harness the attention of a crowd and control everyone in any way that he saw fit with his words. He'd just looked so...happy, comfortable even. He had smiled in such a way that it became an infectious thing that everyone else seated at the table had mirrored effortlessly.
The lazy glow through the paper lanterns on the light bulbs had lit him up like a spotlight on a darkened stage; this soft light making him look ghostly pale whilst enhancing the shadows at his jawline. The music in the air had been a mere backing track to his graceful storytelling technique, his voice mellifluous on the ear. And that smile... I'd go close to saying that it was a thing of beauty.
I had to wonder if I'd ever made him smile in such a way. I would love to be on the receiving end of one of those smiles and have my insides voluntarily transformed into mush by it.
My phone buzzed from where I'd discarded it at the end of my bed upon returning home from eating a whole pizza by myself. This dancing motion caused my mattress to vibrate a little, physically pressing me to sit upright from lying flat out on my bed, and staring at the ceiling in the midst of daydreaming about my flatmate who was just a room away from me. Was this what the typical teenage girl in the majority of teen fiction felt like concerning her hopeless love towards the school jock? If so, I'd just gleaned this whole new area of understanding and sympathy for those characters. Why would those authors put their characters through that, for fuck's sake?
I slowly hefted myself upright to crawl sluggishly towards my phone before simply dropping down at the other end of my bed next to my phone, where I checked my messages from my very comfortable reading position.
"Any chance you want to Skype tonight? Marvel misses your face!" the message from Maddie read.
Since our last Skype session almost two weeks ago, the two of us had had brief conversations on iMessage and sent a long stream of ridiculous Snapchats to each other as well. I really should try and Skype her more often, maybe once a week if the two of us could manage to scrounge the time to do that. Despite how badly I needed to update my blog and how preoccupied I was in thinking of how stunning Chris would look if I managed to make him smile somehow, Maddie came first. And besides, there was one question that I'd been putting off from asking her over iMessage in the hopes that I could see her physical reaction to my question over Skype.
No sooner had I decided to Skype my best friend did I find my laptop turned on and the Skype network opened up before me. After checking that she was online, I video called her. She accepted the call within seconds. Seeing as she'd responded so quickly, I had to wonder if she'd been waiting for my call. I had to hope that she wasn't asking to Skype because something bad had happened.
Upon seeing the relaxed and content face of my friend again on that pixelated screen, I knew that I would be able to voice a question that had been shadowing my mind ever since she'd first mentioned it during our last Skype session:
"How are things going with dog walker David?" I blurted to her, not even giving her chance to think before I pounced on her with my direct question. I'd been waiting to ask her this question for two weeks now and by asking it now, I could maybe gauge if she was being truthful or not by viewing her physical reaction to it. Finally, I'd been given the chance to ask her and that very question had prised its way out of me like a caged beast that had been growing and growing in preparation of its release.
Maddie raised her eyebrows at me, her forehead creasing obviously. "It's nice to see you too, Jay. How are you? Please don't bother asking me such trivial questions, I beg of you. Cut to the juicy stuff, why don't you?"
I giggled and regarded my friend fondly. "Okay, I'm sorry. I'll try to be a tad more mundane just for you." I relaxed my facial muscles and started to speak in a bored and heavy tone of voice. "How are you, Madeline? How's work? Are you having regular bowel movements?"
She closed her eyes and sighed theatrically with a small smile on her pink lips. "I swear to God, Jay, you'll be the end of me." She shook her head, her midnight hair swaying like blackout curtains across her shoulders. To me, it looked like she'd re-dyed her hair again recently so that her mousy brown roots weren't showing any more. Her hair looked inky and glossy now, and it was so dark it almost seemed to swallow the minimal light in Maddie's room. The only light on Maddie's face did appear to only be the light from her screen and me.
"If you must know, Marvel likes him," Maddie revealed, her eyes still closed. "He asked if Marvel and I would like to go on more walks with him and his terrier Parker."
By now, I knew that Maddie sometimes referred to her own thoughts by using her dog's name instead of her own, especially if what she had to say could be perceived as being an unpopular or controversial opinion. Probably the most memorable thing that Maddie has said is that 'Marvel really likes the Twilight Saga'. Apparently she likes the werewolves most and is Team Jacob... I really don't know what to do with my best friend. Or what I'd do without her and her comforting Skype calls, messages, and unintentionally funny antics.
A grin grew on my face as I watched her. She was so very in denial about her opinion towards this David, that much I could tell. I kind of wanted to ask for his full name so that I could find his Facebook profile and assess his suitability for my best friend. Should I do that? If she were like this about someone we were both mutually friends with then I'd definitely do some Becca level stalking without question. I may have to check Maddie's Facebook later to try and find David...just an idea.
"I take it that I'm allowed to quiz you about your exciting London adventure now," Maddie said. She was running her hands through her hair again, a sure sign that she was eager to leave this conversation topic behind. I wasn't going to let her give up that easily.
"I hope you have something sugary in your proximity to give you an energy boost because I'm definitely not going to let you change the topic that easily," I said sombrely. I smirked at her. "May the big reveal begin."
Maddie rolled her eyes. "You mean the interrogation."
"That's another name for it, yes."
She tutted at me and reached out of the view of her webcam to retrieve an orange cellophane packet of what appeared to be biscuits. "I've got Jaffas to sustain me if you really are adamant," she chuckled as the packet rustled loudly at her touch.
I stuck out my bottom lip and widened my eyes at her. "I want Jaffas..." Chris did still owe me some Jaffa Cakes as part of our bargain for me to be Becca for a day. I was still waiting for him to remember but I wouldn't hesitate to nag and prod him about it, mind.
"Tough," Maddie said triumphantly whilst ripping open the wrapper to those heavenly disks.
"Meanie... So what does David look like? Can I have a photo?"
"You're such a stalker," she said before shoving a whole Jaffa Cake into her mouth and chewing slowly whilst making 'mmmm' sounds.
"I hate you so much, you gloating cow," I groaned at her. It felt like if I didn't get any Jaffa Cakes soon then I'd end up punching my laptop screen in the hopes of snatching Maddie's food. Either that or I'd find a way to drive back to her house and eat all of them myself in person. I may have been stuffed from my pizza just moments ago but this was the sort of effect my favourite snack had on me; it banished my hunger like a guard dog would do to a robber.
"Do you want an answer or not?" Maddie toyed with me by waving a Jaffa Cake around casually.
I suppressed a frustrated groan and told Maddie that she was the almighty goddess of my world and could she please enlighten me on who her current suitor was, please. She must really enjoy making me speak up more. She enjoys playing pranks on people so I guess that is mirrored in how she likes to tease people and toy with their emotions in a playful manner. She'd never want to harm people purposely, I think. I hope.
She sighed in submission. "He's tall, fair, and gorgeous," Maddie revealed, her hair becoming knotted and crazy now. She was also feverishly nibbling on a Jaffa Cake between words. "He likes to wear hoodies under coats, plucks his eyebrows because he thinks they'll look like unkempt hedges otherwise, and he adores 'The Avengers'."
"What else?"
"Else? You want me to go on?"
I gave her a sarcastic look which featured lazy eyelids and a deadpan facial expression. "I wouldn't ask otherwise, would I? I always want to hear what you have to say, Mads."
She smiled slightly and cleared her throat awkwardly. "His dog is named after Peter Parker, he's met Stan Lee, he's really accepting and open minded, and, um, I think he looks a bit like Jeremy Renner. You know, he played Hawkeye in 'The Avengers'?"
I gave her a small smile. "I know of him. David does sound good for you, in premise."
"In premise?"
"Well, you're going to say 'no' to me when I ask how soon I can Skype him to test his suitability for you, so I won't bother pressing it. I don't know him too well, so I can't make a valid judgement, so it's 'in premise'. You get it?"
"You care way too much."
I frowned at her. "I do not! I'm just looking out for you!"
Maddie scoffed and slotted another Jaffa Cake into her mouth, her lips smirking at me around the bulge of her cheeks.
"You cow. So what sort of things have you and David talked about?" I said tentatively. I didn't really want my usually forward and chatty friend to shut me out and not tell me the so called 'mundane' parts of her life just because I'd moved away. To me, anything she said could hardly class as being mundane.
"We made a plan to go and see 'Guardians of the Galaxy' together, if that counts as conversation," she said. Her eyes were shining with a glimmer of suppressed excitement now, I noted. "There's this new high-tech food bar that we might go to as well. Or we'll eat in with Marvel and Parker. I'm not gonna lie about how cute he was when he asked me. Kind of shy and blushy. It reminded me of Marvel in the seconds after she's woken up: all reserved and quiet."
Sometimes I really think that Maddie loves her dog too much, if it's possible. "Wow, if you think that of him, it proves that you're not an emotionless robot after all, doesn't it?" I teased her. "But it does sound like your perfect day, right?"
Maddie's eyes were rolling about in her sockets so much that I wouldn't be surprised if they fell from her skull and rolled away like marbles. "Yeah, it is kind of perfect," she admitted eventually.
"Is it a date?"
"I don't know... I can tell Marvel's routing for me. She'd definitely like to see Parker some more at the very least."
I had a sneaking suspicion that Maddie was now trying to effectively force down steel shutters on this conversation. She was more for learning and listening about other people or about what other people were going through rather than having a lengthy conversation about herself. I guess that's why she made such an effective journalist. She really did make me work to be a good friend to her, which made getting to know her in the first place a real challenge.
And yet, I was undeterred. I wanted to force my way under the gradually shrinking gap beneath those shutters and talk to her about what was going on in her life right now. I wanted to do the same for her as she does for me. I can't even begin to describe how much I value her and our friendship. She's probably my favourite person.
Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately depending on which way you're looking at it) there was a brisk knock on my bedroom door before I could target Maddie with my next leading question.
"What do you want?" I called to my door, angling my mouth away from my laptop microphone so that I wouldn't completely deafen Maddie.
Chris spoke up from the other side of the door, speaking at a similar volume to me. "If you don't want these Jaffa Cakes I could just eat them all by my lonesome self instead..."
"No!" I yelped. I reached out towards my closed door, my arms straining in their sockets. "You promised!"
"Come and get them if you want them that badly!"
I looked away from my door to raise an eyebrow at Maddie, who was smiling coyly to herself as she gingerly ate her own Jaffa Cakes. "I would, but I'm mid-Skype right now." I wrinkled my nose at Maddie and mouthed 'this is your fault' to her. She shook her head vigorously and grinned contently. Damn her.
"I'm not your slave!" Chris yelled in outrage.
"Eugh, please?" I whined. I was going to regret making him do this. He'd claim that I was in his debt now or something.
My flatmate eased my door open to bring his head and one of his arms into view where he had a dual pack box of Jaffa Cakes in hand. Did he have some form of sixth sense so that he knew when he was needed? I mean, I don't need him, I don't. I need the Jaffa Cakes. Not him. No.
I reached out towards him with both hands and made a grabbing motion with my fingers like a demanding toddler. "Jaffas, please." I may have been acting up a bit and showing off a lot because Maddie was watching and listening in intently, but I couldn't really help myself. It was a characteristic that I'd often seen in my younger brothers when they'd had friends round back when I was still living with them. Those friends and my brothers would speak extra loudly, be more boisterous, and simply be more idiotic when I was there too. Maybe it was a family genetic of mine to act like a complete pillock whenever two friends of mine met, or maybe it was a childish trait I'd been yet to grow out of.
Chris pushed my door open with a deep sigh and slowly walked over to my bed the blue box of glorious food. 'Who is it?' he mouthed to me as I prised open the box and started to rip one of the packets open.
"It's Maddie," I said plainly, not really invested in the conversation now that I was in possession of my favourite food. My first Jaffa Cake was soft and gooey in texture, whilst the chocolate coat crumbled between my teeth in a satisfying crackling sound. The orange jelly was beautifully bitter on my tongue whilst the smooth consistency cooled my dry tongue. It felt like cameras should be filming my mouth to slow the footage down and produce some form of ultimate eye candy action.
"Hi," Chris said limply, waving round the side of my laptop so that only his hand was visible to Maddie. It was as if he didn't want Maddie to see him. Perhaps he was always cautious about who saw him because of YouTube? If Maddie recognised him, she'd know where he lived because of me, and then potentially his fans could find him. Hm.
"Is that Chris?" Maddie said sweetly. Chris mumbled something which sounded like 'yeah'. "Jay's told me so much about you! She absolutely adores living with you! She's talked endlessly about how yo-"
I hastily slammed my fingers over the mute button on my laptop keys, silencing Maddie and leaving her to talk to herself for a moment. I could feel blood rushing through my body as a heated blush formed on my skin. Why had Maddie said that? I could guess that she'd been about to tell him about my RandomStickz plan, or something of that ilk, and that was a terrifying prospect. How could she? I didn't want to tell Chris and Mia what was going on. I wanted it to be a surprise for when they got together.
Chris was smirking from just off the view of my webcam. "You 'adore' living with me, huh? What else has Maddie got to say, 'Jay'?" He lifted his hand up and moved it towards the mute button on my laptop, ready to turn the sound back on.
My eyes widened as I dropped the Jaffa Cake box and grabbed his arm, stopping him in his tracks. I swallowed slowly and gradually lifted my gaze to look him dead in the eye. Trying to avoid the quivering sensation that I could feel up and down my spine at holding Chris' bare arm in my hand was an almost unavoidable thing to do. "I told her about how excited I was to work on 'I Can't Even'," I gushed, not moving my hand as I watched his amused face intently. "I know that the filming was meant to be a secret from your viewers, but I was overwhelmed by it all and had to tell someone. I'm sorry. Maddie won't tell anyone."
Chris' arm muscles relaxed under my fingers. "Really?"
I knew that by saying this about 'I Can't Even', then Chris would definitely think that he'd done me a favour by inviting me along, and he'd never let me forget that. He'd tease me and mock me for being such a fangirl, even. But, I'd rather have him thinking that than knowing about my plan for him and Mia; about all of the work I'd done in the easy task of developing Mia's negative emotions and mind-set.
"Yes," I said. I unwound my fingers from his arm and picked my half eaten Jaffa Cake up from my bed, taking a small bite from it despite how ill I was now feeling at the thought of being discovered by either Chris or Mia at this early stage.
"I wouldn't have pinned you as a fangirl, Princess," Chris chuckled. "It's probably why you took to playing Becca so well."
I wouldn't look at him, instead focussing on a point just off Maddie's image on the screen. My best friend was looking to the right of the screen to where I presume she could hear Chris' voice. I'd forgotten to turn off the microphone.
Chris leant down and snatched a Jaffa Cake from the pack which was resting on my knee, which startled me into moving. Once again, I grabbed at his arm but this time, my hand caught on the wrist of the hand which had the Jaffa Cake in.
I looked along his arm to his face again. "My Jaffas," I warned him. Just looking at him was becoming difficult now. Okay, even being in the same room as him was becoming difficult without me wanting to jump into his arms and grip him in a hug. We hadn't even hugged before, so why was I feeling like this around him?
I slowly leant forward and took the Jaffa Cake from between his fingers by biting into the cake. The motion ended up being much more seductive and flirty than I'd wanted it to. I'd only wanted my Jaffa Cake back!
Chris didn't move his hand for a moment, instead leaving his relaxed hand in my grasp. Did he like me too? Why hadn't he pulled his hand away and made gagging sounds? Friends didn't eat out of each other's hands like this, right?
All too soon, Chris appeared to register that he hadn't moved so he tugged his hand away from me whilst making an 'eugh' sound. "You're so weird. Like I said, you and Becca are very similar," he said with a taunting grin. I stuck my tongue out at him as he walked out of my room empty handed. At least he hadn't noticed how panicked I now felt.
"Hey!" I called, making him stop in his footsteps to look back at me. I retrieved a Jaffa Cake from the pack and threw it towards him. He caught the treat in his clawed hands with ease before fitting the whole cake into his mouth and walking from the room with a mumbled 'Bye, Maddie!'. I couldn't help but smile after him through my closed door.
I turned my laptop sound back on and picked up another Jaffa Cake to nibble at.
"That was Chris?" Maddie said slowly and deliberately.
I nodded and took another bite.
"He looks nice, handsome. I haven't seen you act like that with anyone before, mind."
I looked up from my lap to watch Maddie. "What?"
My best friend smiled innocently. "In the time I've known you, you've gone out with two guys, which is half of all the guys you've ever gone out with, right?"
I shrugged. I didn't like talking about my past relationships and the failures of all four. Those guys weren't worth thinking about in such detail.
"You never flirted like that with the other guys. You were a combination of being both shy and bossy, which kept the other guy interested and intrigued by you. But with Chris, you were full out flirting, or at least, what I think classes as flirting for you. You were bossy, rude, playful, and tender all at once. You were never like that with any other guy."
"What the fuck are you on about?" I squeaked, my Jaffa Cakes discarded now as my heart pounded and my head spun in dizzy circles. It was just a little crush, I knew that. Maddie had to know that too, right?
Maddie took a deep breath. "The only guy you've been anything close to being like that is when you talk about Augustus, and that's saying something. I think... I think you like Chris, like a lot."
I swallowed. "B-b-but I'm focussing on RandomStickz, you know that. I could never come between them. They're so in love it's chaotic! They're made for each other! You haven't seen the way he looks at her and how she looks at him! It's like being knocked over by waves of their yearning to be with the other!"
"Stop acting so shrilly," Maddie scolded me, her eyebrows knitted together now. "You say that you've been trying to split Mia and Dan up, but you've only been pointing stuff out to Mia verbally, you haven't taken much physical action. Face it, Jay: you can't bring yourself to do it anymore. You're emotionally invested. You love him."
Anger boiled and raged inside me, replacing the embarrassment and stutters with blinding fury. I didn't love Chris. The very idea of such a thing was disgusting. It made me want to vomit. 'Love'? Never. I didn't. No.
"You're wrong," I spat, savagely attacking a Jaffa Cake and making my eyes dart away from Maddie in repulsion to her words. "I could never like Chris in that way. I just haven't had the chance to do much RandomStickz work, that's the only reason why it hasn't happened yet. I've been busy." I looked back at Maddie to see how she'd react to my words and defensive attitude.
Maddie raised her eyebrows at me. "You know I don't mean to make you angry, Jay. I'm just letting you know what I think. It's what I do for a living."
I looked at her and watched how tense her face muscles were, how I could observe this even on the shifting pixels of a Skype call because it was such an obvious emotion. She was worried for me. Was she worried that she had a potential boyfriend and that I hadn't had any form of romantic interest apart from Augustus for well over three years now? Or was she worried because she knew how bad I was with handling my feelings and how pathetic I was at controlling my emotions? I didn't know what to say to her.
"I know you'll want to try and prove me wrong by making RandomStickz happen somehow, but just so you know," Maddie said in a determined tone as she stared me down in a terrifying manner, "I ship Chamie."
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A/N: Hello peoples *waves*
Nay or yay for the Chamie moments in this update? I just started writing them and then couldn't stop! I'm glad I can write a little more freely now that 'I Can't Even' is over ^-^
I was kind of tagged by @SamisTotallyCoolish to do this questionnaire-y thingamajig a month or so back, and the only place I can really think of doing it is here in an A/N >.< I know quite a lot of you won't care, but I think I should answer them, even if I'm very late (sorry Sam! Thanks for tagging me <3)
1) What's your totes fave 5SOS song at the moment?
*Hides* I don't listen to 5SOS much, sorry. I do read @EllaTheEllaphant's 5SOS fic, though ;) Casual plug right there...
2) Do you ever wear makeup?
The real question should be 'how the hell do people wake up early enough in the morning to put makeup on?!' because no, I don't often wear makeup. I am partial to thick lashings of eyeliner and red lipstick though :3
3) Have you ever kissed anyone? If so was it like a peck or hardcore making out?
Nope, no 'tongues battling for dominance' here.
4) Who are some of your role models/people you look up to/you are inspired by?
Every YouTuber I'm subscribed to (if I listed them then I'd accidentally write an essay on why they inspire me for each person. I could fill a whole novel with those), Rainbow Rowell, JK Rowling, Non Pratt, Hayao Miyazaki, and of course the beautiful @Beckyisaleopard who if I didn't know, then I'd be a lot less happy <3 I almost deleted my stories on quite a few occasions, so without her, you wouldn't be reading this story now. My friends are also a big inspiration for me.
5) If you could be in any band ever, which band would you choose?
Chameleon Circuit. Or maybe FOB...but then Muse...
6) Are you athletic? If so, what sport do you play?
*cue hysterical laughter* Um, no.
7) Do you have any siblings?
One brother. He'd hate me if I said much else about him, actually.
8) How old are you?
Ah, that's a mysterious question that most people don't know on here, actually... apart from some people I PM... I'm older than @Beckyisaleopard but younger than Troye Sivan. There you go :P
9) How tall are you?
I'm 5'7''. I'm actually average height compared to most of the girls my age that I know, maybe I'm an inch or so taller.
10) If you could kiss anyone right now, who would it be?
That's confidential (but then #Bemma)
I'll write the names of the people I want to tag in the comments when I think of some. Sorry if you've already been tagged by someone else! (of course you don't have to do the tag either way :))
Please comment and vote on my story if you liked the update/the story generally :)
*salutes*
Em >^-^<
PS. No, I don't have any clue what's going on with the Wattys this year :/ I think I entered POC... I migth enter TNP if that works.