Chapter 21
LaMaya
I knew it was an accident…
I was there…
I saw with my own eyes…
He didn’t mean to…
But he did…
*
I stood outside the door of my son’s room in the hospital. They were supposedly working on him but I knew what the outcome of this situation would be.
I would be the one hurt once again.
Sooner than I thought a doctor came out the room.
“…He didn’t make it…shaken baby syndrome…”
Those were the only words I heard and I just stared into outer space. Dre was sitting next to me and I just knew he was hurting worse than I was because he did it, I just don’t understand.
Dre was playing with Nathaniel and he was shaking him but I didn’t think that he was hurting him because he was laughing at first…
I don’t want to think about that shit.
My son is dead!
I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked up to see Zoey and Ezra. I looked away and just stared.
“It’s going to be alright.” Zoey said wrapping her arms around me.
We both knew that was a lie. She looked as if she had been crying for days and I still haven’t dropped a tear for some reason.
It’s not that I don’t want to, I guess it just haven’t got through my mind yet. I love him though.
I don’t believe he’s gone just like that!
He can’t be!
D’Andre
I didn’t mean to hurt him!
I wasn’t trying to at all, I was just playing with my son!
I killed him!
This shit is my fault!
How can somebody live knowing that they killed their own child?
I swear I wasn’t trying, Lala stood there watching me play with him.
I didn’t know that if you shake babies they could die, no one ever told me that.
I feel like shit!
I was shaking him and playing with him because he was laughing at first then he just stopped. I wasn’t trying to at all because I loved him.
I wasn’t trying to hurt my own kid, I wouldn’t hit that low!
It was an accident!
Ezra
I can’t even imagine what they going through right now!
‘Dre my nigga and even though we ain’t been talking lately because of the shit that he did, I was trying to look past all that because he looked like he was about to die…like he lost his best friend or something. I ain’t never seen him like that and I felt sorry for him so I went sat down beside him.
“Don’t beat yourself up Dre, it was just an accident.” I said.
He put his hands together like he was praying and he dropped tears and I felt so damn bad.
“…I wasn’t trying to…” he said shaking his head.
“It’s gonna be alright bro, you didn’t do it intentionally.”
He didn’t even say anything else, tears just kept falling and I pulled him into a bro hug. I glanced over at Zoey trying to talk to LaMaya but Lala was just staring out into nowhere, she wasn’t crying at all but you could see the hurt on her face.
“Go home and get some rest LaMaya.” Bella told her.
Lala stood up and grabbed her car keys.
“What’s going on?” I asked standing up.
“They both should go home and rest until the morning and we can sort it all out.” Bella said.
“Can you drive home with all this on your mind?” I asked Lala.
“I’m fine. Dre come on.” She said.
He got up and we left behind them. I hate being in the hospital because it makes me feel really uncomfortable and I’m glad we leaving.
I know in my heart they were devastated but the fact that they were leaving together was something different. I hope she don’t do anything she’ll regret.
Bella told everyone else but told them not to come to the hospital because she was sending Lala home to get some rest.
I can’t believe they lost their baby.
When Zoe and I got home I just held onto my little girl because one day they here and the next their gone. I don’t know how to deal with deaths so I didn’t really know how to approach the situation but I tried the best way I could.
LaMaya
I got home and got in the bed and Dre was there holding me, I didn’t even care at the moment, I just wanted my baby back.
It hasn’t quite set in yet but I know how I’ll be once it do and I know it’ll be much worse. He was my pride and joy and now he’s gone just like that.
I had my arms around Dre with my head in his chest as he held me tightly.
I don’t know if this is right or wrong but it feels right and I just need to be held right now.
I just hope and pray that God is with us…