Oh SHIITTTT---
I'm squealing like a stuck pig as I turn at the last second to see PugFace Flora Harkin jumping up from behind a rose bush, giant meaty hands coming at my face. I try to bolt forward but feel her grab the shoulder of my jacket, and I wobble backward.
"Bitch--" Comes Flora's voice just beside my head and full on fucking panic mode sets in.
"No!!" I scream aloud, and twist toward her and see her flushed, furious, puggy face and seething eyes up close and fucking personal. My hands reach for her forearm to try and pry her off.
"Let GO!" My quick twist and the slippery wind-breaker fabric of my jacket saves me - I slip right out of her hand and then make a mad ass dash away.
Oh SHIT SHIT SHIT NO NO NO NO NO --- Why is this fucking happening!! How did she find me? FUCKKKKKK--- My mind is racing faster than my legs but it doesn't do me much good because I have no fucking idea what to do. I can hear Flora and Tamara just behind me, breathing hard and angrily.
FUCK FUCK FUCKKK--- I bolt towards the playground area, jumping through the swingset chains and nearly slipping on the pea rocks. I hear an angry grunt and a crash-like sound and peak over my shoulder to see that Tamara fell in the pea rocks herself, though PugFace is still coming, looking like a madass bull ready to gore me and smash me to smithereens. I am NOT READY TO DIEE----
"Flora wait!!" I gasp breathlessly as I run for dear life around the rickety jungle gym.
"I'M NOT WAITING YOU LITTLE BITCH--"
"Please!! Can we just---talk?" I have no idea why I'm saying these things but I'm quite literally desperate because I AM AT A PARK BY MYSELF WITH TWO SHE-BEASTS TRYING TO KILL MY SCRAWNEY ASS. I DON'T FORESEE AN EASY SURVIVAL FROM THIS!! I skid around the shitty little rock-climb wall on the jungle gym with Flora on my heels, sounding winded but ferocious.
"NOO. I'M GONNA KILL YOU!!! YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD! " Yeaaa, she doesn't sound too reasonable right now, what with her whole, 'I'm a raging Murder Gorilla Gal' kind of attitude.
Buuutt I'm FUCKING DESPERATE REMEMBER? So here I go, reasoning away... "Just...listen!!" I try to say through gasps as I head for the teeter totters, feeling my legs cramp up and my chest tighten. "Please Flora!!"
I hear her stop and I turn mid-sprint, gasping for breath to look over the poorly painted red teeter totters. She stands opposite, hulking and gasping and glaring so darkly its like seeing Satan himself (herself?). I stand in the pea rock, chest heaving and hurting, gasping for breath like the out-of-shape little fuckwad that I am, body tensed to run at any second.
"Please...Flora..." I say between gasps. Oh please, even just so I can catch my damn breath...
Her face start to redden some more and her wrinkly little eyes damn near disappear under her furious brow. "Do not ask me to listen to you, you bitch. You've ruined EVERYTHING. My own FAMILY HATES ME NOW. " Her words come out at the end as a harsh shriek that disturbs a few birds in the nearby maple trees and accentuates her rage.
We stand there for a few seconds more, opposite each other with two hideous teeter totters between us, and I feel a little click in my brain - a button has been hit.
"Well you made that bed, you gotta lay in it dumbass."
Okay, so it wasn't a good button.
But CAN YOU BELIEVE SHE'S BLAMING ME WHEN SHE'S THE CRAZY ONE?! Like, I know I"m not a good person, but I don't go around attempting to KILL PEOPLE (though I think of it), nor do I mentally bully my friends (Poor Em). My 'desperation' left the building because downright annoyance replaced it. Because, god dammit this dumb bitch just BLAMES everyone else for her own problems!!
Soooo the second those snarky words left my mouth I turned and fucking booked it like a bat out of hell. My little half-second of sass gets washed over by straight fear again because Flora immediately screams: "YOU'RE BABY BITCH BLOOD IS FUCKING DEAD!!"
Ahhhhhhh!!! Shiiit shit shit shit--- I'm sprinting for my van now, digging furiously in my jacket pocket for the keys and finding them, gripping them in my hand and now I hit the button, the unlock button, I'm like still half the park away but I'm faster than Flora, somehow, but I'm gonna make it. Look, the lights flashed and OHMYFUCK NOOOOOOOO!!
Because, there, standing at the ready beside my van, is Tamara.
"Fuck!!" I scream aloud and veer off too the right, nearly tripping because I turn so hard. She must have went back to my van after she fell by the swingset! Damn her!! Flora laughs evilly and breathlessly behind me and says:
"Hahaha got you now you little BITCH."
Okay okay okay so you're fine you're find you're fine just keep going you can outrun her and maybe someone will be here ---
But as I scan around, still running like mad and feeling the worst stitch in my side, I realize that this park is old and thickly covered with tall, strong maples and lilac bushes and spruce trees - it's not big but you barely see the parking lot passed all the maple trees and the street is guarded by an army of thick spruces. No one can see in.
Soooo I will have a very private death. Fuck.
The rose bushes are coming up, that perfect half circle and I have to make a decision on whether I dash left or right - the left has more garden like little plots, the right has the lilacs and the gazebo and whatnot. I peek over my shoulder and see Flora behind me, but she's slowing down, and looks to be limping (that ankle she rolled before must be bothering her again AHA WEAK ANKLED SASQUATCH).
Make a decision make a DECISION! I scream at myself, because getting trapped in the rosebush circle means certain, baby bitch blood spilling, violent death. I make to run directly for it and at the last second hook to the right - I hear Flora's angry curse and a rustled crash, she must have tripped into the bushes. Ha!! Bitch!! EAT THEM THORNS OGRE WOMAN!!
Ok ok ok thats all great but NOW WHAT.
All that's over here are lilac bushes and a gazebo and more gardens but an idea forms as I see that there's a gap under the gazebo... Could I fit? Flora and Tamara are big girls (like six foot something and solid builds) so maybe I could crawl in there and hide, or at least be out of reach?? And then have time to CALL FUCKING 911?!
I make the decision and then nearly jump out of my skin at an angry scream behind me- imagine a gorilla/dragon/girl-who-just-rolled-her-ankle-for-the-third-time and that's the scream folks. It means Flora is up and more pissed than ever.
Okay okay okay HERE FUCKING GOESS--
I round the Gazebo like the fastest three legged pony at the Nerd Farm. The gap near the front is by no means big enough for me to fit into - FUCK FUCK SHIT DAMN HELLL FUCK - but hopefully there's another if I keep going around. The lilac bush on the side is big and browning, and also apparently hasn't been trimmed recently. Because as I sprint by, eyes on the lower level of the gazebo looking for a gap big enough to fit me, I catch my left shoulder on a sharp branch.
"OWW!! SHIT!" I yelp in bewilderment. My own speed and the sturdiness of the branch stabbing my left armpit knocks me back hard. I land flat on my back on the grass and leaves with a gasp and a curse, but fly wildly back up as I fight the tears in my eyes. OW OW OW FUCK DAMN SHIT-- But, being on the ground gives me a new vantage point that allows me to see through the base of the bush, and see the nice wide gap beneath the graying gazebo boards - a hole big enough for me to crawl into!!
I jump forward and scramble on my belly behind the thick lower branches of the bush and slide sideways on piles of dirty leaves - it's barely big enough for me to squeeze through but enough so that I can hide. I cover my mouth with my hand and try super hard not to breath too loudly.
Ok ok YES WE FUCKING DID IT WE SURVIVED WE'RE HIDING...OH SHIT THERE SHE IS OH GODD!! And quite literally, there she is. Flora gimps quickly around the lilac bush, gasping and cursing, big tennis shoes crushing leaves and sticks as she goes. Oh fuck does it look obvious that I just crashed through those branches? Will she see? Can she reach me? FUCKKK--
But she speeds right by, so intent that she probably doesn't look down. My heart is racing.
Well, this isn't how I really planned on spending my day. Hiding under a gazebo with leaves and probably animal poop (and hopefully not any actual animals) with a stupid little stab wound in my damn fucking armpit.
Yep, in my armpit - I can fucking feel it. Though more like the front of my arm pit if I'm honest. It stings like a motherfucker but my adrenaline is so high I don't think I'm feeling all of the pain yet. It doesn't feel huge or anything, just awkward and a bit painful. The sound of another set of loud crunchy footsteps greets my ears and I freeze, attempting to hold my breath.
I think Tamara runs by now, because her limp is more prominent. I'd feel bad if you bitches weren't trying to FUCKING KILL ME. Then she's gone just as quickly. Suddenly there are loud clump clump clump noises that almost make me scream. She's climbing the steps of the gazebo! I flinch with each loud clump clump clump too my left and instinctively press myself harder and harder into the leaves as her footsteps grow closer and closer.
She's close enough that I can hear her angry voice through the slats of the boards. "...where the FUCK did that scrawny little cunt go!? What the fuck Tamara!!"
HaHA! Outsmarted you!! I think a little smugly, though my heart is still pounding so loud you'd think she could hear it. This gazebo is old - thin lines of light stretch above me because the floorboards have warped over time. I can hear her almost perfectly...and that means she could probably hear me too.
"I'm looking!" Comes Tamara's irritated voice to my right. Oh shit shit shit! Tamara must be limping back around the gazebo!! If she's looking she might see where I crashed through the lilac bush. Shit damn hell if that gorilla cronie sees where I hid she'll tell Flora and Flora is right above me and FUCKIN HELL SHE'LL DO A FULL OUT SMACKDOWN ON THOSE BOARDS ABOVE ME AND DRAG ME OUT THROUGH THE SPLINTERS AND PAINT THIS DAMN PARK RED WITH MY BABY BITCH BLOOD FUCKKK---
While my brain is realizing how much of a horror film my life has just become, PugFace Flora Harkin paces back and forth above me. Tamara's gimping footsteps to my right crunch through the leaves and branches and I feel my heart promptly punch up into my throat to cut off any air flow.
Ohhh shit!!!! My mind races and I want to try and scoot further under but run the risk of making a bunch of racket with all the leaves under here---I can't even attempt to reach my phone because she'd hear me!! Oh sweet Mary Mother of Jeezus if I should die today please ensure that my cats are well taken care of--
An angry shout from the left has me jumping, and apparently frightened Flora because I heard her flinch above, and then curse. She CLOMP CLOMP CLOMPS off the gazebo with her giantess steps and says: "C'mon Tamara! Fucking asshole is here! Let's go!"
I hear Tamara rustle away on my right and listen to them run along the grass until I can't anymore. 'Fucking asshole is here'? My terrified brain does a few loops before it can finally get enough bearing to realize who she might mean.
Abel!!
My heart leaps for joy - he scared her off!! I hear Abel's angry voice again, sounding like it's saying Flora's name, and then my phone is suddenly buzzing in my pocket. Hoping Flora and Tamara are long gone, I scrabble through the leaves so I can shift sideways and try to pull my phone out. When I finally grab it, its of course Abel calling.
I answer- "Hello!" I sound breathless and terrified, which at this point I don't bother hiding.
"Clarisse!" His voice is almost panicked but relieved. "Where are you? I'm at the park, I just saw Flora, her and Tamara just ran off through the trees. Are you in your van or something?"
I shift in the leaves so I can attempt to crawl out. "No, I'm under the fucking gazebo."
"What?"
Crawling on your elbows and holding a phone to your ear is fucking difficult, just so you guys know. I feel like a god damn victim in a TV drama. Fuck this shit! I manage to poke my head out from the little gap and say, "I'm under the damn fucking gazebo. Flora chased me so I hid under here."
"What? Ohmygod--" His voice trails off because the phone leaves his mouth but I can hear a whicshhh sound, maybe because he's running.
Running to me.. The thought gives my heart a little jolt. I'm just about to drag myself forward when I hear him calling to me, his voice thick with worry.
"Clarisse? Clarisse?" There's a clump clump as he partially climbs the steps but then probably realizes there is no one in the gazebo.
"Over here!" I shout to him, and then he's somehow around the back side of the gazebo, fast as hell. He almost runs by my spot until I call to him again. "Abel!"
It was almost comical, watching him hit the breaks and spin around through the lilac bush branches. Then he's crouching and looking through the thick trunk parts of the bush, looking bug-eyed as hell.
"What the hell!" He gasps as he comes crashing through the bush himself to reach me. A million questions are firing from his mouth. "Are you ok? Did she hurt you? What are you doing under there?! How did you get there? Are you ok?!"
My heart is still pounding in my chest, though now with Flora and Tamara gone, I wonder what the hell is all worked up about? Don't play dumb ya corny bitch! My inner self yells at me.
"I'm fine," I say, finally getting my ass and legs out from my little hiding space. He goes to grab me to help me up but his hand hits the sore spot on my left armpit and I yelp.
Yep. I yelped. Like a puppy. Not even ashamed that I yelped into his presence because that shit HURT.
"YeeeOOWW!! Fuck!!" I grab the sore spot and sit back down on my ass.
"What happened? What did she do?" Abel is talking fast and squats right beside me, one hand on my shoulder and the other on my knee.
You'd think, under the circumstances of, y'know, me being chased by two feral Sasquatch girls hellbent on smearing my Baby Bitch Blood on any and all surfaces in the vicinity, and me having to hide underneath an old fucking gazebo to get away, I'd be more focused on that whole traumatic and pee-inducing experience...But, nope. Abel's proximity, his hands on me, his absolute concern for my wellbeing, has a zippy little spark jolting through and around my chest and having a full blush filling my cheeks.
Hormones we almost died THIS IS NOT THE FUCKING TIME.
Hormones: HAHA FUCK YOU BITCH *cranks the teenage girl shit to 200%*
"N-Nothing Abel," I say, feeling incredibly aware of his big warm hand on my shoulder. "She hardly got to touch me. She chased me a bunch but I tried to hide and then WHAMOO I ran into a fucking branch."
Whamoo'? 'WHAMOO'? What are we DOING brain what kind of word is 'whamoo'?! Holy shit I should just go hide under the fucking gazebo again.
"You ran into a branch?" His dark worried eyes look me over several times in the span of 0.5 seconds, and then they find my armpit. He gently moves my jacket. "Oh shit Clarisse, you're bleeding!!"
"I am?" I look at my arm. My jacket has a hole in it - maybe about the size of a dime. Looking at my pale green polo underneath I can see a much smaller hole right at the fold of my shirt in the armpit, and there I can see a little blood. Seeing it seems to just make the sting that much worse. "Shit, I am!"
"Oh gosh, we need to get that looked at, should we call your parents--"
"No!!" I cut him off immediately. "No way! My mother would fucking kill me."
Abel frowns at me. "'Kill you'? Why? You got hurt by my fuckwad cousin-"
"Nooo!" I snap, again efficiently cutting him off. "I ran into a branch. She was chasing me, but my mother can NEVER know that okay? I'm serious Abel- you don't know my mother. She's an absolute spazz and if she ever found out something like this was happening to me my life would become a living hell. I got the flu once and the house was on total lock down." No seriously, I was blocked in my room and she wore a mask and only fed me crackers and water and ugh that was a nightmare. At the end of my tirade I move to try and cross my arms with some finality but that of course hurts so I just end of wincing.
Ah, smooth move Clarisse. Super smooth.
"Good Christ-" Abel says, glowering at me - ooo sexy angry Abel hehehe - and then is sliding his hand down my back. "Alright fine- but I have to call my parents. Flora's parents realized she wasn't home and when word got to me I sped over here as fast as I could." His dark eyes flash with sadness and some embarrassment. "I'm sorry this happened to you...kind of ruined my plans."
My blush deepens as I follow his lead and stand up - or more like crouch, because of the lilac bushes - and start to step through the branches to get out. "It's fine. But um...what was the plan?"
The girly part of my brain splits into two sections. Type A) It could have been a CUTE ASS DATE with something like A PICNIC OR STARGAZING!! Type B) Orrr he was going to RAVISH YOU IN THE ROSE BUSHES WITH HIS GODLIKE HANDS--- I very quickly shut that part of my brain down.
A warm smile graces his otherwise somber face. "My Grandma and I were gonna meet you here with Zita. She's been so good and Grandma has been training her and everything so Grandma wanted to just meet up and show you...which I thought was weird because, well, you live next door but Grandma loves taking her to this park so insisted we try to meet here."
"Oh." I can't lie and say I'm not disappointed - the girly parts of my brain are crying out sadly because Abel's reasoning to meet me wasn't some 'date' or anything...although...Meeting with Abel's snoopy Grandma and her little dog we helped her get is still damn cute, and I feel warmth budding in my chest. I did something nice to them and they wanted to thank me. "Well...some other time maybe! Or I'll just have to go over and see Zita and your Grandma myself"
Abel pulls me from the bush and gives me a broad smile - its so attractive its unnerving. "She'd love that." His smile disappears as he steps closer to me to examine my little wound. "But we should get this looked at."
"I'm sure its fine Abel." I pull the collar of my polo out to peek down at the sore. It doesn't look very big or deep - it looks more like a scrape with a teeny hole at the base of my arm. Its not bleeding anymore and there isn't much blood to begin with. It just stings like a motherfucker.
His arm is still around me as he begins to guide me around the gazebo. "It needs to get cleaned before it gets infected Clarisse. How would you explain that to your mom?"
Err-- I scramble around my brain to find a quick excuse but there's nothing coming...any injury at all my mother would IMMEDIATELY flip a lid on and investigate. Abel smirks at my silence and continues walking with me. I suppose I could drive over to the clinic...but my family doctor would definitely tell my mom (the bill would show up at the house?), and I know for sure the front desk receptionist would say something to mom even if I asked the doctor to keep things confidential because the receptionist and my mom are old college friends or something.
"Well...um. I'll figure something out..." I say slowly, my mind working to find an answer. The wind blows cold and Abel's warm hand on my back changes to his big arm around my shoulders. Ohhhh Shittt. Cool it brain! It's fine its fine...
"I can help you. We can just stop over at my brother Joseph's work. He works at a chiropractor's office but I know they've got medical supplies there." Abel has his phone out now and looks like he's about to make a call.
"What, would they care--" I'm about to ask but then I see he's calling someone. He gives me an apologetic look but then is speaking to who I believe is his mom.
"Hey, yea, I saw her." 'Her'? Me? Wait no, Flora!! Duh, obviously his family is worried about getting Flora home...she must be on like house arrest or something.
We've reached the parking lot now but as I'm about to veer toward my van Abel tightens his arm around my shoulder and gently tugs me in the direction of his truck. I frown at him and he just smirks at me. As he answers his mother (mostly just 'yep' and 'nope') he opens the truck door open for me and I scramble up and in.
Welp, I guess I going to see Abel's brother's work place now. Normally, I'd be panicking because I don't know most of the plan, but as of late, I'm learning to accept that I don't have to be in absolute control of everything...plus, Abel might be my only option to get my armpit looked at and since it does sting I know that I should. He's pretty focused on the conversation on the phone but while he drives looks over and gives me a reassuring little smile, than puts a fire in my belly.
For some reason, just riding in his truck with him gives me a storm of butterflies that I can't beat down.
"No mom...I don't know what she was doing at the park." Says Abel now on the phone, and I realize that he must be covering for me...He'd told his family that Flora had been harassing a classmate but hadn't ever mentioned whom - his expression looks sour and I can imagine why. He wants them to know now, so Flora can fess up and get what she deserves, but he respects that I don't want any further drama from this.
Christ...the poor kid. He's just trying to do the right thing and even that is difficult because I make it difficult in a way...granted, I'm not like pressing charges or anything but still. He still has to cover for someone...
"Is she home? Okay...that's good. Yea. I know Mom. I'll be home later. Yea, love you too." Okay, AWWWW because my bitchy ass doesn't even say that to my mom. Abel hangs up and then sighs heavily, slouching in the driver's seat.
There's a few moments of silence - a country song that insists the girl is a 'heartache on the dance floor' croons quietly between us - before I get the courage to ask a question.
"So um..what's uh, the plan for Flora?"
I mean, my plan would be to straight jacket her ass in like 18 straight jackets and then drop her into some kind of lonely ass dark cell in the middle of an island in the middle of an ocean surrounded by sharks and electric eels so she can never ever ever leave but, y'know, that's just me.
"Well..." Abel sighs and then runs a hand through his dark, curly hair, appearing frustrated and glorious all at once. "So far, just pull her from school. They're trying to figure out stuff with her therapist...I don't know, like I said, her mom, my Aunt Anita, isn't a fan of me in general so I'm sort of out of that loop. I know the last time she lost her shit like this they talked about a place that works with teenagers with temper issues. Maybe that's what they'll do."
His tone is friendly yet closed; it's obviously not something he really wants to talk about and I take the hint in full stride. "Oh. I see. Um, good." Still...a straight jacket....
Abel turns his blinker on and his now turning into a little strip-mall with three businesses sharing the building. An insurance place is on the far left, a massage therapy business in the middle, and Kagley Chiropractic is on the right, and I imagine this is where Abel's brother works.
Abel pulls around the back, and as we drive by I notice that lights are off. "Are they closed?"
Abel nods as he parks directly in front of the back door. "Yea, they're all at a conference/training kind of thing out in California this week. But I've got a key - I helped answer phones this last summer."
Helped answer phones? I imagine Abel sitting behind the front desk with a coffee in his hand, answering phone calls and greeting customers. I can't hide my giggle as I jump down from the truck. He squints at me. "What are you laughing at?"
"I don't know, imagining you as a front desk receptionist!" The image of muscular, darkly attractive, Zeus Jr working the front desk is fucking HILARIOUS.
He smirks at me. "I wasn't the receptionist! That's Jan's job...I just helped with the phone when she was busy!"
Abel unlocks the back door and turns the light on in a little hallway area. The hallway stretches to the front where I can see part of the front desk and the waiting area, but the rest of the hallway is just many doors - I imagine offices and rooms for therapy.
Abel opens the first door on the left and switches the light on. It honestly looks a lot like any room from any normal clinic - computer on a desk and cupboards in one corner, a little examination table on the other, posters of health and exercises on the walls...though, as I step into the room, and Abel shuts the door, I'm reminded that this isn't the fucking clinic I'm at a chiropractic office after hours with an attractive boy and we're apparently going to fix my fucking ARMPIT WOUND WHAT THE HELL ARE WE GONNA DO OH SHIT DAMN HELL---
Soooo yep. I stand beside the little examination table, my face burning up a little, and Abel I think stands a ways behind me, and I think he realizes how awkward this seems because he coughs and randomly pulls out the chair that is at the computer desk and sits down in it.
"Sooo...Dr. Harkin, what's the diagnosis?" I say. Whoa! Snarky Brain where have you been this entire time!?
Abel looks up at me and smirks. "I don't know yet, I haven't seen it yet."
"Well let's fix it, dammit!" I say. I'm not quite sure where all this bravado is coming from, but its raging up and consuming the butterflies in my stomach. Somehow I'm nervous to be here but...exhilarated at the same time!! Plus, my fucking armpit hurts and I do want it to get fixed.
I ain't ready to be no cripple!
His expression changes, a pleased but surprised look popping up his so often heavy eyebrows and he says, "Okay..." Then he turns and starts digging into the cabinet, pulling out gloves and what looks like an antiseptic wipe. I shrug my jacket off, feeling my heart starting to pound a little harder.
It's fine it's fine he's JUST gonna clean it up-- I then start to roll up my sleeve, wincing as I do. Abel drags the chair up closer, looking intent but I see a slight blush on his face. This polo is an older one so its smaller and harder to roll up and actually tightens up into the wound. "Shit!" I say.
Abel has the gloves on now and leans in close, looking very seriously - SERIOUSLY CUTE HOT DAMN - at my shoulder. "How bad does it hurt? What kind of pain?"
"Um..." Okay brain, do the brain thing DO THE BRAIN THING. "Uhh, it just hurts. Like um, stinging I guess." What a pathetic brain thing...
He's gently moved my hands away and trying to look up my sleeve. He sounds so professional, but the faint blush on his cheeks gives away some possible nerves. "Okay. That's good. Means it shouldn't be a deep cut."
I'm embarrassed, but a flicker of joy (or hysteria??) bubbles up my throat into a small laugh. Abel, fine-ass Zeus Jr glowering up my tiny polo sleeve to look at my armpit is somehow FUCKING HILARIOUS. The laugh escapes of course, and I whip my hand up to cover it. I failed obviously.
He glances up at me, cute, sexy, maybe slightly embarrassed, and gives me this sweet teasing smile. "The hell are you laughing at?"
AH FUCK FUCK HE'S TOO CUTE. My face burns up and I have to look away, still giggling like a damn maniac. OKAY BRAIN THIS IS THE WRONG BRAIN THING STOP THE LAUGHING ITS CREEPY. "Just you..." Abel tries to roll my sleeve up again and then I hiss in pain because it FUCKING STINGS.
"Sorry!" He says, stopping to pat my knee.
"It's fine." His patting my knee somehow has my heart leaping in my chest. Gahh I feel so hot and sweaty. Abel now is using his thumb to gently push the antiseptic wipe up my sleeve - LIKE SERIOUSLY THIS IS HILARIOUS AND STUPID WTF HAHAHA - and as my brain almost has me hysteria-giggling the antiseptic touches my little wound and I gasp. "OOOOoooo! Fuck! Not fine!"
He immediately withdraws his hands, sitting back, his expression almost terrified. "Sorry sorry sorry. I didn't think I'd get that much on it. Sorry I'm not really that good at this. I've taken a few first aid courses and been to some nursing camps so I should be better at this..."
Through my teeth I say, "It's fine. It just stung that's all." Like someone just squirted lemon juice into my eye except it wasn't my eye and it wasn't lemon juice.
He leans forward, peeping up my sleeve again. "I just wish I could actually see it. Or get to it. Maybe I wouldn't hurt you again." He gently pulls the fabric, trying to roll it but getting nowhere because rolling it up just makes it thicker and hard to get passed.
He frowns at it, then gives me a little smile. "Could I...cut it? Just enough to see?"
"No!" I immediately say. Then I think about it and...."No..." I say again, groaning and leaning my head back on the headrest. "My mom would notice and ask."
"You have a jacket, just cover it up?" He sounds hopeful, apparently excited by his idea.
I think for a moment, and then shake my head again. "No. She'd notice. Plus, I like this shirt!" Small and old as it is, I don't want it ruined! There's a reason why I've kept it.
"Well...shit." Abel signs.
"Yea..." I say, feeling a little hopeless. I could look at the sore myself...but I'd probably have to take my shirt off. And I can't do that here! Maybe I could make him leave...
Well, you could do it here. My brain says to me. I want to slam the idea down but logic somehow swims up with the thought. So what if you take your shirt off? It's like a swim suit top! You wore a bikini...like once! And it was fine. Nobody batted an eye. And dammit you're nearly an adult. Let him look at the damn little sore so it can get cleaned properly.
WHOA WHAT THE HELL AM I ACTUALLY THINKING ABOUT THIS WHAT THE HELL-- As what feels like a mid-life crisis unfolds in my mind (who am I anymore? WHAT'S GOING ON WITH MEEEE) , Abel is talking aloud, almost more to himself than me.
"...actually pretty interested in becoming a nurse. That's why I've been to so many nursing camps. I like it a lot honestly. The doctor's never scared me, and there aren't many male nurses out there." Abel is carefully trying the thumb-with-the-antiseptic-wipe-up-my-arm-pit trick again, and since I'm so muddled up in my thoughts I say nothing against it until it touches the wound and---
"OUCH! Dammit!" I flinch so hard I scrunch Abel's hand into my armpit - into the wound. I hiss again, and pulls away and then is right back to me, rubbing my shoulder and sounding as if he'd just run me over.
"Fuck fuck fuck I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to! I'm sorry Clarisse, jeezus, sorry--"
Okay THIS IS MISERABLE AND SUCKS I don't like PAIN let's fucking fix this! "It's fine Abel," I say through my teeth. God dammit, why is my life so complicated?
"Let's just go to a clinic," Abel suggests, standing up now. His dark eyes are worried, his skin still pink from embarrassment, his comforting hands resting on my shoulder and my knee. "I'm sorry - this was a stupid idea."
"No, it's fine," I feel bad. But he steps back, sighing again, looking guilty and sad. The sad tilt of his mouth and the lackluster look in his eye just gets to me. He's just trying to help me...
I feel the color deepening in my face as the idea forms again. No no no no...that's WEIRD. That's CRAZY. NO...I feel like a crazy person, but then take a deep breath and say, "Turn around."
Abel looks up from the gloves he was starting to take up, squinting through his ridiculously long eyelashes in confusion. "What?"
"Turn around!" I snap, feeling my heart start to pound and a twist in my gut and a tornado of fluttering butterflies in my stomach. Oh fuck what am I saying WHATAMISAYING? The burning blush singes through my ears and up my face, quite literally feeling like a hot wave across my skin. I glance up at him and down again, my hands finding the edge of my shirt. No BIG DEAL. NO BIG DEAL IT'S FINE IT'S FINE. I AM FINE—
The moment Abel catches on was interesting - almost fun - to watch. His eyes follow the shift of my hands to my shirt, and the recognition of my intentions was visible in the popping up of his eyebrows, the quick scan of my upper body, the nuance of his light blush from strawberry lemonade to bubblegum pink; the coloring brighter, surprised, excited.
"Are you sure? You don't have to-" He says, eyes connecting to mine, so many emotions flashing in them and AH SHIT DAMN HELL HE'S TOO ATTRACTIVE--
"Yes I'm fine!" I snap again. "Just turn around!"
He whips around with an 'okay!', and the second he's turned around I take about 5 seconds to just let my brain wrap around this.
WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING AM I GOING TO DO THIS? IS IT FINE? IS HE FINE? AM I FINE? I THINK I'M FINE ITS FINE ITS FINE HE LOOKS LIKE ITS FINE ITS NOT WEIRD ITS FINE YOU'RE AN ADULT YOU'RE A BIG GIRL IF YOU WANNA TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF YOU CAN ITS FINE YOU'RE 18 DAMN YEARS OLD ITS FINE WHATEVER JUST FUCKING DO IT---
Midway through that wild rant I pull my shirt up, heart hammering like a it's about to explode, wince at the sting in my armpit, and then carefully slide it over the right half of my body and then over my head, and then gently pull it over my left shoulder and arm. I glance at Abel and he's still facing the wall, arms crossed, looking maybe a little tense, and it makes me nervous because SHIT HE'S IN THE ROOM AND I'M IN MY BRA OOH GOD and so I whip the shirt onto my chest, hugging the collar over my boobs and pulling it down as for over my body.
OHMYGOD.
I just took my shirt off with a boy in the room. I JUST TOOK MY SHIRT OFF WITH A BOY IN THE ROOMMMM—-
My mind just goes wild with unintelligible babble and it must take more than 10 seconds because I hear Abel say quietly.
"...you ready?" I flinch at the sound, feel my heart kick it up too almost-a-heart-attack level, then swallow my fear.
"Yup." My voice is somehow vaguely confident.
He turns around, his cheeks still bright pink but eye glittering bright. He's excited about this. He's excited about you not wearing a shirt.
My mental voice's statement gives me this strange heat flash in my gut- it's trembly like fear but not.
Abel sits down beside me on his stool, and when he looks at me he holds his gaze; that trembly warm feeling in my gut spreads up my chest.
Ahhh shit- I have too look away. Can't do it! I'm not brave! Can't do it!! Shit shit shit. I stare intently at my feet, face burning bright red.
Abel gently lifts my left arm and says, "Can you stretch your arm out? Like that yea...it doesn't look too bad actually. I was worried it would be worse. Not deep thankfully. I see some splinters in it though."
He grabs another antiseptic wipe, then asks, "Can I try this again?" I can feel him looking at me and I give him the briefest of glances. BREATHE BREATHE BREATHE—
"Yep. That's fine." He moves to touch the little wound and I find myself saying, "But don't kill me now."
He chuckles and I high five myself for somehow being funny while I'm nervous. HAHA it's not that scary I'm just... shirtless... oh god. I'm shirtless. My little boobies are damn near on display- oh fuck me ITS FINE DONT WORRY—-
And so for the next few minutes Abel gently cleans the sore, takes a tweezers and pulls a few really small splinters from it, then sets to bandaging it up. He's quiet and focused on what he's doing - and damn he's pretty efficient at it - but I can feel this strange buzz between us.
Okay heart, cool it man, I'm too young for cardiac arrest!! As he gently Riggs the gauze under my armpit and up around my shoulder my polo shifts a little, almost exposing the side of my bra. I see his eyes flicker down and back up, back to focusing on his task, and then his eyes flit up to me. His gaze feels heavy somehow- heavy and hot and very intentional.
The moment lasts for maybe half a second but it's enough to make my heart dam near stop. I look away, feeling like I'm going to jump out of my skin- not because I'm afraid, but because I wasn't afraid.
What the hell Clarisse!!
I stare intently at my hideous slip-ons, desperate to avoid Abel-Zeus Jr's heavy gaze... but so much of me wants to keep looking. Holy shit what's going on with me?!
You're gaining confidence in what you want... My brain whispers to me, ever present and ever annoying and ever vague.
What the fuck is it I want??
Of course, Brain is silent on that subject. FUCK.
Abel is now using athletic tape to finish up- his hands are so big and so warm and steady and my heart is ready to just beat it's way out of my chest and run across the room and bounce about. If you asked me what my name was I'd probably just blurt random ass gibberish.
"Looks good now. Might have to leave it for a day or two but I think it should be okay. But if it gets infected you should seriously go see an actual clinic." Abel says to me, smirking while trying to look all serious (and looking seriously sexy while doing itttt).
"I'm sure it'll be fine," I say, my voice feeling almost shaky- am I afraid? Am I nervous? What is this—- but still sounding semi alright. Abel stands, towering, eyes admiring his handiwork. He just looks at me and smiles. Then we sit there awkwardly for a solid 5 seconds.
"...uh could you turn around Dr. Harkin?" I hear myself say, somehow coming off as snarky and teasing- apart from the tiniest nervous hitch in my voice at the end. Dude lemme put my shirt back on this is nerve wracking!
"Oh fuck yep-" The brief look of total embarrassment on his face is enough to make me want to giggle like a maniac again and I have to fight the urge. We do not need to go full Joker on him, that would be a fucking no no!
After he's turned I quickly flip the shirt and yank it over my head, but my hair gets caught in the button and I grunt out an 'ouch!'. Abel starts, looking ready to half turn but stops himself - awww he's tryinnggg not to be a perv! - saying instead, "You okay?"
"Yep--" Nope nope nope nope. I attempt to pull my head through but get nowhere because it HURTS.
Uhh no. Picture this. It's a fucking disaster. My head is through my polo, but since I'd yanked it on so fast my hair caught on the top button so I have to crank it hard to the left - my polo half covering my body, neither arm through the arm holes, half folded against my chest like a fucking dumbass T-Rex...
I grudgingly attempt to reach my button-caught-hair (DAMN THIS LEAVEY HAIR FUCK ME) which of course forces me to basically just lift the shirt up as it lays on my forearms. Maybe a solid minute goes by as I try to free myself from this mess, my heart beating angrily in frustration. In the process, I've managed to tangle my glasses in my hair too. So, tangled as hell, I can't take the polo off, even though its not fully on.
"Clarisse?" I look up from cursing under my breath (shitdamnFUCKhell...) and trying to untwist my hair from my buttons. Abel is half looking over his shoulder at me, looking concerned. Ah FUCK - I drop my arms and my polo kind of settles over me like a hideous evil poncho from hell. I sigh, looking down, and my glasses stay kind of up because they're stuck in my hair.
"No, Dr. Harkin, I'm not alright." I grumble under my breath. I can hear Abel laugh. My God, WHAT ELSE CAN YOU DO TO ME?!
"I'm gonna help you, no bones about it," He says, and he comes over snickering to himself. Ohmyfuck, I can't even look at him. How do I face him HOW DOES THIS SHIT HAPPEN TO ME WHAT THE FUCK.
Sexy ass Zeus Jr settles back onto the stool again, shaking his head, smiling, being all too damn attractive and somehow handling the random ass shit that I manage to get myself into. "Just hold still, let me get your glasses first."
Gentle hands carefully pull the hair from my glasses - well gentle as he can be, he still hurts me a bit but not enough for me to say anything. As he sits this close, helping me yet again, I can't help but just fucking stare at him because ohmyfuck guys. He's a babe. An absolute babe. Eyelashes like some female movie stair, a neat little nose...his hands are right at eye level and I take them in too. Strong, firm, scratched and just the least bit still colored from bruising.
Thinking of the fight makes me sad for a split second, remembering how difficult the aftermath of that was for him... but just as I'm about to focus on something other than how god damn embarrassed and nervous I am when Abel has gently disentangled my glasses from my own fucking hair.
"Ha!" He says, looking gleeful and adorable - like baby Zeus who just smote his first village or something. "Got it." And with this sudden comfortable certainty, Abel gently brushed my shaggy hair from my face (apart from the stuff that is stuck on the damn button), and carefully placed them on my face. The gesture is so sweet that I freeze - my heart stopping solidly. He locks our gazes for a few seconds, dark eyes somehow glowing, then just smiles a little at me and proceeds to lean even closer to me to start untangling my hair from my stupid button.
Holy shit damn hell. I just died. Just fucking died. What what what---
He's quiet as he helps me and looks so settled and comfortable now it's almost unnerving for me - it was almost vaguely easy for me to be nervous when he had almost seemed nervous too, but NOW? I'm gonna just melt into the floor and drown in my own anxiety confusion dammit.
I wrap my arms around my own waist, and it feels so strange because I'm naked. Well, not naked but you know what I mean! The polo is covering me, but it's so awkward...after a few more moments Abel's heavy brow furrows a little and he frowns. "How the hell did you do this?"
"I dunno man."
He gives me a flash of a smirk. "Were you in a hurry."
Oh Jeezus he did not-- "Um, YAH." I spit back at him, feeling full snark on despite my awkward-terror-heart-attack going on in my chest.
He says nothing, just smirks a little wider as he keeps messing with the button; he's so close I could just lean forward and touch foreheads. My heart beat ramps up at the thought. Half my brain is squealing in delight while the rest of me is just dying with nervous jitters. I feel like a god damn maraca of emotions dammit! A FUCKING MARACA--
"Can I just pull the button off?" Abel says now, glowering. Oh gosh how is he cute while glowering?
"I mean sure," If it gets me out of this awkward as fuck situation I'd have damn near let you cut my hair.
In a swift motion Abel pops off the button, then carefully strings my hair from it. "OH! Awesome!" I say, surprised and relieved. Oh hell yes just gotta--
I'm about to lean away and fix my shirt but Abel leans with me - staying in close. That certain look is on his face again, and he's attentively brushing my hair from my face and off my shoulders. Oh fuck -- But his hands find my shirt, and he's lift my left shoulder and stretching the fabric a little. "Here - be careful with your arm ok, just slide it in."
He's helping me but my shirt on.
Mildly (and physically hehe) touched by his thoughtfulness, I left him guide my arm through the arm hole. It stings a little and Abel notices my expression; he rubs my arm. Once that arm is through, I work on the other, feeling this terrible jitteriness burning through my entire body. I feel like I'm full of bees or butterflies or fucking something trembly and warm and god I'm SWEATING like a damn hog...
I adjust my shirt, pulling it down and look up to Abel's dark, heavy eyes on me. They trailed up from my hands on the edge of my shirt, as if he'd been hoping for a different outcome to that, and I felt that trembly feeling in my skin burrow into my chest again, scorching to my belly.
There he is. My brain says to me, and I don't understand I don't understand--
My brain doesn't seem to know what to do but my body has a vague idea...I sit stone still, locked with this impossibly strong, attractive, caring boy and while my body is still my heart seizes up and prepares to explode.
He-
The build up in my heart explodes into motion. I'm somehow letting out a loud sigh, eyes shooting all over the room and not at Abel and I turn the other way and hop off the chair. "Okay, cool we should get going!" I hear myself say, and my brain is a giant tangly mess, as if its turned into my hair.
What-
I don't allow it to finish because I'm walking around the examination table, heart still POUNDING POUNDING in my chest, like a fast beat that I have to walk to. Gotta go gotta goo, I don't know why but---
I glance at Abel as I bee-line for the door and he's standing too, but smiling still, his eyes still warm, almost knowing. I feel myself pause for a second at the door. His eyes his eyes - he's got me again, I'm stuck in his gaze, those dark dark eyes oh god he's taking a breath, his mouth parts--
"Let's go!" I say, my voice high pitched, obviously nervous as hell, and I turn and fast walk my anxious ass down the hall, arms pumping at my sides like some mall-walking granny. Oh god oh god oh god just BREATHE. What am I DOING--
I'm at the door, I open the door, I book it towards his truck. He must be behind me because the lights flicker and I hear the locks click. I pull open the big shiny black door and hop up, heart still pounding, still beating like the sound of -- of---of what exactly?
I'm so focused on I don't even know that I'm pulling the door closed and don't realize Abel is right behind me; his hand catches mine and I freeze. He steps forward and hands me my jacket. Through my heart pounding in my ears I hear him say, "You forgot your coat."
"Oh..sorry." I say, and then I'm looking at him, he's right there, resting the jacket in my lap. Something in that certain look, that confident star-night gaze just freezes me up and I feel my entire body explode into trembly thrilling terror. What the absolute fuck--
In the next instant he's kissing me.
It's deep, chaotic thing - hungry and wild and so much more than I can handle but feel his hot mouth on mine, his breath, his hands on my waist and the back of my neck and I find myself leaning forward as if I know what the fuck I'm doing. What what what-- is in my brain but everything just explodes into confusing fire and I let it I let it I let it.
It was a few seconds of heat, encompassing and wild and terrifying, and then Abel's lips move down to my jaw and to my neck, his hands strong and hard and grasping on my waist, my back, damn near my chest. He takes a deep inhale at my neck and my head pops out of the fog of whatever-the-fuck-just-happened to wonder WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED?!
I JUST KISSED ABEL HARKIN?!
My brain process anything but my hands unclench from the shoulders of his shirt and I realize that I don't want to let go.
He pulls his dark curly head up to meet my gaze, grinning, midnight eyes just burning like the deepest summer night of your life. His hands slide up to grasp either side of my face. "Fuck I've wanted to do that a long time."
My heart soars, pounding pounding POUNDING POUNDING so loud I don't think I can breath but that sentence quirks the tiniest smile on my face and Abel catches that smile with another kiss. This one just strong and wild - almost too much as he practically pulls me out of the passenger seat of the truck, hands everywhere and so hot and strong and and and--
Breathe Clarisse! I pull back to gasp a breath and he laughs into my neck and I find myself laughing too, my heart still pounding so loud I can't believe he hasn't said anything about. What what WHAT WHAT WHAT IS GOING THE FUCK ON WHY HOW IS THIS HAPPENING--
Abel pulls back now to look at me and I can't bear to make eye contact - WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK - but he just laughs, hands rubbing my back. So comfortable, so certain, so confident. A twinge of terror streaks across my chest - what is he certain of does he think I'm good at this or that I know what I'm doing HE DOESN'T WANT TO HAVE SEX RIGHT NOW DOES OH FUCK ME OR WAIT NOT BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M DOING I'M NOT GOOD AT THIS I DON'T KNOW WHAT I WANT--
"Hey," His voice is quiet, close, in my ear. He leans back and bends down to get into my field of view, smiling as I make red-faced eye contact with him. "Sorry if that was a lot. I just...fuck I've wanted to that so long."
My heart leaps up into my throat while my chest burns.
______
Hiiiii :D