"I wish that I was good enough
If only I could wake you up
I wish you cared a little more
I wish you told me this before"
I watched as Billy for out of his dark blue camaro and walked up to my doorstep. I heard him knock on the door but I didn't budge. My mother answered the door and greeted him. She sent him up to my room. I didn't turn my head or move to greet him. I didn't even want to see him anymore.
"You said you wanted the truth, and that's why I'm here to tell you the truth." He moved out of the door way and walked into my room. I shifted bringing my knees up to my chest as I stared out of the window.
"I don't want to talk anymore. I don't care about the truth anymore Billy. You broke my heart isn't that enough?" I said softly.
"That was never my intention." I could hear the sympathy in his voice and the tears pricked my eyes.
"I wish that I was good enough." I looked at him meeting his blue eyes with mine so he could see the hurt and the pain.
"You are, you're too good for me." He looked down and bit the inside of his cheek.
"You could've broke up with me before you slept with her." I started looking at him.
"I told you I wasn't any good. I never once lied about that." He tried to justify what he did and I scoffed at him.
"That doesn't mean you had to fuck her. And to tell me I'm too good for you is just an asshole thing to say. I loved you with everything I had and you shit on me Billy. All your doing is proving your father right when you do things like this." I spat my words like venom with intentions to hurt him in someway.
"I'm sorry," was all he could say as he hung his head.
"You can't even look at me Billy. I wish you cared a little more but you don't, so go. Go and never come back." I pointed to the door and he walked out.
This is why I don't fall in love. My heart aches as he walked away. I just wanted to forgive him but I knew I couldn't. With every step he took my heart broke but I knew it was for the better.