HATE
"Will you stop pestering me?!" I hissed. "And stop demanding things! You are not the boss of me. I do what I want! I say what I want!"
Nanggigigil na talaga ako. I feel so mad and annoyed at him. He is making me feel emotions that I dislike! Ayoko ng mga pinaparamdam niya sa akin!
Lumayo ako sa kanya. Ansel read that move. Napansin ko ang pagigting ng bagang niya.
"Ansel, I am warning you. Come close to me more that a feet apart and I won't think twice about cutting off your dick," banta ko at ramdam ang panginginig ng kamay ko.
Ansel chuckled and licked his lower lip. "Sino lugi? You're my wife."
"Papaano ako malulugi?! Pakialam ko jan! I never agreed with this marriage in the first place. So make a distance, Mr. Monterro. Hindi ako nakikipagbiruan."
"Come on Iana, where's the fun in that?"
Fun?! Ihampas ko sa kanya pamaypay e!
"In your perverted mouth and itchy dick that seemed to bed hundreds of women!"
"What an accusation," Ansel smirked. "Didn't you get a taste of my mouth a week ago?"
Namula ako. And I am pretty sure it is because of anger! "I did. And that's the last time I'm ever touching you that close!"
"Huwag kang magsalita ng patapos, Miss Torres."
Inirapan ko siya. "That was a mistake. It's over. That was just a simple kiss. Walang laman 'yon. No feelings. Just the sex hormones speaking."
Tumaas ang sulok ng labi niya at hindi na nagsalita. His emotionless eyes bore to mine. Pero napansin ko ang paggalaw ng ulo niya. It's as if he motioned somebody to come.
Napatingin ako sa lalaking tuluyang lumapit sa kanya at may binigay na coat. It looked beautiful and well tailored. Napaawang ang labi ko nang akmang lalapit si Ansel sa akin pero natigilan siya.
His brows furrowed before he sighed. Nilahad niya sa akin ang coat. "Wear it."
Agad kong tinanggap at sinuot, masama pa rin ang tingin sa kanya. We are still at the backstage though which is alright because I have to change at the dressing room. We are also away from the eyes of the crowd which is a good thing.
Nagtaka ako dahil umurong si Ansel at humakbang palayo sa akin.
"I will not touch you. Unless you'll beg me to," he said lowly for only me to hear it.
Tinaasan ko siya ng naghahamong kilay. "As if I would," I scoffed.
"You can never tell, Miss Torres," his eyes went down on my lips before he smirked. "You will beg me for it. Believe me."
I just glared at him before walking away.
In his dreams! Ang hambog ng ferson today! Does he really think that I'll thirst for him and beg for his touch and kisses?!
Napapikit ako nang maalala kung papaano niya angkinin ang labi ko last week. The way his hands held me and touched me in my sensitive areas. The way his lips nibbled and sucked on my lips, intruding my thoughts and sanity. He was an expert. Masasabi kong napakagaling niya. He could make any woman want him and kneel for him.
I felt my body burn and my cheeks heat up. The hell am I even reminiscing?! He had fucked lots of women already! And he is a manwhore, Iana! You wouldn't want to involve yourself with a man like him. He is a sick bastard who only wants you for a challenge, a game, and probably your body.
Hindi ako magpapadala sa tukso o sa kahit anong galawan niya! We're only married in papers. I don't care kung mambabae siya. He can have them and do whatever he wants as long as hindi niya ako papakealam kay Arco.
"So, Mrs. Monterro?" Supladang bungad ni Paula sa akin nang makita niya ako rito sa main dressing room.
I ignored her but noticed how she stared at the ring on my finger. Nakitaan konng inggit at inis ang mga mata niya.
"Nagpakasalan lang, napipi ka na?" Nang-uuyam na aniya. Ayaw talaga ako tantanan ng marites na ito ano.
"Call me, Miss Torres," hinubad ko sa harap niya ang coat na bigay ng tinatawag nilang asawa ko.
Pikon na umismid si Paula matapos sulyapan ang katawan ko. "Unless you are not really married to him," tumaas ang kilay niya.
"Seemingly, you sound intrigued of my marriage."
Umirap siya at iniwan na ako. Ang sarap niya talaga kausap 'no? Sinabi ko lang naman ang aking napuna. Tapos aalis na lang ng ganun? I shook my head.
I just hope she's not one of the women who are interested in that Ansel 'Babaero' Monterro. Because if that's the case, then her hatred towards me will burn deeper. And duh! Ayokong makipagalitan sa kanya dahil lang sa gagong Ansel na 'yon. No effin way! Ano siya, gold?!
"Be on the next fashion show, Iana. Huwag mo na naman akong pakabahin at pag-alalahin dahil lang sa hindi kita ma-contact!" Direk Joe widened his eyes on me.
"Yes, Direk. Sorry na. Hindi na mauulit."
Oh hell! Uuwi na sana ako pero naalala ko na wala pala akong kotse. Kinuha ni Dad kasi nagmamatigas ako. Paano na ako uuwi neto?
"Mrs. Monterro!" A reporter shouted when he spotted me.
Mahina akong napamura nang mapatingin ang mga tao sa akin. I just faked a smile. I've been practicing how to do a fake smile that looks genuine so it's easy for me to do it and make it actually seem believable.
Sa isip ko ay pinagmumura ko na ang apilyedo na 'yan. I am not his wife!
I muttered a low curse and aimed for the exit pero nahigit ko ang hininga ko nang mamataan si Ansel na papalapit sa akin. I ws about to leave him but his warning eyes told me the otherwise.
"Sabay na tayong umuwi," uminon siya sa alak niya.
"No thanks. I can go home by myself," I quickly dismissed him.
Nakitaan ko ang pagguhit ng kung anong gulat sa mga mata niya. Suddenly, the corner of his lips raised. What now?
"Home. Come to think of it, I never considered my house a home. But now that you've mentioned it.." tumatango siya. "You're quite right."
House?! Mansion 'yung bahay na sinasabi niya!
Grabe wala pa, humihinga lang siya at nagsasalita pero gusto ko na lang siyang itapon sa pit! Pinagtitinginan na kami ng mga tao. Cameras were focused on us. Some looked confused. Some looked amused. But many looked jealous.
Bago ko pa man siya masinghalan, may babaeng lumapit sa amin.
"Ansel!" She walked to him, touched him and kissed his cheek.
Nakitaan ko ang pag-awang ng bibig ni Ansel dahil don at ang mabilis na pagdako ng mga mata niya sa akin.
"I told you to contact me after that night! I gave you my number right?!" Malandi siyang humilik sa dibdib ni Ansel. "I waited but you never did."
Maraming mga nakatingin sa amin. And the news about my marriage with Ansel will be become hotter with what's happening now. Won't it be good? So people would know how manwhore this Monterro is! And I can use it as an excuse to divorce him!
"Give me one good reason why I should, Fiona," Ansel removed her hands on him.
"Because you were amazing that night! How you took me! Didn't you feel the connection between us?"
Napangiwi ako sa narinig. Lahat ng atensyon niya ay na kay Ansel. I looked at him. I felt disgusted. Ansel read my expression, shaking his head before facing the woman he fucked 'that night'.
Medyo malayo kami sa mga tao. I just hope they are not hearing this disgusting conversation.
"No, I didn't. And don't expect calls from me. We fucked, that was it," saad ni Ansel.
Fiona gasped. There it was... the pain in her eyes. "No.. no! You made me feel so right in your arms when we did it! It wouldn't be possible that you did not grow feelings for me!" Desperada na ata siya. Namamaos pa ang boses niya. Parang naiiyak na.
Tinignan siya ni Ansel at namulsa. May gana pa siyang uminom sa alak niya habang naiiyak na 'tong babae niya!
"No attachments. It was just a one night stand between us. Don't take it personally," kalmadong sagot niya.
"I can't believe you!" She snapped. "You like me! You were attracted to me that's why you... you made me feel so good!"
"Fiona, making you feel good in bed doesn't have to involve attachment or feelings. I already told you that," he chuckled emotionlessly.
"You left me after fucking me!" She hissed. "You made me feel so cheap!"
Humalakhak si Ansel. "I never do cuddles."
He looked at her ruthlessly. There was authority in his eyes. "I fuck and leave, Fiona. I already made that clear to you. And you agreed. So don't make it seem as if I'm the one at fault here because you developed feelings for me when I told you not to."
This sick bastard! He hurt her for sure. Nangingilait na 'yung babae niya at halatang sasabog na! I can't believe Ansel! Talagang sinasabuhay niya ang titulo niyang babaero!
"Why?!" Galit na si Fiona. "Is it because of this girl?!"
Nagulat ako nang ituro niya ako. Hala, bakit ako?! Wala naman akong ginagawa sa'yo girl! Nakatayo lang naman ako dito. Tahimik at napakaganda! Tapos idadamay ako?
Ansel did not say a word. Pinandilatan ko siya. It's so easy to dismiss her though and disagree with what she said! Pero hindi niya ginawa!
Don't tell me gusto niyang madamay ako rito sa issue nilang dalawa!
"Fiona, don't make a scene," tanging sabi ni Ansel sa kanya.
I suppressed a stressed groan and stepped closer to Ansel. Hinawakan ko ang palpusuhan niya at hinigit siya palabas. Nagpatianod siya ng walang sinasabi. Pagkarating kami sa parking ay tsaka ko siya binitawan.
"For pete's sake Mr. Monterro! The news about you tying the knot with me is all over the news! Don't you know how many reporters witnessed what just happened?!" Singhal ko sa kanya. "Ano na lang sasabihin nila?!"
"I thought you do not care."
"Damay ako! Of course I would care!" I bursted. "You could ruin my name! What would they think of me?! A wife who's being cheated on by his husband?! If that is the case, then better tell the public we are not in a relationship and that there's no marriage between me and you!"
He didn't talk. Ano, pipi na siya ngayon?! He has his eyes on me. Sinalubong ko ang bawat tingin niya kahit mabibigat ang mga ito.
Galit na galit ako at sinisiguro kong nakikita niya 'yon.
"Kung hindi mo mapigilan ang kati mo, better broadcast that I am just a close friend or an acquaintance," mariin kong sabi. "Sa papel lang naman tayo kasal. And they don't need to know it."
Umigting ang bagang niya ngunit hindi pa rin siya sumagot.
"You can go back to your usual routine. Pwede kang mambabae, kumantot at lumandi. At least, for the people, you are still a bachelor and not my husband. I can let you do whatever you want. And importante, hindi nila alam na kasal tayo kaya hindi nila masasabing isang akong babae na kayang ipagpalit ng asawa niya."
"Ayoko," Ansel disapproved. "Sa lahat ng sinabi mo, wala akong nagustuhan."
Gulat akong suminghap. "Are you kidding me?! This is for the benefit of the both of us! I can do whatever you want and you can do whatever you please to do! As long as we keep our marriage a secret, you are allowed to fuck around and I won't mind! Ang importante, hindi madudungisan ang pangalan ko at ang pamilya ko!"
"Keep you a secret, huh? Now why would I fucking do that?" Halos bumaon ang malalalim na tingin niya sa akin.
Binalot ng kaba ang puso ko nang dumilim ang mga mata niya.
"Why wouldn't you?" Matapang na tanong ko sa kanya pabalik. "Kasi mahal mo ako?" Panunuya ko matapos maalala ang sinabi niya dati. "You think I'll believe that?"
Hindi ko namalayan na may lumandas na palang luha sa mga mata ko. He ruined my peace. Okay naman ang buhay ko e. Kaso bigla na lang akong binenta sa kanya na para pambayad ng utang. Para akong walang kwenta kay Papa. How could he do this to me?
Pagod ko siyang tinignan. "You are not capable of loving, Ansel! With your reputation of being a heartbreaker, a playboy, and someone who leaves a girl crying after getting in their pants; you do not love me!"
Patuya siyang humalakhak. "Ikaw ba ako? Nararamdaman mo ba kung ano ang nararamdaman ko?"
Natahimik ako sa sinabi niya. His jaw clenched before he continued. "Huwag mo 'kong pangunahan. You don't know me."
"Both of us should tell the press that we are not married. Please," pumikit ako.
"Don't make me a liar," napamulsa siya.
Hirap akong napatingala at pinunasan ang mga luha ko. Ansel was just staring at me. I don't know what's running in his head. Napuno na ata ako. And a week of living with him possibly drained me.
"Ang selfish mo," wala sa sariling bulong ko.
Napa-angat lang ako ng tingin dahil may kung anong parang nabasag. Ansel threw his glass of alcohol.
"Fucking hell," he laughed dryly.
Tumingin siya sa akin. "If I do what you say, what's in it for me?"
I did not back down. I aggressively wiped my tears. "You keep your life together, including your women and everything you want to do. Hindi kita papakialaman."
"That's not enough for me, Iana. Give me more," Ansel said.
I swallowed hard. He's demanding for more. "Then what else do you want?"
Kinabahan agad ako sa maaari niyang isagot sa tanong ko nang makita ang pagseryoso ng mukha niya. His lips curved to a smirk but his eyes speaks danger. Parang gusto ko na lang bawiin ang tanong ko.
"Easy. You will still stay in my house. You don't get to entertain boys. Whether or not I'm around, you will not flirt with any guy. No one touches you or even dares to lay a finger on you," matalim niyang sabi. "You're still my wife.. in papers."
I inhaled sharply. "I won't be allowed while you can?" There was bitterness in my voice.
Ansel nodded, attentive of my actions. "But if you won't allow me to, I can arrange that-"
Pinutol ko kaagad siya. "Mambabae ka, wala akong pakialam. Basta klaruhin mo sa mga tao na walang tayo. Na hindi tayo kasal."
Umigting ang panga niya. His jaw moved aggressively before he boredly nodded.
"But the truth is, you're Mrs. Monterro."
I clenched my teeth after hearing that but I did not comment. I just felt a rush in my spine when Ansel took one step away from me.
"Whatever," pagsusungit ko.
"Keep that in mind, Iana," aniya at lalong sumeryoso ang mukha niya. "And don't entertain boys. Subukan mo. Hindi lang bali ng buto ang aabutin nila," he coldly said.
•••••
:)