As Daemon, Lucien and I stepped into the building that Daemon led us to, my initial judgement of the dodgy-looking place changed. It was clear that someone with quite a substantial amount of wealth owned this... establishment. It was also clearly well looked-after with the finest furniture and lamps in view from the entrance.
Everything was made from mahogany, weirwood or expensive metals. The front desk was a beautifully carved piece of weirwood, with a golden lamp sitting on it. Around the room were other golden lamps, as well as ones made of different colored stain glass. All of the different colours danced around the room and were almost entrancing.
Despite its extravagant decor, we had clearly stepped foot inside a brothel. There were a few half-naked women dancing, a group of men drinking while being entertained by one of the women, and the smell of sex in the air. It made me wonder what was going through Daemon's mind when he decided we should hide here.
Both Lucien and I gave Daemon a pointed look. He just smirked while looking around, seemingly unfazed by our reactions.
Lucien, on the other hand, kept his eyes on the ground. I could not tell if it was because he wanted to be respectful or if it was because he was uncomfortable. Possibly both.
"The city guards will not look for us here," Daemon reassured. "And we are free to share our status. This is owned by Littlefinger."
"Just the person I do not want knowing I am here," I muttered.
Before I could insist that we were not staying, a handsome young man with sharp features, blonde hair and bright blue eyes walked up to us. He smiled at the three of us, but his eyes lingered on Daemon for a few seconds longer than they did on Lucien and I. It was clear that they had met before.
Once the man's eyes had left Daemon, they came back to me. It was hard to deny the man's easy beauty and even I found it difficult to not momentarily be distracted by his beauty. However, I am not just any woman that has walked into a brothel. I am the head of House Stark. A house known for honour and whose members would not be expected in a brothel.
"You must be Lady Stark," the man said. "No need to worry about anyone finding out you are here. We cater to a number of people who need their presence kept secret." He paused for a second before introducing himself, "I am Olyvar, the person in charge of this brothel."
"At least we are calling it what it is," I responded, my voice coming out colder than I wanted it to.
"We are hiding from the city guards," Daemon confessed, drawing a concerned look from Lucien and a frustrated sigh from myself. "I was hoping I would be able to hide in private... With you. I have the money to cover the expense, of course. And for whatever Lucien and Lady Stark wish."
Did Daemon intend to bring us here the whole time? Or was it just an opportunity he was going to take advantage of whether Lucien and I were comfortable with it or not?
Either way, he was beginning to annoy me.
First, he convinces us to come out here. Then we get into a bar fight and get dragged out instead of just revealing ourselves to the city guards, which we could have done with the only consequence being us sent home and a few whispers he could squash himself. Then he drags us to a fucking brothel, of all places, and reveals who we are and why we are here in the first place.
Daemon turned to face Lucien and I and I could tell he knew I was not happy. I did not even have to look at Lucien to tell that he was annoyed with the situation as well. How could we not be? This all seemed to be a game to Daemon.
It reminded me of when we met when we were younger. Everything was fun and games and impulse to Daemon then. I was not unconvinced tonight was not the same.
"You two need to blow off some stress," Daemon told us, shrugging his shoulders as if he was brushing off the looks we were giving him. "There are people here who would be to both of your liking. That is, if you two are not ready to admit you want to fuck."
I did not miss the red tinge that spread across Lucien's cheeks. Instead, I chose to ignore it and glare directly at Daemon.
"You would do well to watch your tongue," I warned, feeling my anger surge for the second time tonight.
"Stop with your bullshit," Lucien dismissed. "We need to get back to the Red Keep. We would be safest there."
I never thought I would agree that the Red Keep is the safest possible place to be, but for once I did. It was a hell of a lot safer than the streets of Kings Landing while the city guard is looking for us. And anything is safer than a brothel owned by Littlefinger. He may have loved my mother, but I do not believe that love extends to me.
"See, the two of you are stressed!" Daemon exclaimed. "You both enjoyed the bar fight. Keep enjoying your night."
He shot Lucien and I a wink before walking away with Olyvar. I watched the two of them disappear further into the brothel and I could not help but feel frustrated. If Daemon wanted to fuck someone he should have just come by himself.
Lucien was still standing beside me and I could tell he was both annoyed and embarrassed. I did not know why he was embarrassed though. Clearly Daemon was wrong about us wanting to sleep with each other or we would have jumped on the chance.
We walked further into the brothel and took a seat at one of the tables. Neither of us said anything. I do not even think we wanted to speak to each other.
I could not deny how handsome Lucien is or the moments where I have felt like we were too close to each other. His golden eyes drew me in every once in a while. So did his genuine personality and his charming smile. He was strong and intelligent and arguably one of the best swordsmen in Westeros.
But I am not just any girl free to fall in love with a charming lordling. I am Lady Stark. I have a sister to find before it is too late and a family name to restore to honour.
And Lucien will be Lord Tyrell one day. He will be Lord of Highgarden and the Reach, as well as Warden of the North. Even if he felt anything for me, it would never be allowed to work.
"Looks like we will have to sit here until Daemon is done," I said, clearly still annoyed. "Who knows when that will be."
"There will be a scandal if another lord walks in and finds Lady Stark and the future Lord of Highgarden sitting together in a brothel," Lucien gently reminded. "It does not look good for either of us or for our houses. If we are to be stuck here waiting for Daemon, we should at least be out of view."
"Is that your way of getting me into a room to seduce me?" I asked, teasing him slightly. "I do agree, though. But it was your idea, so you can sort it. That, and I do not know how to sort it."
"Neither do I." I was surprised by this. "It might be a bit of a shock, but I have never met a woman and thought to bring her to a brothel to woo her."
I let out a small laugh and gestured for Lucien to go find someone to ask about a private room. I just hoped he could control his cock enough to decline any women who wished to join us. I just want to sit and relax as much as I can in this situation.
When Lucien returned, a gorgeous woman - who was fully clothed - was with him. As she led us to the room, she kept her attention fixed on Lucien. It was clear she enjoyed his looks and wanted to get some money out of him. I could not judge. Sex is the way she survives and fucking a handsome man would just be an added bonus.
The woman left the two of us as soon as she unlocked the door and I walked into the room. I think she could tell that Lucien had no interest in her. That surprised me, though. She was a beautiful woman that not a lot of men would pass up. Hell, not even I would pass her up if she were to join myself and a man in bed.
There were three chairs and a table in one corner, a long cushioned bench along the wall, and a bed in another corner of the room. It was a large bed that could comfortably fit many people and looked quite comfortable. I did not sit on it, however. I decided the chairs would be better.
Even the chairs were large and comfortable. It was clear that these could be used for a woman to ride a man. The thought made me slightly uncomfortable, but I pushed it aside.
"Have you ever been in a brothel?" Lucien asked me, taking me by surprise.
I studied him for a second, trying to figure out why he would bother asking me that. It was not hard to study him closely - both due to his looks and the fact that he was in the chair next to me. And it was not hard to find he was only asking so he could talk to me.
"Yes, but only because the person I lived with in Braavos frequented a few," I answered. "Have you?"
"Never."
I found that hard to believe. I know that Robb did not like brothels, and that Father strongly discouraged us from going to them. But I always thought that was to protect the honorable name of House Stark since Robert's Rebellion and Jon's birth threatened that idea.
"I have never been one to sleep with random women I do not know," Lucien revealed.
"But you have slept with someone?"
I knew I was prying now, but I did not care. I was curious.
"I have. She was a girl who worked in Highgarden. My father never would have approved, but I found she did not love me like she claimed before I could even ask for approval. She was sleeping with other men whilst saying I was the only one she loved and had ever slept with."
There was a sad smile on Lucien's face. It was clear that this girl had hurt him. I think he did not love her anymore, but I cannot begin to imagine how much hurt all of that must have caused him. Well, I can imagine it because the hurt is still clear on his face despite the fact that it must have been at least a year ago.
"Have you slept with someone?" Lucien asked, returning the question. "Or even loved someone?"
"I am sure you heard the rumours about myself and Viserys Targaryen," I said. "He was the first man I loved. It was in no way a good love. We were both angry and hurtful at the start. His anger never fully faded. He was not good for me, but I cannot deny that I loved him. It is his sword that I use and I have his cloak pin in my room."
"There were rumours you were with his child..."
The reminded was not one I wanted. Sometimes I was free of the burden of losing a child. I tried not to think about it, really. I would rather ponder Viserys' death than what happened to my body after.
I did not know whether or not I trusted Lucien enough to tell him the truth. There was no reason not to trust him, but it was hard for me to talk about and I did not know how he was going to react. I did not want his pity, but I was scared of potential anger if I told the truth.
I decided it was something I should talk about. It was not going to be easy, but for some reason I felt as if Lucien deserved the truth.
"Not for very long," I answered. "It died within me the night Viserys died. I do not like to talk about it, so perhaps we should change topic."
A heavy silence fell upon us as I quickly became lost in my thoughts.
My child would never have been safe. I do not lie to myself about that. Between the threat of Viserys' madness and the political threat it would pose to whoever sat on the Iron Throne, our child may not have even survived. And if it did, it would be on the run for the rest of its life and would never fully understand why.
The danger my child would have been in if born was the only thing to somewhat keep my sadness at bay. It was still my child. It was still the child of a man I loved at the time. It was still important to me, even though I never got to hold or name it.
"You have been through more than I could have imagined," Lucien told me, clearly intending his statement to be a compliment. "When you were dragged into the throne room of the Red Keep I never thought you would have been through so much. You were so full of fire. It is not something you see a lot in the South."
"Yes, well, the North is quite a different place," I said. "It is colder there. Women do not always have the option of sitting inside and sewing. It is not uncommon for women to know how to defend themselves either. And I was an exile. If I did not protect myself, then who would?"
Lucien nodded at my statement. I used the quiet to study him a little closer. His golden brown hair fell in curls down to his shoulder blades and his shoulders were strong and broad. He was well-built and handsome, yet a lot more tired than he used to be. I could tell everything he had been through lately often kept him up at night.
"You are not too bad yourself, you know?" I continued, complimenting Lucien back. "You are a lot smarter than I expected. A lot better of a fighter and a politician too. The handsome face does not hurt." That earned me a small laugh. "You seem tired and we may be here for a while. You should take the bed."
"You seem tired too," Lucien pointed out. "You sleep first."
All I did was shake my head. As much as I looked tired, I had gotten used to having restless sleep, if any at all. Some nights are worse than others when it comes to sleeping and I do not choose those nights.
It is hard to sleep when you see the deaths of your loved ones every time you close your eyes for too long. It is even harder when your dreams are vivid reminders of those deaths. These memories haunt me everywhere I go and are why I can rarely sleep well at night unless I am so tired I have no choice but to sleep.
When I looked up from the table, I found Lucien staring at me. He did not look away from me when I met his eyes, which was a surprise. It seemed that he was observing me the same way I had been observing him earlier, just more openly.
If I lived a different life, I would allow the fluttering feeling in my stomach to build up. But I do not live a different life. I am the head of House Stark, a political prize to the Lannisters and a former-exile. My focus must be on my family, my house and my honour. Not on the feelings of infatuation towards someone who would have been an ideal match if it were not for my past.
Lucien is the kind of man who would make a husband most girls would dream of. The issue is, I can never say that I dreamed of marrying. I knew I had to, but I wanted to travel and learn more than anything. I enjoyed meeting new people and expanding my knowledge on all the houses of Westeros. Even the smallest lord in the furthest region of Westeros was of interest to me.
I suppose being exiled was my time to travel, just not in the lands I wanted to travel. I learned a lot about other people and about myself. The only reason I resent the experience is because I lost so many people in my family along the way and may never see others like Jon and Uncle Benjen again. It would be different if my family was still alive.
"You know, we still do not know what exactly Daemon's plan is," Lucien said, reminding me of our promise in the tunnels within the Red Keep. "I do not understand why we would promise such a thing and then plan no further. Or why he would bring us to a brothel as if we are not potentially going to commit treason some day. He is my closest friend, but sometimes even I wonder..."
"Can we trust him?" I finished. "I do not know for certain. I do know he has grown up a lot since I last met him. And I know that if he wanted us both killed for treason he would have done it by now. But I do not know what he gets out of helping me get revenge. As for what his plan is, I suspect he wants one of us to be king or queen."
"If that is the case then he wants a queen. You are more qualified than I am."
I could not help but laugh at Lucien's naivety. If Daemon wants control of the person reigning the Seven Kingdoms then he will need a back up. It is entirely possible Lucien or I will die if it comes to a battle. And if both of us die, then who better to step up and lead our armies and unite them than our closest confidant?
Besides that, I am not qualified to rule the Winterfell household let alone the North or the Seven Kingdoms. The North may accept my rule and help me learn, but Southerners would never accept a Northern ruler. They would have me killed before I could even begin to grasp knowledge required to rule.
"What makes someone qualified to be ruler of a country?" I asked, hoping to spark an important conversation. "Does being raised to rule truly make a difference? Does being feared work? Or is love a better approach? Is it different country to country?"
Lucien paused to consider my question. I could tell it was something he had never really had to think about before. Why would he? He is the son of one of the wealthiest and most influential lords in Westeros. His position is secure.
"I think a ruler needs to be wise," he answered, his speech slow and cautious. "But the kind of wise where he puts his people first. He needs to be able to gain the love of the people, but the people also need to fear doing the wrong thing. I do not know, though. It is not something I have ever really thought about."
"See, my answer is different," I said. "I think a ruler of a whole country should know when to be selfish to hold onto power. I would agree that the people need to fear doing the wrong thing, but that the ruler should be respected by the lords and people who do the right thing. They need to be able to listen to others, but make their own decisions. And being honorable is a waste because the honorable decision is not always the right one. A ruler has to focus on stability foremost. A country cannot thrive without it."
Silence fell between us as Lucien continued to think. The look of focus on his face was endearing. He almost looked like a small child trying to answer the questions a maester had given them on numbers.
"A ruler has to be ruthless," a familiar voice chimed in, making me jump.
Of course it was Daemon. He was standing by the now-closed door with a smirk on his face.
"They have to be strong and willing to make hard decisions that they may detest themselves," he continued. "They have to be ready to face the hate of the people and the lords. They have to be able to fight and kill. They have to know what they are doing and listen to their advisers, but also understand that their advisers do not care for them. They have to be ready to completely re-seat the Small Council, potentially by killing all former members. But I think we also need someone who is unlike any of our other rulers."
Daemon's answer was colder than the one Lucien and I gave. He seemed to prefer violence and fear for securing a reign. It gave me a lot of insight into him. An insight that made me even more wary of the prince.
A harsh silence fell between the three of us. Whereas I was unsettled, Lucien seemed to be considering Daemon's answer. I suppose he would, seeing how this was never something he had given thought to before. But still... I could not help but shake my feeling of unease at Daemon's words.
He could mean that the harshness is that of former rulers who have held onto rule comfortably, and that the ruler should be unlike those. Or he could mean the ruler unlike the others should be like that and more. I could not tell and the more I considered it the more concerned I became because he wanted one of us to be like that.
"You do not strike me as a murderer, but you strike me as a ruler," Daemon told me. "I do not think you will rule with hate or fear, but I think you could. No matter how I think a ruler should rule, you are the one we need."
"I agree. Now we just have to find you a place of power," Lucien agreed.
Thinking back to my conversation with Tywin Lannister, I spoke:
"I think I know just the starting place."