⠀⠀While Eric severely wounded Kevin's pride by beating him at air hockey ("Justin Trudeau, I failed you!" Kevin had wailed, falling onto his knees upon seeing the final score of one to ten as Eric cackled maniacally), Kevin had been more relaxed and happy than he ever had in these past few days. Ignoring and avoiding Jacob was exhausting, especially since Jacob was going out of his way to talk to him, so Kevin was nothing but thankful for the distraction Eric provided.
⠀⠀It's precisely why he was so reluctant to part with Eric as they walked to the bus station where they would go their separate ways. The two of them had been laughing and talking about random stuff as they walked, but Kevin was sure Eric had noticed the way Kevin was clinging onto him. Hopefully, Eric would ask about it and perhaps invite him over to his house instead. After all, Kevin didn't really feel like coming home tonight, especially after Stella had texted him about Jacob's sudden arrival at their front door.
⠀⠀Jacob. Just thinking about that guy made Kevin's head throb. He caused Kevin so many confusing emotions, and Kevin didn't know what to make of any of them. Cursing under his breath, Kevin scowled at the image of Jacob's pretty smile. Screw him. He was gonna drop the band if it meant avoiding Jacob for good, his love for performing be damned.
⠀⠀Surely enough, Eric tapped Kevin's shoulder and asked curiously, "You okay?" Kevin snapped out of his thoughts to look at Eric's amused smile and rubbed his nape.
⠀⠀"Uh, kinda?"
⠀⠀Eric pouted and crossed his arms. "I did not spend so much money on that arcade for you to only be kinda okay," he grouched petulantly. The childish front dropped immediately as Kevin chuckled, then Eric asked gently, "Seriously, is everything okay, though?"
⠀⠀The younger boy might've been rambunctious and jock-like than he, but Eric was intelligent down to his core. Kevin sighed. "It's just. . . I can't get my mind off of Jacob. And Stella told me he came over to my place and I don't wanna go home in case he's still there," he explained quietly.
⠀⠀Eric hummed in recognition, nodding. "Yeah, I get it. But it's," he looked at his phone screen briefly, "seven now. I'm sure he's gone now. There's no way he was over at your place three hours after school let out. You'll be okay, hyung," Eric assured with a smile.
⠀⠀"But—"
⠀⠀"Kevin," Eric swiftly interrupted, stopping in his path and gripping Kevin by the shoulders. "You'll be good. And if he is there, then you can call me, okay?" He smiled, warming Kevin to his core. Eric was such a nice guy.
⠀⠀Kevin wanted to argue and plead his case about why he shouldn't have to go home, but he just sighed. Eric was right; he couldn't have his feelings about Jacob control his life. "Sounds like a plan, Eric."
⠀⠀They arrived at the bus station, where they hugged for a few moments longer than normal and parted reluctantly. Eric had flashed him a worried but bright grin before stepping into his bus, which Kevin returned with a small laugh.
⠀⠀During the short ride home, Kevin's mind milled about as his favorite playlist blared in his ears. His eyes were closed, and he probably could've taken a quick nap if he got his mind to quiet down a bit, but no matter what Kevin forced himself to think about, it always ended up back at that night at Jacob's house. And it sucked. Just as Kevin was getting comfortable with Jacob again, he learned about why Jacob had actually left after years of taunting.
⠀⠀He had cried for days after Jacob departed, thinking it was because of their fight and him, most importantly, antagonizing both him and Jacob for years after. Learning what had actually happened made Kevin feel dumb, like he had wasted all that time for nothing, and it only built resentment for Jacob. Jacob had never even made an effort to clear up the misunderstanding—okay, yeah, Kevin had blocked him on all forms of communication, but Jacob still should have found a way—and it made Kevin wonder if. . . if Jacob still believed any part of what he had said. Why wouldn't Jacob, in the four years between their reconnection, even try to clear up his mistake or apologize?
⠀⠀Kevin clenched his teeth. He didn't know how he felt about Jacob anymore, but he was sure that he didn't want to see that guy any time soon.
⠀⠀Kevin arrived home and tiredly kicked off his shoes after entering, wanting nothing more than to crash on the couch and sleep. Just thinking about Jacob was exhausting, and he didn't have it in him to even do his homework, which his scholarly side scolded him for. He greeted his mom in the kitchen with a tired smile as she set out dinner, then turned to the living room to pass out when he was suddenly grabbed by the wrist and pulled off balance.
⠀⠀Lo and behold, it was none other than Stella. But Kevin could hardly pick up his feet and he was just so exhausted, so he wasn't amused at all by the sudden pushiness of his elder sister. "What is it with you and dragging me places?!" Kevin complained as Stella pulled him to the guest room she stayed in. "I can walk by myself!"
⠀⠀"Just to remind you that I'm older than you," was her simple, matter-of-the-fact reply.
⠀⠀"By two years, get over it!"
⠀⠀Stella closed the door behind him and finally let go of his wrist, which Kevin gingerly cradled with a grimace. "You're fine, Kevin. Don't be a wimp," she scoffed as she sat down on the edge of her bed and patted the spot next to her for him to sit. Kevin begrudgingly took his seat, but shot a small glare at his sister anyways. So bossy.
⠀⠀"What do you what?" he grumped, still annoyed that Stella had snatched him away from his well-deserved nap. It was hard being a teenager, what could he say?
⠀⠀"I talked to Jacob—" came out of Stella's mouth, and it was all it took for Kevin to stand up and shake his head.
⠀⠀"Nope, I am not dealing with this right now," Kevin said breezily, moving to leave and take his rightful place on the couch, but Stella had rushed in front of him to physically block the way before he could even blink. He did so in confusion, and within a few movements of trying to dodge past her, Kevin groaned. "Mom! Stella's being mean to me!" he complained loudly towards the door.
⠀⠀Kevin already knew he was going to lose when his mother started laughing, glaring at his sister as she also yelled, "No, I'm not! Kevin's just being a baby!" Being the younger sibling had its perks, of course, but winning arguments like this was not one of them.
⠀⠀"Don't hurt each other! And come eat dinner after you're both done!" their mother called to them, though Kevin could hear the smile in her voice. Was no one on his side nowadays?
⠀⠀"Kev, go sit back down so we can talk," Stella ordered as she closed the door. Huffily, Kevin crossed his arms and frowned.
⠀⠀"What if I don't wanna?"
⠀⠀He had been acting playful, after all, but a shiver shot up his spine as Stella eyed him with a powerful and demanding glare. Shit, he might've been taller than his sister, but there was something so terrifyingly intimidating in her that truly solidified her position as the top dog/older sibling. Therefore, Kevin, grumbling as he did so with his petulant posture, retook his seat on the edge of her bed.
⠀⠀"I don't wanna talk about Jacob," he said flatly.
⠀⠀Usually, just the mention of Jacob's name would be enough to deter his sister of all people, but it shocked him to see that that wasn't the case this time as she shook her head. Okay, now he was suspicious. What exactly had Jacob done to her? Gosh, she hated him more than he did! Narrowing his eyes in suspicion, "What's up with you, sis?"
⠀⠀Stella took a deep sigh, then said, "Well, I talked to Jacob, right?" She didn't even stop to give him a chance to snarkily reply, rushing onto, "and he has major issues he wants to clear up with you. Like, I mean, major. And I genuinely think it's in both of you guys' best interest to talk that shit out."
⠀⠀Kevin raised a brow, surprised. One could argue that his sister hated the Baes more than he did after the incident. "Stella, you of all people should not be vouching for him," he said with a frown.
⠀⠀"I know," Stella sighed, "but. . . I don't know, Jacob and I talked for what felt like forever, and he's at least genuine in the fact that he wants to apologize for everything. And he genuinely freaked out when I told him what happened after he left."
⠀⠀Kevin repressed the urge to snort, doubt crawling up his chest. "I mean I guess, but if he really wanted to apologize, he would've done it before I saw him in Korea," he argued, drawing his knees to his chest. The thought had been nagging at him since the bus, so call him petty for not readily believing that Jacob wanted to apologize for the whole thing. "I don't care if he apologizes or not. I'm not gonna talk to him anymore anyways," he huffed into his knees, making his words came out muffled.
⠀⠀"You know, you do that when you're upset. The legs-to-the-chest thing," Stella pointed out knowingly, chuckling a bit as Kevin immediately dropped his legs to the floor with a small, petulant glare. "I'm just saying," she added, flopping back onto her bed, folding her arms behind her head, "I'm, like, a hundred percent sure that you're sad about the whole thing like he is. You still like him, and you want to make up with you. I just know, Kev."
⠀⠀"Firstly, I don't like him anymore. That day you came was just a fluke and I was caught up in a shitstorm of emotions," Kevin grumbled, trying his best to not curl into a ball again and bring his legs to his chest. "Second, I don't care if he apologizes now, not four years after I needed it. And I remember you berating me for liking Jacob anyways; you of all people should be happy that I'm not gonna talk to him anymore," he said sourly, ignoring the thumping in his chest. He didn't miss talking to Jacob, he did not.
⠀⠀
⠀⠀"Okay, yeah, I said that," Stella conceded, "but you know I wouldn't go back on something like that if I wasn't convinced that I was wrong. My ego is way too big for that."
⠀⠀"God, I know." Kevin winced, but laughed a bit when Stella kicked him in the side for the remark.
⠀⠀"But I really, genuinely and truthfully, think it's the best for you to, at the very least, talk to Jacob about it. I'm not saying you have to forgive him, because I know you went through some tough stuff because of him, and I'll support you no matter what you say. But I think I know what you want to do." Kevin didn't even have to look at Stella to know that she was closing her eyes in that know-it-all, older sister way with that satisfied smile on her face, convinced that she was absolutely correct. He wanted nothing more at that moment to tell her she was wrong, maybe punch her in the arm, and run in typical younger brother fashion, but. . . did she have a point? Was it worth talking the situation out with Jacob, who caused him so much grief?
⠀⠀He would have never admitted this to his sister of all people, but Kevin missed hearing Jacob's voice after being acquainted with it again after so many years. There was something about the gentleness of Jacob's voice, the soft and sweet aspects of it that had never ceased to tug at Kevin's heart. When he was singing, all of those qualities multiplied by a tenfold. And his kindness. . . god, Kevin might have resented Jacob for the past four years, but he understood well why everyone Jacob came in contact with was infatuated. Jacob's personality itself was like his voice as well. Something so sweet and gentle, almost to a fault. Kevin had only seen Jacob get angry a few times—mostly during their first meeting in the band room which was admittedly prompted by Kevin—and for fuck's sake, he kind of missed that part of Jacob too. Did he miss everything about Jacob? He pondered this as images of the boy popped into his head, but he soon buried his red face into his hands, groaning. Kevin had a massive headache now. God, he couldn't even make sense of his own feelings anymore.
⠀⠀"Stel?"
⠀⠀"Yeah?" Stella had stood up by now, standing by her closet as she leafed through the clothes within.
⠀⠀"What exactly did Jacob tell you to convince you of this?" Kevin asked, suddenly tired. No matter his feelings, he still wasn't terribly anxious to talk to Jacob. Stella turned to look at him, fixing him with an odd look as if she was thinking of something else. Then, she simply smiled and shrugged.
⠀⠀"Just call him. He'd be happy to explain everything," she said cryptically. She reached into her closet, pulling a dress out of it and tossing it onto the bed. "Now, shoo! I have to pick a cute outfit for the airport tomorrow," she admonished lightly, humming a quiet song.
⠀⠀Kevin rolled his eyes, turning to leave but pausing to stick his tongue out at his sister. "Later, loser," he quipped as he walked out the door.
⠀⠀"Takes one to know one!" Stella called out as he departed.
⠀⠀Kevin sat down on the foot of his bed, coughing a bit as he pulled out his phone and stared at the screen. Did he want to do this? There was a part of him that was extremely adamant about talking to Jacob again, another about avoiding the guy entirely. And if he still had feelings for Jacob, even after all of this time and what has happened. . . that'd be a great, sick joke for Kevin as well, doing nothing but making everything complicated.
⠀⠀"It's just for the band," Kevin told himself, gripping his phone hard. "I've invested too much time and energy into this performance to just give it up because Jacob Bae is a massive dick." With this in mind, Kevin pressed Jacob's contact info and prayed to God that everything would go the way it was supposed to.
— — —
YEAHHHH I KNOW, ITS LIKE FOUR MONTHS OVERDUE
here's my excuse: school is a little bitch but i'm tryna make it MY BITCH and it's not working exactly the way i want it to + i'm taking 4 college level classes so i haven't exactly had the time to pop out chapters,,, remember how i said i was busy in july? i definitely have NOT been getting any less busy
but fr, i deeply apologize for making y'all wait so long. that's not cool of me to do, and i'm sorry. i'm also sorry for the subpar chapter but we're almost done!! almost at the end! just a couple more chapters w the talent show only days away!!
pls leave a BUNCH of comments so i can actually have the motivation to write another one of these suckers at a quicker rate and i hope you enjoyed!! and if you don't, then i'll see you in another five months when i update again!!
peace,
- angie
note: this might have some grammatical errors/weird spellchecks,,, it's 1:30AM, let me do my thing ok gn
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