This story contains:
1. Grethan bromance, not romance
2. Mild-swearing at times
3. Cuteness galore and soft themes
4. The Dolan Twins (duh)
5. Nothing that will make you cry
ONE: E-Tee
Prompt: Ethan likes to act like a kid sometimes. Grayson goes along with it.
Ethan had a secret.
It wasn't like he was embarrassed by it.
Okay, he was, if not by a little.
God, he'd die if anyone found out.
Lisa and Sean Dolan were like shadows against their house, their lives. There was a consistency in their work. Lisa was a Philosophy instructor at the local college and was working on her P.H.D from Rowan University online. Most nights she was either in her study grading endless piles of papers, planning her lessons, corresponding with students via email, or working on her thesis.
Sean was a prominent business man in the community. He was constantly in meetings, in a consistent rush of clients and projects and deals. Most weekends he wasn't even home but in the city doing whatever needed to get done.
It wasn't like they were bad parents, they just weren't there.
Ethan and Grayson Dolan had to practically raise themselves. They had to put on the roles of grownups ever since they were pre-teens. Grayson cooked mostly- lasagna, creative little dishes he saw on the Food Channel, and anything a picky Ethan would eat-and Ethan would clean everything up, keep house, and make sure all the clothes were washed and folded in their proper places.
Order was an important thing for him.
When Grayson would mess up their room- throwing his sweatshirt onto the floor, leaving his can of empty Coke on the side table- Ethan would have to hold himself back from yelling at him. He didn't like fighting with his twin so if he could avoid it, he would. But things being in order was extremely important. If they weren't, bad things would happen.
For example, Grayson would get injured in football. Sean would get into a car accident on the interstate or Lisa would miss her very important meeting due to construction on the road.
They had different interests. Grayson was more interested in sports, while Ethan would rather sit in their shared room and read Wordsworth or some theory on time and relativity. He was labeled from an early age by his peers as the "sensitive, smart one" and Grayson was the "tough, sporty one." Labels were tough.
After all labels were for products, not people.
Ethan was extremely intelligent and even though Grayson would never admit that it wasn't like he hadn't been jealous of him before, especially when he got a problem right and the teacher would turn to him and ask, "Does that seem correct, Mr. Dolan?"
Like he knew what the hell Ethan was talking about. Who did, really? It was going passed most of the kids in the class, including himself.
And he'd smile, strained, and say, "Yes, ma'ma," and pray to God she didn't ask him to explain it as well.
Ethan's brain seemed to be on a constant rut, but he never explained that to his twin, though. He didn't need to.
Grayson knew.
It was like a million things were going on at once-Why was that man looking at them? Did he get that assignment in? What did Thoreau mean when he said that one line in Civil Disobedience? Had he eaten. Had Grayson eaten today. What time was it? What was Gray saying? How long had he been talking to him, and of what was he talking about, for that matter-and that led to panic attacks. He didn't like disorder.
Things had to be done a certain way and a certain amount of times.
Twenty-two times did he need to turn off the light switch in their room, thirty if it was a Thursday, and he had to close the front door three times when they got home from school. Close, open, close, open, wait twenty second, and close it again. If it was snowing, seven times.
To say that acting like a child relieved his stress would be the understatement of the year. It was like he was drowning in thoughts, ideas, orders, and patterns, and when he was a kid, when he was E-Tee as Grayson affectionately called him, all of that went away. He didn't need to think about how many times he had to turn off and on their bedroom light because Grayson would do that. He didn't need to worry if he locked the front door because Gray would do that.
They were fourteen when Ethan had suddenly, well, turned.
He had asked Grayson, in quite a serious tone, to read him a bed time story and then to tuck him into bed. At first, Grayson didn't know how to react. Was he screwing with him?
"What?" Grayson had asked, looking up at him from his video game. Ethan was standing there, looking down at him.
"Gwaysun," he had said, and leaned over the couch slightly, "rwead me a bedtime story, pwease."
He blinked at him, and then turned to his game, blinking. Then he looked back up at his brother.
"Do you have a fetish or something?" Grayson had asked when he realized what his twin was doing. He sounded like he was joking.
No, that wasn't it. Not at all. The question was light-hearted enough but Ethan had turned away, hurt. Did Grayson think he was a freak or something?
Gray saw the look on his face and put down his game controller, "I'm sorry."
Ethan sniffled, and his face fell. He got up from the couch.
"OK, let's read a bedtime story."
Grayson led them to their bedroom and Ethan stood there, head cocked slightly to the side, and watched as he pulled out the tub of their childhood things from under the bed. There were stuffed animals, toys, blankets, and a stack of books at the bottom of the tub. He pulled back a couple of blue blankets to reveal them and turned to his twin.
"Which one?" He asked, and Grayson understood when he pointed to one of the colorful books in the stack.
He really did.
And he was okay with it. It wasn't weird to him. If Ethan wanted to act like a little kid, then he was more than happy to play big brother, to play protector.
"Okie dokie, E-Tee," he said, and pulled it out. He took Ethan gently by the arm and led him to his bed. Ethan slipped under the thick dark green comforter and Gray pulled the blanket back, sliding in beside him. Ethan curled into his side and laid his head on his wide shoulder as Grayson opened the book.
"I warm now," he said, and Grayson's lips turned upwards slightly as he flipped to the first page.
"There was once a little rabbit named-" he began, and Ethan sighed in content.
Being Dyslexic, Grayson had once found himself hardly reading a paragraph straight. Ethan had helped him forever with that it seemed. He remembered when they were young, eight in fact, and Ethan seemed to be practically soaking in books like Harry Potter when he was still stuck on Goodnight Moon.
Ethan would never make him feel that way, though. He never made him feel dumb, or slow, or not worthy enough. If everything else made Grayson internally self-conscious-Lisa going over her lesson plans playfully with them and Ethan seeming to retain a good amount of information when he didn't, Sean making some off-handed remark that if he didn't do well in school he sure as hell would do great in professional football with his large build and near perfect hand-eye coordination-Ethan made him feel as though he could do anything if he just put his mind to it.
He wasn't just a string of muscle to be used for someone else's gratification. He could be a brain, too.
"I failed, E. Shit, I'm a dumbass."
"No, you're not. Saying that makes you sound like a dumbass. You did better than last time, right?"
"You got this, G," he'd say with a smile as he flashed vocab words in front of his face. Gray would look at his twin and smile. He had a sure look of determination in his eyes, as though he wasn't going to get up until Grayson knew the word forwards and backwards. And after a while, words did start to make sense. P's didn't look like D's anymore and groups of words weren't getting mixed up as bad.
If Ethan ever felt like he was getting too stressed out he would become E-Tee.
"Gwaysun," he'd say and his twin instantly knew when Ethan was on vacation and E-Tee had come out to play. He'd never get mad if Ethan started acting out at the most random of times-when he was helping him with his homework, when they were play wresting in their backyard in the fall leaves, when Ethan was reading one of his books aloud-and he never told their parents. It wasn't any of their business, anyway. If they wanted it to be their business, they needed to stay around for more than five minutes at a time, didn't they?
Grayson started getting little stuffed animals at CVS during check out for Ethan. E-Tee seemed to really like stuffed animals and coloring books, even though he had a hard time coloring within the lines.
He felt a bit awkward holding up a stuffed raccoon, big eyes shining brightly under the store lights, as he stood in line.
"It's for my, uh, girlfriend," he had stuttered out when an old lady looked back at him. She gave him a kind smile and he turned away.
"I luve it," Ethan had said when he got home, holding the furry stuffed animal to his chest and rocking side to side, "And I luve you too," he said to his brother. Grayson had grinned and reached out to hug him. He backed up with a mischievously stubborn look in his eyes and ran.
"No huggies!" Ethan called out and Grayson could tell that he was going to go hide from him.
"E-Tee, get back here! I have to take off the tag!"
Lisa and Sean would be gone all of Saturday. Sean was always gone to the city for some reason or another, and Lisa had an academic meeting. On Friday night they said goodbye to their boys over dinner since they knew they had to get up very early, earlier than their two sixteen-year-olds would get up.
Lisa was sipping a small glass of wine, swishing the liquid in her glass, and tilted it back, taking a swig. Grayson had an ice pack pressed up to his shoulder and a new cheek bruise to boot.
"Are you two doing much tomorrow?" Their father had asked, and Grayson smiled lightly. That depended on if Ethan wanted to be Ethan tomorrow.
"We're probably going to do homework. Maybe watch a movie," he said, and Ethan nodded next to him, bringing up at bit of lasagna to his mouth, taking a bite.
Sean nodded to his two sons and then turned to wife and started talking about one of his deals. She took another swig of her wine, staining her lips a light purple with the liquid.
It was Saturday morning when Grayson woke up to Ethan sitting on the edge of his bed. The sunlight was streaming through their window, letting in the rich yellow light of a new sun. He had Mr. Rabbie, his raccoon, in his hands bouncing him up and down and talking to him.
"We are going to have lots of fun today, Rabbie. Gwaysun is going to take us to the park."
When he made a slight movement, Ethan's eyes turned to him and then to the stuffed animal again, saying, "Oh, no, we woke him up!" He scolded the wide-eyed creature, and turned to Grayson shyly, afraid he was going to get in trouble.
He groaned and rubbed his eyes. He smiled when he was met by Ethan's wide-eyed gaze. Sitting up slightly, he stretched.
"Hey," he said, and looked up at his brother who was blinking. Once, twice.
"Gwaysun, you awake now," he said, and gave him a toothy grin. He leaned down, wrapping his arms around his neck. He felt Mr. Rabbie on the side of his head.
"Hey, E-Tee," he said, and patted his back. Ethan released him and frowned, looking down, "I'm hungwy."
Grayson smiled and said, "It's time for breakfast, I guess."
Ethan hummed, bringing his raccoon up to his chest and hugging it tightly.
"I want bath first."
Grayson nodded and got up as Ethan blinked at him.
He went to get him a change of clothes, bending over to slide the box out from under his bed, grabbing a pair of warm socks.
"I want the gween shirt," he said and Grayson looked up at him as he pulled out a pair of pajama bottoms, "pwease. I want Duckie too."
Grayson smiled and did so. He went to run the bath water.
"I want Rabbie."
"You can't have Mr. Rabbie in the bath," Grayson said sternly as Ethan had reached for him on the counter after he was in the bath. He couldn't reach him and was going to go and get him.
"But, Gwaysun-" he started sniffling as Grayson made him sit back down in the water, bringing Duckie out from the pile of clothes on the counter.
"Duckie!" He cried out in happiness, completely forgetting about Mr. Rabbie and Grayson handed him the little plastic yellow duck.
"Gwaysun," he said, sniffling, patting into the kitchen. He had taken his bath and his black hair was dripping wet. The kitchen smelled richly of pancake batter.
Grayson was at the stove making pancakes, flipping each one over slowly, watching as the batter spread outwards. The sunlight drifted through the wide window, gracing the side of his face and his hair, bringing out his highlights. He smiled when he heard his name.
"Hey, E-Tee," he said, turning towards Ethan, watching as he rubbed his eyes. He looked upset, red faced.
"Are you okay?" He asked and sat down the spoon.
Ethan shook his head, looking up at his brother, "No, I hurted," he said, and showed him his finger. It was still bleeding lightly, and Grayson's eyes widened, and he went to him, placing his hand under his.
He had touched Lisa's purple razor on the bathtub's rim, and it had been mean to him and bit him. He had watched the blood stream out and drip into the bubbles of the bathwater.
"It's okay," Grayson said as Ethan started to cry.
"It hurted," he said, and Grayson was turning off the stove, placing the pan on the back burner, and grabbing him gently, leading him to the bathroom. He sat him on the closed toilet seat.
"I want Rabbie!" He cried out and Grayson quickly went to the counter and retrieved the raccoon, placing it in Ethan's outstretched hands. He took it and shoved it against his neck, rocking side to side.
Grayson quickly pulled down the first aid kit.
"OK, E-Tee, let me see it."
Ethan did so, clutching the stuffed animal in one hand and brought his hand out for his inspection.
"Am I dying?" He sniffled, and Grayson held back a choke of laughter.
"No, you're going to be okay," he said, pulling out antiseptic and a band-aid.
"That's because you take care of me," he said, and was putting the tip of his thumb to his mouth.
"Yeah," Grayson said, and was wrapping his finger, "You bet I do."
He looked up at his brother who had his eyes closed, humming lightly.
He made Ethan a couple of small pancakes with a bit of whipped cream just as he liked it.
"Thank yowu," he said and shoved a large bit of pancake into his mouth.
"Slow down. You'll choke," Grayson said, and smiled when Ethan did so. He was sitting by him and Mr. Rabbie was between them, glass eyes staring out. He had a bit of whipped cream at the tip of his nose, and Grayson had grabbed a napkin to wipe it off.
"This is yummy," he hummed at him, taking another bite. Grayson cut a bite and brought it to his own mouth, smiling at his brother.
It was noon and Ethan was coloring a lion in one of the safari centered coloring books Grayson had bought him. He was mumbling a song lightly, belly down on the living room floor, and glanced up at Grayson who was sitting on the couch watching some T.V. show. He threw down his blue crayon and brought the coloring book up, getting up from his spot on the floor.
"Do you like it, Gwaysun?" He said and was moving to sit by him. He shoved it in his face.
Blinking, Grayson took the coloring book in his hands.
"Yeah, that look great," he said with a smile as Ethan brightened up and gave it back to him.
Ethan nodded, and said, "I think it's real pwetty too."
He dropped the book, and then looked at the T.V., then to Grayson again.
"What time is it?" He asked, and he turned to him, pulling his phone out of his jean pocket and checking the time, "12:01."
"Spongebob time!" He suddenly yelled out and Grayson started laughing as he was reaching over him to get the remote control from the couch's wide arm. He snatched the remote and started hitting random buttons.
"I got it," he said, and took it from his hands.
"Spongebob," he said.
"I know, E-Tee."
He flipped it onto the right station and Ethan's eyes went bright as he grinned. He rested his head onto his shoulder as the opening credits played. Grayson smiled as they watched the bright cartoon.
"He's funny," Ethan would say and yawn, rubbing his eyes after a while. Grayson looked down at him.
"It looks like it's nap time, bud."
He reached down and picked him up, taking him to bed as he closed his eyes, curling into his chest.
A little past three Grayson gave Ethan a fruit snack and he asked, "Can me and Rabbie go to the park? I want to go on the swings."
"Not today, E-Tee," he had said as he was cooking supper. He was making E-Tee's favorite: roast beef and mashed potatoes. He moved past him to take out the hot rolls from the oven with red oven gloves on his hands.
"But Gwaysun," he started, lips trembling and clutching the raccoon to his chest.
He stirred in the gravy, saying, "I'm making dinner. It's your favorite."
Ethan slammed his foot against the ground and let out a huff of frustration. Grayson looked at him as he proceeded to let out a sharp yelp and a glare. He was crossing his arms over his chest, looking particularly stubborn.
Grayson set the wooden spoon down.
"Do you want to go into time out?" Grayson asked sternly, and Ethan shook his head, frowning.
"I sorry," he said and then brought Mr. Rabbie to his chest again, rocking slightly. Grayson's eyes softened and he said, "It's okay. Go and wash your hands, okay? The food's ready."
He smiled and Ethan returned it, saying, "Okay, Gwaysun."
It was night time. The sky was a blanket of black as Ethan walked into the living room with a blue blanket wrapped over his shoulders. He was kind of cold and wanted Grayson with him.
"Gwaysun, read me a story, pwease," he said, patting into the living room, bringing him his book. He had it pressed to his chest and Grayson looked up. He had been watching a Netflix movie that was too scary for E-Tee. He had put him to bed but it seemed like he wasn't ready to go to sleep quite yet. Grayson put the movie on pause and then decided that he needed to go to bed himself and shut it off completely.
"Sure," he said, looking up and smiling at his twin. He got up, pulling his own blanket off.
"Piggyback!" Ethan yelled out when Grayson got close and was suddenly jumping on his back, Grayson's hands under his thighs to support him, as he threw his arms around his neck, the book's spine against his shoulder.
"Weeee!" He cried out as Grayson ran to their bedroom.
"What's that word?" Ethan asked, blinking his eyes up to his face. Grayson was lying down under the covers, Ethan curled to his side on his bed.
"Bear," he said, and Ethan repeated the word.
"Brown bear?" Ethan asked, resting his head on his shoulder as he flipped the book. Grayson held it out to rest on his belly, and Ethan's fingers went to a picture of a smiling bear with a baby bear beside it. He traced it with his finger.
"No, black bear."
"Oh," said Ethan, and nuzzled his shoulder some more.
"That's funny," Ethan said, tracing the picture, "He real funny, Gwaysun."
"Yeah, he is," he responded, and Ethan let out a little laugh.
"I like his bawloon," he said, and scratched at the paper. Grayson touched his hand and said, "Don't scratch that."
Ethan's hand stilled and he moved it back, looking up at Grayson who continued to read. Was he upset with him?
Grayson was still reading. He started to sniffle, and he stopped mid-sentence to look down at him in confusion.
"Gwaysun," he said, and started crying. He couldn't help himself. It was like a flood gate had been opened.
"What's wrong," Grayson asked, concerned.
"Don't be mad at me!" He cried out, and balled his hands into fists, rubbing his eyes.
"I'm not," Grayson said, looking down at him, and placing the book to the side. Ethan was moving up, rubbing his eyes and hiccuping, and Grayson moved down and brought his arms around him and pulled him gently back down so he couldn't move.
"I'm not mad at you, E-Tee," he said, and Ethan leaned into his touch and let his head go to his shoulder again. He let out a hiccup.
"Shhhh," Grayson said, rubbing his back.
Ethan stilled and rubbed his eyes as Grayson said, "I would never get mad at you, E-Tee."
He let himself feel protected and safe, closing his eyes. After a few moments, he opened his eyes again, looking at the white wall and his bed on the other side of the room. He sniffed and took his sleeve up to wipe off any tears from his cheeks.
"Thanks, Grayson."
There it was.
There was Ethan.
Grayson smiled at his twin as he reached to turn off the side lamp. He could feel him getting comfortable beside him. He clicked off the light as he slid his head onto the side pillow.
"Shut up," he said playfully, "freak."
He could feel Ethan kick him under the covers and go still again.
They fell asleep as a light rain began to fall outside their dark window.
Sorry it's so long I got carried away lmao
3913 words