"Matt," he's looking at Alicia. I pick up her phone. "Matt." i say again. He's not paying attention. And now Shawn's at my side. "Matt!" I say, louder. He finally looks at me.
"What, Autumn? What could you possibly need?" I show him the picture and he just sighs and shakes his head.
"How did she get it?" I ask him. He shakes his head again. "How. Did. She. Get. It." i say through gritted teeth.
Matt closes his teeth together. "Think about it, Autumn. Think. About. It." I can see Shawn disappearing from my vision. "Who is the only person who has that picture?" And then i realize what he means. Shawn.
*Autumns POV*
Shawn looks down at me from by my side as i look up at him. "Autumn, i can expla-"
"Explain what, Shawn? How you exposed me and Matt to his girlfriend? There's not a right explanation for that." I drop the phone and begin to walk away, leaving Matt attempting to comfort a now-awake Alicia on the floor.
I hear Shawn start following me. "Please, Autumn. Just hear me out."
I stop, turn around, and cross my arms in front of me. He just looks at me. "Well?" i ask.
He looks confused, "Well what?"
I scoff, "Well you have one minute to explain yourself and make up however many excuses possible, so go for it."
Shawn just stands there. He looks down at his feet, twiddles his thumbs. He looks up again, but not at me, behind me. I wish he'd say something. The crowd is receding but there's still some people waiting to see what he's gonna say. And then he says it, "I can't tell you here."
Tears gather in my eyes, "Yeah, best friends. What happened to that?" I turn around before i break in front of everybody. And there, right before my eyes, is French Tips. "Really, Shawn?" I say to him one more time and then i walk away.
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The rest of the day goes by in a blur. Matt tries to talk to me but i don't let him. Alicia and her crooked nose gives me glares. Shawn doesn't even try to meet my eyes. And from Ali and everybody else, i just get stares and sympathetic smiles. Life's just great. And to make everything just so much better, i get home and Austin decides to be oh so nice to me.
"What's wrong with you?" He throws me against the wall, my arm hits something sharp.
"Nothing, Austin. Nothing at all." i try to walk away but he puts his arm under my chin, pinning me to the wall by my neck.
"Then what's this?" He wipes a tear from my eye.
"Huh, how'd that get there?" I narrow my eyes. "Can we not do this while Alex is here?"
He scoffs and rolls his eyes, "Whatever." He lets go of me and goes to his room.
Really, all i wanna do now is lay down and cry with maybe a box of ice cream. But instead i go see Alex. I walk upstairs to her room and stop by the door. i watch her play for awhile, i watch as she has a tea party with her stuffed animals. "Hear you go, Fred. Your tea, Jeff." She says. And then something else. "Would you like sugar with that, dad? How about some creamer, mom?" five seats around the table, one for Alex, two for mom and dad, and two for Fred and Jeff.
I clear my throat. "Hi, A." She smiles at me and runs into my arms. "How was your day at school?"
She hugs me tight, "It was good, sissy. But i missed Mom and Dad a lot today." I swear, this girl.
"Me, too." I ruffle her hair. She smiles though, and laughs, like we didn't just talk about mom and dad. I guess that's how some 5 year olds are. "Let's go eat some snacks, yeah?"
She looks at me and grins. "Okay, A." Then she walks out of the room.
I look at the table of plastic drink ware with the five chairs around it. One empty, one with a dinosaur, another with a pink monkey, and the last two with picture frames propped between the table and the chair. I grab mom and dad and put them back where they belong. "Sissy, i'm hungry!" i can heat Alex.
"Coming, love." i whisper.
I'm spreading the peanut butter into the celery when there's a knock on the door. "I'll get it!" my sister says.
"No, Al-" I start, scared it's gonna be one of Austin's dealers. But what stops me is Matt, standing in the doorway, with red cheeks. "Oh, Matt." i walk over to him and he collapses in my arms. I lead him over to the couch. "Just a minute." I set him down and finish the food. I serve it to Alex and go to the living room. "Now, spill."
He just looks at me, tears gathering in his eyes. He hiccups and then says it, "Alicia broke up with me." At first, I'm happy. And then i realize that my only real friend is crushed and literally breaking down in my lap. My lap, of all the laps in the world.
"I'm sorry, Matt," i respond, running my fingers through his hair. "I know how much she meant to you."
"A year, a whole year. That's how long it's been since we kissed. Me and you." He almost yells.
"I'm sorry. This is all my fault. I shouldn't have kissed you. And i shouldn't have let Shawn keep the picture." I apologize.
Matt sits up. With red eyes, tear-stained cheeks, and a sniffle, he yells at me. "You're right, it is your fault. If you just wouldn't have cheated on me, we could be sitting on this couch right now, but not crying. We could be laughing or making out. We could still be together! But no, you had to let your stupid little hormones get in the way!" And with that, he gets up and storms out, slamming the door behind him.
I blink. And i look through the window as he gets in his car and drives off. Away from this house, away from Alex, and away from me. Maybe it's for the best.
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That night, after i put Alex to bed and do some homework, i lay on my back, looking at the ceiling. There's glow in the dark stars all over it, big and small. I remember when mom and dad put them up there. Oh, how i miss them.
*****
After the boat ride, Shawn took me home, Matt had to go see Alicia and be there for her.
I will admit, i was a bit tipsy when Shawn opened the car door for me. "Why thank you, kind sir." I tip my 'hat' at him.
"You're welcome, malady." He tips it back.
"Walk me in?" i flutter my eyelashes at him and hold my arm out. He takes it and we both giggle. When we get to the door, i can immediately tell something is off. The door's cracked open a little bit, and my parents never make that mistake. "Shawn?"
He sees what's happening. "i'll be right back." And then he jogs to his car.
"Shawn! What the hell? Get back here!" I whisper-yell as he opens his trunk, grins, and retrieves a baseball bat. I roll my eyes.
He closes the trunk, very loudly, and i instinctively jump as the door flies open and out comes running a figure. It stops right at the doorway with its gun pointed at me. "Don't move!" says the figure. "Move and i will shoot you." His hand is shaking.
"Woah, slow down there, bud." i put my hands up.
"Don't tell me to slow down!" He says in a shaky voice, stepping closer. I can't see Shawn anymore so i think that this guy doesn't know he's here. Which is good. But also not good, because I just might die.
The light from the doorway lights the mans face up a little bit as he gets closer. His eyes are huge and frightened. There's blood on the gun, on his hands, and on his face. Like he just shot somebody...
In my peripheral vision, i see Shawn rear back his baseball bat like he's going in for a hit, but right before he does, i realize that my parents are inside. And if they would've heard an intruder barging outside, they would've come with a gun, whether i was here or not. But they haven't. And i realize why. "Mom! Dad!" I sob, as i look inside the house. There they are, right there. Laying on the floor, pools of blood gathered around moms chest and dads head. Their hands intertwined.
"I said don't move!" Pain. I feel pain. I hear a thud and a scream and another thud. Then i see nothing.
*****
I drift off into yet another nightmare.
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