Justin's POV
I tried fumbling with my tie for the tenth time and was unsuccessful once again. Jeremy had taught me how to knot a tie when I was four, and I had never forgotten. Now my mind was just too full and too crazy for simple motor functions. It was even hard to breathe.
I stared at myself in the mirror of the bathroom and tried to exhale the stress out of my shoulders. It didn't work.
We had been in Italy for about fifteen hours now and it was still sinking in that my life back on the island was over. My freedom was gone. On top of that, I had to attend my great-grandfather's funeral today, and re-meet my family for the first time in four years. To say it like that, it only made me more insane.
My sleep deprivation, coupled with the time difference, and the impending sorrow of the day was making me slightly irritable.
Maddie and I occupied a large hotel room in a modern, posh establishment, right in the heart of Rome. Jaxon was, of course, with the family a floor below who were happy to see him, as he told it. He came to see us early this morning with all the details.
Everyone was sad but fine. He said they looked tired.
I didn't know if we should be springing my arrival on them like this, but Jeremy thought it might be better to just get it out in the open. After the funeral, I would be able to talk with them. I had no idea what I was going to say. I was going to take it one step at a time.
But first, I had to get through this fucking funeral.
I had been to maybe one hundred in my lifetime. With the sort of existence we lived, it was a given that people were going to die. We usually went to funerals out of respect. A friend or colleague dies, you go see his burial. It was simple. But nothing would be able to prepare me for this day.
How was I supposed to react to this? My grandfather, the man I looked up to most—the man who raised me to be who I am today—was dead. I never in my life thought I would say that. Hell, it was almost predetermined that I was going to die before him. I should have died before him. According to everyone but a select few, I had died before him.
The core of our family was gone. I knew we were strong enough not to crumble, but it was still slightly strange. It was almost like sailing in pitch-black darkness without a lighthouse. Who would I call when I was pissed at Jeremy? Who was going to give me straightforward, honest answers to my questions? Who was going to kick my ass when I was fucking up? That was always Nicola's job.
Granted, I hadn't spoken to the man in years, but that couldn't be helped. It was just nice to know that he was out there if I needed him. Now he was gone.
I took a deep breath to steady myself and attempted again to work my tie into the appropriate position. I didn't accomplish my goal and ended up looking more disheveled.
Like the angel that she was, Maddie glided into the bathroom and took over for me, nimbly fixing my tie without a word.
We had gone shopping last night, and Rome boasted some of the best fashion in the world. Never in my wildest dreams did I think that Maddie would take advantage of it. She was in a simple black dress with capped sleeves that was hugging her body and black high heels. She picked it all out herself. Her hair was down, over her shoulders and her face was soft with minimal makeup.
"What?" She asked.
"Nothing. I just can't help looking at you."
Maddie smiled, showing a perfect row of teeth, "You're getting very good with your words. I think this new, more vocal Justin is a keeper."
"The more vocal Justin is bound to get in more trouble."
"That's true."
Standing in front of me was a woman, not the girl I met four years ago and I loved her now more than I did then. Of course, that brought up the question of marriage. Isn't that what people did when they were in love? According to societal standards, I was supposed to have a ring on my finger and 2.5 kids by now. I was behind.
I did plan on marrying Maddie one day. It was different now that I was older and could realize that marriage wasn't the end of the world. I wasn't sure exactly how I was supposed to be a good husband, though. Maddie was the only person that made me doubt myself and the thought of being her spouse just complicated things in my head. To be honest, it wasn't the marriage itself that bothered me as much as the actual wedding did.
Fucking suits, fucking white dresses, fucking cake, fucking first dances, fucking wedding...
My stomach churned just thinking about it.
But I did understand her point of view. Most women thought about that stuff, right? They wanted a big wedding with the flower girls and soft strings playing in the background and a nice reception.
Disgusting.
I don't know why I had such an aversion to that stuff, but I couldn't help it. I guess I was just programmed that way. I would suck it up for Maddie. Did she want all that? I was afraid to ask.
"It's so weird seeing you in real clothes," I stated and wanted to mentally slap myself. I was working on being more romantic. Out of all the things I could say to her, that was it?
Stupid, Justin!
She snorted in laughter. "I was going to say the same thing to you. This suit is nice."
"Armani, of course."
"Of course." She finished with my tie and fixed my jacket, "You look incredibly dapper and handsome."
After all that time on the beach, wearing bathing suits and shorts, seeing myself in a suit was kind of a shock. My black get-up was nicely pressed and had the smell of new fabric. I hadn't worn something like this in years, and I tried to roll my shoulders around, getting the feel for it.
"Can I kiss you?" I asked unexpectedly.
"Sure," Her face started to move towards mine.
Our lips met and as they always did, connected with a spark that I would never tire of feeling. My hands wrapped around her waist and pulled her closer. Today was a day for soft kisses and the sexual fire stayed at bay because we both knew we didn't have time for anything more. When she moaned and her hands traveled up my chest, I pulled away.
She was gloriously breathless, as was I.
"You still make me melt." Maddie whispered, "I can't help it."
"Good," I smirked, "You're falling for my plan nicely."
"I've already fallen." Maddie kissed me once again before pulling away completely, "How are you doing?" She asked, looking at me in the mirror.
"I'm waiting for it to hit me. Shouldn't I cry?" I reached for the bag on the counter and took a couple of anti-anxiety pills.
She shrugged. "Some people don't. I remember when we went to Grandma Fell's funeral, Freddie didn't produce one tear. He cried more when he closed his finger in the car door."
"Nicola wouldn't want me to cry. He'd tell me to celebrate his fucking life because he was better than God." I chuckled at the memory of him actually uttering that phrase a couple of times.
"Is it going to be a big funeral?"
"Probably. Everyone loved him, even his enemies; they couldn't help it. He lives in this town about an hour outside of the city called Monticello. He was the mayor for years and built that area. They're all rich because of him. I heard they had a small ceremony in Sicily yesterday, though."
"That's where he was originally from?"
I nodded. "He said he would never go back there, even if we dragged him. In Sicily, he grew up poor as shit and hated it. After he made all of his money in Chicago and retired, he moved to Monticello, but he traveled everywhere."
"I only knew him for a short time, but he made me feel like family. I'm sorry you lost him." She ran her hand up my arm and gave it a squeeze.
"He was a good man to his family."
My phone in my jacket pocket vibrated and I picked it up, seeing a text message from Jeremy. They were leaving now and there was a car waiting for Maddie and me downstairs.
"Is it time to go?" she asked.
"Yup. Let's get this over with." I fixed the small piece of hair that was astray and had been annoying the hell out of me since I got out of the shower, making myself perfect.
We took the elevator down to the first floor. The ride was excruciatingly slow, but when the doors finally opened, I didn't even want to get out. Maddie had to take my hand and drag me across the marble floor of the hotel lobby, which was buzzing with people.
We got into the backseat of a town car that was waiting where Jeremy said it would be. It pulled out into the streets.
It was a warm and sunny February day. I rolled the windows down to let the air flow through the car, and Maddie kept a tight hold on my hand for the whole ride. As we went further into the countryside, childhood memories began to flood back into my mind.
I spent every summer here until I was twenty-one, and I even completed a semester at the local university in business school. Nicola took all of us in and taught us what he knew, but I don't think Finn and Keegan looked up to him like I did. He was my mentor, whereas they were more in line with Jeremy's methods.
The rolling hills just made me remember him more. There were days when I spent hours running through those hills. I'd be so tired, Nicola had to push me home.
"This place is stunning," Maddie said from next to me, her face almost pressed against the glass of the window.
"I know. I have a house about two hours from the coast if you ever want to come back."
"You have a house here?" She looked at me with wide eyes.
"Well, it's in the opposite direction, but yes."
"I never knew that."
"I'm sure I told you."
"No, I would remember that. I would demand to visit a place like this."
"Well then, we'll have to come back," I promised, "during a happier time."
"We should have come here to hide out." She gazed at the knolls of the countryside again.
"I wish."
The drive took longer than I remembered, but I soon saw the small town of Monticello begin to appear around us.
It was one of those places that were left untouched by modernity and kept the unique, Italian feel about it. All the elderly women still told fables and made rich marinara sauces that burned your tongue but you'd be willing to die for. To someone looking in from the outside, the small bubble that the city lived in could only come out of a movie.
Today, even though the sun was shining, you could tell that an emotional depression had hit the town. All the windows were covered in black, the shops were closed, and the streets were bare of people. Nicola Rossini's funeral was something that called for complete attention. Nothing was going to disrupt this day.
The one thing that I could count on was that the massive, Catholic church would be the only place with any kind of activity. The parking lot was so full that we had to park a couple of blocks away. It seemed like people from all over had come for this.
Maddie and I purposefully arrived late so that we didn't attract any attention.
I helped her over the cobblestoned streets on our way to the church. I could hear music without even opening the door and saw that people were already forming a processional to make the long walk to the gravesite after the funeral.
In the vestibule of the church, large vases of flowers overflowed the tables, and the red carpet under my feet dented softly as I walked towards the large oak doors of the sanctuary.
"Wait, Justin." Maddie pulled me back. "We have to sign this." She pointed to a guestbook near the door.
"Oh." I looked at the thick book, which had pages upon pages of people's messy scribbling. Some were in Italian and some were in English.
"What should I say?" she asked me.
"I don't know," I answered truthfully. Never once, during all the funerals that I attended, had I signed a guestbook.
She thought for a long second, biting her lip softly, before taking the pen and quickly writing something that I couldn't make out over her shoulder. She turned the page and handed me the pen.
"Can I read what you wrote?" I asked.
"No," she shook her head, "it's embarrassing."
I was really curious but spent my time thinking about what to say instead of arguing. It took me a couple of seconds before I figured it out. I remembered Nicola's toast that he would always say at birthdays or weddings or family gatherings. It was simple but got the point across.
I wrote it in Italian.
Avere una famiglia significa avere qualcuno da amare, avere una casa significa avere un posto dove andare, averli entrambi è una benedizione.
Having someone to love is family, having somewhere to go is home, having both is a blessing.
Even though Nicola was the most ruthless man I knew, he loved his family and wasn't afraid to show it.
I drew the Bieber family crest under the quote—which consisted of an eagle, perched on a crescent moon, and signed it: J.D.B.—Justin Drew Bieber.
"Okay, we can go in now." I put the pen down next to the book.
Maddie fixed my tie one more time before I opened the door. The sanctuary was packed to the walls. There were seats available in the back, but many of the old, devout Catholics liked to stand out of respect. Maddie and I took a seat in the very last pew.
There was a priest up front, talking in rapid Italian and crossing himself multiple times. Everyone was in black and sniffles filled the air around us. A large, closed casket was behind the podium, swarming with flowers and wreaths. There was a choir who sang the traditional funeral songs, but I wasn't listening. I was searching the crowd for my family.
There were probably about three hundred people packed into the small church, so it wasn't easy, but I found them when I saw Jaxon's blue eyes suspiciously looking behind him from the front row. He spotted me and mouthed some words. I couldn't make them out.
I snapped my fingers in the air, and he abruptly turned around.
I let my eyes travel down the same pew he was in and saw that he was seated next to a rigid Jeremy. Next to him, I saw the shaking shoulders and auburn hair of my mother. I had to catch my breath at even the sight of the back of her head. I didn't know why, but I suddenly got kind of lightheaded.
I shook my head to clear it and searched for everyone else.
Olivia was sitting next to Pattie, with a big ass black hat that was almost the size of Saturn. She had her arm around Pattie, and it looked like they were both crying. Finn sat next to her and the first thing I noticed that his hair was cut shorter, almost like it was in high school. Then there was Bridget who was, of course, not paying attention. She was fixing her hair. I figured after all this time, she would have grown up some. Obviously not. Keegan was next and his massive body took up the space of two, but his suit was tailored perfectly, which was always an issue I had with him. He never cared about how his clothes fit, and it pissed me off. I see that he had taken my advice to heart now.
I was surprised to see his large arm comforting the tiny body of none other than Cici.
My grandmother is here? What the hell's going on?
It must be some practical joke. I was further thrown into confusion when I saw her crying.
"This is the most peculiar funeral I've ever been to," I whispered to Maddie who was examining the family as well.
"Everyone seems so filled with emotion."
"Nicola affected people that way."
The service dragged on for another two hours. Jeremy made a speech, the mayor made a speech, friends made speeches, and other people just cried. All the Catholic traditions were kept, and the Bible scriptures that people read sounded like they were from the heart. I had never seen so much sobbing. Maddie even choked out a couple of tears but wiped them away quickly.
I was oddly detached from it all. Shouldn't I be feeling some form of sorrow? I felt fine. I had no tears to produce and was actually kind of bored. Maybe I needed to be closer.
When the priest finally wrapped things up, I was exhausted.
Starting from the front pew, everyone stood up and walked up to the casket, dropping a flower at the foot of the podium. My family was first, and Keegan had to practically carry Cici up there. One by one, they came up the aisle of the church, headed towards the doors.
Of course, Maddie and I just had to sit in the spot where they could see us the best. They were preoccupied with getting out of the church quickly to notice, but it was a close call. We had to duck out heads secretively so that they didn't know who we were. They came so close that I could smell Pattie's perfume and actually felt the fabric of Bridget's dress when it brushed up against me.
Jaxon was the last in the group and slapped the back of my head in jest on his way out. He was going to get his ass kicked for that.
Slowly, everyone else in the church did the same thing and dropped a flower at the front of the church. The pews began to evaporate of people, and they all went outside into the sun to wait for the casket to start making its journey to the cemetery. The altar boys were waiting to carry it and had their heads bowed in reverence.
Maddie and I were the last two people in the church, waiting until the casket was carried out before moving. We didn't have any flowers to give.
We stayed in the back of the immense group that started making its way down the streets.
"I can't believe we were that close to them," I said quietly as I put on my sunglasses.
"I thought they could see us for sure."
"They were kind of preoccupied, but I could actually smell them."
"I know." Maddie took my hand.
"What did you write in his guestbook?"
"Nothing special. I only met him once and just thanked him for being so welcoming to me."
"He told me that he thought you were one hell of a woman."
She laughed quietly, "I wished I knew him better. How are you holding up?" That was about the fifth time she asked me that today. It was starting to get on my nerves, but I would never tell her.
"I'm fine," I replied honestly. "I can't wait for this day to be over though. Then we can start moving forward."
"You haven't cried yet," she pointed out.
"Did you expect me to?"
"Well... no, but maybe you should. It might be healthy to cry."
"I'll be okay."
The man in front of us whipped his head around and glared at me. His southern Italian accent was thick as he spewed, "You need to shut up. I have listened to you talk for the last two minutes and it's getting on my nerves."
"Fuck you," I snapped. "Walk faster if you don't want to listen to my conversation. No one asked for your comments."
"Nicola would be ashamed in both of you."
"Fuck. You." I said slowly.
"I'm so sorry, sir," Maddie interjected, squeezing my hand tightly.
"Don't apologize to him," I told her.
"This is a funeral. Have some respect." He squinted angrily.
"So says that man who showed up drunk." I could smell the wine on his breath from here and he was wobbling a little.
"It helps me cope." He choked out as if he was about to cry.
A lady, who must have been his wife, turned him around and they walked up ahead.
It was quiet the rest of the way to the cemetery. I just listened to the sound of hundreds of feet crunching on the pavement. Like a herd of cattle, we shuffled through town with heads bowed and sniffing was the dominant sound. All this emotion was making me highly uncomfortable. Everyone was bumping into me and I had to stop myself from yelling. Thankfully, people began to trail off down side streets and into their houses as we passed them. The group got smaller with each step.
The Monticello cemetery was so big that it covered a couple of acres on the far side of the town and white headstones stretched back forever. There were large iron gates that climbed upwards at the entrance and everyone stopped. Only family was allowed at the burial, per Nicola's request. He once told me that he didn't want outsiders there at his weakest moment.
The gates were closed with a clang and by this time, only about fifty people were waiting at the entrance. Maddie and I had to watch as Jeremy and everyone else in the family kept walking down the path of the cemetery towards the back.
I shuddered at the eerie feeling that crept up my spine.
"We can't go in?" Maddie asked.
"No. That would be too close. I'm supposed to be dead, remember?"
I checked my watch and noticed that it was time to go. Maddie and I walked back to the car and whisked up to the street, out of town.
Nicola lived in a large, sprawling estate on the outskirts. It was the biggest mansion I had ever seen in my life, which actually comprised of a couple of houses all strung together. Nothing had ever compared to it I think he owned something like six hundred acres. I wasn't sure about the square footage of the house itself, but I'm sure I wouldn't believe the number anyway.
I could see what Jeremy was talking about when he said the place was somewhat destroyed. The outside was still standing but looked like someone had tried to light it on fire. There were deep scorch marks all over the façade but the beauty of the mansion could still be seen.
"Oh my God," Maddie breathed in wonder as we pulled into the back driveway. "This is ridiculously beautiful."
"I know. He never skimped on money. He loved to spend. He built this thing, but I don't think he ever stayed more than a couple months here."
"What reason would one man have to own all of this?"
"It's a kind of 'my dick is bigger than yours' type thing." I helped her out of the car, which was now parked.
"Men are weird." She scrunched up her nose.
"Yes, we are."
Don't ask me how he got there because I didn't know, but as soon as I opened the back door, Jeremy was pulling us up the stairs of the house. We passed cleaning crews who were picking up the wreckage of the house. The inside was chaotic with mess and it hurt me to see the piano, which I had played on as a child, destroyed to splintering wood.
"Everyone else will be here shortly. I said I had to leave early to settle things with the will." Jeremy spoke quickly and quietly after shutting the door to a large office-type room on the third floor.
"Do they suspect anything?" Maddie asked.
"No, thank God. I don't know how I've kept this up for so long. I take it you've seen them already?"
I nodded. "Even Cici."
"Surprisingly, she's quite torn up. Who would've known?" He looked out of the window. "They're here. I'll bring Pattie in last so you can talk to everyone else first. She's going to be the tough one to win over."
I stood up straighter, preparing myself for the bombardment of awkwardness that was sure to come. Maddie and I didn't say anything until Jeremy shut the door on his way out.
"Do you have a speech prepared or something?" She asked me.
"No, I figured I would just let them talk first. Maybe they'll think I'm some kind of magic trick."
"Well, unlike you, I'm alive and have to think of something to say. I just don't know how they'll react."
I almost stopped breathing when I heard footsteps in the hallway a couple of minutes later. Maddie and I looked at each other with anxious eyes. She shuffled up next to me.
This is it.
"Jeremy, what is this?" Olivia's squeaky voice asked. "I have to help Pattie get things ready for dinner."
"I need you to see someone first," he said.
"When are we going back home?" Keegan croaked. I could tell that he had been crying.
"In a couple of days," he replied shortly. "Come inside."
The door opened and Olivia was the first one to come in, tripping over herself. Finn reached out to catch her before she fell.
"Oh, my. I'm all clumsy today." She smoothed out her clothes.
The world slowed down to a snail's pace. The first eyes I saw were Bridget's. Everyone else's followed. They stopped moving when they realized that there were two people were standing in front of them... and one was supposed to be dead.
There was a mixture of fear and confusion in all their faces. Jaxon brought up the rear, but stayed in the corner, not daring to speak. They all looked the same; iridescently pale, beautiful in their own way with strong faces and distinguished stances.
I let out a deep breath at the sight of my brothers. We were finally all in the same room, and I felt stronger just being in their presence. It was no secret that we all worked better as a single unit. Being without them was weakening. I felt like I had my strength back somehow.
No one moved. All their mouths were opened and I almost saw the blood drain from their skin.
"Jeremy, what's going on?" Keegan asked, his voice low and strangled.
"So...I think we need to talk," he said.
"Is there a ghost in this house?" Keegan's mouth hung open. "I think there is because you're supposed to be dead!" He pointed at me.
"Well... I'm not." I shrugged.
"No shit." Finn stepped forward. "What the hell are you doing here?"
"I came to the funeral."
"You came to the funeral?" Keegan mocked me. "Is that all you have to say after two fucking years in the grave?"
"What did you expect me to say?" I was already getting too defensive. I really wanted to try and keep the peace, but...well, I've never been good at backing down when someone shouts at me. It's a curse.
"Okay, let's calm down." Jeremy stood in between us.
"What's going on?" Bridget blinked rapidly. "I think I see him, but that can't be him..."
"Oh, it's him," Keegan scoffed. "That fucker faked his death. Classic Nicola move." He started to pat himself down for what I assumed was a cigarette or maybe a gun.
"Maddie, did you know about this?" Olivia asked her.
She nodded. "We've been hiding away for the past couple of years."
"I don't understand," Bridget stated.
"We were hiding," I repeated. "I was being hunted, so my wonderful and gracious father decided to ship me off to Brazil. Maddie's been with me for the past two years since she got out of jail."
There was a lot of talking all at once. Actually, it was more like shouting. Everyone had something to say, except Olivia and Maddie. They just stood there, looking at each other while the commotion exploded around them.
The main person who was trying to yell at me was Keegan. I didn't really understand what he was saying through the cigarette in his mouth, but it was evident from his red face, he was not pleased. Finn was trying to get answers out of me, which I didn't really have. Bridget was, of course, just talking shit. Jaxon and Jeremy were trying to keep everyone calm. It wasn't working.
"You knew, didn't you?" Finn turned on Jeremy. "How could you not tell us?"
"I was protecting you all. Your brother was in a bad situation; what would you have me do?"
"I expected you to trust us enough to say something," Keegan yelled. "This is bullshit. Our whole family was hurting because of this and you knew the whole time."
"I had to make a choice."
Keegan pointed at me. "You could have called, wrote, something. I couldn't eat for months after..." He let out a deep breath.
"Even though I didn't agree with how Jeremy handled the situation with Maddie, I didn't have a say in the matter. Talk to him!" I barked.
"You should have told us!" Keegan took a step towards me.
"It wasn't my job to inform you about what was going on. I had to make sure Maddie and I were safe."
"Justin, you're excuses are shit." Finn suddenly shoved me...hard.
My stance wasn't prepared and I fell over the desk, landing on the floor with a thud.
Maddie was at my side in a second, "Are you alright, Justin?"
"Maddie, give me your purse," I growled.
"Why? What are you going to do?" She asked worriedly.
I snatched it out of her hands and grabbed the handy pocketknife that she was never without. I took off my jacket and prepared for battle.
"Stay on the floor because I don't want you to get involved in this," I instructed.
"Justin..."
I shot up from the ground and didn't even think as I switched the blade open with a flick of my wrist. I charged Finn and he maneuvered easily away from me, but I was quick on his tail and chased him around the room, ready to stab the shit out of the bastard.
"Don't run from me!" I almost caught him, "We're not kids, Finn."
"You're lucky I don't have anything to beat you with." He ridiculed me, "Just wait until I have a fucking bat in my hands."
"Justin, stop this," Jeremy shouted.
Finn jumped over the table, with surprising agility, and stared me down, "Are you going to stab me, brother?"
"You bet your ass I am." I gripped the switchblade tighter in my hands, determined not to just throw the thing.
"Can't we be civilized?" Keegan pushed Finn into the far corner, "We need to have a conversation, not kill each other."
Maddie's small hands quickly took the knife out of my grasp and quickly disabled it, "Don't ever take my switchblade again. You have too many anger issues to use something like this. You could have stabbed everyone in the room."
"He fucking pushed me." I ran my now free fingers through my hair, willing myself to calm down.
"From your own words, we're not kids, Justin!" Finn bellowed from across the room.
Maddie put her hands on my chest and the touch immediately worked wonders, cooling my fiery anger, "Not here. Now's not the time. You can kill him later."
"Promise?" I darkly chuckled at the prospect of me choking the hell out of my brother.
"I promise. Everyone needs to talk first. Please calm down." She softly placed her lips at the base of my neck. She quickly handed me two anxiety pills that I dry swallowed.
The room was starting to cool and I could tell that Finn wanted to say something, but Olivia was talking quickly and quietly, trying to calm him as Maddie was doing with me.
"I was doing what I thought was best," Jeremy told us all, "I knew it was going to cause this divide, but it had to be done."
"And you kept this from Pattie?" Bridget asked, disgusted. "I can't believe you."
"Okay, let's just breathe," Jaxon said, trying to be the peacemaker.
No one spoke, but we glared at each other with deadly eyes. Keegan and Finn, especially, were starting holes into my suit. They should be directing their anger at Jeremy. He was the leader of this family. I fought him as much as I could, but when he commanded you to do something, you can't say no. It was how it had always worked. I could fight as much as I wanted, but at the end of the day, Jeremy had the final say.
"I did what I did to protect this family," Jeremy said without a hint of regret. "I know it hurts us all, but I had to protect Justin."
"It's always about Justin," Finn squinted. "We were a family. You shattered us."
There was more silence. I really didn't have anything to say to them at the moment. If they wanted to bitch at me for something I couldn't control, let them.
"And what do you have to say for yourself?" Bridget asked Maddie rudely.
Maddie calmly glowered at Bridget with intense eyes "Don't start with me. Just don't. Out of all the people in this room, I should be the one shouting and yelling at the top of my lungs, but I'm not."
"I was your friend, Maddie. You should have told me where you were or what was going on."
"My friend? You didn't visit me at all for that last year. None of you, for that matter, came to see me while I was rotting away for your fucking sins. I've forgiven everyone, but that doesn't mean I have to forget." Maddie's voice was hard with pent-up anger that was bubbling towards the surface.
Olivia, Keegan, Finn, and Bridget all had to bow their heads in shame for that. I didn't know much about what happened when Maddie was in jail because she rarely talked about it, but she was pissed at how abandoned she felt by everyone. They left her, just like I had, but they hadn't received her rage yet.
"You have the nerve to stand there and judge Justin for not calling or telling you he was okay? Where was my fucking call?" she said crossly. "I sat in that jail and could have ratted you all out, but I didn't because I care about this family. I really do, no matter how stupid that may be."
They didn't have anything to say.
"Get the fuck over it. The only one who has the right to be angry here is Pattie. That's a different story on its own, but you know Jeremy would have done the same for any of you. He was protecting Justin."
"Maddie..." Bridget began.
"Shut up!" She shouted.
It was now my turn to calm her and I softly undid her fingers from around the knife, which was shaking in her hands. I put it in my pocket for safekeeping.
"We thought he died," Keegan said softly, still not looking at Maddie. "We thought we lost him."
"You have no idea what I lost. I needed a family after..." Maddie bit her lip, willing herself not to go further, but I could tell what she wanted to say. "We all hurt, but we need each other now. Obviously, things aren't going as well as they should be. Nicola is dead and he wouldn't want to see us like this. We don't need to be fighting right now."
The first one to take a real breath was Olivia as her eyes shifted to Maddie. She took off and made it across the room in a second, grabbing Maddie's body and pulling it towards her.
"I really missed you and I'm sorry for not visiting. I know that's no excuse, but I was scared, Maddie. We all were. I can't believe this. It's so good to see you." She said all in one exhale.
"Hi, Olivia." Maddie embraced her back. They held onto each other tightly for a couple of seconds. "I've missed you too."
"You just left. We never even got to say goodbye." Olivia pulled back, wiping her face.
Maddie nodded. "Jaxon didn't give me much time before he kidnapped me and took me to Brazil."
"Jaxon knew about this too?" Finn spun around. "I thought you were in fucking boarding school?"
Jaxon pointed at Jeremy as a response.
"This is ridiculous." Keegan stubbed out his cigarette on the wall.
"Are you guys back for good? Why are you here?" Olivia asked.
"Jeremy called." Maddie shrugged as if that answered everything. "He said we needed to be together."
Olivia looked at me over Maddie's shoulder. "It's nice to see you."
"You too, Olivia." I nodded. She was one of the few people I could stand in the world.
"Can I hug you?" She asked.
I chuckled, "Yes."
She ran towards me and her arms were like vice grips on my body as she squeezed the life out of me. It was almost painful. I hugged her back.
The anger from everyone started to dissolve and after Olivia let me go, I was suddenly in the arms of my oldest brother.
"You sick son of a bitch." He lifted me off the ground. "I always knew you weren't dead."
"Oh, really?" I rasped out.
"Yeah," Keegan set me down, "you wouldn't go down like that. I'm still pissed at you, but I'm happier that you're back."
"I would have called if I could," I admitted.
He clapped my shoulder. "I can forgive you because truth be told; I know I would have done the same thing. Oh, and look...tailored suit."
"I saw that. It looks nice." I checked the label in the back.
Armani.
Finn took his place and eyed me suspiciously. "Is it really you?"
I showed him my palm with the deep, healed cut that was made when I turned thirteen by the same dagger that made the identical scar on his palm.
"I'm not so easy to convince as Keegan is. You don't have my forgiveness just yet." He shook my hand like this was a business proposition.
"I wasn't looking for your forgiveness," I said.
"I know." He shrugged. "Just give me some time to think about this. It's been so long without you, I forgot what it was like to have three brothers instead of two.
"I know what you mean."
"We're just shocked." Bridget surprisingly embraced me without an acidic tone. "How did you expect us to react?"
I didn't have an answer for her.
"I'm glad you're back, Justin. It's been hell without you."
Olivia was bouncing and clapping her hands wildly. "This day started off so sad, but now look. We're all back together. Back from the dead, and back from... Well, wherever the hell Maddie was."
"How about we sit down and talk?" Jeremy suggested, pointing to the chairs around the room.
It took about an hour for me to explain in detail what had happened when Robert was first coming for my blood.
They knew that Jeremy shipped me off to Switzerland since I was in contact with them for about two years. They heard my screams and shouts when Maddie wasn't released from prison and up until that point, all the gaps in my story were filled.
It got rather complicated when I came back here to get Maddie. I was actually in Chicago for about a week. No one knew that besides Jeremy. He was trying to calm me down, but nothing worked. I was still planning on releasing Maddie from jail. When it was clear that I wasn't going to deter my plans, I was forced out of the country. I don't even remember it. One minute, I was in his office, and the next I was on a plane to Brazil.
That was why I was mad at Jeremy now. He drugged me, against my will, and placed me somewhere I didn't want to be. Of course, I couldn't go back at that point because if I went to jail, there wouldn't be a better solution for Maddie. She wasn't going to get out until her time was up and for me to get myself arrested for faking my own death, it would have caused more damage than good. I just had to wait.
Maddie took over the tale from when she got to the island, but after that point, there wasn't anything exciting to say.
"We have been hiding out with Jaxon until things blew over," Maddie concluded the story. "Justin is the only one who gets to talk to Jeremy and it's only for five minutes every couple of months. I haven't even spoken to Freddie in two years."
"I still can't believe that you kept this from us," Keegan said to Jeremy. "Did you think we would tell anyone?"
"No, but I couldn't chance it. Every person who knew was at risk and my plan still didn't work. They were ambushed too."
"Really?" Finn asked in surprise. "By the same fucking guys?"
"I would assume so. They stormed the island and we were unprepared." I shrugged.
"Well, shit," he leaned back in his seat, "this is serious."
"Now you see why I did what I did. I was protecting all of us because they were going to kill Justin. They'll still want to kill him." Jeremy sighed, "My family is never going to be safe. I'm working on finding out who they are and who hired them."
"They're based out of a company in Texas," I repeated the information that I got from Ben before I killed him.
They looked at me with slightly surprised faces.
"Just because I lived on an island doesn't mean I wasn't working." I sighed, "If someone attacks my family, you better believe I'm going to find out who it is."
"We can defend ourselves." Jaxon puffed out his chest.
"But only together. We're not too successful separated," I disclosed. "And I think people know that."
"Well, it's not like anything's different in Chicago," Keegan said. "Everyone still wants a piece of us."
"Aro's still there?" Maddie asked.
"Unfortunately. The old bastard is trying his hardest to keep up, but he's failing miserably."
I was about to say something, but my ears picked up the soft padding of heels on the carpet in the hallway.
"Jeremy? Where are you?" Pattie's voice asked in her sweet tone. "Actually, where is anybody? I've been cooking for two hours and making sure the people coming over are alright. I figured you all needed some time alone but this is ridiculous."
"Oh, shit." Finn got up from his chair too quickly and stumbled backward to the floor.
Jeremy was whipping his head around from me to the door, trying to judge what exactly he should do.
"I'm not going anywhere," I answered his silent question for him.
"I forgot all about her," Bridget said to Keegan. "She's going to burn us alive."
Just then, the door cracked open a sliver. Pattie poked her head in with a sad smile. "What's everyone doing up here?"
"Um, nothing, sweetheart." Jeremy got up from his seat and blocked her from the view of the room.
"What's going on? It looks like a family meeting."
"We were just trying to figure a few things out before we go back home."
Pattie sidestepped him and looked around the seemingly unthreatening room. Her eyes landed on mine as if they were magnets, trained to seek me out.
A strange thing happened in which she kind of went blank as if...she had seen a ghost. That was the best way to describe it. Within a second, a thousand emotions passed over her face.
Confusion.
Fear.
Sadness.
Those were the ones I could pick up on easily.
"Hi, Ma," I said, my voice only rising to a whisper.
Pattie started to sway on her feet and Jeremy caught her before she fell to the ground.
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