Anne's P.O.V
I opened my eyes to see something white. It was large and shiny, making the whole room seem clean and neat. Fuck. Hospital. I was lying on a bed, in the middle. Should I sit up? Wouldn't it hurt? I put my hand under my T-shirt to feel the bandages on my stomach and chest, but I didn't feel anything. Only my skin, which was smoother than ever. This can't be happening. I was shot. I know that, I couldn't heal in five seconds. Or wait...How long has it been since then? Maybe it's been months or years. Don't tell me there is no clock in this room. Am I in a coma? This is what that feels like? Or maybe I'm dead and this is heaven. Or so if I even get to heaven and not hell. Is there heaven really? Or an afterlife?
Tzuyu must be worried. Tzuyu...holy shit, what happened to her? She didn't got shot did she? Is she alive, is she happy? Maybe she's already found someone else for herself. Someone better, who could protect her more than me. What time is it really? I need to find a clock. A calendar maybe. I need to know where I am. Or when I am.
I pushed myself up to look around me. The room was empty except for the bed I was sitting on. There was a door on my right, plain white, just like my clothing. White T-shirt and white pants, without shoes. I let my legs hang from the edge of the bed for a few minutes.
Maybe I should look around. The door must lead somewhere...somewhere I can do something. I need to find Tzuyu, I need to calm her, I need to tell her I'm fine. Nothing happened.
I let my feet touch the ground. I was expecting something ice-cold, but it was nice and warm. I wasn't cold even if I was barefoot. I stood up and looked around once more. I noticed a mirror on the wall on the left. I saw myself.
My hair was a little messy as always, but it was what suited me. My eyes were blue and lively, I was relaxed but energetic. The cuts on my chin and next to my right eye weren't visible. Is this really some kind of afterlife, where injuries don't show? I was curious. But it wasn't a stressing kind of inquisitiveness. It was like if I was a child who needs to find the treasure. No rush and no expectations. No pressure. I walked to the door slowly to open it up. I touched the handle and pushed it down.
I stepped into another room. A woman was sitting at a table with her back facing me. Her hair was in braids and she was writing something. Maybe drawing. The room was just as white as the other. I looked behind me only to see that there was no door there anymore. I walked up to the woman to call her.
"Sorry, miss...could you help me?" - I asked as I stepped closer. She didn't answer. - "I was wondering...where are we exactly?" - she turned around to face me. I felt my eyes widen as I looked at her.
"Vieni qui, piccola mia!" (Come here, little one.)
"Mamma?" - I asked as I felt tears forming in my eyes as she nodded, smiling brightly. Her brown eyes showed the love and caring I missed so much in these past years. She got up and came up to me, cupping my face in her hands.
I grabbed her hands on my cheeks when she wiped the tears streaming down from my eyes. She looked exactly as I remembered. She was smaller than me, with maybe thirty centimetres, but she was the greatest person I've ever came across in my life.
"Hi there, little one..." - she wishpered as I cried silently under her touch. - "I missed you so-so much." - she said when she pulled me down to put her forehead on mine.
"M-me too mom, me too." - I told her sniffling, trying to stop myself from crying.
"Don't hold back your tears, little one. You haven't cried in years. You deserve to let out your emotions." - She caressed my back, the way only she could do it. I inhaled her scent, the one that made our family house home, the one that smelled like raspberry and freshly baked pancake.
"What are you writing, mom?"- I asked when I calmed down and let go of her, wiping my nose. She laughed at my question, from the bottom of her heart, even more when I looked at her in confusion.
"You still want to know everything, don't you, Anne?" - she asked finally smiling as she sat down, signalling me to sit on the other chair across her. I nodded at her as I settled down. - "I'm writing to your sister."
"My sister?" - I asked in disbelief.
"Yes. I'm writing to Ree." - she saw how confounded I was but she didn't continue.
"Why are you writing to her?" - I wasn't angry at my sister. The presence of my mother and her calmness made me sure that it was nothing to be upset about.
"Because, she needs her mother now the most." - she told me, watching me intently. - "Well, not now, since, now you're the one here with me." - she lifted the paper which disappeared as if it was some kind of magic trick.
"She was here before?" - I asked her, still looking at the former place of the paper.
"No, she wasn't. Unfortunately, she will never step into this room." - she answered, reaching out for my hand to hold it.
"This room. What is this room exactly?" - I asked, now knowing that I will receive an answer.
"You tell me. What do you see?" - she questioned back.
"Well, you of course. And a table with two chair. And the door behind me." - she nodded.
"That's where we are."
"But that doesn't make an-"
"Sometimes things aren't meant to make sense, little one." - she cutted in. - "It's your decision where we are. For some reason, you chose this place." - I was confused for sure, but strangely it wasn't frustrating.
"Where is dad?" - I asked the question that was roaming in my mind since the minute I realised it was my mom in here. - "He can't be here neither? Like Ree?" - she shook her head.
"He is dead, little one." - she told me smiling sadly.
"But...you died too. This is some kind of afterlife isn't it?" - don't tell me my mom is a zombie.
"This is definitely not an afterlife kind of thing, Anne. And yes, of course I died too." - she was smiling with her eyes, just like she always did.
"Then, I-I don't understand." - what is happening? I thought I was going to get some answers or information from her, but she just confuses me more.
"We are here, Anne." - she said as she pointed at my forehead.
"My mind you mean?"
"Exactly. He's not here. You eraesed him from there." - I shook my head.
"I didn't. I love him and I remember him, I-" - she brought her finger to my chest.
"This, and your brain is not the same thing. He vanished from your brain, because you couldn't understand him. You still remember him. You still love him. You could never understand the fact that someone would be able to give his life for his loved one." - she didn't seem mad at me.Her voice was soothing and delicate, just like in real life. - "Maybe after now, you know what it means to sacrafize for the woman you love."
"You know about Tzuyu?" - I asked.
"Of course I do. She talks to me sometimes."
"Like this?" - she laughed sweetly.
"No honey. I can't answer her unfortunately. She talks a lot, when she falls asleep next to you. She always thanks me for bringing you to life." - I felt my heart ache. Not from pain but from love.
"She really does that?" - she nodded as I felt tears forming in my eyes once again. - "Mom...why are you here and not my soul? I love you just as much as I love Dad." - she smiled at me.
"Of course you do. I am in your soul too. Who said people can't be in two places at the same time, little one?" - she caressed my face slowly.
"Then Ree...you say she doesn't have the chance to step in here. Why?" - I asked her, even if I couldn't understand her answers, I think I would have a lifetime to think about them. - "Is it because she's alive?"
"Your sister's not alive. That's why I wrote a letter to her. You don't understand her...why she did what she did, so she will never came here. Just like your father." - she answered.
"I'm sorry mom..." - I felt crying taking over me once again. - "Your daughter died because of me."- she caressed my head it fell forward to the table.
"It's not your fault, Anne. She chose her faith. And you did too. You still do. That's why you'll never understand her." - I lifted my head as I looked up at her.
"I don't have options to choose from now. I'm stuck here." - she laughed at me.
"Stuck? There is always a choice, little one. Right now, you could choose to open that door and walk out. In this reality, there are no injuries, no anger and no pain." - she explained.
"It sounds like a perfect world, so why would I walk out on that door?" - I asked her which made her smile again. That one smile that only mothers can master. That smile that tells they know everything about you.
"Right. What is that you have out there, in the real world, which you don't have here?"
"Tzuyu..." - I mumbled. - "There is no Tzuyu here, right?" -she nodded.
"Right. No Tzuyu. No anyone who lives. They're out there." - she said pointing to the ceiling.
"So people, whom I can meet here are...dead. But you can meet Dad right?" - I asked her in anticipation.
"Of course. I meet him every day. He loves you. And he is proud of you." - she told me with a smile.
"Really?" - I asked, grinning widely. - And mom..." - I started hesitating.
"Yes, little one?"
"Ree...what happened to her? I mean I know that she can't be here, but you can meet her too, right? Even if she's dead."- she laughed once again at my question.
"I'm not God itself, honey. Your sister made mistakes. Huge mistakes. Which don't make her a bad person. These mistakes guarantee opportunities for her to fix them. But until then, she will have to endure the pain of being alone. The pain that she caused to Petra and Tzuyu. She took away their loved ones. Until she makes up for these mistakes, she won't be able to meet your father and I. And she won't be able to watch over her sisters and brothers." - I nodded slowly. It actually made sense.
"And if I decide to stay here. And not go back...what will happen?" - I asked carefully.
"That door. Doesn't exactly leads back to the reality you call life." - I waited for to continue, but she didn't.
"So where can I get from here?" - she shook her head, smiling.
"I can't tell you that. If you're not satisfied with the things you have here...you can go on. But if you're, you can stay here. It's up to you."
"Can you come with me?" - I asked, even if I knew the answer.
"No, little one, I can't. This is the place where I belong." - I nodded.
"But mom...if this all is happening in my mind...then am I only imagining what you would tell me now?" - she stood up and pulled me to stand too.
"Not even you have that strong of an imagination." - she said as she adjusted my T-shirt. - "Now go, little one. I'm not the one you need the most in your life. You grew up. You became the woman, whom you were meant to be." - I held her close once more.
"You won't be sad if I leave, will you?" - she pulled me down to kiss my forehead before she answered.
"As I said...in this reality, we don't feel sadness or anger." - I smiled at her as I opened the door.
"Arrivederci, Mamma!" - she intertwined her hands in front of herself as she nodded, looking after me as I stepped out.
As I closed the door the clean white light went out. Only little lamps ignited next to me. It wasn't shining white like the other two room, but dim, and mysterious. I had to wait for a few minutes until my eyes adjusted the change. There were two swings in the middle, one was occupied, but the other was waiting for me. I went there and sat down on it. The man who sat there didn't show his face.
"Are you my dad?" - I asked the first question that came into my mind.
"I'm a dad. But not yours." - he answered. His voice was soft and deep, and his accent was like Tzuyu's.
"Who are you?" - he turned around a little to show himself to me. He was holding a baby in his arms.
"Chen?" - I asked as I recognized Luca in his arms. His face looked like Tzuyu's only with sharper jawline and stubble.
"It's me." - he answered quietely. - "I'm glad you decided to talk to me now." - he told me as he put Luca down on the ground, to sleep.
"I don't exactly decide this, I guess."
"You do. And I know why." - I didn't understand him. I didn't say anything, waiting for him to continue. - "You wanted to meet Tzuyu's family."
"And the others?" - I asked.
"Mom and Dad?" - he smiled in front of himself. - "They have nothing to do in your soul."
"So this is my soul?" - he nodded.
"You don't like to think about her parents, do you?" - I shook my head.
"No. It makes me angry. They hurt her."
"They did. But we did too." - I looked at him in confusion. - "Not with our fist. But our words and actions. You see, I was going to go after her to Korea." - he spoke quietely, but I could understand everything.
"Why didn't you?" - I asked as I started to swing a little.
"I decided not to. I went to the U.S. instead. I wanted a better life. And I left her for it." - he sighed. I should be angry, shouldn't I? I should punch him. But I didn't want to.
"Did you get your better life?" - I asked him.
"Yes. For a few months." - he looked at Luca lovingly. - "Less than one year ago I was the happiest man on earth. With Petra and the thought of us, having a baby together. We were going to be fine. Until your sister found out about us. She took it well, at least we thought. She offered me a job at the docks. As a security. I didn't understand why I had to be in full black one day. She sent me to kill you...AV. She made the same mistake you did." - he laughed silently.
"She wanted you to take me out there, because she thought I was doing drug business?" - I asked in disbelief.
"Crazy, isn't it? I could've killed you, y'know?" - he asked stealing a glance. - "I noticed that you came across me. After I ran back for the money...I needed it you know, for the better life I imagined for my family." - I nodded. - "When I saw you...I didn't know you were dating my sister. I didn't know you saved her. But something inside me told me not to kill you."
"Well, I'm glad you didn't." - he laughed with me. I gripped the chain of the swing harder. - "Do you think I'm good enough for her?" - I wasn't speaking loudly.
"I can't imagine better. But don't hurt her." - he said. - "She is hurting now, because of you, you know?"
"How could I hurt her when I'm here?" - he pointed up at the ceiling.
"Her pulse is down to thirty!" - we heard from up there.
"Who are they?" - I asked, looking up.
"They're fighting for your life." - he answered.
"Still no pupil reflex!" - we heard again, now louder.
"I need to thank you for taking care of her and Luca. Also I want to ask you to look out for Petra for me." - he said and I nodded.
"Of course."
"But if you want to go back you need to go now." - he told me standing up. - "She is waiting for you. Look." - he pointed at the wall next to us.
I saw the surgery room and my body lying there, I also saw Tzuyu on the other side of the wall, fighting the nurses, who tried to keep her back.
"I need to see her, you have to save her, let me in there, I want to be with her..." - I felt my heart sink at her tear-streamed face and red eyes.
"We're losing her!" - I heard the surgeon, at the same time Tzuyu screamed from the top of her lungs as she collapsed on the floor, not trying to fight anymore.
"Go now, if you want to." - he told me pointing at the door. - "And Anne..." - he started when I grabbed the handle. - "Don't let her go." - I nodded as I stepped out.
I felt my body falling. There was nothing under me. Am I being fooled? There was no ground under me, as I fell deeper and deeper. In my ear, I heard a loud beeping sound which became louder and louder to the point that it was hurting my ears. I gritted my teeth when I felt pain in my whole body. I couldn't breathe properly. I was still falling. The sound was unbearable now. I heard a loud snap and everything went black.