Jessi
"Hiya Love, can I talk to you for a second?" Des smiled, his fingers hooking in my elbow as he pulled me towards Anne and Robin's empty Dining Room.
"Sure." I smiled, curious what he wanted me for. "Oh, I've been listening to The Runaways, you were right, they're awesome."
"That's cool. Listen, you know what it's like to come from a broken home, right?" He looked me straight in the eye and I just stood there, blinking rapidly, the previous conversation falling from my head as my brain tried to grasp what the hell he was talking about.
"You mean because I don't know my biological Dad? Or do you mean because I have no family because my Mum's dead?" I swallowed hard, she was always on my mind at Christmas time, it was her favourite time of the year. She always had the tree up on the first of December and she'd leave it up for as long as she could, without incurring the bad luck of leaving it up past the 6th of January. My job was always to put the Angel on the top of the tree. Anne had a star on top of her tree, I missed my Angel.
"Well, the first one. Shit! I forgot about your Mum, you wouldn't do anything stupid like that, would you?" Des continued to stare at me as if he was appraising me for some unknown job.
"What is this about? Why are you asking me these things?" I wanted to leave but my feet wouldn't move, I felt like they were sinking into the floor, pulling the rest of my body down with them. I didn't think of my family as being broken, sure I only had a Mum but we weren't broken, we were happy, weren't we? Maybe I was just delusional? Maybe we were always broken? Maybe that's why she was able to leave me? Maybe I was a giant fucking curse, everyone I love doomed to leave me? I grabbed for the table as I felt light-headed but I missed and it felt like I was falling in slow motion, the edge of the table heading towards me but there was nothing I could do to stop it, my limbs wouldn't move fast enough. The sound of my head smacking the wood echoed in my ears as my body tangled in a fallen chair and then everything went black.
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Harry
The clatter followed by a thump woke me from my nap but assuming one of the cats had knocked something over I didn't pay much attention. I searched the room for Jessi but noticed she was missing along with my Dad. "Anne! Can you come here a second?" My Dad's voice called out from the Dining Room.
"How was your nap?" Gem nudged me. "Good." I yawned, stretching out my arms and legs. A nap was just what I'd needed after all the indulgence of yesterday and today. "A Boxing Day nap is becoming your tradition, you're such an old man!" Gem teased.
"Shut up! You're older than me." I bumped her with my leg.
"Yeah, well, I didn't have to go for a nap!" She laughed.
"Harry! Can you come here a minute, please?" My Mum's voice interrupted our squabbling, and I sighed. My limbs were still sleepy, I didn't feel like helping with whatever she needed me for, I was comfortable here. I looked up to see her whisper something in Robin's ear, he nodded quickly and then disappeared into the kitchen with his phone. What are they up to? "Harry?" My Mum repeated, the stern look on her face forced my body up off the sofa.
"Fine, what do you need me for?" I groaned following her into the Dining Room. My Dad was stood there like a statue staring at the floor.
"Now, don't panic. She'll be fine!" My Mum's hand wrapped around my wrist. What the hell was she talking about? Who would be fine? But then I looked at my Dad more closely, to the spot on the floor where his eyes seemed to be glued, all I could see from here were Jessi's feet, clad in her fluffy Platform 9 3/4 socks she'd gotten for Christmas.
"What do you mean, she's going to be fine?" My feet carried me towards the other end of the table where I found Jess on her side, she looked like she was sleeping but her hair looked wet, why was her hair wet? I knelt down beside her and brushed my hands through her hair, why was this crazy girl sleeping on the Dining Room floor?
"Careful, Harry!" My Mum spoke softly as she crouched down beside me, moving my hand out of the way and placing a damp cloth there instead.
"Is she breathing?" Robin poked his head in the door, my eyes shot towards him as he held the phone to his ear. Of course she was breathing, she was just asleep. My eyes glanced back to Jess and the white cloth my Mum was holding to her head, it was slowly changing colour to a bright red. I held up my hand that had been in her hair, my fingers the same red colour that was staining the cloth.
"Yes, she's breathing. Her head is bleeding pretty badly and she won't wake up." My Mum said calmly. I stood up to move to Jessi's other side, I needed to see her face. Nothing was making sense. My brain hurt as I struggled to process all the information. "Des?" My Mum called, but he didn't answer. "Harry, can you hold this here while I go get another one?" My hand reached out and carefully pressed the cloth to her head before my mouth had uttered the word yes. "Bloody hell, Des! Do something! Your son needs you." My Mum sighed exasperatedly as she rushed out the room.
"What happened?" I asked as I looked over her body, she really did just look like she was asleep, no other visible scraps or bruises and even as I lifted the cloth, I couldn't see where she was bleeding. I pressed it back down on the spot my Mum had it, hoping I was holding it in the right place.
"She fell over." My Dad said, his hand patting my head, timidly, the same way you'd approach a snarling dog. His fingers barely touching me, as if he might have to pull his hand back in a swift retreat. It made me suspicious. As plausible as it was that my adorably clumsy girlfriend tripped over her own feet or a non-existent crack in the floor, I didn't believe that was what happened here.
"Mum, I don't think this is slowing." I said as she crouched down beside me. The white cloth was now almost entirely red. The sight of Jessi's blood making me want to squeeze the cloth out and somehow force it back into her body.
"It will, Harry. Don't worry. The ambulance will be here soon and they'll give her something to stop the bleeding." My Mum squeezed my hand as she switched the cloth in my hand for a clean one.
"How? I mean, look at her, she's not - how is she supposed to-"
"Hey, it's okay, she doesn't need to be awake, they can inject it straight in. Why don't you pack her some things for the hospital? Some pyjama's and toiletries, some things you think she'll like to have with her?" I shook my head, I didn't want to leave her.
"Hey, come on now. You know she'd like some clean clothes when she wakes up and I don't think I should be rooting around in her personal things." My Mum encouraged, and I reluctantly got up to do what she asked. It's not like I could be much use here, anyway.
My feet sounded heavy as they climbed their way upstairs, the house seemed unnaturally quiet. I walked into my childhood bedroom, where Jess and I had been sleeping, and rummaged around in Jessi's bag, she never wore pyjamas so I packed two of my t-shirts and a pair of loose fitting sweatpants she used for travelling. I flung in her toiletry bag and then I wracked my brain, trying to think of what else she might like? I found her earphones and her phone which had been charging on the bedside table and tossed them into the bag. What else? I opened up my holdall and retrieved Bob from the bottom; he travelled everywhere with me now. He helped me sleep when Jess wasn't there but I figured she might like him back, just until she was better. I lay him down flat on top of the pile and carefully folded in his arms and legs so I could close the bag.
"Harry! The ambulance is here." Robin yelled up the stairs, and I grabbed the bag and rushed down the stairs as fast as my legs would carry me.
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"What's taking them so long?" I huffed as I paced back and forwards in the hallway.
"Harry, sit down. She's only been in there for fifteen minutes, they said it could take up to an hour." My Mum grabbed my arm but I couldn't sit down, I couldn't stay still. They'd taken her for an emergency CT Scan and I couldn't relax. I hadn't heard her voice, seen her beautiful eyes since dinner, when I fell asleep. When she'd started to come round in the ambulance, they'd sedated her, her head strapped down to the stretcher, they were worried about internal brain injury so almost as soon as we arrived they rushed her in here for a CT Scan.
"Please, sit down, Sweetheart. You're making me anxious." My Mum pleaded, so I reluctantly sat down in the chair. "What did the Nurse give you?" My leg bounced erratically as she spoke.
"They're Jessi's." I said as I held out my hand and unclenched my fist which had been holding the simple chord bracelets which were some of my girlfriends most prized possessions.
"Is that a sun and a moon?" Her voice was soft as she brushed over the Gold sun charm which hung from the sky blue chord and then the Silver moon charm which adorned the grey chord.
"Yeah. Her Mum bought her them. The sun when they moved to New York and the Moon when she graduated High School. There's a third one which has a star which her Mum was supposed to buy her when she graduated next year."
"That's sweet. Maybe you could get the last one for her?" My Mum smiled before scooping them out of my hand.
"Thought about it but I don't know, it's supposed to be her Mum's thing, apparently she used to tell Jess she loved her more than there are suns, moons and stars in the sky."
"Well, I can't speak for Jessi but I know as a mother I would appreciate somebody finding the missing one for you or your sister." My Mum spoke softly as she slid the bracelets onto my wrist and pulled the chord fastenings tight. "You should keep these safe."
"Here they are!" Gemma's voice shattered the quiet of the hallway as she came bounding towards us. Robin and my Dad close behind her.
"I think we've been walking in circles for the last half an hour." Robin said as he gestured for Gem to sit down in the only other seat.
"How is she?" My Dad asked, and I shrugged my shoulders.
"She'll be fine, Harry. She's tough that little one." Gem hugged me tightly just as somebody I assume was a Doctor crashed through the door.
"Are you Mum?" He stared at my Mum, ignoring the rest of us completely. My Mum shook her head, so he turned to Robin and my Dad. "Dad? Dads?" When they shook their heads too, he sighed exasperatedly. "Well, where are her parents?"
"She's mine." I snapped at him.
"Husband?" I shook my head. "Is anyone here her family?" He sighed.
"Yes." We all replied. "I told you she's mine, she's my girlfriend. I'm her next of kin, her emergency contact. We live together. She's my family, my future, she's everything to me. So we're not her blood relatives, who cares? We're the people who brought her here, the people who love her so please just stop asking stupid questions and tell me if she will be okay?" I stood up, so I was standing in front of him, perfectly ready to move him out of my way if needs be.
"Come with me." He beckoned me through the door as they wheeled Jess out of the room with the scanner. "I'm Dr. Adams, the radiologist."
"Where are they taking her?" I stepped in front of them to stop them taking Jess away from me.
"They are taking her up to Ward 7, a nurse will come and clean her up and stitch her head wound. She's going to be okay, she has a slight concussion but apart from that a clean bill of health." The Radiologist said but my eyes were glued on Jessi, she looked so small and helpless. There was blood dried into her forehead, her hair was matted together and her Christmas t-shirt had been cut open so they could connect her up to the heart monitor and other machines in the ambulance. They'd attached an IV needle to the back of her hand which had slid off the stretcher. Something which the Porter in charge of transporting Jessi to Ward 7 had failed to notice.
"Can I go with her?" I asked as I took her hand and sat it back on the stretcher, pulling the sheet up to her chest to hide her exposed skin.
"Yes. I'll have the Doctor in charge of Ward 7 come and talk to you." The Radiologist said as I held onto Jessi's hand, squeezing it tight, hoping she'd squeeze it back.
-----
"Uhm... excuse me? Hi!" I smiled as the woman behind the desk glanced up at me, her eyes widening in surprise.
"You're - holy shit! You're Harry Styles!" She gasped.
"Shh... don't tell anyone." I forced a smile.
"Oh My God! I love you! And I loved your outfit on the X Factor, don't listen to the people who said you look like curtains!" She said all in one breath.
"Thank you. Do you think you could help me with something? Rachael?" I smiled, reading her name badge.
"Yes. What do you need?" She stood up from her desk.
"Could you find me a bowl I could put hot water in and bring it to that room along there? Room 5, I think?"
"Yes, I think I can actually. Molly brought in a trifle in a pyrex dish the other day. I'll just go get it." And she scarpered off without another word.
"Harry! The Doctor said a Nurse would come and do this." My Mum protested once I got back to the room.
"Yeah but when? She's already been waiting here for over an hour and I can't just sit here and do nothing. I need to do something." I pulled the curtain around her bed and unbuttoned her jeans, carefully pulling them off, the sweatpants slid on easily enough until I got to her ass, I carefully rolled her onto her side and pulled up one side before doing the same thing for the other side. I glanced at her torn t-shirt and decided it was beyond saving so I ripped it in half.
"Harry? What was that?" Gem asked as I slid her arms out of the material.
"Just Jessi's old t-shirt. It's fine. Shit! I forgot to bring her a bra." I pouted as I scooped her up and placed the t-shirt carefully over her head, god she was unwieldy, they reckoned she'd be out until morning. I balanced her against my chest so I could use both my hands to place her arms in the sleeves, maybe a shirt would have been easier?
"We can bring her more things later, don't worry about it." My Mum's voice said as I lay Jess down in the bed. She already looked much better, now where was Rachael with that bowl?
"Harry?" She knocked on the door right on cue. I swung open the curtain as I yelled for her to come in. "Oh crap! Anne's here and Gemma!" She paused in the doorway. "Is Jessi here? I love her. She's so funny and Severus is so cute!" I pointed to the name chart on the end of the bed.
"Oh shoot! Is she okay?"
"She's going to be fine. Now, if you could get that through my son's thick skull then I'd be eternally grateful." My Mum chuckled.
"She's in good hands here, Harry." Rachael smiled. "What do you need the bowl for?"
"I wanna clean her hair." I hooked my hand around her arm and pulled her towards the bed.
"Oh yeah. I can see why you'd want to do that. Has nobody come to see her?" Rachael asked.
"No, and the Doctor says once she gets her stitches in she shouldn't get them wet for at least 24 hours. I don't want her to be all bloody."
"Listen, Harry. I've got to get back to the desk but I promise I'll get somebody to come and help you with this before Jessi has to get her stitches. If nobody has been within half an hour, you come tell me, okay?" She placed the bowl down on the bed.
"We will. Thank you, Love." My Mum answered as I got to work filling the bowl with warm water. I sat it down on the food table and got the face cloths I knew Jess kept in her toiletry bag. "Harry?"
"Just leave him, Mum. You won't stop him. Besides, I'm on his side, it's ridiculous that she's been left here like this, she shouldn't have to lie there with blood matted to her hair, they shouldn't have pumped her full of enough drugs so she'd be passed out until morning. And what happens to her shouldn't be all on Harry's shoulders, she should be able to have a say in what they do to her. I wanna talk to her, I want her to tell us we're all fussing about nothing. This is bullshit!" Gem ranted.
"Hey, what's happened?" Robin asked as I heard the door open. I tried to block them all out, it all just sounded like noise, aggravating noise. I slid the cloth along Jessi's hair but nothing seemed to be changing, the blood just seemed to seep into more of her hair. I cleaned the cloth and wiped the smears of blood from her forehead, happy that I could see some progress.
"Harry? Son? What are you doing?" My Dad asked, pulling my hands away from her.
"I'm trying to fix her." I snapped, pulling my hands from his.
"Yeah, well, you can't." He snapped back and my eyes shot towards him. "Look, now she's just as bloody as before, her t-shirt and the sheets are wet and look at you." He turned my bright red palms up to face me and I felt the tears I'd been holding back all afternoon roll down my cheeks and now the dam had burst there was no stopping it. I let myself be pulled into a hug, my head resting on his shoulder as I completely lost control.
-----
Jessi's fingers twitching woke me from my restless sleep. A glance at my watch told me it was 3am. Everyone else had gone home to get some rest but I couldn't leave her. I lifted my head from where it rested against Jessi's mattress as she mumbled incoherently. "Shh... it's okay, baby." I said as I stroked her arm, trying to settle her back down again.
"Harry?" My eyes snapped to hers but they were still closed, and even her mumbling had stopped. Christ! Maybe I'd imagined it, through lack of sleep. I placed my head back down on the mattress as she mumbled, "you shouldn't love me." My eyes snapped to hers again, and I shook her wrist, trying to wake her up.
"What the hell does that mean?" I sighed. "Jessi?" I shook her some more but nothing. What the hell was that about? Why would she say that? I stood up and paced around the small hospital room, unable to switch my brain off.
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Jessi
I opened my eyes slowly, the bright lights above my head, forcing them closed again. My head hurt like hell, my fingers brushing over something bumpy as they reached the spot which hurt the most. I opened my eyes again and looked around the room. Why was I in the hospital?
"Harry?" My voice cracked, my throat was dry as a bone. I swallowed and then tried again. "Harry?" He was asleep on a chair in the corner, he looked uncomfortable. I stretched to reach the jug of water that was on the table but ended up sending it crashing to the floor.
"Jessi? Fuck! What are you doing?" Harry flew out of the chair and rushed towards me.
"I'm thirsty. Sorry. I didn't mean to wake you." Harry bent over and then handed me a bottle of water.
"I've been waiting for you to wake up all night, don't move, okay?" I took a massive gulp of water before I spoke again.
"Why am I here?" I asked.
"You fell, bumped your head on the Dining Table. Scared the shit out of all of us. You had to get stitches." Harry said, his fingers gripping my arm tightly. A smile crossed my lips as I spotted my bracelets strapped securely around his wrist, I wasn't sure why he had them but the sight of them there made me feel contented.
"Sorry. Is everyone okay?" I felt like such an idiot, why did I have to be so clumsy?
"Don't be sorry. Everyone's fine. They went home to get some sleep, they'll be back soon. I didn't want to leave - wanted to make sure you were OK. I wanted to hear your voice." Harry said quietly.
"Well, then I'm very sorry it sounds like shit." I laughed which tickled my throat and made me cough.
"I kinda like it, it's sexy. You want some more water?" Harry smiled, and I finished the bottle of water.
"Wanna cuddle?" I smiled as I scooted over to make some space in the bed.
"Of course." His dimple popped as he climbed into the bed beside me. "You mean the world to me, you know that right?" His strong arms wrapped around me and he pulled me onto his chest.
"Uh huh. You mean the world to me too." My fingers brushed over his tummy, where his butterfly tattoo would be.
"Don't ever forget that, okay?" Harry squeezed me tight as I glanced up at him.
"You okay?" I asked.
"Perfect." He kissed my head softly and his breathing slowed to a steady rhythm, he must be exhausted after spending the night in that uncomfortable chair. The fact that he'd stayed here anyway made me feel cherished, and that feeling made my heart warm.