-(It's been 3 weeks since O/n has tried to get you smile your biggest smile)-
Gosh, I really don't feel like coming to school today. I sat on the bench alone as it was only 7:00 and school started at 8. Plenty of time to reconsider my life choices. Swinging my legs, I go on YouTube and search up lofi music. People usually didn't like that stuff but I enjoyed it because it seemed relaxing. Apparently, it was the music that people would get high to?? I don't think that is true but I guess in some cases I could see that??
I suddenly felt lonely. The courtyard was filled with ducks that stood on one foot and mated like the world would end tomorrow. Even ducks are getting it better than I am. I wonder what it's like to hold someone's hand and play with their hair until they fell asleep.
I never really realized how lonely it felt in the school courtyard at that moment. I never really did mind being alone for a long time, it's basically what my whole childhood was like, but this morning, it just felt suffocating. My throat tightened and tears gushed from my eyes. Damn, crying at school.
I was about to wipe my tears with my sleeve of my jacket when something, or someone, slammed into my back. "Ack." I was taken off guard and was utterly confused. "Ah...hello?" I sniffed and smelt a familiar scent. O/n.
"Are you okay?" She mumbles into my ear and sent shivers down my spine. She jumped over the bench and landed sitting but quickly moved to where she kneeled infront of me. Cradling my face, she looked at me with concerning eyes and wiped my tears away with her thumbs. "What's wrong, Y/n?" Ah. Just the way she says my name, touches me, and looks at me with those kind eyes...
"I...I'm fine." I stare down into my lap and play with my fingers. O/n takes my hands into hers when she notices my fidgeting and looks up at me.
"I'm going to hug you okay?" She looks for a sign to do so and I nod. Quickly, she embraces me in a tight hug and held onto me. Her scent wafting infront of me, I wrap my arms around her too. I started to cry again. Being held feels so nice. I want to stay like this forever. O/n takes a deep breath and rubs my back lovingly. I'm not worthy of this treatment. I don't deserve this.
On the other side of campus, I see O/n's boyfriend get out of his car. Thinking that O/n would soon run to him, I push her back a bit and distanced ourselves. My hearted ached as O/n looked a bit surprised and hurt by my actions but I knew she would leave me anyways.
"Uhm...your boyfriend is here now. You can go to him. I mean, if you want. But you don't have to, I'm just saying that-"
"Ex." She interrupted me.
"Ex?" I replied back in confusion. "You guys broke up?" I could see the sadness in her eyes as she slowly nodded. "Why? You guys got along so well..." she only sighed and sat beside me on the bench.
"Well, he kept on taking people's jokes too seriously. Like, those jokes when you lightly insult your friends and stuff?" I nodded, encouraging her to continue. "He was starting to give lots of my friends trouble just because I'm his girlfriend. So in order to spare the people and my friends, I broke up with him."
I looked down at her hand in the bench and laced my pinky around her's. "You're brave. Doing that just for the people around you." I swing my legs back and forth. "I'm too shy to even interact with people outside of my friend group. But I guess meeting you kinda expanded my bubble a bit so I'm thankful for that." I could feel her stare on me but being as shy as I am, I didn't meet her gaze and looked down at my lap.
"There is also another reason I broke up with him." She started and held my hand in her's. "I fell in love with you...." my head snaps towards her direction as my mouth is left open in disbelief. She....fell in love? With me?! "I'm sorry I just- I shouldn't have said that" she let go of my hand and it was left cold without her warmth. "I just....After saying that I wanted to make you smile your biggest smile, I just couldn't stop thinking about wanting to make you smile all the time." She blushed a deep red and folded her hands in her lap. "I ended up falling for you....I'm sorry if this grosses you out." Within my disbelief she had already gotten up and walked around the bench to grab her backpack she dropped before she hugged me. Panicking I didn't move, afraid I would make her drift away even more. "I won't bother you again after this. I'm really sorry-" Thinking of the best way to shut her mouth and tell her I felt the same, I turned around and kissed her on the cheek.
She physically paused and stared wide eyes at me. "Did you just...?"
"Yeah...I love you too.... Have for a long time actually." I turned so I was facing the front now and blushed my ears off.
"I-... You missed." I hear her whisper near my ear and I feel her arms wrapping around my shoulders from behind.
"Does he know about...this?" I received a nip at the nape of my neck as she had moved my hair from blocking it. Then I heard a muffled 'mmhmm'. I sighed. "Then let me test my aim again."
I turned my head to the side and O/n leaned over my shoulder to capture my lips in hers. The whole zoo was released into my stomach as fireworks were lit under my eyelids. I reach beside me and caressed her jaw as I smiled idiotically into the kiss. Unable to stop myself, I cried and pulled away, overwhelmed with so much happiness.
"Im so happy, O/n..." I wipe my tears a since again, she jumped over the bench to sit next to me, this time, embracing me and putting her hand on the back of my head, leading me face into her shoulder for me to cry on.
"I'm so happy too." I could hear her choke on her words as she cried as well.
"I didn't see your biggest smile but I sure as hell felt it."