I moved my thumb in concentric circles on Ethan's back, trying to ignore the seeping warmth of his drool pooling on my shirt just beneath my collar bone.
Despite the tension in the room, the activity within it was notably mundane. I held a book in the other hand—that I wasn't reading—with my legs on Jasper's lap, who was using them as a makeshift table for his sketchbook. He'd taken to drawing as a distraction from the emotional environment, stealing the book from Alice, who apparently used to use it when she had particularly vivid visions. He'd started off just drawing household objects and the various little trinkets that Esme placed around the house but moved on to people. He was in the midst of a depiction of Emmett, where he lay on his back on the floor, tossing a baseball up into the air and catching it with the other hand.
Bella was stuck in a cycle of lurching forward to gag over a bucket and sagging back down onto the couch with a rattling exhale. Edward hovered at the arm of the sofa, trying to coax her into drinking some water each time she unleashed the contents of her stomach. We hadn't spoken since the argument in the kitchen, but I was fine with that. The fact that the dislike was mutual had been explicitly confirmed, so I no longer worried about his opinion. It had taken a lot of mediation from Alice to get Jasper to calm down afterward, as he was almost as riled as I had been.
Carlisle continued to read and research, but to no avail. Esme buzzed about trying to look after everyone, making food for the wolves and I—Jake, Leah and Seth were posted at different lookout points around the house. I hadn't spoken to Paul, either. Or Jared. I still had the instinct to reach for my phone and tap out a message to them when the house was particularly silent, but I resisted. If they were willing to murder my friend, and her unborn child, they weren't the people I thought they were.
Leah wouldn't speak to me. I didn't mind—we'd never really spoken even when I was still seeing Sam's pack. She seemed the type to keep to herself, and was honestly rather intimidating, so I didn't approach.
"Are you cold?" Edward asked Bella, voice soft.
She was buried in blankets, but still nodded.
"I got it," Jake grunted, shuffling down the sofa toward her from where he'd been taking a nap and pulling her into his body.
There was a bout of quiet, and I went back to the book that I wasn't reading.
"Don't do that."
I looked up.
"What?" Bella croaked.
"Smile like I'm your favourite person in the world."
"You're one of them."
I flinched. If she kept talking like that, he was never going to get over her.
She sighed. "It feels complete when you're here, Jake."
I almost threw the book at her.
Jasper looked up from his sketch and met my eyes for a fraction of a second. The tension in my stomach eased in an instant, and I pressed my lips together, raising an eyebrow in his direction. He shouldn't have been wasting energy on my emotions—he had far too many to deal with already. He went back to his drawing.
Bella let out a groan and pushed herself upright, holding a hand to her ballooned stomach. Edward grabbed the bucket again and held it under her chin, but she didn't appear to need it. She whimpered and shook for a moment, but then subdued.
"We need to find a way to get some food into her system," Esme murmured, eyes jumping between Bella and Carlisle.
Alice shook her head. "If only I could see the foetus-
"Baby," Rosalie corrected.
"-maybe I could figure out what it wants."
I shut my book and placed it on the coffee table, holding Ethan's head so not to jostle him too much.
"I think you might be right."
Everyone's attention turned to Edward as he conversed with the empty air.
"Jacob just had an idea," he said in explanation.
Jake sighed. "It wasn't an idea. It was a snide comment."
"What were you thinking?" Carlisle asked.
"That's it's probably just looking for someone to sink its teeth into."
Bella lifted her head. "He's thirsty."
"I know the feeling," Emmett grumbled to himself.
"If it's craving, it's not going to want animal blood."
There was a pause.
"I have some O-negative laid aside for Bella," Carlisle said, rising from his seat to move across the room.
I watched him go, mildly baffled, before looking at Jasper. His jaw had locked, and his eyes were fixated on Bella, darkening by the second. The pencil he'd been using to draw had practically been ground to sawdust in his granite palm.
"Do you want to help me put Ethan down, Jazz?" I asked, slowly manoeuvring myself up and off the couch without waking Ethan up. He didn't respond for a few moments, but the second my hand came into contact with his shoulder, his eyes snapped back into focus.
"Good idea," he said softly, shutting the sketchbook with a snap.
Neither of us looked over our shoulders as we left the room. I didn't want to see Bella drinking blood—even just the idea was a little nauseating—and if Jasper had tried to stay in that room, he would have been torturing himself. He would still be in pain within a ten-mile radius, but at least brick and plaster and floorboard provided a physical barrier that would give appropriate warning for his approach, should things go south.
We settled Ethan in his crib beside the bed in Alice's room. He went down rather easily, still in the midst of his nap. I shut the door behind us with a soft click, baby monitor in hand, and followed Jasper—who was still silent—toward the balcony.
It was a cool night, but not chill. The view would have been marvellous—rich green pine trees, crystalline twinkling stars in an inky sky—if it weren't warped by suspicion. We knew that the wolves were skulking around in the trees, watching us with yellow eyes and bared teeth.
I slid a hand around Jasper's waist and rested my chin on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"
He didn't answer for a few moments. "I don't know how long we can keep this up?"
I jolted backward as if I'd been stung. "Keep what up?"
He seemed confused by my panic, before mild humour overtook his features. "I don't mean our relationship, idiot."
"Oh, well, sorry for being confused by your incredibly vague and cryptic statement," I huffed, fizzing with silent relief.
He smiled and shook his head, gently grabbing my hip and tugging me into his side before kissing my head. "I meant the way we're all living. Not hunting, cooped up in this house, constantly on edge..."
I melted into him, relishing the solid chill of his body. We hadn't been physically affectionate for a while—a mutant human-vampire pregnancy risk is a rather good deterrent—and I'd forgotten how steady I felt when he touched me.
"I wish I could help," I said quietly. "I tried to talk to the wolves when they first found out. Well...it was more of an argument than a conversation."
He sighed. "They appear to be beyond reason at this point."
"That's the thing," I said. "They've been such good friends. Dumb, but reliable. I trusted them fully, around my child. And then they pull this shit." I sighed. "It just doesn't make sense."
"None of this makes sense," Jasper mumbled. "Vampires shouldn't even be able to conceive children, and yet here we are."
"Yeah, that is bonkers," I said, frowning. "Aren't you guys, like, biologically frozen?"
"Carlisle's having an existential crisis over it, being a doctor and all."
I looked out over the forest for a moment.
"I have always quietly wondered how vampires can even have sex, if I'm honest," I said. "I mean, that process is pretty...biological."
Jasper chuckled. "I don't really know how it works. Just that, somehow, it does."
"Informative."
I squeaked as he jabbed my side.
The trees wafted from side to side in the breeze, casting dancing shadows on the damp grass in the pooling silver dribbling down from the moon. I stared through the treeline, hoping my gaze would find one of them. I wondered for a moment if they could hear our conversation, but then decided that I didn't care.
"When all this is over," Jasper said softly, "I'm going to build a house."
I turned my body so I could look at him, blinking ferociously. "Huh?"
He tucked a golden curl behind his ear and his lips curved into an amused smile. "I've found a little spot not too far from here, but far enough. A clearing in the woods further down the river."
"I don't think I'll ever get used to you saying things like you're going to build a house in such a casual way," I said.
He smiled a little wider and leaned down to kiss me, lingering for a tantalising second before he pulled away.
"I'll have to come and visit this new place. Make sure it's acceptably decorated."
"Excuse me—I am the interior designer here."
"Take that back."
"You know I'm right."