Graynin anxiously paced in front of his open windows that looked out onto the back property. He had been able to pick up very little from Ryder and Jade's practice. It had been hours since he had felt anything, and the last thing he had felt had sent him running from his room, grabbing his Tekana sword on the way. He had been overwhelmed by an eruption of raw energy, that had broken through Jade's shield. But Athos had stopped him in the hallway before he made it to the stairs, as if the old man had been waiting there the whole time.
The spastic characteristics of the energy blast made his hair stand on end. He had never experienced anything like it before, it was not one distinct element, it was more like fragments of all four colliding. It had felt primitive, and wild.
Graynin walked out onto the balcony, appreciating the cold breeze that swept across his bare chest. His reprieve was short lived as movement in the willows caught his eye. Stepping back inside, he watched as Ryder and Jade disappeared inside the house. Graynin quickly stuffed his arms into the sleeves of his shirt, and practically jogged down the hall. He was determined to find Jade and find out what happened before anything else could get in his way.
Rounding a corner he was just in time to watch Jade close the door to Athos' private study. He nearly turned to track down Ryder, but quickly dismissed the bad idea. Knowing that he was not the right person to comfort her after the wildness that had happened. No, she would want to find someone that would provide her with security, and he was not that person to her.
Instead, a glass of whisky was the best solution for the moment. But before his feet could lead him back to his room Athos' study door creaked open. Jade's tired, but fierce eyes emerged to glare at him. "Athos says you should be in here too."
He was grateful to be invited into the conversation, but also skeptical. Everything Athos did was calculated, the Healer went through life the way a person plays chess, with a brilliant plan that always had distractions and sacrifice.
The study's walls were covered in shelves, full of hundreds of books, and thousands of glass vials. All containing different mysterious properties, that Graynin wouldn't open if his life depended on it. Whether it be a vial or a book. The only bare spaces on the walls gave way to a large window, and on the opposite side, a large fireplace held a roaring fire.
Athos sat on a plush sofa facing the fireplace. His eyes smiled up at Graynin as he sipped his tea, as if his presence was a pleasant surprise. There were no signs of the broken old man that had visited Graynin last night, who had confided in him the looming threat of war, and death. No, Athos had returned to his usual comforting self.
Graynin dipped his head in greeting to Athos, before taking a seat in one of the matching chairs, at either side of the fireplace. Graynin waited for Jade to settle in, and Athos to fill her teacup. She looked even worse than Graynin had anticipated.
"Thank you." Jade said, as she accept the teacup.
"Of course, my dear, you need it. There are some herbs in the pot that will help you relax." Jade inhaled the steam, and let out a heavy sigh of relief.
Graynin just sat in his chair quietly, simply waiting for the undoubted storm to unfold. He fed the fire more oxygen, so that it jumped to a new level of life. He too was trying to provide Jade with some comfort, because despite the stuffiness of the room, he could still see her hands shaking around her teacup.
"She is not ready for any of this." Jade blurted out.
Athos' eyes shot to Graynin, pinning him with a command of silence. Athos anticipating his response, and killing it before he could utter it.
"Can you elaborate my dear?" Athos offered, his voice soft and encouraging, the opposite of what Graynin would have given her.
Jade looked into the fire, her fiery red hair released from its traditional cinched ponytail, allowing it to cascade down around her shoulders. "I have never seen anything like the explosion of power Ryder released today. She was unable to do even the simplest command before it. She couldn't even cause a ripple on the surface of the water. She felt like a Prosaic, there was simply nothing there. But I could feel the frustration and anger building inside of her, I prompted her to try something different and she just snapped."
Jade's eyes came away from the flames and looked between Athos and Graynin. "She locked me in a look of complete loathing, I have never seen anything so primitive in someone's eyes before, not even on the battlefield. I watched as the energy around her thickened, building slowly at first, and then suddenly it ignited and encompassed us both. It was as if time stopped and we were suspended in it, I saw streaks of lightning, chunks of granite, and rushing water, all locked in the orb of power around us. She looked inhuman as she seemed to be deciding whether to allow the elements to shred me apart or let me live. I cannot describe the extent of her connection with the elements, it was as if they could hear no one else but her. I tried to reach out to the water, in hopes of forming a defense if her desire to kill me won out, but the water didn't even respond to my call, it only heard her," Jade shuddered at the memory. "and then suddenly it all crashed down around us, and I was lying face down on the wet ground and Ryder was kneeling in it, looking like a lost child, all the power gone from her. We spent the last few hours in the grotto with me trying to comfort her. She apologized profusely, saying she hadn't meant to hurt me, and that she didn't understand what had happened. She even tried to continue with her lesson. I could see the pain in her eyes build as her first release of power exacted its price, gnawing at her muscles and brain."
Jade looked up to meet Graynin's grey blue eyes. She herself looked like a lost child, he thought. He had never seen her scared before, and she was petrified by what had happened. He felt the stir of his old instinct to cross the room and comfort her, even though she had never allowed it before. She had always been cold in their relationship, never wanting to need him. She never seemed to truly trust him. He had always resented it, but after the splitting of his soul, he understood the validity of her wanting to keep part of herself hidden from him, because she had known he could never fully be hers.
She broke eye contact, and pulled herself up to a more stoic posture, even now not wanting to give too much of herself to him. They both looked to Athos, waiting to see what light the Head Healer could shed on their disturbing situation.
Athos had lost the light-hearted twinkle in his eyes, he was now staring into the fire, and did not look at either of his companions as he spoke, "This is an interesting development." And calmly took a sip of his tea.
Jade spoke before Graynin could, "What's happing Athos, what's wrong with her?"
Athos seemed to emerge begrudgingly from his own thoughts, "Nothing's wrong with her, dear child. Her soul is simply much more fragile than we had predicted, the Pillars of Balance casting a stronger veil over her than we had thought. Now without the Pillars to hold her powers at bay and allow her soul to solely focus on healing, we see a juvenile collision between mind and power. She is unable to communicate with the elements, so only her powerful emotions are focused enough to call the elements into action. It's as if the four elements are rising to her defense, reacting to her need, rather than taking direction from a thought-out command the way they do for you." He gave Jade a gentle smile as if this settled the matter and they had nothing to worry about.
"Where do we go from here?" Graynin asked, seeing that Jade was stupefied by Athos calm, matter of fact answer to what had been one of the scariest displays of power she had ever witnessed.
Athos turned to Graynin, a look of compassion on his knowing face. "We continue as planned."
Jade aggressively chimed in, "You mean we are to keep trying to give her basic lessons? She almost killed me today!" She threw her teacup to the ground, where it dramatically shattered.
"But she didn't." Athos answered knowingly, his excitement growing, "She was strong enough to hold the elements back, and not give into their interpretation of what she wanted. She was in control." He slapped his thigh to emphasize his point. "You did a marvelous job today Jade, truly, I am more impressed with you than I have ever been before. We will continue her lessons, but we will not try and direct her so much. We must remember that it is the same soul in there, a soul that has never needed training, a soul that was born knowing how to make the elements dance to her song. We will change our tactics, we will expose her to the elements, and simply sit back and watch her work through them. I believe she will naturally find her way. And lessons like this will stimulate less..." He paused trying to find the word, "emotion. Also, Graynin, will be present at all tutoring sessions from now on." Athos said with finality.
Graynin felt his stomach drop. Up until now it had been by Athos instruction that he stay away from her, and now he was to be with her for hours on end. The new assignment brought both excitement and a renewed sense of pain.
"Are you sure that's necessary Athos?" Graynin asked, in his calm strong voice, showing no signs of his true feelings, and his desire to avoid this new form of torture.
Athos stared back at him with unwavering eyes, "Yes Graynin, it is absolutely necessary. You are the only one who is strong enough to contain her if she has another episode like the one today."
Jade let out a sarcastic huff.
Athos pretended not to hear her disapproval and went on, "But I don't want her to know you are there, I believe an extra presence will make her feel even more self-conscious and unsure of herself than she already is. Especially since she'll undoubtedly put two-and-two together that you are actually there as some sort of guard, only now being present after her first eventful lesson. We do not need to put more pressure on her, she is already putting more than enough on herself."
***
Once released from Athos' study, Graynin made his way out into the night. He needed to escape the four walls that seemed to be pressing in on him. He fought the urge to reach for his Tekana dagger, it had been noticeably pressing into his thigh, as Jade and Athos had talked about him like a lab rat. Both wondering aloud what possibilities lay before Ryder and his power connection. It reminded him of the Council, pragmatic and soulless.
Now he was free, pacing the perfectly manicured front yard, back in the darkness where he felt most comfortable. His eyes wandered to the constellations that flickered in the clear night sky above him, their lives seeming even more eternal than any of his people's. Time was such a fascinating thing, so much could change in a matter of seconds, or it could march on seemingly undisturbed for centuries.
His time had been so different than he had anticipated, he had been prepared for pain and death, every Souladeux was. But the overwhelming power of love he had not been prepared for. It was greater and cut deeper than any blade ever could. He had been crushed by its weight. He had wandered across the land trying to run from the pain, doing anything possible to distract himself from its relentless torment. He hadn't appreciated her enough, he had taken their time together for granted, being naive enough to think it would never end.
He had relived her death so many times, both in his dreams and in his painful memories. She had not told him her plan, she had not warned him of what she was going to do that day on the battlefield. She had simply held his kiss longer than normal. He should have known then that she was preparing to do something reckless. They had marched onto the battlefield together, her holding the backline with other female Souladeux, so they were protected as they fell into their power to work the elements, while he rode on, leading his troops to the front line. He remembered how deep his black Frisian stallion, Chast's, feathered hooves sunk in the slick mud. The rain had not stopped for three days, and he had felt the storm stirring above him once again. He had stolen one more look back at Aurora, her sky-blue blouse standing out against the dark trees and grey sky.
The battle had barely begun before she started pulling his power to her, calling it to build the storm she was planning to unleash. She had stripped him of so much power that he was left feeling empty, and when Chast danced away from an attack he had been left so disoriented that he fell from the horse's back. He had never felt so sick, but luckily his instinct took hold as he forced himself up from the muddy ground. He fell into the rhythm of death as he fought through the battle using only his Tekana sword, shutting his mind off from where his power usually laid. He remembered the mud pulling at his boots as he fought off the unending wave of opponents.
Dallius Fron had assembled a large number of all types of long-lived warriors to his cause with the promise of power, and unrestricted desire. The odds had not been in the Council's favor on that battle ground.
Graynin shook his head, not wanting to continue remembering. He needed to stop living in the past. She was here, alive, right at this moment. He needed to seize this precious second chance to start over with her, and help her through what is undoubtedly the most terrifying, and bewildering experience she would ever endured. He needed to be there for her regardless of whether she could ever see him as more. To be near her should be enough.
With that conclusion, he turned from the stars and went back to the house. He silently swept up the empty stairs but froze just before knocking on Ryder's door. Reconsidering what he was about to do. He couldn't do this, it would be a selfish act to pursue her at that very moment. He couldn't subject her to the memories that would be stirred up, her soul wasn't strong enough yet, today's events made that painfully clear.
Patience was his only option, something he greatly struggled with, he would have to continue to keep his distance. He would try and befriend her, rather than aggressively ignoring her. He ran his fingers through his wavy hair and looked to the coffered ceiling, releasing a sigh that practically turned into a hiss between his clenched teeth. Everything was so complicated and would continue to be in order to keep her safe.
Muffled voices caught his attention, he listened, trying to pin-point their location. He quickly realized that it was coming from Ryder's room. She wasn't alone. He didn't have to send his sense out to know who was in there with her, he had no doubt it was Tairin. It took all of his will power to keep from barging into the room and throwing the annoying Shadow out the window. He would not give her up so easily, he would fight for her.
"Let it begin." He whispered darkly to the closed door.