|VOTE & COMMENT| ----------------->
Heyloo! I'm super exited for this chapter. Yay! Chapter Probs isn't that long, but its quality over quantity right? Anyway, it'd be super helpful if you guys could tell me your thoughts on this one. Cause I was a bit skeptical about it. Especially now all hell's about to break loose, or so I'm hoping. >.>
I know at this moment some are like "WTF, who is it!" and that's exactly how I planned it. What's the point of it if you already know the answer?
I love the guesses, and I could say some of you were close. This chapter should eliminate some of the possibilities of who S.A could be, for good. Use the process of elimination darlings. ;)
And I would like to thank the two lovely ladies who will be taking on the task of editing this. Thank you. Love you girls.
Xx
Please do, vote if you enjoyed the chapter & leave a comment perhaps but most of all enjoy. =)
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Images flickered on his laptop monitor. They were shocking; he couldn't tear his eyes away from the flickering bright screen. He didn't regret his actions. He would never regret kissing Marcus. He'd been waiting for a moment like that since the first day he laid eyes on the boy. There was no way he would ever regret it. But just the thought of someone knowing made him uneasy. They were planning something, it was possible blackmail material. In the wrong hands the video could have terrible consequences, on both of them. He could just see the news headlines. It wasn't his reputation that he worried about, he couldn't careless about that, but if Marcus got caught in a scandal like this it could tear him apart. The reporters would trample all over him.
First there were the letters. They made little to no sense. How they had made it onto his presents was a mystery. Why someone would even think of doing something of the sort? It wasn't right, it was twisted. Then there were the presents that Julian hadn't sent, and now the video. Something was terribly wrong with the picture. None of the puzzle pieces fit together. It was either someone was interfering and trying to sabotage everything or they were planning something obscure. He had to find out who it was before it was too late. Something just wasn't right about the situation.
The effect it was having on Marcus was even more unbearable. Julian couldn't stop thinking about it, it just didn't make sense. He couldn't stand thinking about the effect it was having on Marcus. He needed copies of the letters. It couldn't be just one person, didn't seem like it, the clues were everywhere. It all appeared to be premeditated.
Maybe that was the answer. Maybe it wasn't one person. But that was preposterous. Either way he was not going to allow them to continue this any further.
Waking up that particular morning was exhausting. He felt tired and restless. The fogged windows and the cold air didn't make it any better. It was the first day of the New Year and honestly it wasn't starting to feel like a good start to the New Year.
Julian felt a pang of heartache that he hadn't felt in a while. All night worry had rummaged his thoughts to the point where his eyes felt dry.
The position Marcus was in was terrible. How and why would anyone do such as thing? He couldn't bear to see Marcus in such pain. Something had to be done, but the question was 'what'? Except for the letters, he didn't have a single lead. He didn't even know where to begin. The letters were useless because they made it seem as if Julian had sent them when he clearly hadn't. They gave no away no clues.
For god sake!
He hated how Marcus stopped him from calling the police. How could he not take it seriously! Yes, they'd get outed and news media would be all over them –especially Julian, but he'd risk it. He'd have to figure something out; he thought closing his eyes falling back in his chair. Shit!
His thoughts traveled to the instant that he had caught Marcus trembling and partially gasping for air. It was a side of Marcus he had never seen. The man always seemed rather calm, collected and happy. But to suddenly see him loose control, scared and venerable was shocking. Julian felt overprotective over Marcus to the point where it hurt.
Julian hadn't even given it a second thought before he rushed to Marcus' side. It was instinct. The fear and panic that shot through him was terrifying. He couldn't even comprehend what was happening for a moment, but when it occurred to him he didn't waste time to second guess his actions. He wrapped his arms around Marcus and held him close. His body felt perfect in his arms, like he was meant to be there. Marcus was having a panic attack and holding him, trying to calm him down was all he could do. Holding him so close felt so right, he never wanted to let go. His unyielding grasp tightened and he never wanted to let go. He wanted to hold Marcus there in his arms for as long as he could, even if it was for just a second longer. But Julian was convinced that it was never meant to be –they were too different and from completely different worlds. He shouldn't have jumped Marcus when they were at his apartment. The first time Marcus found out about Julian's feelings he shouldn't have just kissed him despite how much he wanted to. Now it was rather obvious that Marcus was avoiding him and it stung. Getting to hold the man of his dreams in his arms was an opportunity was a gift and he had all the intention of taking the most advantage out from. So Julian held him as tight as he could for as long as he could. He felt Marcus tremble subside and his arms slither around Julian's waist. A smile tugged on his lips for a split second before worry made his heart hammer against his chest.
If only he could be there by his side forever.
Julian sighed aloud, got out from his chair and left his room. The halls were quiet and rather lonely. The reminiscence of the night before brought a glint of hope to Julian's heart. Maybe there was a chance after all. It was a helplessly hopeful thought. Maybe he just had to fight for it? He scoffed at the thought. Hope was a strange thing, one could hope for anything but that didn't mean it would happen, that he would get it. Hope was hopelessly useless unless acted upon.
Walking down the hall a half opened door caught his eye. It was the guest bedroom... Pausing in his tracks for a moment curiosity bloomed. With his hand on the wooden door he wondered whether he should knock or just enter. The last thing he wanted to do was scare Marcus yet again. Going against his own will he slowly pushed it open. The inside was swallowed in darkness and he couldn't make out much for a moment. The only source of light was the little rays that came through the cracks in the curtains.
The room was so quiet that he could have heard a pin drop from a mile away. Once his eyes adjusted to the light he made his way to the side of the bed. Looking down at the man that slept in it he smiled. Warmth filled him. His smile dropped when he began to feel like a creeper. Regardless of how delectable and alluring he looked Julian couldn't disregard the sense. What if Marcus woke up and saw him?
It was the second time he had the chance to see Marcus sleeping. He could now understand why some men chose to watch the one they loved sleep, there was something calming and amusing about it.
He was happy that he asked, or rather insisted that Marcus stay at his place. He was sure that Marcus would refuse and he was right, Marcus did refuse at first but there was no way he was going to allow Marcus to drive himself to a hotel in the Hamptons or worse, drive himself home.
Julian brushed away the strands of hair that fell over Marcus' forehead, hiding his features. Then he brushed his thumb over Marcus' check softly making sure not to wake him up. His skin felt so warm, so soft, and so temptingly kissable.
If only he could wake up to Marcus by his side. That would be the day.
The urge to kiss triggered his thoughts. He shouldn't, it was wrong. He would be taking advantage of him. With that he stepped away. Marcus moaned in his sleep and turning the other way. Julian chuckled and closed the door behind him as he stepped out as quietly as he could.
"That is too creepy." He jumped at the unexpended voice that spoke from behind him and spun around, only to find his rather annoying brother standing behind him with a grin plastered on his face. "I know you've liked this guy since god knows when, but seriously dude, don't sneak into people's rooms. That's too creepy" He did have a point.
"Oh shut up Allen!" He said in annoyance and marched away hoping to get away from Allen. But the footfalls that followed him told him otherwise.
Down in the kitchen, Julian sat on the high chair around the kitchen counter. The steaming slice of left over pizza was somewhat unappetizing.
"I would have expected you to be happy bro. You have the guy of your dreams sleeping upstairs. But here you are being....you." Allen stated simply "so why aren't you ecstatic?"
Julian narrowed his eyes. He wasn't going to tell his brother anything. It could be anyone, and it would be easier if no one else knew.
"I'm not a morning person....remember?"
"Right well. That's a load of crap."
"Well if you don't do something about Marcus, someone else might." Allen stated in a strange serious tone that caught Julian off guard. Anger and a sudden sense of possessiveness came over him, it made him growl at brother.
"GOD! Calm Down. I have no interest in your man." He laughed. "I'm one hundred percent hetero remember?"
"uhu..." Just then a though crossed his mind. If it worked he could possibly find out who the culprit was once and for all. IF he was right, he would have a good lead.
"Allen do you have the guest list from the party yesterday with you?" he asked. Whoever it was would have had to be at the party the night before. None could get in without an invitation or at least providing some identification. The security cameras would have picked up on them as well. "hmmm" Allen gave him a questioning look and returned his attention to his coffee. "Yeah, Charles should have it."
That's all he needed to hear.
Leaving his brother perplexed he got up abruptly and went in-search of Charles. It didn't take him find the old man polishing the cars outside.
He was a strange character, but he was reliable, good, and he'd do anything for the Dalton family. Julian and Allen practically grew up with him –their parents were almost never around. Julian did however notice Charles strange dislike towards Marcus, but then again he'd always been the 'traditional' type.
Right after Haden and his brother, Charles was the one he came out to back when he was in high school. His parents only found out a couple of years after.
"Good Morning Charles." He greeted flatly.
"Morning Sir." He said slightly turning to Julian, then returning back to his work. "Though I must tell you Sir, its quarter past midday"
Julian laughed and leaned on the side of the car. "Charles, Allen told me that you might have the guest list from yesterday...." Julian's voice trailed. Charles nodded taking in Julian's words. "I want to take a look at the list"
"Why sir," he paused and looked at Julian. "Is everything okay?" Concern outlined his tone.
"Yes, I just wanted to check something." Julian ran his fingers through his hair and turned to face the sun. It felt warm against his skin, but he'd choose Marcus' warmth over the sun's any day. "It's rather urgent; could you get it for me now?"
"Sure, right away" The inquisitiveness in his voice was obvious as he left.
Standing outside for a brief moment absorbing the fresh air he went inside. But he stopped in his tracks when he saw a pair of Chrystal blue eyes stared at him. A shiver ran down his back as a smile passed his lips. Those eyes made him slightly nervous and happy all the while making him want to hug the one who those eyes belonged to. That was what he wanted to do, not what he would do. It was rather depressing.
When their eyes met an unexpected chuckle passed Julian's lips. The sight of Marcus standing that foot of the stars red faced was too much, he couldn't help it. Marcus looked.... adorable. As much as he hated to use that word, it was the only one that would describe the innocent lost kitten like expression. The clothes he wore were couple of sizes too big on him. They weren't his own clothes; they were in fact Julian's. The sight exited him, it was sexy. Marcus was far from being 'hot'. The sky blue yes and his slim built hinted towards 'cute' rather than hot. There was something so venerable about him.
Marcus' eyes traveled to every surface in the room avoiding Julian's gaze. Julian held back a chuckle and smiled as he walked closer to Marcus. It was disappointing and annoying. Marcus' reddening face however was rather amusing.
What was going through his mind? Julian wondered as he said "good morning" His voice ended up sounding playful and not serious like he had intended it to be.
"M-Morn-ning." Marcus stammered looking at the floor as if it was the most interesting thing in the room. It got on Julian's nerves, he narrowed his brows. Great! Now I'm jealous of inanimate objects...what's next? Why couldn't he just look at him?
Was he nervous?
Julian relaxed his expressions and asked a question he already new the answer for.
"Did you sleep okay Marcus?" Marcus seemed to stiffen at the sound of his own name.
He nodded in reply and nibbled on his lower lip. A groan threatened to escape from Julian's lips. It was pure torture for him to watch Marcus act the way he did. What are you doing to me Marcus?
"That's great" he paused, thinking of what he should say next. He didn't want the conversation to end or for it to get awkward. "Let's get you something to eat. Come with me." he said motioning Marcus to follow him.
Walking into the kitchen he hoped that Allen wasn't there. He would only make things awkward with in a matter of seconds. Julian sighed with relief when he saw the empty kitchen.
What were they meant to talk about? As far as he knew, they had nothing in common. He realized that he knew nothing about the man. It was disappointing.
He really didn't want to bring up the night before, not yet anyway. But Marcus had a different idea. He brought it up like it was nothing. It was the least expected thing Julian had anticipated to hear.
"I didn't mean for any of this to happen Mr. Dalton" His sincere tone was heartwarming. But what the hell was he talking about? How many times did he have to ask Marcus to not call him Mr. Dalton? Before Julian could protest Marcus spoke again. "I appreciate what you're trying to do. But if I never asked you to do it you wouldn-"
Julian was at his limit. He couldn't listen to the bulls*it Marcus was spilling. The pleasant feeling he had vanished. It was replaced by frustration and increasing anger.
"SHUT UP!" Julian growled and slammed his hand on the marble countertop, making it vibrate. Marcus jumped at the loud noise, his face paled and fear dominated his features. That wasn't Julian's intention but what Marcus was saying... it stung too much. Marcus was straight-out rejecting him and he wouldn't have any of it. The sorrow was evident in Marcus' eyes it only assured him that Marcus hadn't meant a single word in an offensive manner. There was something Marcus was hiding. He was usually an open book.
"So, are you trying to say Marcus?" Julian asked after calming the aggravated tone in his voice. "Are you trying to say that you regret everything that happened?" His voice was harsh and demanding. That you regret kissing me? he added silently.
Something snapped inside, he didn't know what came over him. His lips felt dry and blood rushed though his system. He really didn't want to know the answer because there was a chance that Marcus would say 'yes'.
Marcus pressed his lips together tightly and his bottom lip trembled, yet he didn't answer. The longer he took to answer the question the less positive Julian felt. He felt down right rejected, which only caused anger to boil in him. The anger was aimed at himself for ever letting it get out of control, or even holding on to hope. Julian looked at the floor for a moment and shook his head trying to come to terms with the apparent reality. He smirked aloud, who was he kidding? It was lost cause. He couldn't turn off the hurt that built in him.
He pushed himself away from the counter –what ever.
He was about to walk away when he heard Marcus' voice from behind him.
"Wait." Marcus has been saying quite a bit lately.
"What?" Julian's voice was strained and harsh. His fingers pinched the bridge of his nose as he spun around. He taken by surprise he was face to face with Marcus. When had he gotten so close?
"I don't..." Marcus said. His words were rushed, almost pleading. "I don't. I don't think I could ever regret it." His voice trembled even more and he shook his head vigorously denying Julian's assumptions, like he was trying to convince himself. Hints of fear were chiseled into Marcus' features and Julian's heart clenched at the sight of it. His clear blue eyes that peered at Julian were fogged with tears that threatened to trickle down his clear, soft skinned cheeks any second.
Julian held his breath, his heart tightened and eyes widened as he watched those blue eyes. When Marcus stepped closer and grabbed on to the fabric of his shirt Julian was caught off guard.
Had he heard it correctly?
There was a burst of happiness in him, but everything was moving so fast that he couldn't even process the information.
"I don't regret it..." what followed next was unpredicted, unseen, unexpected! Marcus' soft warm hands cupped Julian's tightly. When Marcus looked up at his eyes for a moment he thought Marcus might kiss him. He was slightly breath-taken. For once in his life he was at a loss for words. Marcus' hands left Julian's hands and they ran up Julian's shirt to his collar. He held a tight grip on it while pulling Julian down to his level and pressing their lips together. He felt the anger and assorted irritation just melt away. His tensed body relaxed but before Julian could kiss him back Marcus pulled away, leaving behind the sensation of his lips tingling. "I would never regret it!" he said with an inaudible sob and nuzzled his face in Julian's chest, clutching on to the shirt.
Julian was still lost for words. Yes, he'd dreamed of a moment like this, but never in a million years did he expect it to happen.
Julian let go of his breath and bit down on his lower lip with a smile sneaking on to his lips. He wrapped his arms around Marcus tightly and protectively. Calmness washed over him, and warmth filled him. He didn't know how else he to react, he was just stunned.
"I just didn't want any of this affect you. I didn't want to drag you into this Mr. Da- Julian" Marcus corrected himself as he spoke in a muffed voice. Julian's smile grew.
"I know" he whispered and kissed the top of Marcus' head.
–Marcus I don't care about what it'll do to me...
Pulling away Julian smiled and placed his hands at the base of Marcus' neck and forced him to look up. The bright orbs of blue glistened in the light.
Because I just may love you.
More than anything...
Maybe hope wasn't a lost cause after all.
So where dose this leave them?
Someone cleared their throat catching them by surprise. It caught both their attention. He looked over with slight hint of annoyance for ruining the moment. Marcus' face heated and he jumped away leaving Julian's arms empty. Julian chuckled in amusement but he was partially annoyed at the one who interrupted them. The moment was perfect, he was about to kiss Marcus.
Charles stood at the doorframe with a thin file folder in his hands. Julian's thoughts clicked, he remembered what he had asked of Charles. The old man kept unmoved façade as he walked up to Julian.
"The documents you asked for sir" he said handing Julian the beige file folder.
Thanking him Julian took it and scanned over the long list of names. None of them seemed out of the ordinary...until his eyes landed on one particular name that shouldn't have been there.
Why were they at the party?
He looked over to Marcus, who was clueless and was staring at the ground in embarrassment. He turned his attention back to the list.
-It can't be...
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The title & some inspiration for this chapter was brought to you by the attached song:
I Want = One Direction (don't kill me hahaha) Thus the name. ;) give it a listen if you like.
"I want, I want, I want,
But that's crazy
I want, I want, I want,
And that's not me
I want, I want, I want,
To be loved by you
Be loved by you
I wanna, I'll stay true
I wonder if you knew
What you put me through
But you want, you want, you want me to love you too" <3