Nakarating ako sa parking ng Podium kung saan namin napagusapan na magkikita muna. I parked my car and waited for a while. Hindi ko kaagad maprocess na mangyayari na ang mga susunod na mga nangyayari. It might not go as I see it but bahala na. It has been a while since I saw him.
I took a dew deep breaths. Mayakap ko kaya sya ng ayos? Will he hug me back? Will he sense my need for a hug? Will I seem desperate for a hug from him kung pwede ko naman ituloy nalang na yakapin ang stuffed toy ko? This is making me anxious. Paano kung tumayo lang sya don at ako lang ang ecstatic? Kung di match ang energies namin at mapahiya ako?
"Stop thinking too much," someone then knocks on my window, "baba ka." Holy freaking shit, it was Ricci, Rasheed and Prince all in one window view. I almost melted. "Waaaaah! Wait lang po!" I screamed sa kilig, obviously. My fangirl self kicked in and uncontrollably shivered. Tangina, Adaline. Not in front of them. "Helloooo, kami lang to....ano nga ulit name nya?" Rasheed asked curiously while Prince smiled suspiciously at Ricci. He rolled his eyes and pulled them away from my car at kinausap. He looked like he was trying to argue while his brothers were laughing. He kept on rolling his eyes, groaning in frustration.
Pagkababa ko ng sasakyan at naglagay ng hood ng jacket dahil mainit, they all glanced at my direction. Out of the 3 of them, Ricci was the only one giving me a death glare habang yung dalawa were beaming at me. Tinaasan ko si Ricci ng kilay bago ko kawayan ng masigla sina Prince. They both whispered "hug?" and opened their arms.
Ricci, on the other hand, walked towards me with a poker face and a judgy look. I opened my arms for a hug with a convincing, lit up face. "Huuuug?" I said. He smiled like a softy baby and opened his arms wide. Puta, nanlambot ako for a second pero nagpatuloy parin akong lumakad... hanggang sa naisip kong asarin nanaman si Ricci. Hmmm, what could he possibly do? Run away? Walk out? Pull me back?
I continued to walk towards him, still smiling and looking ecstatic. "Naka on nanaman yang fangirl mode mo, Ada." he chuckled at namewang muna saglit. Malapit na ako sa kanya nang maglakad ito approaching me with his arms wide open parin. Sinisignalan ko na sa tingin ang mga kapatid nya na tingin ko ay hindi nya pansin dahil busy syang irap irapan ako.
"Huuuuuug!" makulit kong sigaw at nagakmang lampasan siya ngunit hinagip ako ng arms nya sa may leeg at hinarang. "Huuuuug!" patuloy na sigaw ko at tinanggal ko ang pagharang niya sakin. He chuckled absurdly, making it almost scary for me to look back. "Aray, Cci ah! Shaket! Grabe syah! Buti ikaw may cushion ka in a form of double chin!" I joked and put up a peace sign in advance, just incase he's whispering beneath his breath and casting spells on me. I felt that he threw tiny stones at me but I didn't bother to look back. Scary Ricci, baka di ako yakapin. Iisip muna ako palusot for wanting to hug his brothers first bago siya.
I went on to hug Prince and Rasheed and unsolicitedly ranted about how I'm a fan of them and since when ko sila kilala. Typical me at first pero nung narealize kong 'di na to panaginip, I was nudged back to my senses and kumalma na. I was on the verge of asking about Achi Eileen, Prince's ex girlfriend. Siya kasi yung naabutan ko and tumatak sakin na they called each other "egg". Cute lang. They were 21. 23 na sila ngayon. It has been 2 years na pala.
I poked Prince's cheeks, "totoo ka?" and asked. "Grabe, totoo ka nga!" I exclaimed, Rasheed giggled like a cute kid and nodded. "Now I see why my brother likes you. Ang cute and kulit mo."
Bigla naman akong nasamid ng walang rason nang dahil sa sinabi ni Prince. "Ano po 'yun?" I whispered, "Your brother likes me?" I intriguely asked at nanginig halos lahat ng kalamnan ko. Hindi ako nakaimik si Prince so slowly, kinulbit ko itong muli. "Kuya? Crush nyo po ako?" I asked shocked. Mangmang na kung mangmang, hindi ko alam kung alin sa mga kapatid nya kaya si Prince nalang.
"Brother nya ba sarili nya, ha?" Ricci interrupts from afar. He heard what I said kahit pabulong na. Siniringan ko sya at umimik, "Alam mo, ikaw, napakasungit mo. Nireregla ka ba ha? Red flag nanaman ah--"
"Eh kasi!" reklamo niya pa. Pinanlakihan ko ito ng mata na siya namang naging signal para ikalma nya ang sarili nya. "Cci, please! Alam kong namiss mo 'ko pero pwede sandali lang? Chill..... pere nemeng shira to eh...", pagiinarte kong siguradong iirita nanaman sa kanya. "Tsk! Bahala ka nga!" he replied and turned away. I smiled at his brothers and said "Sanay na tayo diyan." They both agreed. "You know the drill na. Ang galing. How many months have you been talking na?"
"I honestly lost count." sagot ko. "Di ako nagbibilang ng buwan kapag may kausap ako."
Rasheed stepped in. "Kumusta siya kausap?" he smiled and I got the chills. Gago, nakakalunod yung mata. Ang ganda. "Uhhh, okay naman po. Magkasundo naman kami....minsan. Bagal magreply eh. Minsan oras ang pagitan, but its working."
"What's working?" Prince asked, a little stunned. May mali kaya sa nasabi ko? "U-uhhm, yung friendship....? Kung friends talaga kami. I mean... we're not anything more than that pero baka di niya din ako tinuturing na kaibigan. Acquiantance, acquaintance. This acquaintance is working." I smiled at him and he looked convinced. Lumapit ito near my ear and whispered, "tell me if friends na kayo...or mafeel mo na more than that. I'll help you to continue and finally win his heart." he winked then Rasheed came in again to change the topic. They asked basic questions and made my heart skip beats— they're just truly amazing. Wonder why people bother to think of their girl friends as romantic partners eh talaga naman ngang masaya silang kasama without commitments.
I talked to Rasheed and Prince 10 minutes more bago ko marealize na naghihintay nga pala si Cci sakin sa likod namin.
——
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SABI MO SA INTERVIEW MO SA TV DI KA SELOSO
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PANAKOT NAMAN TO BEH WAIT LANG
beh mo to 🙄😒
——
Nagpaalam muna ko kina Prince, tumalikod at nilapitan si Cci. "Ricci." pagtawag at kulbit ko dito ngunit hindi ito lumingon kaagad. Dahan dahan akong naglakad papunta sa harap nya, cautious enough to not touch him before he allows me to.
Nakasimangot ito sa akin at iniirap irapan ako. "Hoy, kung dukutin ko kaya yang mata mo--"
"Hug naaaa, gutom na ko! Tsk! Kainis naman 'to eh" inis nyang sabi and opened his arms wide enough for me to fit. "Aarte pa o aalis na ko? Kumakalam na sikmura ko. Yakapin mo na ko, kailangan mo ng yakap diba?"
A weird smile formed on my lips. Tangina. I chuckled and walked baby penguin steps to get in his arms. I kept my arms to myself while he was the one who hugged and tucked me in. I smiled at the feeling of being here— safe, comfortable and calm— like I've never felt this ever before.
I placed my chin on his shoulder then hid again. I forced him to walk and hid between cars para di awkward at walang makakita. Hindi siya umiimik. "Natameme ka ata?"
"Ayoko masayang energy ko. Baka wala kang makuhang energy, mamaya di ka pa marecharge." he spoke softly, without a hint of irritation na. "Fluffy. Patouch sa cheek-"
"Ayoko."
"Dali na!" panggigil ko. He tightened his hug like he was trying to strangle me. "Ayoko nga!"
"Hinahayaan na nga kitang yakapin ako eh. Kahit gaano kahigpit kasi ikaw ata may kailangan magrecharge, Cci."
"Hindi. Feeler ka."
I bantered immediately. "Ano kamo?! Feeler ako? Oo, feel na feel ko ngang hindi mo 'ko gusto kaya si Gab nalang--". Bigla naman akong kinurot sa arm which made me pinch him back. "Masakit??? Nakikiyakap at recharge na nga lang eh. Rereklamo pa, Cci? Rereklamo paaaa?"
"Ang dami mong sinasabi. Sige nga, paano marerecharge? Yakapin mo kaya muna ko pabalik?"
"Paano kung ayoko?" pangungundisyon ko habang nakatayo lang, still keeping my hands to myself. Hindi siya kaagad umimik. "Grabe naman.. Napaka one way naman nito... tsk tsk tsk.." he chuckled softly with a bunch of sarcasm. I chuckled too. "Hindi to half-hearted hug ha?"
Umiling si Ricci and semi- snuggled in my neck and rested his chin on my shoulder. "Mauuna ba ko yumakap kung half-hearted to?" he shrugged. "Sige na, konti nalang to. Sabi mo seconds lang sayo diba?"
"Ha? Ayoko nga!" gulat kong depensa. "Bawal ba magbago ng isip?"
"Pwede. Bawiin mo rin yung sinabi mo kanina."
"Alin don? Yung patouch ng cheek?" I said and he nodded. I pouted. "Eh ang fluffy eh!" reklamo ko. He finally tried released hold of me pero ako naman ang yumakap ng mahigpit sa kanya, making him stop leaving and giving him no more choice but to stay.
Ganito talaga siguro pride ko. Umaabot lagi sa punto na pag may bibitaw na, saka lang bibigay at kakapit ulit. Sama sa feeling. What if I didn't get to hold him just as he was about to leave? Would that leave me here hanging, asking for a pissed off and done Ricci Rivero to give me another chance?
"May moon?" tanong nya out of the blue. We both looked up at sabay rin umiling. "Walang moon sa umaga." I said. Umiling siya ulit. "The moon's somewhere up there. Di mo lang kita kasi may nangingibabaw. May mas lamang."
"Anong mas lamang?" tanong ko. "Yung araw. Sunshine ba?" sagot nya. "Ang liwa-liwanag eh, oh. Nasisilaw ka na nga eh."
"Ricci, the moon always comes back. I'm far way more into looking at the moon than the sun." Silence then wrapped the next moments.
Later on, we came to realize we have been really hugging for the past minute. "Okay ka lang?" I asked Ricci. Umiling siya. "Ikaw?" I sighed deeply, umiling and let go of the tension. "Magiging okay siguro, pero kakailanganin ulit kita." sabi ko and he nodded at hinayaan na akong bumigay sa kanya and hugged him tightly, gathering all the energy that I'll need and giving all that he'll need too, nakayakap lang with no intention of letting go. I pinched his cheek once too, kilig ako sa sobrang fluffy at dahil sa fact na hinayaan niya ako. He smiled and spoke, "Ako din, kakailangan ko." he sighed, "ako din."