FAWN
"I think that this book is a strong contender for the award."
I look up at Adam Rivers, one of the guys that work in editing at our publishing house. Other editors in this meeting agree with him, and I smile. I smile because they're talking about Olivia's novel.
Every year, Royals House of Literature hosts the Royal Awards for written works in different genres. They ask some of the best publishing companies with best-selling books to present their suggestions for the award. They also look at other books, take all in the information and reader feedback into consideration, and then announce the winners at the award show.
This was our third and last meeting before we sent Royals our list, and we had managed to narrow it down to fifteen, which we are trying to cut down to our final ten.
"Fawn, you're the editor for this book, At Sunset. You think we should put it in our top ten," Michelle Tanaki, another editor, asks me. My eyes pan the board room, looking over at all twelve of the editors that sit in the room representing their authors' novels.
I give a slow nod, "absolutely. In my opinion, it embodies everything that's great about the romance genre in a way that romance fans are familiar with, and introduces readers that dabble in other genres to what they might be missing out on. The protagonist is relatable, good yet flawed. The supporting characters feel like people in one's own life. Conflicts are calculated, every moment has meaning. It's damn near perfect."
Michelle smiles, and looks around, "well, I vote yes for At Sunset to be the last addition to our list of possible nominees. Anyone else?"
One by one, everyone puts up their hands, including me.
"Well," I start to gather my things, "that settles it, then."
******
Mmm...
MMMM!
Oh. My. God.
"This pasta is amazing!" I exclaim, moaning in pleasure from the flavours in my mouth.
Michelle and Alison laugh as they sat at either side of me at this restaurant. It was close to the office, and my treat for a job well done and a close to the quarter.
Michelle smirks, spooling pasta primavera around her fork, "I doubt it's amazing as sex, which is what you're making it seem like." She pops the pasta into her mouth, stifling a hum as she chews.
"This shit is bomb."
"Is it as good as sex," Alison asks her.
Michelle looks down at her plate, actually thinking seriously about the quality of her food. She nods, "it could be..." Her eyes went to Alison, "depends on what kinda sex you're having."
"Excuse me!" Ali smacks Michelle's arm as she gasps, and I giggle at the sight of the two of them.
"For the record," I take a sip of my water in between words, "I said nothing about sex."
They look over at me, then at each other, and then at me again.
I laugh, "what is it?"
Ali digs into her lasagna, sinking into her seat a little. I look at Michelle, who is staring off into what looks like space. She does that for a few minutes until she realizes I'm waiting for her to say something the entire time. Michelle sighs, looking me in the eyes.
"Okay... Maybe you didn't say anything about sex because you've never had it...?"
My hand goes to my heart, "well, that hurt."
"Sorry."
I stab my pasta and stuff it into my mouth, "I- I have... done... plenty of other things."
"Okay Holy Mary."
My mouth opens to retort when I notice my phone buzz. I take a look at the screen and see that it's a text from Trent.
I haven't seen you in a bit. How about we get a drink tonight?
I type out a quick response, then put it down on the table.
Srry, I have plans with my baby and couch. Maybe another night?
"Who are you texting Fawn?" Alison asks. Michelle gives me a look, "her lover."
I dismiss their nosiness with a wave of my hand, "it doesn't matter who I'm texting."
Michelle quirks a brow, "so I'm right? Are you getting some from Mr. Rich?!"
"I'm- Oh, sorry," and I get another text.
I'm down to Netflix and Chill... or more than chill...
Someone is hot and bothered.
"Well, I'm ready to go. I'm gonna get a doggy bag. How about you guys," Ali asks. I nod, and Michelle waves over our server.
Once all our food is packed, we stack our plates and bowls, then make our way out of the restaurant. I grab a few mints and toothpicks by the host stand right before I open the door.
Michelle stretches her arms out wide as she walks through the exit. So much so that she nearly hits someone that's attempting to walk past her. Her shirt comes untucked slightly, and she lets out a loud sigh, "it feels amazing to have the afternoon off."
"And the next two weeks," Alison adds.
I grin, "right? We might as well call it a year, it's been a good run if I do say so myself."
Alison wraps her arm around my shoulder, "you'd never."
"I know."
"Well," Michelle gives me a hug, then Ali a hug, "I will see you ladies soon. I'm sure sometime before this break is over. Stay good girls."
"Bye love," I say, waving at her as she walked to her car.
"I'd better get going too. My husband is at home packing his bag, waiting for me to pack mine so we can head off to Montreal for a long weekend." Alison says as she takes my hands. She gives them a quick squeeze. "I'll be in touch. Say hi to the baby for me."
"Say hi to hubby for me," I tell her. And with that, she is off to her car.
I glance down at my phone once Ali is in her car, then sigh, "I guess it's time for me to-"
"Oh my... Fawn?!"
My head snaps to the right, and there stands a woman who looks to be about my age. She's dressed in a green maxi dress, and is clutching her bag as her big hazel eyes stare at me. She knows my name, but I don't recognize her. Especially with those large Gucci sunglasses she's wearing.
"I'm sorry... Do I know you?"
The woman takes the glasses off her eyes, and her hazel eyes shine in the sun as she smiles at me, "I'm Becca. Becca Moyne, we were in art class together in high school."
"Oh!" I walk over to her, closing the distance between us, "yes, oh my gosh! It's been like five years! How have you been?"
"Good. A lot has happened over the years, but I've been good. You?"
I nod, then look back at where I was trying to go, "I'm great. Hey, I actually have somewhere to be, I was just walking to my car-"
"I'll walk with you! I'm headed in that direction."
We walk and talk, catching up about some of our other classmates, and matching stories about some of the things that had happened with them as well as ourselves. As we get closer to my car, Becca smiles.
"I'm glad I ran into you today. There's something I need to talk to you about."
I stop in my tracks, and then she stop.
It's like my inner self is waving a red flag that reads "danger" on it, and alarms are going off in my mind.
"...How would you have something you need to tell me... If-"
"I'm Brenda, your baby's, birth mom, and I want her back!" She blurts out, then sighs as though a weight has been lifted from her shoulders. I, on the other hand, feel like that same weight is thrown onto every part of my body.
My stomach twists, and it feels like my abdomen is tangled in a large, intricate knot.
"What... I don't-"
"Two years ago, you donated your eggs to a bank, which was amazing and generous. A few months after that, my boyfriend and I used your eggs and donor sperm to fertilize the eggs and implant them in me. He has a low sperm count, and I had almost no eggs, so that was our last option after trying with our own genes. It took two tries, and then we got Ami. But, he left me for someone else and I just... I couldn't...
Anyway, I found your info and I gave her to you, which you know. I figured since you're her bio mom and a good person. But, my boyfriend wants to be in her life now and I think he should be so... I want her back."
My eyes are wide, and I back slowly away from her on the somewhat busy street. She watches me as tears fill my eyes.
"You've been stalking me!"
Becca reaches out, "no! I swear I ran into you by accident today."
I suck in a breath, "right near where I-. No," I shake my head, "I shouldn't say anymore before I call the police."
"Please, don't do that. I just want to talk," Becca took a step towards me, and I took five steps away from her.
"Don't! I swear to God, you'd better leave me alone."
I turn around and run towards my car. Before I get in, I look around for her to see if she is watching me. When I know she isn't, I get into my car and drive home.
"Oh my God... Oh my God!"
******
"Mama, aba mama!" Ami squeal with joy when I pop up behind my hands. I smile and pick her up, "I got you!"
I rock her in my arms, studying her happy features. She's so beautiful, and it's hard to believe how lucky I am to have this amazing girl in my life. My baby.
Not only is she my baby in a familial way, biologically she is my child. No wonder she looks so much like me.
It is definitely a lot for one day. Finding out that Ami is related to me, and that I was chosen because of my DNA. Now the woman that chose me wants to take my baby from me. A baby that she gave up because things didn't work out with her boyfriend?!
I don't know what that's like, but I would never. I believe that giving up a child is hard, and brave. But her story just doesn't seem right. Only wanting her back for the sake of her ex that left her?
"I love you, Ami. I love you, and I'll do everything I can to protect you."
I hold her close, kissing her cheek as tears roll down my face. It feels like I could lose her any second, and I don't think I'd survive that.
"It's just cruel-"
Knock, knock, knock!
My head moves from Ami's as I stare at the door. My heart pounds, and I think of the worst.
"What if it's Becca? She knows where I live."
I stay where I am, breathing deep as I weigh the options of what I should do in my head. Eventually, I get up with Ami in hand and walk to my front door. Before I look into the peephole, I make sure I have my phone in my hand, ready to call 911.
Slowly, I lean into the door and close one eye, using the other to look through the small hole. I feel instant relief when I see who's waiting on the other side.
I go back over to the living room to put Ami on her mat under her mobile, then walk back to open the door.
Kevin's eyes light up as I look at him, and his smile is wide, "Fawn, hi."
I give him a small smile in return, "Kevin... Hey." I look down at the floor, and I start to feel tears well up in my eyes again. My throat gets tight, and I fight the urge to cry. It feels like the best timing in the world that he's here right now, but I'm scared to let him into what might turn into a huge mess.
I start to close the door and, to my surprise, Kevin holds it open. My eyes move up to look into his.
"What are you doing here, Kevin?"
*********