Chapter Sixteen
Turning up at the studio after such an exciting few days feels rather depressing. With a long to-do list, my regular caramel latte isn't going to give me enough energy to tackle these tasks today. I'd rather be curled up in bed ignoring the world for a little longer, but Ava insisted that I needed to be in the studio.
"Hello," the receptionist calls as I walk into the door.
"Hey," I softly say, "I'm just going to fall asleep in the recording studio," I announce as I make a bee line to the elevator.
"Have fun." He chuckles back.
I get into the elevator and press some buttons to make the machine move. Within seconds the door has opened and I walk into the recording room. Since I've become a big and like my own space, I don't have people bugging me while I'm working on my material, which is nice.
Alex would make the occasional sneaky stops to check on me, and I managed to haul Archer's butt to the ground floor to make him wait for me there. I'm pretty sure he enjoyed the chase, it certainly beat sitting around watching me do nothing interesting.
Before I enter the room, I hit the record button then slip through the glass door and make my way over to the table. With my caramel latte and left over Chinese food, I start preparing myself for a long day in the studio.
Ten in the morning doesn't roll around any quicker than I would have liked. I call in my producer, James to have a look at the material I've been working on. It had taken me a while to trust him, but he's a preferred person who understand the direction I want to take with my work and he always seems to know how to get there.
"He Enna," he calls out.
"James, finally." I come running out the recording section to envelop him in a tight, friendly hug. "I've missed your guidance."
"I've missed you too." He squeezes me back.
When we part from our hug, I drag him inside the booth to show him my squiggles for lyrics. The pages is completely filled with different variations and line thoughts from where I've changed my mind. But at the end of the day, it's always good to have options and a finished song.
I sing through my new material and with a different coloured pen, he makes some different changes either to the beat of the wording so that the lines flow and is in sync together nicely.
"Read to record the vocals?" he asks.
"What about my music?" I ask.
"You can either sing it to something acoustic at this point, or I can mock something out on the instruments," he explains.
"But."
"It's just a demo to show higher up and a chance for me to play with the backing track more when you're away," says James.
"Fine, let's start recording." I grab the book off the table and walk towards the booth to record some vocals. "If I sound bad, just delete the track," I call out before stepping inside.
"You'll sound amazing, you always do."
I fix the room up and get myself prepared. Whenever I step inside, I always worry about how bad I might sound or what may happen and it sends my stomach lurching with nerves. I set up the stand and balance my book, then out of habit go to pick the earphones up, but leave them hanging off the stand.
I jump up and down, shake the wiggles out of my arms before giving James the thumbs up to let me start recording.
"You had me at hello, you have me at goodbye. I promised I'd never hurt you, yet your siting in the dark. I waited by the phone, you left me falling hard. I guess we'll never get past this. Hello, hello, where did you go? Goodbye, goodbye, don't come back. I hurt you, you hurt me," I sing before motioning James to stop recording.
"Problem?" comes over the speaker.
"I hate it." I shake my head.
"Try it without the line, I guess we'll never get past this. And I want more emotion in hello and goodbye," he replies.
James restarts the recording and I take his advisements into consideration as I try singing the lines again. I try to slip back into the emotional state I was in when I first wrote the song. It's hard, digging that all back up. Before I know it, I'm belting out those lyrics with tears streaming down my face.
"How was that?" I brush the tear steaks off my face.
"You blew me away," he honestly replies.
"Good, that's what I was aiming for."
James and I muck around in the booth for a little longer. When I have enough vocals laid down, I walk out of the booth with a dire thirst for some cold water to sooth the burning ache assembling in my throat.
"You're going to knock them dead." He pats my shoulder with encouragement.
"Hopefully, I don't to be torn to shreds by the critic's." I shiver at the thought.
"How is the music for Sienna coming along?" he asks.
"Really good, have some more material to put into the album after the last couple of weeks I've been having." I sigh.
"I'm excited to hear it."
"I will show you it soon, hopefully. I want a more punk rock vibe in some of the tracks, and I'm not sure how to get there."
"You're talking to the master." James compliments himself.
"Next time I come through, I'll bring you the new work!" I promise.
"Have you considered a different name for the album?" James suddenly asks.
I take a seat on the desk and mull over his question. After writing a lot about my emotional turmoil, it just seemed fitting to have Sienna as the title of the record. And with my face printed alongside it to – the iconic side of me, I figured it would help brand and advertise my new work rather than starting from scratch again. Now that Sienna is facing the chopping block, it makes me worried about what'll happen when the pillow hits the fan.
Hopefully it'll bust into a storm of fluffy feathers instead of having the cushion boomeranged back and punch me in the face.
"Just seemed obvious," I answer.
"If the album is about the two of you, why not have a cross name?" he suggests.
Just as I was about to dismiss his thought, I'm incredibly grateful for the suggestion because James sure did have a good point. Sienna might have been bigger than me, but Sienna couldn't be her without the likes of Riley.
"I like your idea."
I open my book to a blank page and write both Sienna and Riley next to each other so that I can look at name plays. The first thing I write down is Sienley and it instantly just clicks. It reminds me of serenity, which brings a warm tingle to my heart.
James hovers above me as he looks down at the page. I hear him mutter something, and then the words, "Sienley," come from his mouth.
"Do you like it?" I ask.
"Love it." He swiftly nods his head, "Nobody else is going to have an album name like this, ever."
"I love the idea, it's amazing."
"You could have half of Sienna's face and the other half Riley to assist the title. It would be a good album concept to submit to the world." That's one thing I like about James, he had solid ideas to help benefit me – he'd never taken what I'd showed or expressed to the media, another artist or made fun of me. He loved music on the same level as I did, which made talking to him so easy.
Connecting on a music scale was one of the first things that drew me to Alex. I loved his style, vocal range and the ability he as to write lyrics with so much power and emotion. While Nathan gives me so many different thrills and helps me escape from my soul sucking career, I worry about what this might do.
I'd always have James to plotter and discus music with, but would that be enough. I've shared so many moments and built up and emotional connection with Alex and diving back into these songs brought these feelings back up.
Do I really like Nathan, or do I like the forbidden alluring secrets he brings to the table. In the end, will Nathan be enough for me?
"I like the idea of the two faces, it's already builds up the concept before you even get to hear the music.
"Do you have anything else to show me?" asks James.
"No, but I need to pay a visit to my designer to check on how my dress is coming along." I scramble to my feet and start packing away my belongings. I shove in my pens and book while throwing away the take-away food.
"How is the dress coming along?" he asks.
"Desperate for me to stay?" I tease.
"Curious."
"Just finalised plans for the dress yesterday, so they should be doing the patterns today," I explain.
"Are you excited?"
"For the after party where I can have fun and not worry about making a fool of myself."
"You, a fool, never would have pictured that," he teases.
"I'll see you later." I lean in and give him a tight hug before putting my mask on and heading towards the elevator. I use the mirror to quickly check over my appearance before stepping out into the lobby. I pull my phone out and dial Archer's phone to check where he is.
I walk straight out of the building and find his car waiting outside. I open the back door and slip inside before anyone has the chance to notice.
"Hey Archie, to Lucy's apartment, please." I smile.
"Okay." I take the mask off and stretch out in the back seat.
The drive to Lucy's isn't a long one, but rather short. We end up in front of her building within fifteen minutes, which is good timing for us.
"I'll probably hang with Lucy for a couple of hours," I say.
"Be safe."
"Always am." I tuck my mask into my bag as I leave the car. "See you later."
I take the steps by two, eager to get to see Lucy, excited to see how the dress is coming along. I know the whole thing won't be ready, but I'm curious about the process and how she's finding it. Hopefully she has the material, or an idea for it.
When I make it to her door, I knock loudly and wait patiently. I hear something crash and then a few curse words coming from Lucy's mouth, which makes me laugh. Oh, she's so clumsy sometimes.
"Hello," she says as she opens the door.
"Here to see the dress."
"What about me?" She pouts childishly before smiling brightly, "Dress is looking amazing, can't blame you!"
I walk into the apartment, and then follow Lucy to her bedroom. It looks like a complete mess with the material everywhere, but the doll standing in the middle of the room is the centre piece my eyes are drawn to. She's currently working on the pattern, which looks like a miss matched papers pinned and tacked weird – but if you keep looking – it's a piece of art in itself.
"Looks wicked." I nod my head with approval.
"I've been working like crazy on making this dress and even through it doesn't." She wrinkles her nose, "we've come far."
Wapping my arm around her, I gently squeeze her side and smile with appreciation. I understand art takes time to come together, just look at how I plan and write my albums.
"I think you're doing an amazing job, and I couldn't have asked for anything better."
"Thanks, Riley, I'm really glad you've given me this opportunity."
"You deserve it!"
"Do you want a drink?" she asks, "I could do with another round of coffee."
"Or sleep." I notice the thick purple bags under her eyes. "When did you late sleep?" I question.
"I have a certain goal I want to achieve, sleep can come after that, especially when I get this finishing." She chuckles light heartedly.
"Coffee it is then."
Lucy removes herself and walks into the kitchen to boil the water. I lean against the counter and watch as she walks around gathering cups, coffee and milk. There's a strange noise and some laughing coming from Sasha's room which makes me raise my eyebrow with suspicion.
"Does Sasha have a friend over?" I ask.
"I heard someone else come in, not sure who though." She shrugs effortlessly, "I've been locked up slaving over your dress."
"Fair enough." I can be pretty oblivious to the world when I have my mind set on writing something.
"Sugar?"
"Aren't I sweet enough?" I giggle.
"Very, but do you want sugar?" Lucy hovers the spoon over my cup.
"Two." I pout when she doesn't lighten up from the joke.
Lucy finishes the coffee and pushes the cup in front of me. I thank her and move to sitting down on the small couch in the communal area. The door cracks open and both Lucy and I look at it with curiosity, excited to see who Sasha has hauled up in her room.
When the door opens, a blonde man with stunning blue cobalt eyes appears. I have to contain myself from spitting my coffee back into my coffee. His eyes briefly meet mine before the stunned look of alarm thickly coats his face.
"Excuse me for a second." I hand my coffee to Lucy and bypass Sasha and Nathan so that I can get to the bathroom.
What is Nathan doing here with Sasha? In fact, did I want to know the reasoning behind it? Whatever it is, I feel like I've just ripped my own heart out and trampled on it. Nathan was never mine, and he's free to be with whoever he pleases. Sasha is rather beautiful, I don't blame Nathan for chasing after her.
There's a knock on the bathroom door which pulls me from my thoughts.
"Riley?" Lucy's voice calls out.
My heart breaks even more, it's not Nathan running up to apologise to me. I open the door and let Lucy inside the bathroom.
"Are you okay?" she asks.
"Fine." I remove the stray tear from my cheek. "Why is he here?" Out of all the people in the city, I'm surprised that Sasha and Nathan have become friends. From the way Sasha explains her social standing and expectations in a guy, Nathan doesn't seem like the fitting type she'd go for.
"Nathan has been seeing Sasha on and off for a while," she says.
If trampling on my head hadn't been enough, setting it on fire and dancing circles around it felt fitting to what Lucy had revealed. Why didn't Lucy tell me this information sooner? Especially since we've been hanging out. Why didn't Nathan tell me he had someone sitting on the side as well? Or have I been his side girl? Sitting on the other side of the situation doesn't feel too crash hot.
"I told Nathan he should tell you, Riley, please, it was never any of my business and I didn't want to spread lies."
"I can't believe you would keep this from me." I walk of the bathroom and gather my belongings. Nathan is standing in the lounge room with Sasha, but I don't make eye contact with either of them.
"Thanks for showing me the dress, it looks good." I open the front door and escape out. I don't listen to Lucy's calls of protest, I just need an escape to somewhere else. I take my phone out of my pocket and dial one of the numbers on my recent contact screen.
"Hi Roza, are you free to hang out? I need to talk."