★ I've got arms that long to hold you and keep you by my side.
I've got lips that long to kiss you and keep you satisfied.
If there's anything that you want, if there's anything I can do, just call on me and I'll send it along with love, from me to you★.
.From Me To You. The Beatles.
★★★
Water dripped down his throat as Love eagerly gulped it down; he felt even more out of breath than usual today, could it be possible to get more out of shape than he already was even if he had been doing exercise for days now?
Days!
Love put the bottle down, and shook his head, recovering.
“I hate working out so much!” He whined, frowning at P'Vier, who was looking at him with amusement from a few feet away.
“Is there going to be a day when you don't complain about this?” P’ asked as he got closer.
He took a seat next to Love on the bleachers, just like they had done the other day.
“Maybe” Love said. “But today's not that day”.
P'Vier chuckled.
They were training for Judo once again today until third years were out of class. It had only been twenty minutes, but Love could already feel everyone of his muscles aching and burning. He felt pain in places he hadn't thought it possible before, and every time he moved he wondered how on earth could people like training. There were certainly people who did, people like P'Vier, or P'Tangmo, and Love seriously believed that they were crazy.
Not a day went by in which he didn't regret having decided to start practising Judo so early on the year. Maybe he could just call it off, after all, P'Vier wouldn't really mind.
Today, in the distance, Love could spot some people playing football, so they weren't completely alone for once. The atmosphere hadn't changed, though; the wind was still blowing softly, and the sun was still shining just the right amount; and barely any sounds could be heard apart from the constant smacking of the ball and the occasional complain from the ones playing.
However, what was different today was something else; Love felt anxious. He had always been a relaxed person, one who didn't worry too much if things were going wrong, choosing to do something about it instead of just sitting around for The Universe to intervene.
On this subject, unfortunately, there wasn't much he could do. Since he woke up, he hadn't stopped thinking about P'Tangmo; every time he closed his eyes, he could only see the kisses they had shared the night before. Something had changed, and Love could tell.
It wasn't that they hadn't had more than one kiss in a row before, because they had. Many times. And he couldn't pinpoint exactly what was ticking him off about last night, yet he couldn't help but feel different. He felt different towards the kisses, who he had always welcomed with open arms before, no second questioning or anything; he felt different about his feelings, about the way he had reacted to them, his chest squeezing hard and his heart rate increasing to a hundred miles a minute; and he felt different about P'Tangmo, who Love knew had never been just his best friend, but that until last night he hadn't wanted to think about it further in case he realised what he actually felt.
P'Tangmo was special, he always had been. It didn't take two seconds to realise that the bond the both of them had formed was different than others.
But Love had already put himself out there once, with P'Vier, and it had only ended with a broken heart and many, many tears. And he didn't truly feel like going through that again.
“What's on your mind?” P'Vier's voice startled him out of his thoughts, making Love turn to him.
P’ was looking at him in wonder, as if he was actually trying to decipher what he had been thinking.
Love shook his head. “Nothing, P’”.
P'Vier looked skeptic, his brows raising lightly. He stared at Love for a while, searching all over his face. For what? Love wasn't sure.
“I've been meaning to ask you this for a while, I hope you don't mind.” He started talking, seriousness painted in his face. Love payed attention to him, suddenly fearing what would come out of that mouth. He nodded, encouraging him to continue, as he braced himself for a question he was sure he wouldn't know how to answer. P’ kept his voice even as he asked, and didn't move his gaze away. “What's going on with you and Tangmo?”.
Without his consent, blood flooded his cheeks, his eyes widening.
“Wi – with P'Tangmo?” He repeated, probably more to give himself enough time to think about it than because he hadn't heard him. “Nothing's going on with P’”.
P'Vier stared some more, until a smirk took over his lips. “I see things, Love”.
“What things?” Love asked, because he was sure no one had seen them kiss. And there was no way P'Vier knew what was going on inside his head. “There's no things to see”.
“Well, I beg to disagree with you on that one” P’ replied, letting out a small chuckle, shaking his head. He then gave a long sigh, pursing his lips. “You knew right away that something had changed between Rose and I. How did you know?”.
Love shrugged. “I'm… not sure. I guess I just saw how you looked at her differently than before. How last year you seemed more… guarded. And yet lately, every time you looked at her, you could just tell you were thinking about something”.
P'Vier nodded, accepting the answer. He tilted his head to the side, a small smile greeting Love.
“Well… same, I guess” He said. “Your eyes change when you look at Tangmo. I can tell the difference from when you look at me, for example. Anyone can tell it isn't just, you know, a ‘friendly stare’”.
Love looked away, his eyes back on the football players. He watched them kick the ball a few times, thinking.
If P'Vier could tell so easily that Love felt more for him… then did that mean that P'Tangmo had figured him out as well?
Love felt scared at the thought, because that would mean P'Tangmo was purposely ignoring his feelings by not talking about it, that he didn't feel the same way about him. And Love wasn't ready for a rejection, but he certainly wasn't ready either to lose his best friend. Because above any feeling he was having for P’, his friendship was still the most important thing of all.
Love turned back to P’, who was still staring at him, his eyes kind and understanding. If anyone got how Love felt right now, then that would be P'Vier, who was still longing for the girl of his dreams.
“Is it that obvious?”.
P’ shook his head. “Not really. Not if you are not paying enough attention”.
Love groaned, ruffling his hair in stress.
“I don't want him to hate me, P’. I didn't mean for this to happen, I didn't mean to like him. He just… he's everywhere. I feel him everywhere”.
P’ nodded again, patting Love's back twice. “That's love, pal. It hits you so suddenly you don't have time to react, and then it stucks with you for longer than you want it to. But you can't fight love, no. Love's not meant to be fought, it's meant to be listened”.
Love didn't have time to answer, as a text arrived, telling them that practice was about to begin, so they both gathered their things and left, dropping the subject all together.
At least, dropping it out loud. Because inside of Love's head, all that could be heard – so clearly it was scary – was P'Tangmo's name.
★★★
Love didn't know how, or when, or why, but right now, P'Tangmo's hand was strongly holding his as they walked back to his dorm.
After dance practice, P’ had offered to walk him back, and Love had accepted. However, how had they ended up holding hands was still in the dark to him. Not that he was complaining, but he would like to have a little bit more control when he was around P'Tangmo. After all, there were times that Love felt like if P'Tangmo would ask him to clean his entire bedroom and wash his clothes, he would do it without complaints. And that was not how things were supposed to be, one should be able to say no to someone if they wanted to.
P’ was telling him about how his mum had found out he had helped Love bake cookies, and was now asking him to bake more for her.
“... I shouldn't have told her, really. Now she's going to ask for cookies every time I come home”.
Love chuckled, amused. “Hey, she's your mum. You should always want to bake her cookies”.
P’ rolled his eyes, but a smile stood in its place.
“She can bake cookies too, and she never bakes them for me”.
“Okay, that's fair, I guess” Love agreed. “But you could bake them once in a while, still. I can help you if you want to”.
Love waited for a reply, but P’ had fallen silent. When he looked at him, he was smiling, staring in front of him as they walked. Love didn't want the night to end, yet; he could see his bedroom door a few feet ahead, and disappointment flooded him. His time with P’ always seemed too short, as if time deliberately ticked faster whenever they were together, as if The Universe was laughing at him for having figured out how Love felt, and was taking the piss by quickening the minutes.
Love would stay with him forever if he were given the chance, right next to his P’, happy.
It was almost deadline hour, and P'Good would start checking the hallways soon, so they walked the short distance to his dorm in a hurry, much to Love's displeasure.
P'Tangmo didn't let go of his hand immediately. Instead, he squeezed it, and stared at Love.
“I guess I'll… see you tomorrow, then?” He wondered, a tint of hopefulness heard in his words.
Love nodded, smiling. “Yeah, P’. Tomorrow's friday already, so I'll have to bake the final version of the cookies. And… I need your help with that”.
“Of course, always at your service” P’ joked, the smile on his face never faltering.
“Maybe we can also bake some for your mum as well” Love suggested, the hand that was being held starting to heat up.
He prayed that his cheeks weren't red, he didn't want to give anything away. He hoped the lights were too dimmed to be able to notice if they were.
P'Tangmo chuckled. “Okay”.
And then Love's heart almost leaped when he saw him leaning in, closer and closer. He shut his eyes unconsciously, and waited, and after a few seconds, he felt lips on his cheek, that lingered there. Love could hear his heartbeat so clearly it was worrying, and he couldn't listen anything else than that.
He feared for his sanity as the seconds ticked, and P'Tangmo's lips were still there, and his heart was still hammering, and his whole face felt heated up.
And then his phone beeped in his pocket, and something seemed to break; P’ pulled away, and Love blinked his eyes opened. P’ appeared to be in a daze again, and that was exactly how Love felt too.
He sloppily pulled his phone out, checking the text.
P'Vier:
I saw you going out with Mr. Nothing's Happening.
How did things go?
Love chuckled, typing out a quick response, and putting his phone back. P’ was staring at him when he looked up, his expression changed. He seemed serious, confused.
Love tilted his head to the side in wonder.
“Are you okay, P’?”.
And P'Tangmo only nodded. “Yeah, okay. I'm just tired. I'm going to bed now”.
“Okay. Goodnight, P'Tangmo”.
P’ waved once more and left, leaving Love slightly confused, and worried. When he got inside his dorm, he went to put on his pajamas, and brushed his teeth, and thought. He wondered if P'Tangmo was starting to regret their kisses, if he didn't want them to kiss anymore. After all, he had seemed wary when he had left, perhaps he was starting to realise that what they did with each other wasn't exactly normal friends behaviour, and was trying to pull away.
Because, yes, kisses were nice. But after sharing so many with the same person, could it be possible to still not feel anything?
Love did, yet he doubted P’ did too. Maybe he had found out about his feelings, and wanted to take some distance.
Maybe —
Love heard a knock on the door, and went to get it. He thought it must be P'Good checking on him.
When he opened the door, however, no one was around. He checked to both sides of the hallway and couldn't spot anyone. It wasn't until he was getting back inside that he saw the little package on the floor in front of him.
Love kneeled down and picked it up. There was a note over it that said:
“From Me to You”.
Inside of it, there were cookies.
★★★
How are you all? Hope you had a nice day and wish you a happy weekend to you all!