(Saturday, July 6)
(Saturday, July 13)
"I don't get it. You told me you dance horrible, that didn't look so horrible to me", Chan said in a jokingly shocked way.
"I might have exaggerated with that part, I was being a bit overdramatic just so you would have empathy and not back off on my offer of helping me", I admitted while I was moping the floor after we stayed yet another hour after class. It wasn't as if we stayed to practise, we just played around and dance to some random stuff together.
"You little-" he said with a grin and started walking my way.
I held the mop up for protection and walked a little to the back. "No no, stop", I said as I laughed through my talking. "No time for playing, the place is closing and we still have to vacuum."
"You're lucky today", he said and took the vacuum to clean up the rest.
After I was done with my tasks I let myself flop down against a wall and waited for Chan to finish. It wasn't everyday I saw a guy clean up and the sight was quite funny. I took out my phone and took a picture of him and the clicking sound of it made him look up with a lost look on his face, and I clicked again. "I call this 'payback'", I said referring to the one time in the cafe when he took a picture of me.
"Just you wait", he said and he pulled out the cable of the vacuum cleaner. He started walking towards me and I stood up and tried to run away but obviously I couldn't duck away because he was blocking my way to the door and he pulled me by my wrist and tried to take my phone away from me. "You're gonna delete that picture."
I struggled a lot to keep my phone but eventually won as I held my phone in one hand away from him and my other hand in front of him. "Okey, I'll delete the pictures", I said.
He looked at me with narrow eyes and lightly stepped back. "I need proof."
"You thought!" I said and ran for the door, but he was quick enough to take me by the waist and pull me back. He turned me around and threw me over his shoulder.
"Chan!" I squealed.
"Chris," he said as he held me firmly," are you ever going to call me that from the first time?"
"I have been calling you Chan for all the twenty years I have lived, it's not gonna be that simple to loose that habit", I said. "Now let me go."
"Nope", he said, popping the 'p'. "Not until you delete those pictures."
"Oh so we're playing like that?" I said. "Fine. Delete mine too", I said jokingly and he just gasped loudly. "Have a taste of your own medicine."
"I can't", he said.
"And why is that?" I commented.
"Because-" he said and mumbled something afterwards, but I didn't hear that.
"What was that?" I asked. "I didn't hear you."
"Nothing", he said. "Take your bag, we're leaving", he said as he abruptly put me back on the ground.
"But- cleaning", I said as I pointed at the vacuum cleaner.
He looked at the vacuum cleaner, took it and placed in the storage room. He took his and mine bag and walked to the door not even looking at me.
"Wait are you mad?" I asked confused.
"No. Why would I be?" he said.
"Because I didn't delete your picture? I don't know", I said more in a question.
He just turned back around and smiled at me. "Coffee?"
Ignoring his weird behaviour I just gave him a nod and both of us walked to the car, going to our regular after class cafe visit. "BookCafe?" I asked.
"Always", he said.
I don't know why but his mood changed a bit after this day. He was more quiet and, how do I put it, soft. He would smile at me randomly and no matter what he never rose his voice at me because sometimes while practicing I made mistakes and it would frustrate him, but none of that anymore. He came to my place more often than before and now more for me than for Felix. Felix would come home and if he saw us together he would give me a wink, I would just give him an eye roll. He asked me to come to his place so we could watch the children. But to be honest I didn't understand why, we would mostly just watch a movie together while the children were upstairs. So my hopes rose a bit, could it be that he actually... had interest in me?
Today wasn't any different, he invited me to his house to watch the children and we ended up watching a movie just like it was most of the time. I didn't mind spending my day with him nor did I mind watching a movie every time we were together, it was all just weird. Just think about it, not even a month ago I was this stuttering mess when talking to him and now I am here next to him, the one and only guy that I had an eye on, watching a movie.
It just felt all unrealistic, I was actually able to get this close. Was it inappropriate to think like that? Was it bad if I thought like that? Sometimes in life it's okey to be selfish for once, it's okey to hold something for yourself if it means happiness. And at the moment my happiness was, Chan.
"I should head home", I said after the movie ended.
"You can't stay longer?" And his face just made me want to stay longer there right next to him.
"I can't, I'm sorry. I need to have a better sleeping schedule if I want my skin to be glowing for the wedding", I said.
"Oh okey", he said. "I'll grab my keys."
He dropped me off at my place and just as I was about to leave he held my wrist. "Luna-"
I turned around and looked at him. "Yes?"
"Never mind", he said and loosened his grip on me.
"What's up with you the past few days?" I asked.
"What do you mean?" he said in confusion.
"I don't know, it's just that you have been acting strange lately. Not in a bad way but just in general. And Felix has been acting weird and it feels like Tiffany is also hiding things. I don't know", I said.
He just let out his usual habited breathy laugh and placed his hand on my head and ruffled my hair a bit. "Sometimes you're just a little too clueless."
"And what do you mean with that?" I said as I crossed my arms.
"Nothing." He pointed his fingers in the direction of my house. "Looks like Felix is waiting for you."
"I won't let this slip."
"I know", he said as he just looked back in front of him.
With a glare I left the car and looked at Felix as I walked to the door.
"Why so grumpy?" Felix said.
"I'm not grumpy", I said.
"Sure", he said as we walked inside. "Now tell me, why so moody?"
"I'm not, oh my god", I said rolling my eyes. "I'm just hella confused."
"And why is that?" he said as he slumped on the couch.
"Everybody is being all like mysterious and suspicious but I have no clue what is going one", I said, slumping down next to him.
"You are just clueless and dumb", Felix said with a grin.
"Stop it! Chan said the exact same thing, what is up with you guys? Look the wedding is in about a month don't y'all even dare to stress me out or my skin will have it's breakout point and my sleep rhythm is gonna go downhills. So if you'll excuse me I have to go do my skin routine without someone working on my nerves. I'm sleeping early and please be quiet tonight while playing your games, I'm already sleep deprived and I need my rest", I said while standing up and walking to the stairs.
"At least I have friends to do stuff with", he grumbled.
"Fuck off, Felix. It's not like you have more friends than I do", I defended.
"Go, go get your sleep. You're not yourself. Don't forget to wish your Channie a Goodnight", he said as he blew a kiss in my way, to annoy me.
"Don't make me involve Aria", I dared.
"You wouldn't", he gasped.
"I would", I glared at him. "So when is our Felix going to ask her out, on a real date."
He threw a pillow in my direction but I was quick enough to dodge it and run up the stairs. I laughed on my way up and entered my room with a smile. I did my nightly skin care just for the sake of the wedding, otherwise I would never, and prepared to go to bed.
For yet another few days everything felt so weird. I felt as if everyone was hiding something from me. I would have thought maybe a birthday party but my birthday is not even close.
I tried to get things out of Felix but the only thing he said was that I was clueless or just plainly dumb. Tiffany was no help either, the only thing she would do is smirk and change the topic. Let me not start about Chan, he would just ignore it, as if I hadn't said or asked anything at all, and just like Tiffany, change the topic.
With a puff I slumped down on my bed after putting every possible skin care product to stop my skin from breaking out. My phone made a sound, noting me that I had a message. I took it and saw it was Chan.
Chan: Hey Luna, I have a question.
Me: Ask away.
Chan: What do you think about going to the fair with me, Wednesday 7 O'clock?
Me: Wednesday? So suddenly.
Chan: Just one night. Not even 5 hours, maybe.
Me : Is anyone else coming along? Like Felix or...
Chan: Nope... Just you and me.
For a second I just looked at my screen. Just you and me. Can't possibly mean anything, right?
Me: Oh, just you and me?
Chan: Yeah, kinda like that.
Me: It's not like I have anything better to do on Wednesday, so sure 7 it is.
Chan: Right. Then I'll pick you up at 7 on Wednesday?
Me: Jup.
Chan: Nice! Goodnight, Luna.
Me: Goodnight, Chan.
(11:05)
I looked at my phone, silent as ever. Going to a fair as in a... a date? That can't possibly be it. No Chan- no. I cannot allow myself to get my hopes too high. I shouldn't get ahead of myself. Chan probably doesn't like me that way and he wants to go out just to relax. But on the other hand he could have asked Felix instead of me, that should mean something right?
Frustration rose inside of my head and I just confused myself more and more. What was going on? What was happening between us? Was Chan onto something? Was he into me? Or was he just being friendly? He had always been a bit of a flirt, he probably does this to a lot of girls. What could make me possibly different?
"What's making you stare so ugly at your wall? What did the wall ever do wrong to you?" Felix said from my door.
"I'm thinking", I said not looking up at him.
"About?"
"None of your business", I snapped.
"Hmm, remember that one time you told me you would tell me everything. Good days to lie to your brother", Felix fake cried.
"Felix, get the fuck out", I looked at him with a confused expression. "Why are you so damn weird?"
"Guess Chan and you have been talking hmm. By looking at your face I can already tell", Felix said.
"Felix what are you saying?" I said not actually wanting him to answer that.
"You see you have this particular facial expression when we are talking about Chan, you have that expression now. You purse your lips a bit and your eyes are just a bid wider than normal and your eyebrows rise. Oh and let's not forget about how you start biting your inner lip. I know you Luna. Good enough to tell that it was Chan you were thinking about", he pointed out.
"I don't care what you know", I said actually caring, I hate it that he knows me so well.
"So," he said as he walked closer in my direction," you wouldn't care if I did this." He snatched my phone from my bed running to his room with it. I ran behind him but he locked his door before I could even leave my room.
"Felix open your door and give me my phone!" I screamed and banged the door.
"Ooh, a date with Chris I see", he said and I could hear the joy in his voice.
"It's not a date you idiot", I said.
"Of course it isn't", and I could basically hear his eye roll(if you know what I mean).
"Give me my phone!" I screamed again.
All of a sudden the door opened and Felix gave me my phone without complaining or trying to run away with it.
"That was too easy", I said as I looked at him as he walked downstairs.
"You want me to take the phone back then?" he asked,stopping midway the stairs.
"No."
"Then stop talking", he said as he walked back down again.
I returned back to to my room allowing myself to fall on my bed. I crawled under the blankets and tried to sleep.
A night out, with Chan. Was I perhaps dreaming already?