song for this chapter // think about us - little mix
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"Laura, I wouldn't be asking if I didn't want you there." Rydel spoke through the phone. "It's really important to me that you come. We used to be so close, and just because Ross lost you again doesn't mean I want to."
I sighed. It was Rydel's birthday this weekend and she wanted me to come to her big party. Last year at this time, Ross and I were still together, so attending her birthday was no problem. But I knew that this year would be different.
"You can bring someone if you want. A plus one. It doesn't have to be a date, bring Raini if you want. Or Annie." Rydel offered. I knew Raini was busy, but Annie might not be.
Now, you're probably wondering who Annie is.
About a year ago, I started working at Republic Records as a song writer. Annelise was one of my co-workers, and after we met, we were inseparable. She was supposed to be a bridesmaid at my wedding, but, after everything happened, well, you know.
She was one of my favourite people. She was there when I wouldn't stop crying, but she had also been there when I couldn't stop laughing.
"Okay, I'll ask Annie if she wants to come." I said quietly. "Yes! Laura that's great news. Ross is bringing Jaz, I think, but don't think anything of it. Jazz is super sweet and there's nothing going on between them, so don't feel weird or li-" "Rydel. I don't need to hear that. It's been months now. He can do what he wants." I cut her off.
The other end of the line was silent for awhile, and I sighed. "I didn't mean to interrupt, I just, I'm sick and tired of everyone babying me. I can handle Ross myself. You don't need to worry about me." I said, trying to convey a soft tone.
"Right. No, I'm sorry Laura. And I respect that. I'll see you Saturday then?" She asked, and I sighed. "Yes, but I can't promise I'll be there for long. I have to go into the studio on Sunday morning." I said softly.
With that, we said our goodbyes and hung up the phone. With a sigh, I glanced at myself in the mirror. I was sitting on my bed, wearing an oversized t-shirt and sweatpants, my hair falling out of a poorly made messy bun. I was in no space to go out. I hadn't gone out with friends in months. The closest I ever came was having girls night with Annie and Raini the odd Friday.
I felt like I had just made the biggest mistake. I groaned and fell down on the bed, ignoring the fact that the t-shirt I was wearing used to be Ross's.
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"Laur, are you sure?" Annie asked me, as we pulled up outside of Rydel's house. I shrugged. "It's not like I have to be here for long. Just long enough to be polite." I responded, turning off the car engine. "Have you seen them all, since..?" Annie trailed off and I felt myself cringe.
"No." I let out and Annie put her hand on my shoulder. "I'm right here for you. I hope you know that." Annie said, and I nodded. "I know." I smiled at her. We both got out of the car and walked to the front door. Annie knocked and a few moments later, Rydel opened it up, Savanah right behind her. "Laura." A smile took over her face and she engulfed me in a hug.
"Hi Del." I said, feeling my own smile tugging at my lips. "I'm so glad you came. Really. You know Savannah, right?" Rydel said, gesturing to the girl standing behind her. "Of course. Riker's a lucky guy." I smiled at her. She smiled sweetly back at me. "Thanks, Laura." She said, reaching out to wrap me in a hug.
"This is Annie." I said, gesturing towards my friend, who they both gladly hugged and then ushered us out into the backyard. I gulped when I saw all of the people in front of me. I saw Rocky talking with Riker and another guy, who was probably a friend of theirs through music. I saw Courtney and Savannah, two of Rydel's best friends, and I saw Ross, sitting at a picnic table, deep in conversation with Jaz.
"You okay?" Annie asked, wrapping her shoulder around my arms. "Yeah. I think I am, actually." I sighed and walked over to the drink table.
"Laura!" I heard a familiar voice call. I turned around to see Riker walking over to me. "Long time no see! It's been months, how are you?" Riker said, smiling at Annie and me. "I've, uhm. I've been okay. You?" I asked, and I saw the sympathy in his eyes.
"Laura, I'm so sorry. Really. You didn't deserve it." Riker whispered. I shook my head. "It's in the past now Riker. All I can do is move forward." I admitted, and Annie smiled sympathetically at me. "I get it. You're doing great, by the way. Your music is stellar and you look really good. I'm proud of you, Laura." I couldn't help but smile at his sweetness. Riker had always been nice to me.
I'd been through a lot with all of them, and it was hard to believe that I had gone so long without speaking to them. I had forgotten that they felt like family.
They were supposed to be my family in-law, I thought to myself.
I shook the thought away and thanked him before turning to get myself a drink. Annie had gone to talk with others at the party, so I was solo for now.
"Hi." A shy voice said from behind me and I nearly jumped. "Oh my gosh, I didn't mean to scare you. I'm sorry!" The voice said and I turned around to see who it was. Jaz.
"That's okay." I said, a bit coldly, turning back to finish making my drink. "Look, Laura. I just don't want you to hate me. You're a really amazing girl and I just don't want there to be any hard feelings." Jaz explained. I turned back to her. "Why would there be any hard feelings?" I asked. "Well, because you used to be with Ross, and now I am. I just want us to be friends, if that's okay." She asked sincerely. A million thoughts swirled around in my head.
Rydel said they weren't together. She lied. Just to get me to come to this party.
I forced a smile at Jaz. I appreciated that she was trying to make an attempt. "No hard feelings." I said quietly before walking into the house. I felt like I was going to collapse.
It'd been only a matter of months and he'd already moved on. And what did I have to show? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. I tried to stop tears from falling but quickly realized it was useless as I stood in the dimly lit kitchen and began to cry. Who was I kidding? I wasn't ready for this. I needed to leave.
I texted Annie that I was going to leave, and she immediately responded saying that she'd find her own way home, since some of her friends from the music industry were here, so she wanted to stay. I sighed and walked out the front door of the house to my car. I felt bad that I hadn't even bothered to say bye to Rydel or Riker, or anyone else, but I just couldn't function anymore. Luckily the tears had stopped, but I was still in a weak state of mind.
"You're leaving?" a voice called from behind me as I was two feet out the door. I turned on my heel to face the voice I knew all too well. "Yeah. I'm sorry, is that your business? Because last time I checked, it wasn't." I spat. Ross held up his hands in defense. "Chill. I was just coming out here to grab my charger from my car. You don't need to be rude." He said, brushing past me. I stood there stunned, watching him walk to his car and retrieve a charger.
I narrowed my eyes at him. How could he act like we'd barely ever met. How?
"Do you even think about us?" I suddenly said, before I could stop myself. "We, quite literally went through hell and back together, and you just turn your cheek? Is that even humanly possible?" I said through gritted teeth. He lifted his head to look at me. "We weren't right for each other Laura. You shouldn't have to go through hell in a relationship. And clearly, whatever we went through, we couldn't withstand anyway. I'm happier now and I'm sure you are too." He said, closing the door to his vehicle.
"So if I brought a date to this party you wouldn't have even cared?" I asked, waiting for his reaction. He didn't respond immediately, but instead shrugged. "What kind of a question is that, Laura?" Ross scoffed, walking back over to me. "You know I'm bothered by Jaz. I'm asking you if you would have been bothered if I brought a date with me today." I repeated. Ross fumbled around with the charger in his hands.
"I wouldn't have cared." He said. I could see a hint of denial in his eyes.
"Bullshit." I said, stepping closer to him. "You can't just pretend you don't care about me or what I do. We were supposed to be married a matter of months ago, for god's sake. I don't care what kind of act you put on, I know you're still effected. I know you would have been upset if I came here with someone." I said boldly, watching anger rise in his eyes.
"No, I wouldn't have. And here's why, Laura. I've moved on. I accepted that we weren't supposed to be together. It was a toxic relationship and you need to let it go. Fuck. You can't keep doing this. We can't keep doing this. It's time for us to be adults and face the music. Our little fairytale isn't real. Learn to accept it."
With that he walked past me and into the house, a trace of bitterness following behind him. I stood there processing his words, not even realizing he had come back out the front door.
"I'm willing to accept that my family really likes you, especially Rydel, and they don't deserve to lose you from their lives just because we didn't work out. They've been harping on me for months. So let me personally invite you out to dinner with all of us this Thursday. We're celebrating Rydel's birthday in a family setting and she'd like you there. Jaz will be there as well. So, might I suggest finding a date, Laura, so you can prove that you're not stuck in the past anymore." He fumed, his angered words slapping me in the face before his brunette-dyed head turned around and stormed back into the house.
I stood there feeling like I'd been punched in the stomach. There was no way I could do that. I couldn't even handle this party, let alone dinner.
And yet, I knew there was no other option. I had to go.
And I needed a date.
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hi guys
okay so first of all, I love u
and second of all, this story is gonna be a bit more intense at times than the first two books were. ive matured a lot since I wrote those, and so has my writing.
ive also changed the cover to something a bit more intense so let me know what u think!
okay, now, howd you like it???? comment comment comment! I love ur comments so so much !
next update will be ASAP. im doing my best, friends <3 love u long time
see u next update. all my love,
haileexoxo