"You have to go, everyone is so excited to have you back Maiz." Shelly begs me to go to the party tonight, yes party. Ben said Josh would've wanted a party to celebrate his life nothing sad. But I just don't feel right going, especially considering the fight I just had with Spike and the on on going tension with Derek. "I really don't feel good Shell." I tell her hoping she gives up, but I'm not that lucky.
"I know you and Spike had a fight but-" I cut her off standing up from the bed. "We didn't have a fight, he fought but I didn't. He came at me." I defend myself crossing my arms like a pouting toddler. I don't want to see either Derek or Spike tonight. I have no energy to fight with either of them.
"Okay okay you're right but still-" she pauses taking both my hands into hers "we want you there, we all want you there. You're apart of this messy family Maiz." She hugs me tightly "plus I already picked you out an outfit." It's like she reads my mind, that was my next excuse. "Fine okay I'll go." I huff and she drags me towards the closet to find the outfit she chose for me.
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Derek's pov
"To Josh, our brother and friend." I say holding up the glass of champagne "may he Rest In Peace."
"To Josh!" The pack echos raising their glasses before roasting. This is not what I expected for a funeral, but Josh wasn't like everybody else. He was the life of the party. So what better way for him to go besides a party.
The DJ starts the music back up as I step off the stage embracing members of the pack as I walked by. Grabbing another glass of bourbon after downing the glass of champagne.
"Easy big guy." Spike says lowly in my ear wrapping his arm around my neck. I shake my head shoving his arm off. "Have you seen her?" I question my eyes darting around the back garden. "No, she's avoiding me too remember?" I glare at him sharply still slightly annoyed about his argument with Maize the day before.
"Shelly will bring her, she has a way of convincing." Spike assures "we both just need to give her some space right now." He adds "she isn't in a good headspace and if we keep pushing we will loose her D." Deep down I know he is right but I can't stop myself from fighting for her, I want to be there for her. "I know." I say simply. "I know."
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Maizes POV
I hold the glass of champagne in my hand tightly as Shelly pulls me towards the buffet, I don't remember the last time I've kept down a full meal. Which probably makes sense as to why a few glasses of champagne is making me way more tipsy than normal.
"Can hybrids still get drunk?" I whisper to Shelly as she fills our plates with finger foods. She turns to me smirking "yes, just takes a bit more alcohol." She laughs "are you already tipsy?" I shake my head grabbing the plate of food from her before downing the rest of my glass. "Just for future knowledge." I shrug walking towards one of the tables leaving Shelly behind.
I'm wearing a pair of dark wash skinny jeans and a black tank top that's nearly too small and shows way too much cleavage, and a pair of these god awful nude high heels I can barely walk in. But I'm making it work, for Shelly's sake. "I got this." I whisper to myself confidently, this platform will be the death of me but I refuse to not eat at the table. Mainly because Shelly will skin me alive if I make a mess with this outfit on.
I'm halfway up the ramp when I trip and loose my balance. The food crashes to the floor and I go tumbling off the side of the platform. I already hear people running after me.
"I'm okay!" I shout trying to laugh off the situation and not make it into a huge ordeal. I feel his hand grip my arm and pull me up. My eyes locking with his. "I said I'm fine." I say tugging away from him but he doesn't let up. "Derek." I warn "I'm not doing this, not now. Not here."
There is group watching this unfold closely making my cheeks go red with embarrassment. "Then where?" He questions harshly "when?" He adds just as cold, the alcohol on his breath is strong. "I miss you can't you see that?" He says barely above a whisper, his eyes glowing with pain.
"I cannot do this with you." I say pulling my arms from him and walking across the yard towards the back door. I know he is following me I can feel his heat behind me.
We reach the living room and he slams the patio door closed behind, I'm determined to get as far away from him. I don't want to have this fight.
"Don't walk away from me!" He bellows almost roaring, his eyes glowing red. I turn to him aggravation clear on my face. I huff lowly before sitting on the couch crossing my arms, I don't dare to look his way, I fixated my gaze on a panting on the wall instead.
"Look at me." He growls making me hate this side of him even more, alpha Derek is not my favorite, never has been. I snap my head to him meeting his red eyes. We stay that way for what feels like forever, him standing across the room.
"Why did you run?" He finally speaks and I don't even want to answer. It's not worth it, he will never get it. No matter how many times I say it, he just won't. "Why!" He shouts slamming his hands down against the coffee table, it shatters beneath his fist.
"I COULD'VE KILLED YOU DEREK!" I shout standing up my heels crunching against the glass below. My body begin to heat up. "You don't get it! You're so hard headed. I did it for you! For your safety!" I scream frustration spilling from my lips.
"I don't need you to protect me! I need you to love me Maize!" He yells stepping closer to me. His face filled with just as much anger, his eyes still piercing red. "I did it because I love you! I would rather be apart then ever put you at risk like that again. I'm dangerous Derek, we are dangerous." I sigh shaking my head and backing away.
He grabs my hand pulling me back to him and for a moment I let my body relax in his touch. "We will work on it Maize, we will find you the best trainer in the world. We can fight this, we have to fight this. I can't lose you." He pleads kissing my hands and I can feel myself melting into him.
I shake my head my eyes pricking with tears "I can't," I whisper "I killed people." I murmur the images haunting me. "I'm not the girl you fell in love with Derek, you don't even know her anymore."
"They were going to kill us. You saved us, you are so strong my love. Don't you see that?" He states "I know who you are. You are the girl I love. Nothing has changed. I know you maize, I know your heart." He breathes his face so close to mine. "We can do this," he whispers "fight for us."
His lips press against my lightly and I have the urge to pull back, to push him as far away as I can. To keep my wall up. But I'm weak against his touch. Leaning into his kiss. "I love you" he mutters kissing my cheeks, then my neck all the way to my shoulders. He is holding me so tightly scared to let go. He kisses every visible inch of me. "Let me show you how much?" He asks his hands holding mine. I nod softly as he tugs me up the stairs to our room.
He closes the door with his foot as he holds me in his arms. Kissing me so intensely my heads spins, he throws me on to the plush bed kissing up my stomach as he undress me. "God I've missed you." He moans as I pull off his shirt, and begin to unbutton his pants. "Kiss me" I whimper softly and he does so gladly. He leaves a trail of kisses down my neck towards my breast.
"Baby," I say breathlessly and his eyes shoot up at me glowing his beautiful blue. "Say it again." He demands kissing down my stomach. "Baby" I moan gripping his hair as he goes lower. "Oh my god Derek!"
"That's it baby say my name." He purrs lowly in my ear biting every so lightly. "I wanna make love to you." He states waiting for me approval. All I can do is nod pulling him closer to me as I bring his lips back to mine. Wrapping my legs around his waist tightly. I've missed this, I've missed him but I don't have the voice to tell him. So I let him continue soaking up every second of his touch, every inch of his body, every kiss.
I finally feel something other than raging guilt, for a moment I feel love and passion. It's an overwhelming feeling and I can't stop myself from crying.
"Baby?" Derek says worry filling his voice as he stops his movements, pulling out of me and pulling me towards him so I'm sitting in his lap. "What's wrong?" He asks wiping the tears from my eyes as I shake my head. "Keep going." I beg trying to pull him back down on me but he won't budge.
"No You're crying. Why are you crying?" He is so confused and so concerned. "It just feels good, I feel good." I cry smiling at how ridiculous sound "this is the first time I feel something besides guilt."
"What do you feel?" He questions his hands moving the hair from my face. "Love." I murmur finally getting him to lay back down. "Keep going." I assure before kissing him again.