My heart was beating quickly, my palms was sweating. Adrian.
What is Adrian doing here ?? What did he come here for ? Did he come to tell me someing ?? How did he know where I was?
"Adrian." my voice was weak like my legs.
I couldn't walk. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move.
"Sophia?" I stared deep into his blue eyes I missed so much but could only dream about.
"Yeah?" I answered, still staring at him with disbelief
He hasn't changed much. Just his clothes and he's gotten a little taller too.
"Okay, I'm going to leave you youngsters alone." and grandma left. Leaving me. With the love of my life.
We were silent. It felt a little awkward.
Come on Sophia your not weak anymore, your strong. You can do this.
I found my ability to walk and made my way torwards the side of the porch and sat on the swing . Staring into the woods. Watching the night sky
"Wow. Sophia you look-"
"How did you know I was here?" I needed to be strong. If Corey thought he could take the one thing anyway from me than his wrong.
"Well, the night of the party, I followed you after Corey was asking for you. I didn't know why but I felt like I had to." he stared at a brown box he had in his hand.
I don't have nightmares like I used to anymore. So whenever someone bring that night up, it doesn't effect me.
"And then you lead me to this place and I watched you get inside the house. I needed to know that you were safe." he looked up at me and then looked back down to the floor.
He looked to the side and he noticed my scarred arm. "What's that on you arm?"
I felt ashamed. I wanted to hide it from him, but I decided I have nothing to hide anymore. All my right to live was taken from me along with my innocence.
"Why would you do this to yourself?"
I was silent. His voice was unhappy "Why-"
"Because they hurt me. Because for the last 16 years I've spend were hell for me. While your all buddy buddy with Corey and having fun and enjoying your life, I was getting abused at home and school."
I can feel my tear coming out but I needed to say strong. I'm not weak anymore, I can do this.
"I was on the edge of losing everything, including my life. I thought everyday of my life they wake up one morning and say they're sorry and just love me like a family should."
Adrian stayed silent.
"But they didn't love me, nor did they apologize for destroying my morals to live like a normal child. And just when things couldn't get worse, I was taken like some rag doll."
"They took me. And I called your name, so many times to save me. But you never came."
"Do you know what it's like it get fucked by people you don't love? Chanting, hoping, and preying that it was just a dream. Holding on to the one thing that kept you going and to have it taken away from you like it was nothing. Like you were nothing."
I snapped my fingers. My leg was shaking. I wasn't sorry for myself. I was angry.
Angry that I couldn't defend myself. Angry that noone heard my cries. I was angry at the fact that he didn't know, who they are. . . his friends, his closest friends at that.
He didn't know. And I don't think it was my place to tell him. And if it was, we wouldn't be the same.
"Who did it . . . tell me. I want to help you and be there for you." he sounded honest and his eyes were deseparate to find out.
I just shook my head "If I told you, you wouldn't believe me." I whispered.
He grabed my elbow, our bodies were so close even the wind couldn't come between. "I would believe you, I just need you to trust me enough to tell me."
"Trust is earned, never giving." I moved away from him and stood on the other side of the porch.
It was quite for awhile. Only sound there was, was trees rustling with the wind and crickets chirping. Then he chuckled.
"What's so funny?" I rose my eyebrow.
"It's just. . . wow. . . your hair looks-"
"Yeah crazy I know " I rolled my eyes with a grin on my face.
Adrian sat down next to me. "I was gonna say interesting. I like it, you look. . . different. It could take some getting used too but I like it."
"Yeah, tell me about it." we both laughed. "Soo how have you been other wise ?"
"Okay, just working with a dad."
"Ooh really? What job do you have?" Sarcasm was all over that question.
"I work in the garage, working on cars . . .the usual" sounded convincing for a moment.
"You and cars? I never seen you work a day in your life." We both start laughing.
"I work with a real-estate company. . .with your mom." he stared at me for a reaction.
"Oh, that's good. Work hard for your money." I gave him a smile.
He wasn't getting any reaction out of me. He needs to make money. He always broke.
"So what you've been up too? You seemed to have disappeared from the earth." he said.
"Yeah. . . I think it's the best thing for me right now after everything. I needed a break."
"So you going back to school or your switching? You know ."
"I'll go back to school and finish. Tranferring is too much right now."
"Wow. I gotta say, your the most strongest person I've known to still go back to that school, knowing what they did to you."
"Yeah. My grandma said time heals everything, so I forgive but I never forget." I stared into the sky.
Gosh it must be amazing to fly in the night. The star surrounding you, comfortable silence was in the air as the wind blow my hair.
"Umm. . . Sophia?"
"Yeah" staring into the night sky, the wind felt nice against my skin.
He had a long pause. I didn't realize what he was doing until I turned to face him and he was blushing.
Adrian. Blushing for me. This had my heart melting.
"I ummm. . . well. . i wanted. . . . to know . . . if you me . . "
"Adrian do you like me ? I mean really do you like like me? Even from before ?"
He was scratching the back of his head, while his face was turning into a strawberry red. "Well . . I . . .ummm. . "
"I'll take that as a yes. And yes . . . ummmm. . .whats today?"
Adrain was staring at my wide eye "Wednesday. . ."
"Friday night, pick me up at 8."
"Really?"
"Yeah." I sent him a smile.
I got up and headed torwards the door "Sophia wait . . ."
I stopped like a robot and turned. "Yeah."
He handed me a box " Happy birthday." he gave me a nervous smile.
I guess he wanted me to open it infront of him, so I did.
I stood there staring that the present.
It was two small photos, one was when we were little, i kissed him on the check and he kissed me back. I slowly sat back down on the swing. I started laughing that the memories.
I look at the other one was a photo of him sitting down. I took this picture when I was in the year book. It was fall, he sat down on the bench wearing his vest and polo boots. The background was perfect, because of the different kinds of oranges around him. Leaves were all around him and I made him laugh, and his eye colour pop out the most.
I never put it in the year book because they said it wasn't good enough. They threw it away and I never saw it again.
" Sophia . . ."
"Where did you get this? They threw this away. This was my first picture, I ever took and my favorite one." i stare up at him.
"I had to dig, and make a few calls. The pictures are for the locket, you can-"
I kissed him. I kissed Adrian.
It took everything in me to kiss him. My arms wrap around his neck, my stomach full of butterflies. I could tell he was shock, but he wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me closer to him.
I wanted him more than ever. I removed my lips from his "Thank you."
Adrian let go and he took the pictures and opened the locket and the note fell out. He stared at me as I picked up the note.
"Did you read it?"
"Nope. . . I'm just waiting for the right time to do it." I picked up the note and gave it to him.
He took the pictures and placed them in my locket it.
He kissed the locket and then placed his fingers on my face, like he was taken in my image and kissed me sweetly. He held my body tightly against me, gosh this boy is made out of stone. I didn't mind it, at all.
But I have to stop this, I can't give him the impression that he can play with my heart. I need to take control of this.
"See you friday at 8" i let go of him and i walked inside without a back glance.
I went into the kitchen and finished my milk and cupcake.
"Night grandma." She kissed me on my forehead and I went to my bedroom.
Everything in my room was black in my room. From the walls to the bathroom. This is how I like it now. Dark, just like my heart.
My room was big. Bigger than my room at my old house. Well fuck those bastards I actually have games and clothes that fit me.
I got up from my bed and opened my window. I went to my dress and opened the last draw at the down. My stash of weed.
I rolled my joint and lit it up. I was never into smoking until 2 months ago, I only do it for stress but it feels so good i rather do it everyday.
Grandma doesn't know, grandpa used to be a smoker and she hated it.
I puffed out smoke in the windy air. I was feeling relaxed now. I can't believe in havn't done this shit before.
I took in a long drag, flicked the joint, and fell asleep after that.