##; | january 25th,, 2019.
rosey sat alone in the corner of a practice room in indonesia, the group having traveled down to the area following their show in thailand. she was leaning against the wall, her white sleeve-covered arms resting on her crossed legs.
rosey disliked being in charge of her own vlives. she felt considerably more at ease when there was another person present because they could initiate conversations. as she waited for the live to begin, her mind wandered, her gaze stuck on the rising watching count. in her head, she continuously practice how she would greet the supporters.
comments began to fill the screen, zooming up too quickly for her to make out sentences. her fingers slowed the comment section as she leaned in closer to the screen.
"are you ready for the concert?" rosey read, "oh, yes! i'm really looking forward to it!"
her hand slide back to her lap as she answered the question with a smile. she expressed her excitement at the prospect of meeting their local supporters and expressed her gratitude for their supporters.
rosey's gaze was drawn to a single comment she found in a split second.
"where is jeongin?"
her boyfriend, jeongin, was in a lot of her vlives. he was a source of comfort for her and conversing with him was easy. her gaze fluttered across the room, eventually settling on one of her managers, who shrugged when asked the question.
"i'm not sure. . . he was with me before we started the live, but he went into the room next door to practice," she spoke gently, almost cutting herself off by pulling back her tone.
one of her concerns was stumbling over her korean while speaking; even though she was pretty fluent, it was embarrassing when she made a mistake. she'd be followed by the moment all day.
rosey wanted to spend her time running around, talking, and having fun. it was difficult, however, because she didn't have her members with her. she'd always find herself chasing them, making inside jokes with them, and so on.
her hands came to her face, stroking the white tips of her sleeves on her cheeks. her pout, from missing her members, suddenly evolved into a smile. she was silently laughing at herself for not being able to figure out what do to on her own.
"when the others aren't here, it's not as much fun." when her hands briefly covered her face,, she laughing quietly.
"hi! have you read any fanfic?"
"do you have a twitter account?"
"why are you making an idol look at fanfic? know your limits!"
rosey cocked her head as she read the numerous comments, all of which were related to the same topic. the word that kept repeating was "fanfic".
she was certain she understood what it meant. despite her busy schedule and being the idol in these writings, she came across a few fanfics while scrolling through twitter. some were "fine" to come across, while others forced her to exit the app right away.
her hand moved to her head and pushed her hair behind her ear.
"i do have a twitter account, it's nabibirosey! however, i don't post very often." she spoke honestly, "fanfic? fanfic is. . . well, i've come across some. at least, i believe i have?"
rosey's mind had become jumbled as a result of the constant information being given to her and confusion had settled over her. the commenters were using words that she was certain the writing community was more familiar with than she was. angst, fluff, and much more, all to a bigger extent than the actual meaning.
"stays keep asking me to read this fanfic," her lips naturally pouted and her eyes appeared glossy due to the lighting in the room, "is this one bad? i don't know the difference with these words."
she turned the available phone to the screen of the vlive, showing the people watching. the phone displayed words she didn't understand, such as angst and smut. her index finger pointed to the word.
"what is this?"
she returned her attention to the phone and glanced up at the comments.
"she's adorable, and that pout!!"
"please don't; it will taint your innocence!"
the phone in her hand rang and it was one of her members calling her. the call abruptly ended before her finger could press the green answer button. she unlocked her phone and went to text jeongin, who has ended the call.
"you called?" she texted.
the three dots indicated that the boy was responding, but nothing came through after a few minutes. rosey's gaze shifted between the phone that was recording her and the one in her hands, her face flushed with confusion. she swiped away from the messages and went in search of her twitter app.
"ok, fanfic. . . twitter," she murmured to herself.
she opened the blue app, typed in the words suggested by fans, and began skimming through various writings. the numerous results that appeared left her scrolling indefinitely and a small 'o' shape formed on her lips.
rosey chose the first fanfic she thought was good enough to read in her head and clicked it. the first sentence mentioned something happening between her and jeongin, her eyes widening and her gaze rising to the vlive screen.
she was about to tell the fans what she was thinking when the door to the practice room swung open.
chan, her leader, stood in the doorway. the girl in the corner noticed him panting as he appeared to be recovering from his run. he began to approach her.
"i know you're having a good time, but we're not doing this today." chan said sternly.
she placed her phone on the floor beside her, her hands clasped against her chest as if she was afraid she had done something wrong.
"fanfic. . . let's just say we shouldn't be reading this," he spoke loudly for the first half and then whispered, "not as idols."
chan picked up the phone next to her leg and wiped out of the app, completely resetting it. he clutched the tiny box in his hands and waved it side to side. he crouched beside her, barely visible in the frame, and began speaking to the viewers.
"i understand it's fun to do these things," he said, holding up her blank phone, "but you guys know your boundaries, don't take advantage of her."
the vlive was ended in response to a problem that arose when fans persuaded rosey to read fanfic. chan ended the livestream by himself and returned her phone to her possession a few moments later.
"what do you think the rest of the sentence was going to say?" she propped her head on her soft hands.
"i have no idea," chan shrugged, "and i'd like to keep it that way."
her head slowly nodded in time with his words. it was always a mystery to her why fans were so obsessed with making little writings about their idols. however, a minor response would occasionally emerge.
some people are so engrossed in their own world that they need to express themselves through writing, while others do it to pass the time and entertain others.
"come on, you should join us for practice. fortunately, we are nearly finished."
he extended his hand to assist her in standing up, which she accepted. she talked about the hotel they were staying in and practice coming up as she pulled herself up. it was like her mind had completely transformed in a matter of seconds.
"i'm not sure how i'm going to get back to the hotel from here." rosey admitted.
"you don't?" he answered.
rosey was simple conversing with herself. she noticed the large windows with views of the vast and beautiful nature outside. the hotel was completely out of mind now, she was memorized.