The first thing Chris did was give Robyn the medicine Doctor Samuel gave him before he stripped himself of his clothing then Robyn of hers. He looked at her body as she stood before him nude; she was absolutely gorgeous, he couldn't say it enough. He always was fond of her curves, and how thick she was. It seemed her legs were his biggest weakness because he often imagined being between them. Perfect length and so soft. It turned him on but that wasn't his purpose, not now. He carried her to the bathtub where he washed her thoroughly and diligently making sure she was clean and ridden of the stench of alcohol. She sat in front of him at ease as he touched her skin softly and carefully. She was surprisingly wide awake, groggy, and out of energy but awake nonetheless.
"I'm sorry, Reeses."
"Buttercup, it's fine don't worry about it. Just relax and let me take care of you, okay?"
She nodded. "I'm just tired, you know? I'm just tired." She said quietly. He kissed the back of her neck before getting them both out the bathtub and ready for bed. He didn't know what he would wake up to, but he hoped that she would be herself soon.
-
Sudden sprays of rain rattled gustily against the windows. Never did she move from her spot; lying on the bed, in the darkness. She forgot the meaning of brightness and what it looked like. Between the darkness filling the room, and the darkness in her soul. Her constant disregard towards her health was slowly taking a toll as the symptoms in her illness got worse. Chris wasn't any better, but because he did what he could, his health was fine. He was responsible for himself and Robyn. He understood that while Robyn wasn't at 100% these days he had to carry the load. He didn't mind because he knew relationships were hard work. As long as it was Robyn, he would carry the world on his back.
He sighed. "Robyn, you can't keep doing this, it's been a week."
She said nothing. "Baby Girl, please. This isn't healthy, you need to take care of yourself. You can't heal this way." She blinked slowly but still said nothing. Chris sighed and watched her helplessly. He was patient giving her the space she needed, but was still close by if she needed him.
"Robyn——"
"You know," she said before pausing, coughing wildly and holding her chest. "I thought I was going to be able to handle this. At the hospital, I cried, but I was happy because Gran Gran was happy. She was so peaceful it was almost like she was sleeping. It didn't hit me she was really dead until today." He listened intently wanting to see where this was going.
"I can't do this anymore, Chris."
"Can't do what?"
"This. Life. It isn't—— I can't."
"Buttercup, you have to help me understand."
"There will never be a happy ending. How can I be happy? The only thing that's promised in life is a death certificate. That doesn't make me happy. I'm not happy."
"Buttercup..."
"Chris, think about it," she sat up and looked at him for the first time. Her eyes were red, dreary. She looked drained, and this wasn't the Robyn he had grown accustomed to knowing. But in order to be worthy of her rhythm, he had to deal with her blues. "We've talked about everything. Marriage, life, and children. If we have kids, they're just going to suffer like we're suffering. You don't say anything, but I know you're in pain. This whole thing is painful. I can't do this, Chris. We can't do this."
"Robyn..."
"No, Chris–––"
"STOP."
She jumped at the boom of his voice and stayed silent. He didn't want to raise his voice, but that was the only way to get her to stop talking. "Robyn, stop saying shit like that. If you keep speaking that into existence the shit just might happen. Is that what you want?" Robyn avoided his gaze, she didn't want to look at him. She cried but she only when he was asleep. There were no problems being affectionate and intimate with him, but allowing him to see completely vulnerable wasn't easy. Chris walked over to the bed and laid on top of her so she couldn't keep avoiding his eyes. "Listen to me. I will allow you to do many things but quitting and speaking negatively isn't one of them. Leaving isn't one of them. That's easy to do, and I won't let you take the easy way out. I get it you're hurt, and that's fine. Take as much time as you need but do you really think Gran Gran would let you talk like this?"
"No."
"Robyn, you're not alone. You don't have to do this alone. I'll be there with you, I've been there with you, and I always will, but I can only do so much. I can't heal for you. I can't heal you either. As far as our future kids are concerned, I'll let you in on a little secret. A special message from Gran Gran that she told me to only tell you when the time was appropriate," Robyn cuddled up to him and waited to hear what he was told.
"Remember that day when you woke up, and I wasn't there?" She nodded. "I went to visit Gran Gran and meet her for the first time. Something told me to go over there and see her. We talked about everything, and she told me about all the visions she had. In one of them, she saw these two little kids, a boy, and a girl. She said they looked familiar––– the little girl especially because she looked like you. She didn't recognize the little boy, but when she met me, she knew it was I that reminded her of that little boy. She saw you with them, and you were so happy, and they were healthy and happy. Baby Girl, despite what you think everything will be fine. She promised me that everything would be fine. You don't need to worry about our life or our kids. We'll live and be forever young."
"Wow." He looked down and saw a genuine smile laced across her face. He kissed her and continued. "As long as you keep this up, you'll always feel like this and have that mindset. You can't heal what you never reveal, Buttercup."
"You're right."
"You're stronger than this, Robyn. You'll get through this. We'll get through this."
She looked up at him. "I'm sorry about everything I said to you. I guess I lashed out thinking it would help with the pain. You forgive me?"
"I'll always forgive you, I know you didn't mean it. I appreciate the apology though."
"How can you deal with me? I haven't exactly been the best lately."
"For better or for worse, right?"
Chris immediately thought of an idea, and it seemed Robyn caught on with the smile that was on her face. They sat up and turned their bodies, facing each other. "Robyn, you've been the best part of my life. I would marry you with a boat and a goat since you probably ate those back on the island," he paused to keep himself from laughing at her shocked expression. "Why do I like you?" He laughed before continuing. "You're the peanut to my butter, and I would love to taste your jelly, getting us into a jam. You're the star to my burst, and you cause me to burst in my pants. You're the Milky to my Way, and I can't wait to feel the way you get milky as you milk me. You're the ice to my cream that will be covered all over me for eternity. You're the best to my friend. I like you Forehead."
Robyn couldn't keep the smile off her face as she shook her head. "It's time for the vows of the bride," Chris said in a deep voice
"A E I O U"
"Are you serious?"
"Sometimes, why?"
Robyn laughed as Chris looked at her with a squint and a pout. "You will give me proper vows woman." "Okay, okay," Robyn cleared her throat before taking Chris' hands in hers. "Chris, that ass belongs to me. I've enjoyed annoying you all this time, and I'm excited to keep doing so in the future. Like when you get old and wrinkly I'll pinch your butt because it'll be saggy, and to see you blush in embarrassment. You know you'll like it. I'm looking forward to waking up to your crusty face for the rest of our lives. I got a sweet tooth for you baby, and I don't mind getting cavities for you."
They stared at each other before busting out into fits of laughter. Chris hoped that it would lighten the mood and bring the radiance back on her face and it seemed to do the trick. As much as he didn't mind being there for her at her worst, if he could help it, he would always ensure that he brought the best out of her.
"Reeses, can you go somewhere with me?"
"Anywhere."
-
They were back at the cemetery, before going there Robyn asked Chris to stop by a floral shop to get some flowers to put on Dolly's grave. Losing the closest one to her made her in denial––– she ran away not wanting to believe it, broke down because she didn't want to see it, but now she was there to move past it. It's what Dolly would have wanted, and it's what she wanted too so she could start living again. She chose to wallow in despair, she chose to deprive herself of anything that was remotely close to living. Now her choice was to be happy.
"Hi, Gran," she said softly staring at the tombstone. "It's taken me a while to do this, to be able to face reality but better late than never, right? I remembered seeing all the memories we shared together when I looked at your casket, and that's when it hit me. That's when I realized you were really gone. Thankfully, though, I have this biscuit colored boyfriend that helped me realize that you aren't gone, that you're here but in spirit. I feel you right now, actually. You know I'll miss you, but I guess it's time for me to grow up, let you go, and live. I'm going to be happy Gran Gran. I'm going to have my happy ending. I'm going to live, laugh, and smile. I know you're watching me from Heaven so kiss Mummy for me and tell her I love and miss her too. One day, we'll all be joined together again, but until that day, I'll be here basking in love."
Robyn placed the flowers on the grave and turned to smile at Chris. She went over, and he hugged her tightly.
"I'm so proud of you."
"That felt good. It feels like the weight of the world has been lifted off my shoulders."
"I'm glad, Buttercup."
"Now it's time to start living together forever." She looked up at him, and Chris felt bundles of guilt placed on his shoulders. Forever. That was a word that couldn't and didn't apply to them. Had she known it would've been harder for him to help her recover from this hurt. He couldn't pile on the news of their fate when she was having a difficult time dealing with losing Dolly. He knew it was only a matter of time before he would have to tell her and when he did he hoped it wouldn't spur the same behavior she exhibited for the two weeks after Dolly's death.