Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
― Robert A. Heinlein
I Can't Live Without You
"Draco?" I murmured for the fifth time to my boyfriend who sat quietly in the corner of the couch, face buried so deep into a book i was afraid he may not be able to breathe properly.
Draco didn't respond to his name, instead he flipped the page he had read and continued to stare at the words on the paper. I smiled at how oblivious he was to what was going on around him when he was reading. He was like Hermonie, a total bookworm, addicted to books and words and stuff Ron and I don't really care about.
Draco shifted, tucking his legs into his chest and sinking further into the corner of the couch we were sitting on. He looked absolutely adorable, curled up there with the firelight reflecting off his skin.
His hair looked golden, he had been getting out in the sun more so his hair was no longer ghostly white. This also goes for his skin, it's healthier looking now that he's eating more than once a week.
I will take credit for that.
A door slams shut, loudly, and Draco drops his book, whipping out his wand to point it at the direction of the sound that frightened him. I smile sadly. I know what he's thinking, what he's expecting. "No baby, it was just a door." I say.
After a few seconds of staring at the door and waiting for something bad to happen Draco finally looks at me, his eyes wide like saucers. "A-a door?" He asks.
"Yes, just a door." I say and reach a hand over to remove his wand. Draco lets me take it, then he slowly leans back into me and i wrap my arms around him, trying to stop his shaking.
You see, you have to be careful around my Draco. He is delicate. The quietest noise can set him off and the slightest movement can make him flinch. But i guess spending 15 months in the deepest and darkest cell of Azkaban, with insane people as neighbors and then being tortured everyday for something you were forced to do, would make a person act like this.
I remember when i went to fetch him.
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The guard led me down to his cell. People on either side of me were screaming and spitting, their faces were smeared with dirt and blood. They would reach out there hands to me, begging me to release them from the hell. Some even asked for me to kill them.
Every person there, i noticed, was much older then my Draco, in their thirties at least, and i realize that this seriously is no place for a child. And a seventeen year old boy is still a child. Not an adult.
As we near Draco's cage the lighting in the room decreases, until i'm almost walking in pitch blackness other than the lantern of the guard. We stop outside Draco's cell. The guard opens the cage and we step in.
Immediately i noticed how cold the temperature is and the strong smell of blood. I could almost taste the metallic stuff on my tongue. The cell looked bare, like there was noting in it, until the guard shouted a string of curse words. And then i saw him, a small, pale foot, connected to a small dark lump with two haunted grey eyes peering out.
I sucked in a deep breath at the sight of my love. I hadn't seen him in 15 months, and he looked terrible. He was thin, making me doubt he was fed at all during his time here. His hair had grown long and he was covered in dirt and blood like most of the inhabitants here.
He was trembling violently, and curled himself tighter into a ball. He reminded me of an abused puppy. "Oh baby." I said and knelt down next to him. As i got closer i notice the bruises on his face, and i hated to think of what was underneath his clothes.
"Draco." I cooed, reaching out a hand to him but he flinched away, trembling harder. I pulled away, frowning. "Draco, darling. It's me. It's Harry. It's Harry. Come on sweetie."
"H-Harry." Draco whimpered. Looking back at me. I nodded, blinking away the tears that had gathered in the corners of my eyes.
"Yes baby it's me." I said. Draco released a sob and then flung himself into my arms. The emotions passing through me were overwhelming. Relief, possessiveness, contentment, protectiveness, anger, guilt, happiness, and many more.
I was finally reunited with the one i love. I was finally cradling Draco in my arms where it was safe, where i could protect him. Draco wrapped his short, skinny legs around my waist and his arms wrapped themselves around my neck, squeezing as hard as he could. I felt the warmth of his tears run down my neck where he had buried his face. I never wanted to let him go. I wanted to hold him forever. I couldn't live without him.
"It's okay now baby. You're safe. I've got you. Let's go home." I said and stood up with him in my arms. As we left people were yelling and screaming, shouting and crying. They cursed at us. Saying that my baby didn't deserve to leave, that he was a monster. That the dark mark on his arm was proof of his true evil self.
I hugged Draco closer to me.
Ron and Harmoine were waiting for us at the vehicle to take us home. Upon seeing Draco sobbing into me Harmoine burst into tears. She and Draco had become quite close over the years. And even Ron, who had taken some time to get used to the idea, had blurry eyes.
As soon as we arrived to our secluded home in the mountains i gave him a bath, a haircut, tried to feed him, then went to bed. He fell asleep in my arms straight away due to exhaustion, but he was asleep none the same. And all i could do was watch as he slept.
I had discovered that his body was littered with scars, old ones and new ones. Harmoine did her best to heal up the more recent ones and most of the bruises, so now all that was left were feint white lines.
I remember thinking How could someone do this to him? Draco wasn't bad. He was completely innocent, if not a hero! He was the one who spied on Voldemort for us, he risked his life for us. And this is his payment.
Draco slept for three whole days. And i held him for those days, and the ones after.
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And i still hold him now.
It took a few days for him to stop trembling.
It took a few weeks to get him to talk again.
A few months to get him to eat properly again.
And i don't know if the nightmares will ever stop.
Not that i mind comforting him, i just wish he didn't have to go through that.
Draco rests his head in the crook of my arm and chest and continues reading his book. His shaking has stopped, but i still hug him as close as possible to me. The thought of losing him again is what gives me nightmares, and if i'm not touching him or if i can't see him then i'd be assuming the worst has happened to him.
"Baby." I whisper.
"Hm?" He murmurs.
"Whats your book about?" I shift him so he's sitting on my lap and absently run my fingers through his hair.
"It's about a girl, who pretends to be dead."
"That sounds horrible. Why are you reading that?"
Draco smiled at me, and as always whenever he smiles, my heart skips several beats to recollect itself.
"Just wait. And then the boy, who loves her, finds her and sees that she's dead. So he kills himself."
"It still sounds horrible."
"It gets better. And then, the girl who was pretending to be dead, wakes up. And when she sees the boy dead she is so sad that she kills herself too because she can't live without him. They can't live without each other. So they kill themselves so they could be in heaven together. It's so romantic."
"But they both end up dead!"
"There's worse things than death." Draco whispers then turns round so he's straddling me and leans his hands on my chest. I wrap my arms around him. "Would you do that for me?"
"What? Die for you? Of course i would." I say, kissing him on the neck. He sighs lightly but shakes his head.
"No, i mean. If i died would you kill yourself?" He asked. Thats my Draco, straightforward, no sugarcoating. "Because...if you died. I-i don't think that i could live w-without you H-Harry. In Azkaban i-"
"Shh, don't think about that place. It's okay, i'm not gonna die. Not without you. Because if i did then i would be in Heaven alone. And well, it wouldn't really be Heaven at all because you wouldn't be there in my arms now would it." I nuzzled my nose against his. He smiled.
"I love you." He whispers as i kiss behind his ear.
"Do you." I say between kisses.
"Hn...yeah." He gasps.
"Good. Cause i love you."
"Do you?" He asks.
I kiss his lips and hold him tighter against me, my possessive instincts wanting him closer.
"More that you will ever know. Because my Draco..."
"Hm?"
"You are mine, forever."
"I am yours forever."
"And i can't live without you."
"And i can't live without you."
"Will you marry me."
"Yes."
By SuicidalRenaissance