alec:
i can do nothing. not that i want to do anything anyway.
feelings? what are they anyway. i've been clouded for the past few days. ever since i received the news that my amazing little brother had been killed, it's like the whole world's been on standby. like it's stopped.
not even magnus is helping. not even my therapist diana is helping.
nothing is.
i don't know what to fucking do. i want to die. i want everything to end. if there was a way i could go that would cause magnus and jace and isabelle and the others to not be upset then i'd do it.
i should do it.
i'm a worthless piece of shit.
my baby brother died and i wasn't there to do anything.
is there any way to make this stop? make everything stop? i want to erase my entire existence. it's too painful.
hang on. it's only a couple months till my eighteenth, magnus is twenty in three days, and our one year anniversary is also coming up.
that's it.
i've decided.
28th july.
<<-the next few chapters are gonna be quite short because i have the rest of the story planned out, which unfortunately means that it's only around three or so chapters till the end :( but don't worry! there'll be a super cute epilogue, and possibly, if i can think of one, a sequel to this ;) either way when this ends there will be either a new one shot book or a sequel. comment what u would prefer if u want! ->>