Yeah... I'm not even gonna try to make any excuses for this one. I have a lot to say and explain some things at the end of the chapter, but first, I'd like to dedicate this special chapter to AnimeMadWoman. She's so awesome so go check out some of her stuff. Now please enjoy the chapter!
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It hurts to open my eyes. I lie in silence on something large and soft. Could it be a bed? If it is, then whose bed is it? It doesn't matter. I can feel something cold on my chest and voices are loud in my ears. My head is pounding as I struggle to finally open my eyes, and when I do, I immediately regret it. Three doctors, all dressed in white coats stand over me. Their surgical masks cover their faces. They look so similar to the doctors back at the asylum.
I'm back at the asylum, I think. My brothers took me back and abandoned me once again. Without thinking, I jump up, shocking the doctors surrounding me. "Adeline, please lie back down," a man says. He grabs my arm and I quickly bite his hand as hard as I can. He yells out in pain and the other doctors try to come to his aid. They pull on my arms and yank me back. A chunk of the man's skin comes with me though, still resting in my teeth. The man howls in pain, dropping to the floor and still holding his bleeding hand. I taste the copper blood in my mouth and spit out the man's skin. It falls the floor and a nurse screams.
As the doctors hold me, I kick and scream, wanting to be let go. I don't want to be back here! I want to go home!
Something sharp is plunged into my neck and I whimper loudly. Black dots cloud my vision and once again, I'm out like a light.
When I wake up again, my arms are strapped down to my sides. I yank them but it's no use. I hear footsteps approaching me, and I look up to see Alex. He bends down next to the bed that I lie in and strokes my hair gently.
"Oh my God Addy," he gasps. "Are you okay? How do you feel?" I shrug my shoulders and look at him sadly. I don't want to be here.
Alex looks as if he's on the verge of tears and continues stroking my hair. "Addy, do you know what happened?" I shake my head. "You almost drowned in the tub. I tried to call you to dinner but you didn't answer. When I went to your room, you weren't there so I went to the bathroom. When I opened the door you were completely under the water. You weren't breathing, God Addy I was so worried."
Something about his story doesn't sound right to me. My head pounds as I try to think of the last thing I remember, but nothing comes to mind. He grabs my hand and I don't find the strength to pull away from him. He smiles at me almost pitifully. "Don't worry Addy, as soon as you're better Jason's gonna come and we're taking you back home. He'll make everything alright."
Better.
For some reason, that word haunts me. It feels like a burden that I can't lift because I know that I will never be better. They tried to make me better at the asylum and that didn't help. My brothers tried to help me get better and look how that ended up. No amount of treatment can fix what's wrong with me.
I just lay on the bed, numbly. I look out the window when a small blue bird flies on the windowsill. I stare at it and it stares back at me. I feel like we understand each other. Maybe it's just as lonely as me. I don't talk to or even acknowledge anyone when they come into my room. Even when the doctor comes in and tries to talk to me, I never once lift my head or pay him any mind. I just stare at the window watching as the blue bird takes flight.
I've been in the hospital for almost a week now, and I'm now allowed to have my restraints off. I take small walks around the hallways. The doctor says that I should walk around for at least an hour to get in some exercise. At first they wanted a nurse to walk around with me to make sure that I won't hurt myself. After the first 2 days, they finally let me walk around by myself after I promised to be back as soon as my hour was up.
I'm laying in bed, drowsy from my afternoon nap. Despite the walks that I take, there's not much for me to do here so I get tired easily. My ears pick up on the sound of people talking outside of the closed door my room. The voices are hushed so I can barely even tell what they are saying. The words are too quiet for me to even recognize whose voices it may be. I lie for about 5 minutes when the door opens and my doctor walks in. She is a tall and slim woman with her dirty blonde hair pulled up into a bun. She takes out a syringe from her pocket, looking slightly uneasy. I stare up at the doctor in confusion. In the days that I've spent here my doctor has been nothing short of cheerful. She often gives me small compliments about small things such as my hair or how well behaved I am for the day. Her behavior is strange but I try my best to ignore it.
I watch as she walks towards me slowly. "May I Adeline?"
I nod. I know that if I say no and make a fuss, that will just make things worse and I'll be restrained again. Even though I have no idea what she's giving me, I'd rather take that than not be able to move again. She quickly gives me the small needle filled with clear liquid, and I am now allowed to leave the room. The woman turns her back to me and I hear her whisper it. It is so quiet that if I hadn't been listening then I could've easily not have heard it.
"I'm so sorry," the woman whispers as she leaves the room.
She leaves me sitting in the hospital in complete confusion. What could she have to be sorry for? I try to push her words to the back of my mind but they continue to haunt me. After walking around the hospital for a few minutes, still thinking about the doctor's words, I decide to go back to my room. I'm walking down a small hallway when I notice a familiar young girl sitting in one of the chairs. Jamie sits with her hands folded in her lap, staring at the floor blankly. She is still wearing the pink dress but it is slightly dirtier than the last time I saw it. I walk closer to her tap on her shoulder. She jumps, but then relaxes when she realizes that it's me. "Oh, hi Adeline. What are you doing here?"
I realize that I don't have my notebook with me and silently scold myself for being so careless. I put my hands around my throat and making a choking motion.
"You choked?" She asks worriedly. I nod. "Oh," she says sadly. "I hope you feel better."
I notice the way that Jamie's eyes hold a sense of sadness in them. She is not the happy-go-lucky girl that I first met. Now she's just a sad little child. Just like me.
I take her hand and guide her back to my room. At first she struggles again my grasp but eventually allows me to guide her. When we get back to my room I sit on the bed and pat the spot next to me. She sits down and smiles at me. I take my notebook and ask the question that's been bugging me for awhile.
"Why are you here?" She holds a look of concentration for awhile before finally answering. "I was visiting a relative."
I know she's lying but I decide not to question her any further. She looks upset about something and I put my hand atop hers. The sound of footsteps nearing startle us both and we jump. Jamie stands up suddenly and looks at me. "I should get going now, my family will get worried." She runs to the door and turns to look at me one more time. "See you later, Adeline."
She leaves out the door just as Jason walks in. They don't look at each other or pay the other any attention. Jason walks towards my bed and sits on the end of it. "I see you're feeling better. The doctor said that we can leave later on this afternoon. They just need to take a few tests." I nod and we sit in silence in the room.
"Adeline?" I look at Jason, waiting for him to say what he wants. "Why won't you talk Addy? We know you can." I shrug and he sighs. He takes me hand in his and holds it tightly.
"Please Adeline. Just say something, one sentence, one word, just something." I try to yank my hand away from his but he's holding it tightly. I grit my teeth and pull harder. I don't want him touching me. He doesn't let go and only holds it tighter. "If not for me then do it for Alex," he whispers.
I'm not paying attention to his pleas though, still trying to get him to let go of my hand. I smack at his arm and when he doesn't let go, I look around. My eyes rest on a scalpel that sits on the metal table next to my bed. I grip it tightly in my hand and raise it above my head. Jason gives me one last pleading look before I bring it down and stab his left eye. He cries out and I stab him again deeper. Blood spurts out of his eye as I stab him again and again. His screams fill the room. They are loud and agonizing, yet no one seems to notice and come in from hearing the noise. After a few more stabs, he stops screaming and finally falls to the floor. I give a small smile as I look at his dead body.
"Adeline?"
Jason rests his hand on top of my own and squeezes gently. I blink, snapping out of whatever it was that I just had. When I look up at him, he gives me a small smile. "You ready to go? The doctor said we can leave."
I stare at Jason for awhile. Wasn't he just dead? I look down at my hands and they are completely clean. No traces of blood left on them. The scalpel that I once held is back in its original position on the table. A hand rests on my shoulder and I jump, causing Jason to look at me in concern. "Addy, whats wrong?"
I shake my head, slowly standing up off of the bed. He reaches out to help me up but I don't let him touch me. He gives me a look of sadness but it's gone in a second, and he stands up, grabbing me clothes off of a nearby chair. When he leaves the room I quickly get dressed and open the door to let him know that I'm ready. We walk out of the hospital room and towards the front desk when Alex stands. He is leaning against a wall with his hands in his pockets. He seems conflicted as he stares down at the white tile of the floor. When he finally notices us he practically sprints towards us. I don't even have time to think about being angry when he lifts me up in his arms, his face resting in the crook of my neck. "I'm so glad you're safe," he whispers.
His voice cracks and I know from experience that he is going to cry soon. Without thinking, I raise my arm and slowly hug him back. It feels strange to have my arms around him so...comfortingly. I don't even know why I did it.
Alex seems just as surprised as I am, and he looks at me in shock. A small smile lights up his face and he hugs me again even tighter. Something warms my chest and I can't explain the weird brink of happiness that I feel at seeing his smile. I shake my head and push him away from me. I should hate him.
Before Alex can say anything, a doctor walks towards us and begins talking to my brothers. He explains to them how much rest I should get and that it would be safer to put a bar on the wall next to the bathtub so that I don't fall under the water again. After the twins sign a few pieces of paper we leave the hospital. The drive is silent as we make our way home.
When we arrive at the house, Jace sits on the front porch, his knees bouncing. He stands up as we pull in front of the house and I get out, being quickly enveloped in a hug. What's with people and wanting to hug me? I let Jace hold me in his arms for a few seconds before I pull away from him. "How are you Adeline?"
I think for a few seconds before slowly signing to him. "I'm fine." When he sees my signing a big proud smile appears on his pale face. He looks like a parent that just saw their kid take a step for the first time. He hugs me again and I roll my eyes. "Great job Adeline, I'm so proud of you."
A small smile appears on my face for just a second. I force my face to go back to its emotionless stare before anyone can see me. I look up at the twins to see Alex wearing a look of what seems to be a mix of jealousy and sadness. When he notices me looking at him, he smiles kindly.
"Thank you for teaching ASL to her Jace, but you know you didn't have to do that." Jace smiles, waving him off.
"It's no problem really. Adeline's a really good kid, I'm happy to teach her." My chest warms up slightly and I try my hardest not to smile to myself. Jason puts his hand on Alex's shoulder and he immediately relaxes. "Well we better go on inside. We'll see you tomorrow?"
Jace nods. "I'll be here bright and early." He walks down the street and away from house. As Jace leaves part of me wants to ask him if he can stay. To not leave me here with the strangers that I've come to know as brothers. But soon he's gone from my sight, and Jason ushers me inside. Once the door closes behind us Alex bends down on one knee to speak to me.
"Why don't you go on upstairs and get ready for lunch Addy?" I shrug and make my way upstairs. Before I'm completely up the steps though, I can hear Jason and Alex talking. Leaning down slightly, I listen to their hushed words.
"You shouldn't have done that," Jason whispers harshly to his twin.
"I know I know. But what else was I supposed to do? If she found out the truth then who knows what could've happened."
"That gives us no right to drug her! And not to even mention that she almost drowned!" Jason's loud voice shakes the house. There are a few moments of silence and when he speaks again his voice is much more calm. "As I was saying, she's gonna have to learn the truth some day."
"No!" The sounds of things falling and glass breaking in the kitchen makes me jump. There are loud grunts coming from both the boys before one of them speaks again. "She can't find out! Ever," Alex's panicked voice whispers harshly to Jason. "If she ever read what was in that box, could you imagine what could happen to me! To us!"
At the mention of the box something in my head clicks. I quietly, but quickly make my way towards the boys' room and grab the box from under the bed. The key still rests inside of it and I fumble for a few seconds trying to get it to open. When it finally opens, I take out every single piece of paper that rests inside of it and begin to read. I read the handwritten part of the note as my memory rushes back to me. I remember falling onto the floor the first time I read this. I remember a man taking me away to my room. I remember drowning in the bathtub and the two figures fighting each other. Everything comes back to me in a flash. My vision blurs with anger as I stomp out of the room and down the stairs. Jason and Alex look at my angry form in surprise. I throw the papers at them and their faces pale.
"Addy you...you read it," Jason asks with fear evident in his voice.
"I read it days ago," I sign. It is slow and probably has a few errors, but at the moment I couldn't care less. "You just made me take the medicine so I didn't remember what it was that I read."
"Adeline," Alex sighs, slowly walking towards me. I glare at him, making him shut his mouth. He makes no attempt to come closer to me. "I didn't kill mom and dad, did I?" Their silence only makes me angrier, so I take a nearby glass of water on the table and slam it onto the ground, making it shatter loudly. They both look at me as I continue to sign.
"Answer me!"
"No you didn't kill them," Jason finally answers. I glance over at Alex to see him shaking slightly. I pay no mind to it. "Who did it?"
They both stare at the ground, unable to look me in the eye. I wait patiently for their answer but neither of them say anything. Alex finally looks up at me and there are tears in his eyes threatening to fall. Jason walks up next to his brother, putting a hand on his shoulder. He squeezes gently as Alex begins to shake, the tears finally falling. Once again I am left out of their family moment, forced to watch from the sidelines. Part of me wants to feel some type of sadness but the other part of me is too angry to care. I can feel the fire building in my chest and I know that if they don't say something soon then it'll burst forth.
"It was me," one of them whispers so softly that I can't even make out who it was. Alex sinks to his knees, sobbing into his hands. "I killed them," he cries out. As Jason tries to comfort his twin I only stare down at him. I stare at them in disbelief. I want to believe that they're lying. That this is some type of sick joke. But Alex's cries are too real, too genuine to even be close to a joke. Any sadness that I once felt is replaced with a searing hatred. For three years I had to suffer in the asylum at the hands of the doctors and patients. For three years I was blamed for the murder of my parents. Everyone thought that I was crazy. They thought that I was a murderer. I lost my entire childhood all because of him.
All because of him.
Without thinking, I run towards Alex and tackle him to the ground. Jason yells my name but I pay him no mind. I punch and slap him. My hits echo throughout the entire room, accompanied by my screaming. I wrap my hands around Alex's throat, squeezing as tightly as I can. He doesn't try to fight back as I choke him. He only stares up at me with tears in his eyes. Jason grabs my waist and rips me off of Alex. Once my hands are off his throat, Alex coughs, regaining his breath. When he catches his breath he looks up at me sadly.
"I'm sorry," he whimpers. "I'm so sorry." His baby blue eyes beg me for forgiveness. Snot and tears mix on his face as he continues to cry out to me. But I couldn't care less about his apologies. My heart is pumping loudly in my ears. The little bit of sympathy and love that I held for him is now gone, and is replaced with a pure hatred. I want him to feel every once of pain that I had to suffer through. My hands are balled up so tightly that I can feel the skin begin to fear and bleed. But it doesn't hurt. Not even a little. I clear my throat and my voice is raspy from the three years that it's been kept silent. I try to pay the almost burning sensation in my throat no mind. Once my throat begins to feel just a little bit more bearable, I whisper the first thing that comes to mind.
"Fuck you."
Hi everyone! No I'm not dead, despite what it may seem. I've been pretty much MIA on here and I really want to apologize to anyone who has been waiting to see an update on this book. I'd once again like to say that this chapter is dedicated to AnimeMadWoman. Shes been really patient with me on this, so please please please go check her stuff out. With the New Year I wanna try and be more active and progressive, especially when it comes to my stories. I'm so sorry to everyone and I hope you all can forgive me. Love you guys!