(A/N: I don't hate pigeons, I was using Piper being scared of the rats in S6 when I came up with this)
(Piper's POV)
We left the bathroom maybe about 25 minutes later. I wanted to prove a point to the waitress flirting with me that I only had eyes for Alex so pulled my wife into the stall while the waitress looked on. Alex and I kissed passionately until the waitress left and when we heard her sigh and slam the door, Alex immediately grabbed me and sat me on the toilet after putting its lid down.
"Al? What're you doing?!" I asked, well more exclaimed excitedly, knowing exactly what she was doing. My question was aimed at the fact that this was a public restroom and people might come in and both hear and catch us. She crouched and smirked up at me, quirking an eyebrow.
"After that, you, Mrs Vause, are getting lucky." She smuttily says then immediately began to go down on me like there was no tomorrow. I guess I was lucky.
25 minutes later, we emerged from the bathroom. The waitress was scowling at us from the other side of the restaurant as Alex found the manager to pay. She never let go of my hand the whole time, keeping the waitress in her sights.
She speaks in fluent French to the manager and I could tell she was using her business head to ask for a deduction on the bill due to the inappropriate behaviour of the waitress. Alex speaking another language had me like putty. It was so fucking hot.
"Excusez-moi monsieur, je devrais m'attendre à ce que la facture de ma femme et de moi-même soit déduite d'au moins 10%, ce que votre serveuse flirte avec ma bien-aimée. J'espère que tu comprends." She said.
I worked out that I was right in what I'd guessed she'd said as the manager's eyes widened in embarrassment. She'd said,
"Excuse me sir, I should expect the bill for my wife and myself to be deducted at least 10%, when your waitress is flirting with my beloved. I hope you understand."
The manager apologised profusely,
"Oh madame, je suis vraiment désolée! Ma fille sera disciplinée immédiatement. Bien sûr, vous pouvez vous attendre à une réduction du prix! S'il vous plaît accepter mes nombreuses excuses!" He rambled.
I whispered to Alex,
"What did he say?"
She replied, whispering back to me.
"He said and I quote, 'Oh madam, I am so sorry! My daughter will be disciplined immediately. Of course you can expect a reduction on the price! Please accept my many apologies!'"
My eyes widened,
"His daughter?!" I hissed.
She chuckled,
"Yep, congrats Pipes, you've got girls in their mid twenties after you now. See? I told you, you're a hot one. But you're all mine. Remember what I said, don't ever fuck the housekeeper." She laughed, jokingly scolding me as she pointed at me.
We left the restaurant laughing, leaving the manager shouting at the waitress who was apparently his daughter. But as soon as we stepped outside, the rain came on and we had no coats or umbrellas. Luckily, I was wearing a scarf which I quickly took off and shook out. It was one of those scarves that were thin rectangular shaped material that rolled to become a scarf. I gave one side to Alex as we used it as a shelter from the rain, putting it over our heads and running to the park beside the Eiffel Tower. We continued to laugh as we ran and when we got underneath a tree, it wasn't much help so Alex took the scarf, wrapped it around my neck again then said,
"Fuck it."
She cupped my face and brought me in for a deep, loving kiss in the shadow of the Eiffel Tower. Neither of us cared that we were getting wet, it was too romantic to care.
Unfortunately though, we had a long walk back to Alex's motorcycle at Place de la Concorde so I guess we had to walk in the rain. We didn't see the point in getting a cab or the underground since we had our own transport, even if it was a 15 minute walk away, well in the rain, a 15 minute run away.
Halfway through our walk back, the rain stopped and the sun came back out so Alex and I used this opportunity to naturally dry off. We were strolling down the sidewalk beside the river Seine until we finally got back to Place de la Concorde where Alex had her motorcycle parked right outside the 5 star hotel beside the American embassy. But holy hell no, the whole square was covered in pigeons. I hated pigeons. They were flying vermin.
I immediately leapt on Alex. Clinging to her front like a koala bear, wrapping my arms around her neck and legs around her waist. Letting out a slight squeal.
Alex catches me and laughs.
"Woah fuck! I forgot you hated pigeons Pipes."
I buried my face in her shoulder, my words coming out a muffled murmur.
"They are flying vermin. That is all they are." I said into her shoulder.
At this, Alex reaches down to pet one, forcing me down with her as I clung to her. She was teasing me.
"Oh come on they're not vermin! They're cute!" She laughs.
I turned my head slightly to look at what she was doing with the pigeons and saw a pigeon coo and lean into her touch. Yep, I had to say, I was with it so far.
"Aw would you look at that!" Alex laughs still with me clinging to her.
I turned even more to cautiously look at the interaction between the pigeon and Alex.
"Huh, maybe they are kinda- AAAH."
I was cut off as a scooter whizzed by and startled every single pigeon, making them take off in fright directly for us in a flurry of feathers and beating wings.
I couldn't help but scream and go back to clinging onto Alex even tighter which made her laugh even harder.
"Fine, let's get you back to the apartment you big baby." She laughs.
"I'm your big baby." I correct her.
"Got that right babe. MY big baby." She smirks.