Peter didn't eat much which just worried Tony and Steve even more, he left without saying anything and went to his room. He lay in bed again, staring at the dark ceiling with tears in his eyes rolling down his cheeks into the pillow.
He didn't want to sleep knowing that he'd have the same nightmare he had last time he slept, the same one he has nearly every night.
He ended up back on the roof staring up at the sky with his legs dangling over the edge. His spidey senses didn't go off telling him that someone was there until he saw him walk past.
"You alright kid?" Tony asked sitting next to him as Peter sat up.
"Yeah, I'm feeling great," Peter said sounding more sarcastically than it was meant to.
"Alright I get it. What's up?" Tony asked smiling slightly.
Peter didn't answer so Tony started talking again.
"Is it the nightmares?" Tony watched his face to see if it changed but it didn't. "I asked Friday how often you had them and she said almost every night you've been here."
"It doesn't matter," Peter said still looking at the sky.
"I know you come up here quite a lot, mostly at night."
"I'll go back if you wa..."
"No it's fine I don't mind. I just wanna know why? Because when you come up here you don't sleep that night."
"It doesn't matter."
"It's you're nightmares isn't it? Do you want to talk about them?"
"Not really." Peter was starting to get annoyed.
"That another thing you'll tell us when you're ready?"
"Or not at all," Peter sighed. "Why did you choose to foster me anyway? You've seen my file?"
"We saw you as you, not you're file like most people probably do. Because we believe that you're different than the boy in that file."
"Yeah sure. But you're probably just gonna end up like everyone else!" Peter snapped.
"And how's that?" Tony said calmly.
"Hurt me and then send me back making up some bullshit lie! Like everyone else has!"
"We're not going to do that. I promise you we won't send you away and we definitely won't hurt you," Tony said staying calm.
"Yeah, I've heard that before," Peter said standing up.
"What do I need to say to make you believe me?" Tony asked also standing up.
"Nothing because I won't believe it. I've been lied to and hurt too many times!" Peter said before realising everything he'd just said. "I'm sorry."
"It's alright kid," Tony said smiling at him. "You're okay, you're safe here."
"I'm sorry," Peter kept repeating over and over again.
"Calm down Peter," Tony said bring Peter away from the edge.
"Just leave me alone!" Peter shouted pulling away from Tony, still hyperventilating slightly.
"Peter I..."
"I don't care! Leave me alone!" Peter shouted with tears in his eyes, he didn't actually want him to leave.
"Alright. I'll be in the lab if you need me," Tony said before leaving not knowing what to do.
As soon as Tony closed the door Peter completely broke down crying he sat on the ground hugging his legs into his chest.
He felt the walls he had built up over the years that had began to fall when he got fostered by them start to build back up again. He didn't know why, he knew there was no stopping it.
He didn't stop crying for about 15 minutes, after that he just sat there staring at nothing feeling completely numb. He looked out into the city and felt so alone, so out of place like he used to. That was a feeling he never thought would feel strange to feel but it did, he used to feel it all the time and it was coming back.
•
He climbed down back through his window, he never got any sleep but he didn't care, he was used to it. He'd have to put his usual fake smile on so nobody suspected anything. He still had his clothes on from yesterday, he just got his bag and walked down the stairs to see Steve in the kitchen, he was bringing Peter to school.
In the car he tried to talk to Peter but he soon realised he wasn't in the mood to talk so he gave up trying. Peter wanted to talk, he wanted to answer the questions he was being asked but there was something stopping him.
"Tony's gonna be picking you up after school, will that be alright?" Steve asked when he stopped the car outside the school.
"Yeah, whatever. See you later pops," Peter said getting out the car meeting Ned who was waiting for him.
"Dude, that's so awesome that Captain America drives you to school."
"Yeah, well it's probably the last time," Peter said as they walked up to his locker.
"What do you mean? Did they do something?"
"No Ned, I did. I fucked up, like I always do. The one time I have something good I have to fuck it up don't I?" Peter said changing the books in his bag to his chemistry.
"Look I'm sure you didn't fuck up, you don't fuck up everything you know?"
"Yeah I do, Ned. You just don't see it." Peter slammed his locker closed by accident causing people to stare. "Shit."
"Well you still got me and Wade and Mj, we're good things in your life aren't we?"
"Yeah you all are, but it's only a matter of time," Peter said before walking away from Ned.
•
Peter hadn't shown up for any of his classes, when he left Ned he had left school. He went back for chemistry though which was his second last class of the day, where he sat at the back of the room next to Ned. Peter hoped he wouldn't say anything to him and he didn't.
Ned didn't know what to say to him, he'd never seen him like that. To him, Peter was always happy and hopeful no matter what shit he was going through, no matter how bad his life was he never seemed hopeless.
Ned always knew since he met him that there was something he wasn't telling him and maybe it was that who he saw wasn't who he was at all.
•
As Peter was getting his math book from his locker the principal walked up to him telling him to go with him, which he did. He knew what was happening. Well he thought he did.
"Look I'm sorry I..." he stopped as he walked in the room to see Tony sitting there.
"Peter, please sit down." Peter done what he asked and he continued, "so I've called Mr Stark in because you weren't in any classes today except your last class and you know the rules Peter but seen as you've already been put on detention for next two weeks I'm going to have to suspend you..."
That was when Peter stopped listening, he knew his social worker would be involved and that's even if they decide to keep fostering him, which he didn't think they would. He was brought back to reality after about ten minutes by Tony standing up and putting his hand on Peter's shoulder. Peter stood up suddenly to get his hand off him and walked out the door.
"So why? You could have just called one of us to pick you up instead of just skipping," Tony said when they got in the car.
Peter didn't answer he just kept looking out the window. He hated feeling what he was feeling.
"Peter. Talk to me?" Tony asked softly.
"When we get back do I need to pack my shit? And who's gonna be taking me you or Steve?"
"What? You're not going anywhere kid," Tony said worried.
"I just thought after last night and now thi..."
"What? That we'd give up on you? That's not gonna happen," Tony interrupted.
"Where are we going?" Peter asked noticing Tony was going the wrong way home.
"We've noticed that you keep wearing the same hoodies and the same jeans everyday so we're going to a store to get you some clothes."
"You really don't ha..."
"Peter. You need clothes."
•
They got to a clothes store, one that Peter had been in before the security guard gave him a look as to say 'I'll be watching you' as Tony got a shopping cart. They headed over to the hoodies first.
"What about this?" Peter asked picking up a grey hoodie.
"You know I've only ever seen you wear hoodies," Tony said smiling. "You can get a few."
"Are you sure ther..."
"Yes I'm sure." Tony said picking up a Star Wars hoodie as well and throwing that in smiling. He also got him a coat.
Peter picked up another two and put them in the cart Tony checked the size and got a few long sleeves t-shirts. Peter had to try a couple pairs of jeans on to see what size he was now and found out he had dropped three sizes since he last got jeans.
"How many you wanting?"
"I was just gonna get these ones," Peter said putting a pair of black ones in the cart.
"You've gotta get more than one, come on Pete."
"I don't like spending your money."
"Well think of it as I'm getting this for me then," Tony said smiling before picking up a few more pairs, another black and 2 dark blue. "Right you need pyjamas."
Peter picked up a set which had a plain white t-shirt and purple checkered pants and a long sleeved dark red t-shirt and grey Star Wars pyjama pants.
Tony got him a couple pairs of shoes. "Okay that's it," Peter said feeling guilty for wasting Tony's money.
"I really don't mind," Tony said as he handed his card over with Peter complaining that it was to expensive.
Once they got to the door the security stopped them and checked their bags and Peter backpack.
"You know you're meant to just go through the shopping bags," Tony said looking angry.
"I'm sorry sir but we've caught him stealing from here before we just have to make sure."
"Oh well I'm sorry about that. I'm sure that won't happen again," Tony said looking at Peter.
"You're free to go, sorry about that."