There is something about the tenderness a woman holds that Sasuke enjoys. A natural nurturer with soft yet strong voices, warm and soothing hands, expressive eyes that contain not only pride but humbleness as well. Never passive for what they keep dear to their hearts, they viciously protect.
A nurturer and a defender.
So understanding, so empathetic. Always generous, for they sacrifice everything to care for one little thing.
Never passive, just humble. Never passive, always strong.
Never passive.
...
Sasuke opens his eyes to bright sunlight pouring into his window. Sweat slowly runs down the side of his face, his breathing finally slows down.
Another nightmare. Sasuke thinks, rolling out of bed. This time it isn't about the burning of his family, it's about his current friends and family abandoning him. He knows this will never happen, but there's always a small possibility his nightmares will come true.
A sigh passes between his parted lips as he begins his routine. Medicine, shower, a talk with mom about his poor life choices, and then back to his room.
He opens the book he's reading with [Name]. Even though he's supposed to be in a mini-book club with her, he hasn't talked to her about how far she's read. It's been a full week, and they haven't spoken since he met her.
The thought of talking to her again brings joy into his heart. The fluttery way she says his name, the huffiness when she brings up her job, everything she talks about he clings to every word.
Guilt bubbles in his stomach since lately, he's been ignoring Sakura. Any time she calls, he gives her quick, uninterested answers or he ignores it altogether. He wonders if he still loves her.
What am I thinking?! Of course, I love Sakura. Quickly, he forgets about calling [Name] and calls Sakura instead to set up a date.
...
"I missed you," Sasuke says breathlessly, pulling Sakura into a kiss. Here they are, cooped up in Sakura's apartment. Her roommate wouldn't be here for another hour or two, so they have time to makeout.
Sakura kisses back feverishly, her skin begs to be touched by him. Sasuke also feels touch-starved, and all his pent up lust for [Name] unleashes on Sakura. His hands touch everywhere, and his lips leave her skin wet and wishing for more.
She digs her fingers into his dark locks, moaning his name as he latches on to her neck. "Sasuke."
He pulls up her shirt, revealing her bra underneath. "I want you so badly."
She hums, feeling his hot breath against her neck. "Take me, Sasuke."
Clothes are off in an instant, and they have sex. But it's different for Sasuke. As he's thrusting wildly into Sakura, listening to her cries of pleasure, he's thinking about [Name]. He may be whispering his girlfriend's name, touching his girlfriend's skin, and pushing deep into her depths, but in his mind, he fantasizing about [Name]. He's thinking about touching her, kissing her, and making her cry out his name the same way Sakura is doing.
He tries focusing on Sakura. He opens his eyes, peering down at her rolled back eyes and open mouth. Desperately, he fucks her faster, ridding himself of any thoughts of [Name]. Her eyelids flutter, and her body withers as he hits her sweet spot. With one last moan, she comes, her nails digging into his back, leaving red marks on his pale skin.
Painstakingly, he tries to come with her. He jerks, as the familiar sensation spreads within his body, but he doesn't peak. He doesn't even come close to the edge.
When their bodies are connected in this intimate act, Sakura is Sasuke's missing piece, and together they create glorious harmony. However, this feels wrong, to Sasuke at least. Nothing feels right, nothing feels familiar anymore, as if he's entering foreign territory. He feels weird.
It's at this moment, Sasuke realizes he can't get off. Not to Sakura. Not anymore. It doesn't feel right.
He stops. He pulls out, horrified. He gazes at Sakura's flushed face, her eyes glazed over. Soon the fading lust that clouds her eyes turn into concern. She sees the conflict scribbled all over Sasuke's face and furrow her brows.
"I'm... I'm sorry, Sakura, but I have to leave."
Quickly, he dresses. His mind is blank.
Sakura, knowing something is wrong, sits up and covers herself with a discarded quilt.
"Wait, Sasuke." She makes him stop by grabbing his forearm. "What's wrong?"
The gentleness of her voice barely masks the demand. She wants Sasuke to tell her everything. They've been growing apart lately, something Sakura wants to avoid. A little communication wouldn't hurt.
"Please," she speaks softly, but he hears the fierceness in her voice. She's afraid of something and desperate. "Tell me, Sasuke."
Sasuke hesitates. What is he supposed to say? Just tell her he can't get off to her anymore?
"Nothing," he mumbles, pulling his pants up.
"No. No! There's something wrong," she stands, dropping the quilt. "What is it?"
"It's nothing."
"Sasuke, I'm afraid that we're growing apart... and... and soon, you're going to dump me."
His hardened expression softens once he notices the fear flashing behind her eyes. He cups her cheeks and presses a kiss to her lips. Their foreheads touch, and Sasuke smiles. "I'm just a little sick, is all. I'm sorry we haven't talked lately. I feel awful."
Sakura is about to kiss him, but his phone interrupts them. It rings, trumpeting out a jolly tune. She notices the sparkle in his eyes as he retrieves it. As Sasuke glances at the caller ID, he grins and immediately takes the call.
The cheeriness and the laughter throw her for a spin. He hasn't talked to her like that in weeks. The worry that was almost put to rest suffocates her. She needs his attention.
As he hangs up, Sakura hastily questions him. "Who was that? What did they want? Are you leaving?"
She wants to grab his phone and look through his recents, but Sasuke shoves it into his pocket.
"Oh, just a friend."
"A girl friend, or a guy friend?"
He shrugs. "Why does it matter. Look, I have to go."
He heads to the door.
"Sasuke."
He ignores her call and waves at her. "I'll see you later, babe, call me tonight."
"Wait! Sasuke!"
The door shuts with a hushed click.
And she stands there, naked and scared.
Scared that her relationship is falling apart.
...
The call was from [Name], and she just invited Sasuke out for dinner. He arrives at a diner, meeting her inside. His grin falters when he sees Reena and May with her. He thought they'd be alone.
"Sasuke!" [Name] waves him over just in time for them to be seated in a booth. The four of them settle in, and to Sasuke's misfortune, he sits across from [Name] instead of next to her.
"It's girl's night, but Reena insisted that I invite you," [Name] explains as she looks at the menu. "How are you?"
"I'm doing well," he says. "Could be better."
Reena rolls her eyes. "Now that we've got the small talk out the way, Sasuke, honey, do you have a girlfriend cause [Name] is super lonely and in search of a man."
The pressure hits Sasuke instantly, drying up his throat and raising his anxiety. He doesn't know how to answer. If he says yes, [Name] will drop him like a fly, but if he says no, he'll be lying and cheating on Sakura.
"Wha-! No!" [Name] smacks Reena's arm. "I'm not looking for anyone right now."
[Name] unknowingly saves Sasuke's bacon, and now he can laugh this off awkwardly. Their waiter comes over and takes their orders and drinks. For now, they sip on water and make light conversation.
"Where do you live, Sasuke?" May asks unexpectedly. Once again, it seems like an elephant is sitting on his chest, and all the air is squeezing out of his lungs.
He coughs and clears his throat. "Well, I live on the outskirts of town, deep in the suburbs."
Reena snorts. "You're being so humble, it's annoying. I saw the type of car you showed up in. You have butterfly doors."
"Didn't you say you were an Uzumaki?" [Name] asks and Sasuke nods. His adoptive parents are famous for their company which regularly donates and supports all progressive causes. They're able to slap their name on anything and have it sell like hotcakes.
"I'm adopted though," Sasuke says to clear up any confusion since he knows for sure he looks nothing like the Uzumaki's. "But I live with them."
"Wait, so you still live with mommy?" Reena laughs. "Why don't you move out? You're old enough, and clearly rich enough."
Again, [Name] smacks Reena's arm. "Don't be rude," she whispers.
Sasuke shrugs. "Too unstable, I guess. My mental health hasn't been the best."
"What happened? If you don't mind me asking," [Name] says softly with a smile. A lot of people asked him that, and not once has he just randomly told a stranger all his problems. But [Name], he wants to tell her everything. The air around her is comforting and strong, and he falls into its trap happily. He loves her warmth.
"Well," he lowers his voice. "Fourteen years ago, my home burned down. Everyone I loved died. My mom, my dad... Itachi. Ever since then, I've dealt with PTSD, depression, panic attacks, and anxiety."
Something slides across the table, and Sasuke glances at it. [Name's] hand. It's her hand. She's holding it out to him. Without a second thought, he takes it. She rubs her thumb against the back of his hand, sending pulses of heat up his arm.
"Wait, Itachi?" Reena butts in. "Isn't he an Uchiha? That would make you Sasuke Uchiha, which can't be right cause everyone died that night."
Reena glares. "Who are you really?"
Sasuke blinks and sighs. He remembers the news report days after the tragedy. There was so much they got wrong. Itachi dead? Might be true, but his body was never found. Someone planned the attack? Wrong again, it was a complete accident. Sasuke died? Nope. Living, but not thriving.
All that wrong information seeped into the minds of the people, making them believe all the Uchihas are dead.
Sasuke stares at the hand he's holding. For once in his life, he feels like he's on top of the world.
"Sasuke Uchiha. Adopted by Minato and Kushina Uzumaki," he says, squeezing [Name's] hand. "They covered up the adoption so the press wouldn't be in my face all the time. I was home-schooled up until high school so no one would remember the little eight-year-old boy, scarred for life. So no one would ask me questions about my past."
[Name] hits Reena for the third time that night. "Please ignore her, she's a little drunk, and she's a mean drunk."
Reena nods, feeling bad for being so rude. "Sorry."
Sasuke smiles, but his eyes water. "It's fine. Let's just enjoy the night, yeah?"
...
A/N: I put a lot of love into this story, that's why chapters take so long. I want this book to be perfect. Love you, goodbye.