Every day is a battle.
Every day I struggle to wake up and face every problem and worry I have.
Every day I think about what it would be like to leave this world
Every day I wish that I didn't have to put so much effort into just being stable.
Some days are good,
When other days I feel like I am falling apart like the twin towers, hit with something out of nowhere.
I can never know when the next big thing will happen.
Will mom try to kill herself again?
Will someone decide I'm no longer good enough for them again?
Will I fall again after all the work I've done into just getting back up?
It's a fight, but I will continue to fight in the war I have with myself and my demons every day.
The way I have for years.
I will continue to fight.
I have to.
Because I'm too scared to find out what will happen if I give up now.