Posted: November 15th, 2018
♛ Jhanvi ♛
2.15 In Plain Sight
Reaching the stairs, I turn to climb up backwards. Aarush's forehead creases questioningly and I offer, placing my hand on the rail. "It's easier." Climbing up the stairs with a broken foot is not the easiest task especially when I can't even see my own feet. After only climbing four steps, one at a time, I end up winded. "Or so I thought." I mutter feeling silly.
The corner of his lips twitch in the faintest of a smile.
I scold, "Don't laugh. It's not funny."
Okay... maybe it is. But right now, it is a bit frustrating.
He takes a step down and stands in front of me. His eye level matches mine as he forwards his hand. My brows draw together having no idea why he's asking for my hand. I just need a moment to catch my breath before I can start climbing again.
When my arms remain by my side, he reaches forward to hold it on his own. Never once does he blink away and he seriously needs to. It's hot as it is without him turning this intense. He probably does not even realize the effect it has on me - and that's the cruel part, if you ask me. How did I get myself into a situation where I am fake-married to one guy while finding myself attracted to another?
He brings my hand to his shoulder and leaves it there before sliding one arm on my back, other arm under my thighs, and lifts me off the ground.
My breath catches in my chest at finding myself so close him. Touching him.
My mind flashes back to the first time anyone carried me. The first time he carried me in that parking lot just weeks ago.
I remind myself to breathe before asking him, "Please put me down. I don't like being carried."
"Why? Don't you trust me?" His voice near my ear has my muscles tense further, adding to my fear. I do believe he won't drop me but irrational fears are just that; irrational.
He is quick to blink away afterwards as if he hadn't meant to ask such a question. My eyes, however, remain on him as he begins climbing. Unconsciously, my hand around his shoulder fists his vest to contain my fear at bay.
If he notices, he chooses to not make it obvious for which I am glad.
I lose myself in imprinting his face in my memory. As if somewhere my heart knows... what future do I have with the guy? After short few days together, our paths were going to separate. And these memories, that's all I would have to hold on to. That's all I was going to remember of our time together.
Those deep eyes, charcoal black. Normally intense. Always hiding something with a blank exterior. Long lashes. Every time they blink. It should be naturally impossible for them to be so long and beautiful. High cheek bones. It could make any girls' hand twitch, wanting to touch them. That sharp jawline. Beyond attractive. Lips pressed in a thin line. I have yet to see a full smile on his face.
No feature ever betraying his thoughts.
I thought Aarav controlled his expressions in public. But in less than a week when he'd learn of my pregnancy and we'd started being around each other more, I had seen variations of his expressions.
But Aarush... Even in private, away from everyone's eyes, this guy carrying me holds such command over himself.
Every day I am around him, I find myself becoming more familiar with the discipline in his life on every aspect.
I blink away from my staring when he leans to place me gently on the floor having reached the second floor. I loosen my grip on his strap and pull my hand back. Glancing sideways, I warn. "Don't do that again, ever."
My words and tone both may be stern as I am dead serious and if he wants to think I was uncomfortable, he can think that but this goes beyond discomfort for me.
"Sorry, won't happen again." He says in a quiet voice, void any feelings and still I get the feeling that he takes it personally.
I close my eyes for a moment and exhale, unknotting my muscles in the process as well. "It's not you," I inform so he won't feel bad over putting me in a mood. "I really don't like being carried. That's all."
His eyes search for mine for something as he nods. I nod back since he gets the message and look around wondering which way to go. He points to the right, "This way." He opens a door to reveal the unit.
Then he explains that it shut down because it's not cooling. The air inside was being absorbed but it wasn't condensing.
"Seriously? Issue with the airflow? Neither you or Vikas could solve that?" I challenge raising a brow. I am sure even Google would have told them the solution if they had bothered to search it.
"Uh no? I don't know how to fix the issue with the outside unit."
I shake my head moving past him. "There's nothing wrong with the condenser outside. You just need to change the filter."
"Where's that?"
I mumble, "I am so judging you right now," while bending and pulling a tube out so I can reach the filter.
Alas, it's not so easy because when I pull it, the water that had been held back poured out onto the floor. I take rapid steps back to not get my cast wet and end up crashing into his front. One hand of his comes to my shoulder to steady me while the other on my side just as the baby decides to react to my sudden sprint.
His palm stiffens there as he feels it too.
Well then, what do you know? Mr. Army Rawal does not know how to react to a baby.
I chuckle and gently bring his hand back to my belly. When I twist my head back, he is already looking at me, a mix of confusion and fear and surprise.
That makes me feel something. Biting back that feeling, I smile up at him. "Relax, it's just a baby. Not an alien."
He awkwardly pulls his hand back. "Sorry."
I reply with a smile and shake of my head to indicate he didn't need to apologize for being taken off guard. My attention is pulled again to the little person inside of me, "Baby, please stop moving for one minute so I can solve this issue and we can both be happy, yeah?"
He clears his throat and when I look up, he asks. "You... uh, talk to it?"
His lack of knowledge of babies is refreshing. It reminds me of a time months ago when I was the same... a time less complicated. "Yes, I talk to her and she listens most of the time. How do you think a baby recognizes their mother once they're born?"
"I don't know, instinct?
"That, yes, but also because they can recognize their mothers voice. In fact, if you were to talk to her and she becomes familiar with it, she'd recognize you too."
"Really?" He asks in surprise and I nod.
I realize we got distracted as much as it is nice to get his curiosity, there is a task at hand. "I can give you more lessons later. Shall we do this first?"
He blinks away the calmness and turns stoic. "Yes, tell me what to do?"
I step aside, agreeing and show him where the filter is so he can remove it. I cringe at how dirty it is. No wonder airflow was restricted. He leaves to get rid of it and returns moments later with a new one that I imagine he had to ask Martha for its whereabouts. He fits it in, reconnects the tube and turns on the switch.
"Now?"
"Now we wait." I really hope this was it and we don't have to change the outside condenser as well.
As we walk back down, one step at a time, he asks a bit uncertainly as if its not normal for him to start a conversation but something makes him, "Uh, so, I thought babies only recognize their parents voice?"
"You really don't know anything about babies, do you?"
"Why would I?"
"Good point." I say to myself.
I don't see a ring on his finger so safely assume he is not married. But, that night, I had seen two rings hanging off the chain he wears around his neck. It does have me curious on his personal life but I highly doubt he would be open to discussing it considering it's pretty tough as is to get him to talk about things in general.
I continue, "And, to answer your question, I suppose that would be usually. But hey, Aarav reads to her, mostly - even though it's legal jargon when he's going over contracts so not sure its baby material and pretty sure she's going to turn out abnormal but what can I do?"
He chuckles at the joke shaking his head.
I add, grinning myself. "I wasn't kidding about the contracts."
"I'd be explaining guns to her so I'll say contracts are a safer bet. Atleast she'll grow up to be a businesswoman or a lawyer or something."
I glance at him surprised, lips parting slightly at his ability to sass back and keep up with mine. "Well, well. Where have you been hiding?"
"In plain sight." He answers so confidently that it makes me laugh.
"Good one. I approve."
"I feel honored."
"You should. Not everyone can keep up."
Aarav chirps in as he walks out of the kitchen wiping his hands on a towel, "Believe her. I can never get it out of her."
"Because you don't try," I inform before soothing the blow as Aarush falls silent, "Don't worry, dear. Not everyone can do everything."
Aarav squints, "You just want us to admit how you fixed the AC but three guys couldn't."
"That would make my day, yes." I accept right away having no shame about wanting to gloat my accomplishment. "But forget that. What happened in the 20-something minutes we were gone?"
He tries to be coy, "What do you mean?"
"You were chirping."
"I wasn't chirping."
I ignore his lies and continue to insist, "You haven't chirped since oh, you know, about 2 weeks."
"Will you stop saying chirping? It's such a weird word."
I put my hands on my hips, "Will you just tell me already?"
His lips turn up, "Guess who is visiting tomorrow."
There is only one guess. I gasp slightly, "Shut up! You called her?"
"That was the deal," he says trying to not make a big deal out of it.
I sit at the chair he pulls out. "The way you kept being about the whole situation, I had my doubts."
He walks a few feet away afterwards to get to the kitchen. "I wasn't being anything about the whole situation."
I chuckle, judging, as I open up the napkin and place it on my lap. "That was the problem, buddy."
"Gee, thanks. But, anyway, technically, I didn't call."
"See, proving my point." I interject.
He puts a plate of food in front of me and emphasizes to convey I need to shut up and let him finish the story-telling, "I messaged her. She didn't reply, ofcourse, but then you know me. I messaged again, and again, and again."
"Way to hound her."
He grows a little irritated, "You're growing into Khushi, you know? One who never listens and keeps interrupting by passing comments."
I speak while chewing, "And you get easily distracted."
"Right," he takes a seat and continued with the story, "So she finally breaks and calls me. Tells me I have 5 minutes and cut to the end, she'll be here tomorrow around 10."
I scold him with some sass, "You know what would be great? For you to tell me the real story. Which, by the way, would include what you told her that made her agree to come here because when we last met, she was pretty insistent on staying in an entirely different universe. A different lifetime if it'd be up to her, but you know what I mean."
"You're quite chatty today, aren't you? What did you have for breakfast again?"
"And you're trying to avoid the topic. C'mon, spill. You can't tell me or baby Raichand a story without actually telling the part that makes it a story."
"Baby Raichand? Why not Baby Raizada?"
I raise a brow to silently point out the reality. Why would she be a Raizada?
He caves, "Okay, fine. Baby Raichand."
"Thanks for the approval that I wasn't looking for." Once I swallow, I add a side comment, "Oh, and did you not cook for everyone?"
"It's a story I am still trying to work my head around it so you'll be the first to hear it once I have done that. And I did."
"Where is it?"
"Inside."
"Why is it in the kitchen?"
"Because they've got legs that work and they can get it themselves, duh." He expresses why I am a special case and he brought me food while leaving Vikas and Aarush to fend for themselves.
I bob my head to the side and give him a sideward glance. "I have an excuse to be mean. You don't."
"I wasn't being mean." He puts the spotlight on the boys as he asks them, "Was I being mean?"
"No," both answers right away.
"See!" He says as it speaks in his favor.
"I roll my eyes, pointing out. They work for you. Ofcourse they'll lie to keep their jobs."
He counters, "Vikas works for me. Aarush works for you."
"Okay, if we're going to be technical, your dad pays both of them so they work for him and by default, it means they work for you."
He picks my fork, stabs the pasta on it, and forces it in my mouth. "You're hungry. Eat, will you? And stop talking. Seriously, today is the day you lose it."
I grumble making a face, "You'll regret this." Then I point at the boys, "You two. Go get food. I refuse to sit here by myself and be the only one stuffing food. It makes me feel fat"
Aarav counters, "You're not sitting alone. I am sitting to your right."
I speak keeping my gaze to the plate, "Vikas, be a darling and tell your boss the person sitting to his left is not talking to him."
"Uh..." He answers looking at Aarav.
Aarav puts his hands on the table, "Are you serious?"
"Vikas, remind him that he refused to tell me the entire story, then mocked for me being chatty, then was mean to the two people keeping me alive, then mocked me again by..."
Aarav lets out getting up, "Oh for fuck's sake," and walks into the kitchen. Two seconds later, he returns with two plates. "I'd already put it out. All they had to do was go grab it. Gosh, so much grief for no reason. You two," he points at them while placing the plates over the placemats, "Sit. Eat. Smile. Get her to forgive me or I am getting dad to fire you."
I narrow my gaze at him, "You can't do without threatening anyone in a day, can you?"
Vikas speaks while taking a seat, "Okay, we'll eat. Please, stop fighting."
Aarav and I question at the same time, "Who's fighting?"
"Uh... you two?"
We look at each other and laugh. I explain, "We're not fighting. You haven't seen us fight yet. Come to think of it, we don't fight that much. I mean, the only time we fought was that time when I was sick and he demanded I go back home and eat and I refused."
Aarav comments, "Ah, yes. You were pissed I called you Shona."
"Well, duh. You were my supervisor. It was extremely inappropriate and uncalled for. And anyway, the next time was when I threw up and it confirmed my pregnancy and you asked me to marry you. Ofcourse I wasn't going to."
"How could I forget how cute you looked standing there in your towel?"
I picked a piece of penne and threw it at him, "Aarav!"
"Oh, right." He says to the guys, "Scratch that image from your heads. But anyway, don't worry. We're not fighting. It's just been boring with nothing to do so we're entertaining ourselves."
Vikas looks at us as if we've grown a second head. "This is entertainment to you? This? Tearing at each other? Insults?"
"It's not insults," I argue. "He knows who he is. I know how I am. We're just saying it how it is."
Vikas still sticks to his point, "You rich people are sick."
Aarav advises, "Hey, I'm not doing this because I choose to. If you don't want to be roped in to play a role, you will keep your thoughts to yourself."
"Listen to him," I mutter and I'll admit. This was my idea and no one says no to the pregnant lady. Selfish, yes. But hey, this excuse isn't going to last long so I don't mind taking the most advantage of it. I sigh leaving the spoon in the plate, "Am I a bad person?"
Aarav reaches for my hand on the table, "Aww, no Shona. Not at all."
Yup, the mood changes. They go from happy to drastically sad in seconds. If I wasn't pregnant, I would check myself into the hospital for mood disorder the way my emotions have been all over the chart.
I go on to crib, "No, you're just saying it because you have to. I'm making everyone's life difficult."
"You know that's not true." He counters gently squeezing my hand when he notices I am at the verge of crying. "I choose to be here and hey, just wait till tomorrow. Everything will be..."
I chastise, "Do not say everything will be okay. I am tired of hearing that. Nothing is getting okay. It just keeps getting worse and worse."
"And it usually gets worse before it gets better. Everyone has to hit rock bottom at one point."
I slip my hand out of his, shaking my head and wiping my cheeks, "This has been one horrible year. Horrible couple of years, actually. Just look at me! I use my pregnancy as an excuse for everything! What person does that? I'm horrible. What person uses their unborn kid as an excuse? I am going straight to hell."
His thumb wipes away the fresh tears before caressing my cheek softly, "Then get in line 'cuz there's no way in hell you're getting there before me."
I roll my eyes at him trying so hard not to break into a smile right now. Even here, he has to compete, and his instant words just make me want to smile. I don't doubt him for a second. I know that no matter what, no matter where, he'd be right there by my side always there to hold my hand when things gets tough.
He smiles back and reaches forth with the back of his fingers to caress away any stray wet stains, "Now cheer up. This is just your mood swings talking. You're not horrible at all. It's the situation and you can beat this. You are stronger than this."
I sniffle and nod in response. He's right. I should blame the situation. I should blame the people who are actually responsible. My father for playing with all our lives. The greedy cop who played with my feelings. The society who still holds backwards and radical thinking.
It's because of the lack of love I got from all of them that I bask in the love Aarav and his family showers on me. It's because I never had it that it makes me want to be greedy for more.
"Now, finish eating."
I grumble, "Will you ever get off my back for my eating habits?"
It's when I glance up that I realize the later breakdown happened in front of watchful eyes. Vikas looks a bit uncomfortable - probably my unexpected crying.
The expression on Aarush's face is harder to decipher.
At first, it may look blank but the second longer that my gaze lingers on him, I wonder if he is trying to figure something out as well. Upon noticing I am looking his way, he offers a small smile - well, it's better described as his lips pressing together and just slightly turning up with the blink of his eyes as if in acknowledgment... of what?
Only he knows.
. . . ∞ . ∞ . ∞ . ∞. . .
∞ author note ∞
Phew! Making this in just before midnight. Been a looonggg day! And first snow in Boston for this winter!
Had to throw in a lighter chapter in between :) Hope you enjoyed Aarav & Jhanvi's banter :D Are you ready for the next chapter??!
QOTC: Would anyone want a POV from one of the people back in Mumbai considering what Shyam is doing there? And if so, suggestions on whose POV?
I don't promise that it will be written/published right away considering how I have papers and presentations submissions along with finals coming up but maybe I can start thinking about what to write over the breaks (December 18th can't come soon, guys!! I'm literally counting the days xD)